


A Jewel in the Rough

by DietCokeofEvil



Category: Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Angst, Arranged Marriage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Family Drama, First Time, Pregnancy, Relationship(s), Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-08
Updated: 2016-08-24
Packaged: 2018-05-25 10:34:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 55
Words: 125,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6191677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DietCokeofEvil/pseuds/DietCokeofEvil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>My first ever fanfic- I haven't done any creative writing in over 20 years.<br/>I've read a few fics here involving an arranged marriage for Inquisitor Trevelyan and wanted to try one of my own.<br/>What if Trevelyan's parents had arranged a marriage for her, but the husband and his family only decide they want her after she becomes the Herald?   I know this is a little angsty and uber dramatic, but I've always wanted to write one like this, so what the heck?<br/>I've already written several chapters, but figured I'd enter one first to see how it goes over.  Criticism is welcome</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Evelyn left the war room looking distressed. She knew that a trip to Halamshiral was inevitable- but she was hoping to put it off as long as she could. She asked why they couldn’t just send a warning to Celene about the assassination attempt, but Josephine and Leliana both agreed that they needed to make the trip and attend the ball. She knew they were right, so she sighed and agreed and left the room.  
She wasn’t sure how to tell them about her reservations, and why she had them, but she needed to talk to someone about it. After a moment’s hesitation, she decided to talk to the one person who might be able to understand her troubles, and after nodding a hello to Varric, headed to the upstairs library. Dorian was sitting in his window seat, reading as usual. He looked up as she approached and after seeing the look in her face, put his book down. “I hear we are going to be heading to the Winter Palace soon.” Dorian said. “Why so downhearted Cousin? Can’t decide what to wear?” Evelyn shook her head. “Can we go somewhere to talk? A place where the walls don’t have ears?” Dorian nodded and followed.  
After making their way to her quarters and barring the door, they sat out on the balcony, comfortable bundled against the chill. While they were distant cousins, they did not meet until the Inquisition, so neither knew anything about the other’s personal history beyond conversations they had while traveling. But Evelyn knew that as a member of a noble family, Dorian would understand her troubles without having to ask too many questions.  
“Dorian, I need to tell you some things about my childhood and early teen years that I’ve not told anyone. The only people who know are my family and probably any servants in our employ at the time, and the Chantry I suppose- but I’m not sure how much they even know.”  
Dorian nodded and waited. “You can tell me anything Cousin. I’m the last to judge you know”.

Evelyn smiled and continued. “I’m the youngest of five. My eldest brother Osborne is married and has taken his place as Heir to the Trevelyan line. My sister, Clarissa is also married with a few children- she married into a respectable noble house through an arrangement. My other brother, Warrick joined the Templars. I was closest to him as a child because we were only a year apart, but he was gone when I really needed him. My other sister, Charlotte, went to the Chantry when she was young. As for me, Father originally planned to marry me off to Phillipe Remarche, the son of a noble Orlesian family in order to show the appearance of promoting peaceful relations with Orlais. I was too young to understand all the details, but I spent a lot of time learning Orlesian customs and ways of life in preparation for the life ahead of me.”  
“I was always seen as a bit of a disappointment to my Mother. My siblings were all “ideal” in her eyes. Good looking, pleasing to the eye, perfect in every way- you know…” Evelyn trailed off and sighed. “Then there was me. I was plain, and I knew it. I tried so hard to please Mother- doing well in my studies and training. By the time I was thirteen, I was all arms and legs, and I was shorter than desired. My hair was the wrong color, my nose just a bit off, my hands too small. I heard it all. I went to bed praying to the Maker to make me prettier, better, brighter- and of course, those prayers went unanswered.”

“Then, when I was 16, the day came to meet my future husband and make wedding preparations. My mother and the servants spent two days primping me and preparing me for the meeting. They spared no expense on a fine wardrobe including masks and all the other fussy pieces expected in Orlesian society. We traveled to Lydes to meet my new husband- the journey was long and terrifying to me, and Mother nagged me the whole way about what I should and shouldn’t do in front of my new family. I spent the entire trip in agony because of the dresses, and dread, because I was going from one relatively unhappy life into another. I knew from my studies that I would be a second class member of Orlesian society while my husband’s family would gain status for it for showing benevolence and charity to the great unwashed. 

When I was presented to my fiancé, the look of disdain on his face cut me to the bone. His father and mother were gracious to me, as you would be when you take a charity case into your home, but at least they were nice to my face. Phillipe, my fiancé, on the other hand, would not even look at me. I was devastated. I stood there in my elegant gown, with that stupid mask- I could barely breathe because of the corsets and that maker damned mask. My hair had so many pins in it that it took hours to put up, and the pins were cutting into my head. Yet I stood straight and tall, and he sneered at me. He told me to take my mask off, and when I did, he left the room.  
After the first meeting, wedding plans started immediately. We were to be married within the week. I tried to find Phillipe so we could get to know each other a little, but he was always gone or busy. I spent some time with my future Mother in Law, and she was kind- but I could tell that she was disappointed in me too. I overheard the Remarche’s talking one night about it- it turns out that they had met my family and had wanted Clarissa for Phillipe, but she had already had an arrangement. Since Charlotte had already made her Chantry vows, she was unavailable as well. Whatever our families gained from this arrangement was strong enough that they finally agreed on me, sight unseen.

The day of the wedding, I woke up to find that Phillipe had left in the night to go to Val Royeaux. He didn’t even leave a note. Both of our parents were furious at me, and spent hours questioning me about what I may have said or done to ruin things. Finally, we packed and left for home. Immediately upon our return, they sent me to the Chantry to live the rest of my life. I spent my first week in the Chantry in seclusion- I was so shattered and humiliated that I couldn’t bear to speak to anyone. To be rejected by your own parents for things you can’t control makes you feel like the most worthless and unloved person in the world.” Evelyn paused and wiped away a tear.

“When I had been at the Chantry for a week, one of the Brothers, Clancy took me under his wing. He had led a rather unsavory life before joining and he taught me to use and throw daggers and how to pick locks. I ended up being a quick study. I had worked my way up the ranks in the Chantry because of my knowledge of Orlais, and because I spent all of my spare time studying and practicing with my daggers. I also became closer with Charlotte since we had plenty of time to spend together. She was so clever- most likely; she would have ended up being our Revered Mother after a while. Charlotte always told me that I needed to have more confidence in myself, that I was a jewel in the rough. Being in the Chantry protected me from the outside world- I had friends for the first time, and people put faith in me like no one ever had. So they sent me to the Conclave. I lost my friends in the explosion, including Clancy. And Charlotte too. I miss her every day.” Evelyn had gotten up and started pacing nervously as she told her story and at that point, collapsed to the ground sobbing. Dorian quickly knelt down to hold her close. They stayed that way for a few minutes until Evelyn calmed down. She had never spoken of Clancy and Charlotte to anyone. She had hoped they would be among survivors, but every day that the rubble was sifted through, she knew there was no hope.

“Phillipe is at the Winter Palace, as are his parents. My mother would write letters informing me of his whereabouts, partly as punishment for my failure, and because for some reason, she thought there might still be hope for a match. He hasn’t married yet as far as I know. Between my distant family members suddenly loving me so much, and using my name to gain their purpose, and this, I don’t know how much more I can handle. With my new and much more “influential” status, the way I look will no longer be an issue”. 

Dorian looked at the Inquisitor. “What do you think you look like? The way you describe yourself, I get the feeling that you don’t think very much of yourself” he said. Evelyn shrugged. “I stopped thinking about it. I was prepared for a life cloistered in a Chantry. Vanity is not exactly encouraged there. And since the explosion, I’ve had other things on my mind. Mother always complained that I was “plain”. If you saw me compared to the rest of my family, you would understand. Clarissa was the town beauty- long flowing hair, porcelain face- you know…, and Osborne and Warrick- well, handsome and chiseled are the first two words that come to mind. Charlotte was also very pretty. People said it was a waste for her to go the Chantry, but she had been promised. Philippe was the same way- he was very…Cullen-like I guess. Compared to them, I’m nothing to look at.”  
“So do you want to marry him if the opportunity arises? I’ve been under the impression that you had your eye on someone here.” Dorian said. Evelyn started and stared at him. 

“What are you talking about?” she asked. Dorian smiled. “Cousin, do you think I didn’t notice how quiet you get when our own strapping young Templar walks into the room. You can barely look him in the face, and you fidget and practically find any excuse to leave the room whenever he comes in. You have a crush on our Commander. Just the other day, Cassandra asked you to give a report to Cullen for her and you went white and dropped your breakfast plate on the ground.”  
Tears came to Evelyn’s eyes again. “I do like Cullen. He’s so kind and well, chivalrous. From the moment I saw him helping a hurt soldier, I could not stop thinking about him. But why would he like me? Many women here who are a part of the Inquisition have made a play for him. I heard one of the kitchen girls the other day talking about it. He stammered and started rubbing his neck, but he turned her away nicely. If that girl didn’t attract him, I stand no chance at all.”

Dorian stood up and held his hand out to Evelyn. She took it, and he lead her into her room to a mirror. He put her in front of the mirror and said “You’ve told me how you see yourself. Now I will tell you what I see. Clear, bright blue eyes, lovely pale skin, slightly plump lips that begged to be kissed, and a smile that lights up a room. Aside from learning how to use a few cosmetics, a more flattering haircut and some clothes that accentuate your assets, you have nothing to be ashamed of.” Evelyn blushed and started to disagree with him. Dorian held up a hand. “Tomorrow, the seamstresses will be coming in to take measurements and design an outfit for Halamshiral under Madame Vivienne’s supervision. We will take that time to make a few...adjustments. If you like of course.” Evelyn looked at herself in the mirror. She hadn’t done anything with her hair in a long time, and she had vowed to never wear face paint again after the Lydes disaster, and she guess she never did pay much attention to her clothes. She always just wore comfortable baggy clothes when she wasn’t in her armor.  
“And of course, once we have you all made over and confident, we shall work on your love life” Dorian announced. Evelyn’s eyes widened in horror. “No Dorian. I can’t…” Dorian hushed her. “Yes, you can. I happen to think that maybe our dear Commander may have his eye on you. He certainly doesn’t have his eye on me, so why not?”


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I've attempted to do a better job at paragraph organization and breakup so its easier to read. I have it all formatted on my computer, but didn't realize it wouldn't copy over here when I add it. 
> 
> As stated in the comments, Dorian sort of becomes a fairy godmother.

Chapter Two  
That evening, Dorian paid a visit to Madame Vivienne. He didn’t tell her everything Evelyn had told him, but persuaded Vivienne that it was time to cut Evelyn’s hair, and find her some more flattering outfits. As the face of the Inquisition, it was direly needed. Vivienne did not need any convincing- she had been trying to tell Evelyn the same thing since the day they met. “My dear, I already took the liberty of having some clothing made for our Inquisitor”, said Vivienne, “They arrived the other day. I shall bring them along tomorrow. I also know that there is an Elven servant here who is good with hair and makeup- I will see she gets assigned to be the Inquisitor’s lady immediately. It’s time for our little rogue to establish herself.” 

After that, Dorian went to the Undercroft to have a word with Harritt about new armor. She had been wearing some castoffs that fit her after complaining that the Dragon armor they had come up with for her was too bulky and interfered with her fighting style. Harritt and Dagna showed him some designs they had for a medium armor with a vest and large sash. It would give Evelyn moderate protection without hampering her during battle. Dagna had also worked out a sigil to be attached for extra protection. They promised to have it ready as soon as they could.

The next day, the seamstresses, Vivienne and Dorian hustled Evelyn up to her quarters to begin preparations. Evelyn stood quietly as she was measured over and over again, bolts of fabric held up, rejected or approved, different designs shown and rejected. It brought her back to when she was preparing for her trip to Lydes, which did not put her in a very good mood. In a fit of temper, she vehemently rejected the latest design presented to her- it looked very much like the dress she wore that fateful day. Realizing what she had just done, she apologized. “I’m sorry”, she said to the seamstresses. “Please excuse my outburst, I have much on my mind today.”   
Vivienne picked up the design that Evelyn had knocked out of their hands and looked at it. “My dears, I fear this dress is just simply… too Orlesian. Our Inquisitor is a Free Marcher. Maybe we need to take that direction with her outfit.” 

Evelyn shook her head. “I don’t want to look like an Orlesian or a Free Marcher. I want to look like the Inquisition,” she stated matter-of-factly. Evelyn had never paid much attention to fashion, preferring to dress her own way, except for when she was being dressed by her mother. She had never been taught how to pick out flattering clothes in the right colors for her. She remembered her mother bemoaning that Evelyn was an “autumn” when she had so hoped for a “winter”, whatever the hell that meant.  
Dorian thought for a moment. “Ladies, give us a moment,” he said, taking her out to the balcony. “I know you are struggling, but trust me.” Evelyn swiped her hands angrily over her eyes, trying to collect herself. While Vivienne and the seamstresses were inherently kind during this process, she kept flashing back to her Mother and that awful woman who was fitting her into that dress when she was sixteen. She didn’t even realize how much she hated Orlesian fashion until she saw the sketches a few minutes ago. Dorian continued “So what do you want then? Do you want to tantalize, enchant? Do you want to go practical?”

Evelyn shook her head. “I don’t know,” she said desperately, “If it’s not a shapeless shift and a pair of pants, or a Chantry habit, I’m lost. I don’t care about what Phillipe thinks. I just need something that I can fight in. I’m sure the opportunity will arise”. 

Dorian thought for a moment. The poor soul was so lost, it made him angry on her behalf. He walked around her, appraising her from all angles. Suddenly, his eyes lit up. “I have an idea. Will you trust me with this?”

Evelyn nodded and they headed back inside. “Ladies, if I can make some suggestions. Let’s go over this while Chana and Vivienne look after our Inquisitors hair and makeup. Chana, Evelyn’s new lady and Vivienne took Evelyn and sat her down at her desk and started to discuss her hair. Evelyn sat with an air of bemusement. The last time this had happened to her, the environment was so different- everyone was so critical and business-like and didn’t care what she wanted. This time, it was all about her. Chana asked her questions and listened carefully, considering how to work with what Evelyn wanted. Chana recommended to keep her hair long- maybe not as long as it was, some length, but a style that was easy to put up when needed. Chana started by trimming her hair into a neater style, and cut off a few inches. It made her hair more manageable and neat looking when it was down, and easy to sweep into a pony tail or a braid when the situation called for it. Her hair was curly and days of sun exposure had lightened the color and brought out reddish highlights. When that was done, they brought out the cosmetics. Evelyn frowned- she wasn’t wild about something she had to fuss with every day. She had had some tattooing done around her eyes in honor of those lost at Haven recently and was very pleased with it and planned on getting some more done in the future. Vivienne talked her into learning how to apply makeup around the eyes and on the lips, and a little color on her cheeks- for when she was at Skyhold meeting dignitaries and carrying out her judgement duties. Evelyn actually began to enjoy herself a little, especially when she saw her reflection. The haircut and little bit of makeup had not transformed her into a beautiful swan, but she felt more beautiful than she ever had. Dorian looked up from their sketches and smiled. “A little confidence goes a long way; don’t you agree Cousin? You look magnificent!” After putting on some of the clothes that Vivienne had ordered for her, she didn’t know what to do with herself. The clothing was a bit more form fitting than she was used to, but the colors suited her and the long boots were very comfortable.

Dorian and the seamstresses then showed her the idea they had come up with. Everyone was going to be wearing the same crimson and royal blue formal outfit. Evelyn’s would be almost the same, with the jacket cut just a bit higher on the hem to show her legs in thigh high tan boots, and a little lower at the neck to show her décolletage. The jacket could be easily switched for the new armor that Harritt was making. “But ser,” one of the seamstresses exclaimed, “the masks will not compliment these…outfits”. 

“No masks,” Evelyn stated firmly. “We may have to play their ridiculous Game, but we are not wearing masks. We are the Inquisition, there to keep the Empress safe. We are not there to grovel and curry favor”. Evelyn was very well versed in the customs and traditions surrounding the masks, but found that she didn’t really care. For all of the airs that the Remarches had put on, their fancy masks and clothes, she felt they had shown their true colors when Phillipe ran away in the night, like a coward. Evelyn began to see the whole horrible situation in a different light. She was sixteen, a stranger in a strange land, browbeaten by her parents into a marriage that would make her miserable, and yet, she stayed. This idea sparked in the back of her mind, and she stowed it away to think over later.

Vivienne considered, fingering the jewel encrusted mask. “Darling, I do believe I agree with you. We need to be at our best and we need to make a statement. I will make sure to inform Josephine and Leliana at once”. With that, Vivienne left, with the seamstresses following. 

Dorian took Evelyn’s hand and pulled her into his embrace. “Cousin, you are wonderful! The rest of the day is ours to do as we wish. Are you ready to make a grand entrance and put everyone to shame?” Evelyn looked at herself critically in the mirror again. The change wasn’t radical, but it was noticeable. She wasn’t used to being the center of attention where she was admired- she still struggled with what was happening since she became the Herald. It was a far cry from her days in Ostwick where she was barely paid attention to until something was needed of her. Now, she had companions… friends, who loved her, and she loved in return. But she was not used to compliments and ended up stammering and red faced when someone paid her one. 

Dorian noticed her discomfort and suggested that they have dinner and drinks brought up. They could eat, gossip, read, try on more clothes or whatever she wanted. Evelyn liked the idea immensely. “Could we invite Varric up for some Wicked Grace?” Dorian, always up for a game readily agreed. A half hour later, trays, bottles and Varric had arrived and festivities commenced. 

While in the middle of a hand, Varric looked at Evelyn “Lady, something is different about you.” Evelyn blushed. Varric looked more closely at her- yes, they had dressed her up, changed her hair and put on some makeup, but it was more than that. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it, but he liked it.

Before she could start getting awkward, Dorian interrupted “Now now, Varric, a lady shouldn’t have to reveal her secrets” he said with a wink. After a few more hours of cards and some stories from Varric, the little party broke up. Before leaving for the evening, Dorian sat down with Evelyn for a few more minutes. “I know you have gone through much in the last weeks- things that would make the strongest person buckle. But you have stayed standing, and have become stronger for it. It is time for you to come out of the shadows and be the person you were meant to be. Not who your parents wanted, and certainly not who Phillipe wanted. Be who your sister wanted you to be.” Evelyn smiled and hugged him before he left for the night.

Evelyn spent some time staring at herself in the mirror after Dorian left, thinking about what he had said. She knew that she had many challenges ahead of her, and that she may not live through it. As she prepared for bed, she carefully combed through her hair again, deciding she liked the style. She hadn’t really listened to Vivienne when they had talked about Evelyn dressing properly to receive guests at Skyhold, and she regretted it a little- making a mental note to talk to her soon. As she drifted off, she found her thoughts turning to Cullen and wondering if Dorian was right.


	3. Chapter Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This one is a bit shorter and choppy. I may come back to fix it up, but I wanted to keep on a roll with getting my chapters on here.

Chapter Three

The next morning, Evelyn woke to Chana coming in with a breakfast tray and a note from Dorian.

“My dear Cousin, eat some breakfast, let Chana fuss over you and wear the blue outfit. Meet me in the garden in an hour. Love, Dorian.”

Evelyn sighed, and did as she had been told. An hour later, Chana had helped her with her hair and makeup and gotten her into the blue outfit Vivienne had given her last night. The top was a medium blue velvet long sleeved tunic with a V neck- not cut too low, but low enough to get the idea. Underneath were black leggings and knee high black boots. Her hair was loose and wavy and just a little makeup to highlight. Evelyn stared at herself in the mirror, still unbelieving that she could look…beautiful. Chana smiled “You look lovely, your Worship. Now off with you!”. Evelyn made her way down the stairs, hesitating at the door to the Throne room. She wavered about opening the door, suddenly feeling shy. There was a sudden knock at the door, and Evelyn heard Varric’s voice from behind it. “Come on Lady, Sparkler doesn’t have all day”. The door was opened for her and Varric took her by the hand and pulled her out into the Throne room. As they made their way to the Garden door, Evelyn looked up and saw Vivienne standing on her balcony, looking approving. Vivienne nodded and walked away. After they reached the door, Varric opened it for her and pushed her through. She walked through to the garden to see Dorian sitting in the gazebo with Cullen, a chess board between them. Evelyn stopped in her tracks, shocked. Leave it to Dorian…

“Gloat all you like; I have this one” Cullen said smugly. Evelyn hid behind a post, working up the courage to go over. Mother had never allowed her to be around men aside from family. She had some male tutors, but they were hired help- so the only real experience she had with men was Phillipe, and that wasn't saying much. She drew a breath, patted her hair into place and started to walk over.

“Are you sassing me Commander? I didn’t know you had it in you,” said Dorian as he lounged in his chair.

“Why do I even… Inquisitor!” Cullen started, partially coming to a stand as Evelyn approached. She blushed, and forced herself to stay.

“Leaving are you? Does this mean I win? “asked Dorian.

Cullen returned to his seat as Evelyn asked “Are you two playing nice?” Evelyn was surprising herself with the fact that she not only hadn't turned and ran, but had actually spoken without stammering in front of Cullen, and had said something clever to boot.

“I’m always nice.” Dorian stated, looking back at Cullen. “You need to come to terms with my inevitable victory. You’ll feel much better”.

Cullen moved a piece. “Really? Because I just won and I feel fine.” He laughed.

Dorian looked over the chess board. “Don’t get smug. There will be no living with you.” He said as he got up to leave. He winked at Evelyn on his way out.

“I should return to my duties as well, unless you’d care for a game?” Cullen swept his hand to Dorian’s empty chair in invitation. Evelyn hesitated. Yesterday, she would have stammered a “no thank you”. Today however….

“Prepare the board Commander” she said as she sat down.

As they played, Cullen talked about his family, especially his siblings. It made Evelyn sad. She did not have that kind of relationship with Osborne and Clarissa. It made her miss Warrick and Charlotte even more. As they continued to play, they talked more about Cullen’s childhood and family. She couldn’t stop herself from glancing at him as they played. His smile was so nice, and his voice was so warm and caring.

After a while, Cullen said “This may be the longest we’ve gone without discussing the Inquisition, or related matters. To be honest, I appreciate the distraction”. Shyly, and before she could stop herself she said “We should spend more time together”.

Cullen looked up. “I would…like that” he said smiling.

“Me too” Evelyn said as she moved her chess piece. She thought she was holding herself together pretty well- stoic on the outside, about ready to throw up on the inside.

“You said that,” Cullen said softly. Evelyn and Cullen looked at each other for a moment. “We should...finish our game, right?” said Cullen. “My turn?” They continued to play. “I believe this one is yours” Cullen said as Evelyn won. “Well played. We shall have to try again sometime.” Evelyn smiled at him. They sat for a little while longer, talking and shuffling pieces on the chessboard before both returning to their duties.

Later that day, Cullen sat beside her as lunch was served. As they chatted, Evelyn noticed Dorian smiling gloatingly from the other end of the table and sighed. There was going to be no living with him now.


	4. Chapter Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know I've been regurgitating scenes from the game quite a bit- the next chapter is where poop starts hitting the fan. Sorry for the gap- I've been going through my first playthrough of Mass Effect 3 and am a bit obsessed with it at the moment.

Chapter Four

The next day, Evelyn left for the Fallow Mire with Dorian, Blackwall and the Iron Bull. She hadn’t wanted to leave, but they had to rescue the soldiers before something happened to them. They had slogged around in the muck for about a week when a messenger arrived with her new armor. Evelyn ran a hand over the soft vest- how something could be soft and armored at the same time simply amazed her. She put on her new armor, slipped her daggers into the holsters on her back and secured her lock picking tools at her waist. Dorian nodded approvingly as she left the tent. Even Bull and Blackwall took an appreciative glance at the way the new armor was cut on her. The leggings clung to her legs and the vest accentuated her chest, and protected it at the same time. She felt appealing and strong without being revealing- a hard thing to pull off when it came to armor. That afternoon (evening? It was so hard to tell here), they made their way to Avvar base camp to deal with Hand of Korth and find the lost soldiers. Sky-Watcher, the Avvar tribesman they had met had assured them the soldiers were still alive, and it had taken them that long to find the base camp in the rain and dark. After making their way through endless walking corpses, they entered the camp. After a hard fought battle that earned the Iron Bull a new weapon, they found and freed the soldiers, and recruited Sky-Watcher as an agent of the Inquisition. 

On their way back to Skyhold, the group camped in the Hinterlands by the lake so they could clean up a bit and get warm. That night while they were sitting around the fire, Iron Bull was teasing Evelyn. “So, you got yourself all made over. Someone special in mind?” He waggled his eyebrows at her. “If you’d like to share my tent tonight, I’d be all over that. Anywhere, anytime” he said leeringly. 

Dorian huffed “You great lummox. Nice to show some interest now. Where were you before?” Dorian never knew what to make of Bull- Qunari and Tevinter did not exactly have the greatest of relationships, but Dorian and Bull, aside from some initial bickering had settled into a tentative friendship. They both realized they couldn’t hold a grudge against their people and needed to unite for a greater cause. It didn’t mean that Dorian didn’t think that Bull was a horn dog and a buffoon.

Iron Bull said “Hey now, I tried last week. She turned all red and hurried off mumbling about finding one of those skull things. She’s finally getting comfortable with herself, thought I’d offer again- you never know. It’ll cost extra if you want to watch.” Evelyn burst out laughing. She noticed that she had been a less shy when talking to people, especially men. She even was getting used to Bull’s constant innuendos. Iron Bull continued “Ah. I don’t stand a chance. Not against Cullen anyway. That guy is just too handsome and nice for his own good.” Evelyn blushed. Did everyone know? She was anxious to get back to Skyhold and see Cullen- she wondered if he had thought of her while she had been gone those two weeks. He had squeezed her hand when they parted before she left, and she still dreamed of the smile he gave her. No one had even shown any romantic interest in her, so she didn’t know what to do next. 

After their return to Skyhold, Evelyn went looking for Cullen. She had decided that she had wasted enough time being timid and waiting for things to happen to her. She found Cullen in his office. Cullen greeted her warmly and they spent some time talking about current events at Skyhold and all that happened in the Fallow Mire. They debated the merits of making the Avvar basecamp into an outpost, but both ended up agreeing that it wasn’t needed. Evelyn stood up to leave, but hesitated. Cullen looked at her. “Was there something you needed?” Evelyn, after steeling herself, replied “I thought we could talk. Alone.” 

“Alone? I mean… of course,” Cullen said. He gestured toward the door out to the battlements. As they walked along the battlements, Evelyn was surprised to see that Cullen seemed nervous. “It’s…a nice day” Cullen stammered. 

Surprised at his nervousness, she stopped walking and blurted “What?” Cullen attempted to gather himself “It’s…there was something you wanted to discuss?”   
Evelyn, embracing the moment and silently thanking Dorian for encouraging her bravery said “I find myself thinking of you. More than…well, all the time really.” She held her breath, imagining him turning her down- that he didn’t think of her that way.

Cullen looked down and started shifting around. “I can’t say I haven’t wondered what it would be like.” Even though he knew he had strong feelings for Evelyn, he was afraid of timing and was worried if it was appropriate. Even though Josephine had dropped very strong hints that people should fall in love whenever they can, he wasn’t sure what people would think. 

Evelyn headed toward the battlement wall and leaned on it. “What’s stopping you?” she asked. 

Cullen stopped in front of her. “You’re the Inquisitor, we’re at war. And you… I didn’t think it was possible.” He stepped closer to her and put his hands on her waist. 

Evelyn breathed “And yet, I’m still here.” 

“So you are,” Cullen replied coming in closer yet. “It seems too much to ask. And yet I want to…” Cullen leaned in to kiss her. Evelyn held her breath…

“Commander”

Cullen backed away. Evelyn shifted uncomfortably, partly embarrassed and partly frustrated at the interruption. “You wanted a copy of Sister Leliana’s report.”   
Cullen turned to the messenger. “What.” he growled at him. This messenger always had lousy timing…

“Sister Leliana’s report. You wanted it delivered ‘without delay’” the messenger said, holding up his clipboard. Cullen glared at the messenger, who looked at Cullen, and then over the Inquisitor. Evelyn shuffled and fidgeted, trying to gather her dignity. Backing away, the messenger stated to leave. “Or...to your office… right” he said as he hurried off.  
Evelyn prepared to leave. “If you need to….*gasp*” 

Cullen had grabbed her and kissed her feverishly. Evelyn arms went around him as she returned the kiss- the first kiss of her life. His lips were hard and soft on hers at the same time. Cullen broke away suddenly. “I’m sorry,” he said. “that was um…really nice”. 

As fast as he broke away, Evelyn started to worry. “You don’t regret it do you?” she asked, holding her breath. Cullen started “No! No, not at all.” He leaned back in to kiss her again.


	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

The next morning, Chana awoke Evelyn with a breakfast tray and a note from Leliana. “Inquisitor. I have received a letter that I must speak with you about immediately. I will be to see you in one hour.” Evelyn sighed and got up to start her day. 

My Dearest Evelyn,  
We were most relieved to hear that you survived the explosion at the Chantry, and most distressed to hear of poor Charlotte. We had a lovely memorial service for her -we wish you could have been with us to say goodbye.  
We know that you are very busy with your Inquisitor duties, but we feel that we must remind you that you also have a duty to your family. We had you schooled in Orlesian custom and tradition and prepared you for the life of an Orlesian wife, and expect that you will fulfill this duty. The Remarche family have contacted us to uphold the marriage contract as originally arranged. We cannot, in good faith, renege on this contract. As the Inquisitor, you understand the importance of your word. We know that you will not readily abandon your mission. Phillipe has agreed that he will join you at Skyhold for the present. When your time is done, you can then move back to Lydes. We expect that you will capitulate in an agreeable manner. Please send a letter at your earliest convenience with an outline of your schedule so we may start arranging the wedding.  
Remember- Modest in temper, bold in deed.  
Yours most cordially,  
Mother.

Evelyn let the letter drop to her feet. Her head was pounding with rage to the point where she felt like she was going to black out. Leliana stood silently, waiting for Evelyn to speak. Evelyn looked at her. “How long have you known?” she asked quietly. 

Leliana looked down while she spoke. “I have known since the shortly after you arrived at Haven. My agents found a copy of the marriage contract when we were looking into your background, but I disregarded it due to the circumstances.” Leliana did not know the specifics of what happened, but she explained to Evelyn that they also looked into the Remarche family after finding the contract. Leliana obviously didn’t know the specifics, but was able to put two and two together and assumed the contract had been canceled.  
Evelyn held her breath, humiliation showing on her face. “Does anyone else know?” she asked Leliana. It had been hard enough telling Dorian, it embarrassed her know that other people knew about the whole situation. 

“No your worship. My agents are very discreet and I have told no one,” Leliana said, “Have you told anyone?” Leliana could see Evelyn’s embarrassment. In her years in the Chantry and travelling with the Warden, she never really learned how to handle a situation like this and was unsure about how to reassure Evelyn that no one thought the lesser of her for it.

Evelyn nodded. “I told Dorian. After the meeting in the war room when we discussed the ball at Halamshiral. I knew that Philippe was at the Winter Palace and I was hoping we could find any other way of saving the Empress.” 

Leliana thought for a moment. “Your worship, do you want me to make this go away? I don’t think it would be too hard.” She had uncovered a few unsavory secrets about the Remarche family that would be very effective. It wouldn’t be the first time Leliana used someone’s dirty little secrets to get what she needed.

Evelyn shook her head. “It wouldn’t work. My family will never go back on their word. I…I need to think.” She snatched the letter from the floor and stormed out of the room. She practically fell down the stairs in her hurry, not even knowing where she was headed. She stalked through the throne room, the look on her face made people get out of her way. When she got outside, she stopped for a moment, trying to decide what to do next. She didn’t want to be alone, but yet, she did. She needed to hit something, to scream, to cry, but as the Inquisitor, she couldn’t do so in front of anyone. She felt a hand on her shoulder. 

“Cousin”, Dorian said gently. Before she realized what she was doing, Evelyn reeled around, throwing his hand off. In her rage, she barely recognized him. Dorian backed off, looking concerned, but not wanting to crowd her. 

“I have to get out of here. Right. Now,” Evelyn seethed. For the first time since she had gotten it, she felt the anchor in her hand flaring to life. She never used it unless she had to, but her emotions were so out of control she wasn’t sure she could stop it. It was actually beginning to hurt. 

Dorian nodded. “I know just the place,” he said. He took her by the hand and they started walking. Dorian and Evelyn walked out of Skyhold to a small grove he had found nearby. When they reached it, Evelyn stood still and mute, the letter still clenched in her hand. Dorian gently took it from her and started to read. Evelyn had never seen the Tevinter go pale before, but she guessed there was a first time for everything. “Vishante kaffas” Dorian swore. “Is this real?” 

Evelyn nodded. “It arrived this morning- Leliana’s agents saw it and she brought it to me. She’s known about the contract this whole time but ignored it because she didn’t think it was valid anymore.” Evelyn walked away and absentmindedly picked up a stick and stared at it. Suddenly she whirled around and smashed the stick against the nearest tree, and let out a scream. Dorian started towards her, but Evelyn whirled around and hit another tree, breaking the stick in the process. 

“My family.” Evelyn spit out. “They’re so relieved I lived. “DEAREST”. They finally show SOME affection for the first time ever. They barely gave me the time of day when I lived there, except when I was useful to them. Then when I wasn’t, they hid me off in the Chantry. You’re not beautiful enough Evelyn. You had a duty Evelyn. Why can’t you be more like your sisters Evelyn? And now that I’m the Herald, all of the sudden, the marriage is back on? What, did Phillipe suddenly decide I’m good enough, now that people are calling me “Your Worship”? I’m just supposed to submit to what they want for the sake of their status? And then to top it off, I get “most cordially”. No love. No real feelings over the fact that their child survived an explosion that killed hundreds of people. Osborne and Clarissa haven’t even bothered to write. If it weren’t for this stupid thing on my hand and my new abilities, they probably wouldn’t even care that I survived”. Shrieking her frustration and rage, Evelyn punched the tree with her bare hand, splitting her knuckles open in the process. Dorian started forward and encased her bleeding hand in both of his, sending a warm and healing light into it, stopping the bleeding and restoring her split knuckles back the way they were. His tear fell onto their joined hands. He wished he could heal her heart like he could heal her hand. He knew better than anyone what it was like to have a family who wished he was more than he was. 

Dorian still remembered the not too distant past where he and Evelyn met his father in Redcliffe. She had been his steady companion, unwavering in her friendship and support. He saw everything good in her that her own family, aside from Warrick and Charlotte couldn’t seem to, and it broke his heart. He remembered feeling the same way when he found out his own father tried to “cure” him using blood magic. It had shattered him- the man he had once had so much love and respect for, whose approval he yearned for, sold him down the river for the sake of saving face. Now he was watching her go through the same thing. He could see her whole life- Evelyn, wanting nothing more than to please her parents, striving to learn customs strange to her, accepting a life less lived as her duty to her family, only to be rejected until she was needed again. If her parents had been standing in front of them now, it would have taken everything he had to not incinerate them on the spot. He knew that noble families had children mostly to carry on the family name and to further their interest, but he had never seen such an instance of a family treating their child like a tool instead of the treasure that she was. 

Dorian let her continue to rant until she sagged, exhausted into his arms. He sat with her head in his lap, letting her sleep. Even in her sleep, she was restless. He smoothed her hair away from her face and watched her carefully, ready to soothe her if she seemed like she was having a bad dream. A little while later, Iron Bull made his way to the grove and sat down. “Why are you here?” Dorian asked him. 

Bull, his eyes on Evelyn, said “I knew something was up- I saw you leaving, and how upset she looked- wanted to check up on you guys. People are beginning to wonder where you went- it’s been hours. Has she been sleeping long?” 

Dorian shifted a little and stretched as gently as he could. “A while yes. I don’t want to wake her yet. She’s had a shock. I can’t tell you what it is- it’s her story to tell when she is ready, but she needs us to be there as her family.” Dorian himself had come to rely on this group of people as a family of sorts. Maybe they all didn’t see eye to eye, but they had each other’s backs in the long run.

Bull nodded. “I get it. Look- you want me to take her and carry her back? You’ve been sitting a while- you must be pretty stiff by now.” 

Dorian raised his eyes at the double entendre. That great buffoon could make anything dirty. “I don’t want to take her back yet- we came here so she could get her feelings out of her system where others couldn’t see her. Being the Inquisitor weighs on her and she doesn’t want people to see her in a weak moment.” Bull grunted his agreement, and he and Dorian quietly talked a little while longer until Evelyn awoke. The three of them walked back to Skyhold, Bull parting ways with them when they reached it. 

Dorian and Evelyn stood quietly for a few moments. “Thank you”, Evelyn said. “I think I need to go find Cullen and…tell him what’s been happening. He must be worried. And he needs to know.” Dorian knew she was right, and offered to go with her, but she declined. She needed to do this alone.


	6. Chapter Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a shorter chapter- I'm up to writing Chapter 20 currently. When I first started this, I planned on it being just the initial chapter and then swinging right into Halamshiral- but it just kind of took off. It's been a blast to write!

Chapter Six

Evelyn made her way to Cullen’s office- he looked up and smiled in greeting. She smiled back, but then became serious. “I need to talk to you, in private”. Cullen frowned slightly, but nodded and motioned her to the door, holding it open for her. They walked quietly along the battlements for a while, seemingly headed over to the unused tower that was waiting for an upgrade. 

Cullen finally spoke. “Does this have something to do with where you’ve been all day? I’ve been worried.” Evelyn nodded. Cullen sighed. “I thought so. I saw you leave with Dorian. Would you…are you…with him now? Is that what this is about?” His hand went to the back of his neck, rubbing unconsciously. 

“What? NO!” Evelyn quickly assured him. “Cullen, not only is Dorian my distant cousin, he also prefers the company of...um… men. He has been helping me with what I need to tell you about. Coming from a noble family, he is more familiar than anyone about my situation.” 

Cullen heaved a sigh of relief. “Oh… oh. I …see” he said. They continued to walk until they had reached the tower and headed inside. There were a few chairs in there to sit on, so Evelyn bade Cullen to sit. She put a chair in front of his and took his hands, took a breath and began to tell her story. She started with her childhood, her lessons, how her parents treated her, the arranged marriage, the humiliation of being left at the altar, all the way through to what happened earlier in the day. She showed him the letter that her mother had sent. 

Cullen had been aware that there had been some family issues- distant cousins suddenly coming out of the woodwork to claim kinship with the previously barely paid attention to Evelyn. In spite of the fact that these cousins had caused trouble, Evelyn had still offered aid out of a sense of family duty, only to have them turn around and start scandalous rumors. Cullen could not understand how Evelyn had turned out so lovely and caring coming from the background she did. 

Cullen stayed silent, as Evelyn watched him carefully, willing him to speak. She was worried that this news would be too much for their burgeoning relationship. She had grown to care for Cullen very deeply, and she had hoped for a chance to let that caring grow into love. Did this whole sordid affair ruin her chances? “Please, say something,” she pleaded. She stood up and started pacing around the room- if she sat still any longer waiting for a response, she thought she would fall apart. Cullen got up and walked over to her, stopping her pacing by putting his hands on her upper arms, rubbing his hands up and down to warm her. He didn’t know what to say to this. Growing up in Honnleath and then spending his life shut away as a Templar did not give him any experience in matters such as this. 

“Please, don’t take my silence to mean that I am angry, or that my feelings for you have changed,” he said. “Nothing could be further from the truth. I... just don’t know what to do. What do you want to do?” he asked. Hearing her story broke his heart. While his life had its rough times, he at least had grown up in a loving family who had put his desire to be a Templar about their own hopes for him. She had been starting to come into her own lately- he hoped that she wasn’t going to start doubting herself, or think about going back to her parents.

Evelyn looked up at him. “Before the Inquisition, I always planned to do what my family wanted, whether that meant an arranged marriage, life in the Chantry, reduced to a scullery maid in the family kitchens, whatever Mother and Father declared. I knew no other way. Now, I have this,” she held up her glowing hand. “It changed everything about my life. Made me bigger than I was. Better I guess. 

Cullen stopped her. “You don’t need the anchor to show you are a better person.” He gently touched her face. “I saw it when I met you. You have strength, purpose, wisdom. You took the mark and used it without hesitating to think of what it could do to you. You could have refused. You could even have run off to die instead of trying to save the world. I don’t know how to make you realize how special you are, not only to me, but to everyone you have touched here.” Cullen gathered her in his arms. “I don’t know what will happen, but know that I am not going anywhere.”

Evelyn wrapped her arms around Cullen and they stood quietly enjoying each other’s embrace and warmth. “We will figure this out” Cullen assured. He pulled away to look into her eyes before bringing his lips to hers.


	7. Chapter Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another short one. I've noticed that the chapters are getting shorter- not sure why. I'll have to work on that.

Chapter Seven  
Later that evening, Evelyn and Cullen sat at the war table with Dorian, Josephine and Leliana, discussing their options. “There is only one option,” Cullen declared. “Simply tell them no and be done with it.” 

“It’s not that simple Commander.” Said Josephine. “There is a contract, an agreement. Names and reputations are on the line. Both families will lose face if an accord is not reached. That could hurt the Inquisition in the long run.” 

“But what about the fact that he broke the contract first?” Evelyn questioned. “He didn’t show up to the wedding, running off like a spoiled child. Wouldn’t that null the contract?”.   
Josephine thought a moment. “Of course, I would have to verify this through the proper channels, but because your family never officially declared the contract null, it remains valid. From what I understand, they had hoped that Phillipe would eventually see reason and honor their end of the contract. They stowed you in the Chantry to keep you er…uncompromised just in case.” 

Evelyn stared at Josephine, unbelieving. “You mean, I could have maybe had a normal life if my parents had cancelled the contract? Marriage, children, a home?” She slumped down in her chair, defeated. She had no words for this. Looking at Cullen, she knew that she could not go forward with the arrangement and she no longer desired the approval of her family. Even though Cullen and Evelyn’s feelings for each other were strong, she knew that they were just in the beginning stages of getting to know each other. But even so, to know that there could be a marriage built from love instead of duty in her future, made her more desperate to put a stop to the contract and the marriage. She didn’t even know if she was going to live through her fight with Corypheus, but she knew that if she did, she wanted to be able to have the life she wanted. She had earned it.  
She stood up abruptly, looking at each in turn. “There will be no marriage. Reputation, status, names, land be damned.” Cullen, Leliana and Dorian smiled.   
Josephine, looking concerned, nodded. “I understand Inquisitor. I will start looking into our options at once.”

They left the war room, Cullen and Evelyn hand in hand. Dorian suggested carrying on to the Herald’s Rest to blow off some steam. Cullen’s hand tightened around Evelyn’s- there was no way he was going to part from her right now. This sweet and brave woman, HIS sweet and brave woman. He could see a future with her, if they lived through this war. She looked at him and smiled, squeezing his hand in return. Together, they followed Dorian into the tavern. Eventually, almost all of the companions had made their way over, even Solas came in to have a glass of wine. After this emotion-riddled day, Evelyn was glad to be able to relax. She gazed at her friends, her family, and raised a toast to the Inquisition. In return, the usually casual toast to the health of the Inquisitor had turned into a loud roar in her name.


	8. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight

The next morning, Cullen came up to Evelyn’s room to find her composing a letter at her desk. There were several scrolls started and crossed out littering the floor, Cullen noted with amusement. Evelyn looked up at him. “I just can’t seem to get it right,” she sighed. “How do you tell your parents that your duty to your family no longer means anything?” 

Cullen smiled and came around to lean on the desk. “I’d help you if I could. I just came up to check on you and see if you needed anything. You look tired.” Cullen knew that he was lucky to have parents who loved him, and he felt for Evelyn. He didn’t think he would be able to help her write the letter, but he just wanted to be there to support her.

Evelyn got up from her desk and came to put her arms around Cullen, resting her head on his shoulder. “This helps a lot, even if it doesn’t help me focus very much.” 

Cullen pulled her closer. “I shouldn’t distract you. Why don’t you come and see me later when you are done. I want to talk to you about something.” 

Evelyn kissed him and nodded. “I’d rather you stay and distract me”. She kissed him again, running her fingers through his hair. She wished she could keep him here with her all day, just the two of them. They didn’t get to spend a lot of time together, and she was hoping they could change that sometime soon.

Cullen, busy kissing along her jawline chuckled. “Me too, but I have duties that need to be taken care of.” Reluctantly, they parted. Cullen blew her a kiss as he left. As he made his way down the stairs, his mind was on his lady upstairs. He was about six years older than Evelyn, but he had spent his life from the age of thirteen as a Templar. Aside from a few post battle dalliances with female Templars, he had not had any type of relationship with a woman at all. He was having a hard time being separated from her, but he keenly felt his duty to the Inquisition. In fact, since their relationship started, he felt even more determined to make the Inquisition a success- for her. Now it was a matter of learning how to balance their feelings for each other with their duties- a discussion they should consider having, maybe after this arranged marriage nonsense was dealt with. Until then, he was hoping she would consider accompanying him to Fereldan so they could spend some quiet time together before heading to the Winter Palace. 

Upstairs, Evelyn was still working on the letter to her family, while trying to keep her mind off Cullen. No one had ever shown any interest in her before, and she was beginning to suspect, based off of some of her chats with Cullen, that Dorian had been right- Cullen had been interested in her before Dorian and Vivienne had gotten their hands on her. She still found it hard to believe that this handsome, wonderful man found her attractive and wanted to spend time with her. Shaking her head, she tried to keep her mind on her task.

Dear Father and Mother,  
I received your letter. I too wish I could have been at Charlotte’s memorial service. We had grown closer in our years together at the Chantry. I wish I could have saved her.   
I recall you ending your letter with our family motto “Modest in temper, bold in deed”. Taking our motto to heart, I must tell you that I have no intentions of honoring the marriage arrangement with Phillipe Remarche. When I was sixteen, there was nothing I would not have done to please you, even agreeing to an arranged marriage that would have sentenced me to a life of a servant forever.   
Now, I have a terrible responsibility that may claim my life. I have been given a new lease on life- not sentenced to an arranged marriage or the Chantry, and I choose to spend the time I have left with the life I wish to lead.   
If I survive my mission, I do not plan to return to the Chantry at Ostwick, nor will I be returning home either. I know this may put you in a difficult position with the Remarches, but if the contract had been cancelled when Phillipe abandoned me, this would not be an issue.  
Love,  
Evelyn.

She stared at the letter for a half hour. She knew that if she sent it, there was a good possibility she would never see them again. But faced with the choices in her future, it was a risk she was going to have to take. She took it to Dorian, who read it over. She could see the sadness in his face as he read it. “Cousin, I wish it wouldn’t have to come to this. I know firsthand what it is like to lose your family, and I would not wish it on anyone. But, I agree that this is what it is going to have to come to. It will be up to your family to make the choice.” Evelyn took the letter to Leliana to be sent immediately.

Later that evening, Evelyn made her way to Cullen’s office. Cullen looked up. “There you are,” he said smiling. 

Evelyn smiled back “You were waiting for me?” she asked. 

“Yes… I mean no” Cullen responded. 

“I… can come back later if you prefer,” Evelyn said, edging toward the door. 

“No, please stay,” Cullen said quickly. “We have some dealings in Fereldan. I was hoping you might accompany me, when you can spare the time of course.” 

“Is something wrong?” Evelyn asked. She didn’t want to get her hopes up- they had left things so well this morning. Had something changed?

“What? NO!” Cullen exclaimed. I…would rather explain there…if you wish to go.” 

Evelyn smiled. “I believe there’s time now.” She said. They had not made any arrangements to go anywhere at the moment- everyone needed a rest before heading out again. She also did not want to sit around waiting for another letter.

Cullen nodded “I’ll make the necessary arrangements.” They arranged to leave the next morning.

As they rode together on the way to Fereldan, their mutual shyness and apprehension gave way to conversation. Evelyn found how much she truly enjoyed spending time with Cullen. They didn’t feel the need to talk all the time- and spent a lot of time just riding in companionable silence. It was nice to relax and get away for a while, and she knew it was for Cullen too. He had admitted to her shortly after they first kissed that he had chosen to stop taking lyrium. She did not know much about lyrium addiction, but she saw how it was affecting him, and she was very worried for him. She hoped that this short trip would provide a distraction for him. 

After Cullen had taken care of his business, he escorted Evelyn down by a lake. “Where are we?” Evelyn asked, as she looked around at the lake.   
“  
You walk into danger every day”, Cullen replied. “I wanted to take you away from that, if only for a moment. I grew up not far from here, this place was always quiet”. 

“Did you come here often?” Evelyn asked. She was fascinated by his childhood stories and always wanted to hear more. Even though his childhood wasn’t glamorous, it was a childhood she hoped she would be able to provide for her children, if she was lucky enough to have any.

“I loved my siblings, but they were very loud,” Cullen replied. “I would come here to clear my head. Of course, they always found me eventually.” 

Evelyn took his hand. “You were happy here?” she asked. 

“I was.” Cullen said. “I still am.” Especially being here with you…he thought to himself. Maybe when this war was over…

“While we’re here, you have me all to yourself.” Evelyn said shyly. 

“The thought may have crossed my mind” Cullen returned. He paused, looking thoughtful. He was apprehensive- he wanted to do something special for her, to show her how much she meant to him, but he was afraid she would find it corny

“The last time I was here was the day I left for Templar training,” Cullen continued. “My brother gave me this,” as he held up a silver coin. “It just happened to be in his pocket, but he said it was for luck. Templars aren’t supposed to carry such things- our faith should see us through.” 

Evelyn looked at Cullen. “A little luck can’t hurt every now and then.” she said. 

Cullen chuckled “I suppose not. I should have died during the blight, or at Kirkwall, or at Haven. Take your pick, yet, I made it back here.” Cullen put the coin in Evelyn’s hand. “Humor me”, he said, “you don’t know what you’ll face before the end. This can’t hurt” he whispered, looking deep into Evelyn’s eyes. 

Evelyn’s fingers curled around the coin, and Cullen’s hand. “I’ll keep it safe” she promised. Even though it was only a coin, she was truly touched by his gift. She knew she would carry it with her all the time.

Relieved, Cullen’s arm went around her waist and drew her close. “Good,” Cullen breathed. “I know it’s foolish…but I’m glad.” Evelyn’s arms went around Cullen as he kissed her.


	9. Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine  
Upon their return to Skyhold, they found the castle in an uproar. A trip to the war room showed that trebuchets had been delivered and were readied for Adamant Fortress. It seemed like so long ago, but only the week before the war room discussion about Halamshiral, Evelyn had met Hawke and Stroud in Crestwood and made their way to the Western Approach to confront the Wardens and Lord Erimond. Evelyn knew this would be the first true test of their full military capacity, but she worried about the loss of lives ahead of them.

They left almost immediately for Adamant Fortress- Evelyn barely had time to gather everything she needed before they were off. They arrived to find the trebuchets at work. Cullen’s army wasted no time getting to business, breaching the battlements and breaking down the front gates. 

Cullen watched Evelyn enter the Fortress, and directed her to help at the battlements on her way, promising to keep the soldiers safe. As they fought their way through, he heard down the line from soldiers coming through that Evelyn and her companions had made it through and had found Clarel and Erimond. Then with horror, he saw the green lights, and then the dragon. Then hearing the horrifying crash of the bridge, he felt his heart stop. As the bridge collapsed, he watched the dragon fly off and wasting no more time, ran into the fortress, fighting his way through to where everyone was gathered. He found Erimond lying unconscious and had him taken into custody. There was no sign of Evelyn. He watched the wardens help fight the demons, taking them out with abandon. Suddenly, in a burst of light, Evelyn appeared, on her hands and knees. She slowly stood up, holding out her glowing hand. As she clenched her fist, every demon was sucked into the void, leaving only warriors and wardens behind. As the cheers went up, and as Stroud stood by, Evelyn spoke of Hawke’s sacrifice, and recruited the Grey Wardens to help the Inquisition. Cullen watched Evelyn carefully as she spoke, seeing the shadows under her eyes, and her shoulders sagging with weariness, but she stood strong until the end. As the Wardens disbursed with a staggering Stroud leading them, and as the soldiers fanned out to check for survivors and wounded, he watched Evelyn stagger to her knees. Her companions sagged to the ground as well, clearly exhausted. He hurried to help Evelyn, directing soldiers to help Varric, Solas and Cassandra to their feet. They camped at the Fortress for the evening- Cullen helped Evelyn to a sleeping area out of the way. As tired as she was, she could not sleep. She told Cullen what happened, entering the fade, fighting their way through, Divine Justinia, regaining her memory of what happened at the Conclave, and the final fight with the demon, and the loss of Hawke. After she finished her story, she lay with Cullen, but could not sleep. Cullen dozed, but his concern for Evelyn kept him from deep sleep. He held her close, willing her to be able to find some peace as she finally drifted off.

In the night, Evelyn woke up screaming. Half out of her mind, she jumped out of bed, her anchor flaring to life. Cullen frantically tried to get to her, wrapping his arms around her and holding her down. Tears ran down her face as she hyperventilated, trying to remember where she was. Reliving the Conclave memories, and losing Hawke, and the giant spider-like demon flashed before her eyes over and over. Cullen pulled her back to bed and held her in his arms as she sobbed in terror. He heard someone coming toward them and saw Solas run into the room and looked at Evelyn. Cullen turned to Solas in terror. “Can you help her?” he asked Solas desperately.

Solas approached Evelyn and took her head between his hands. Her head was shaking back and forth, eyes unfocused and filled with fear. She couldn’t catch her breath. Solas touched his forehead to hers. “Lethallan”, he said. “Come back”. He kept his forehead to hers, sending calming thoughts to her troubled mind, willing the nightmares to quiet. After a while, Evelyn finally started to calm. 

Cullen kept her tight in his arms, kissing her on the top of her head. “Please come back to me love,” he said. He knew a thing or two about bad dreams, but he had never experienced anything like this. As Evelyn settled down, his attention turned to Solas. “How did you know?” he asked him.

Solas replied, keeping his forehead to Evelyn’s, “I could feel it in my dream. I felt her fear and knew she was having trouble getting out.” Solas knew that Evelyn had walked in the fade twice, which was astounding, and rare. He wasn’t certain that what he did would work, but he had to try. “I don’t know how often this will happen to her. I will start looking into it immediately to see if I can find something to help.” He let her go and stood up. “She should be calming significantly. Try to get her back to sleep if possible. I think she’ll be all right for the rest of the evening. If not, I will know.” Solas headed back to bed. 

Cullen gently wiped Evelyn’s brow, feeling her settle down against him. After a while, her breathing evened out and her eyes fluttered open. She looked up to see Cullen looking down at her, concern etched all over his face. “What happened?” she asked. She sat up, shaking her head. She staggered to her feet and walked over to the wall. Cullen got up and followed her, putting his hands on her shoulders. Evelyn turned around and embraced him. “I’m sorry,” she said, resting her head on his chest. Cullen just smiled as he led her back to bed, holding her and watching over her until morning.

A few fitful hours later, after making sure the fortress was secure, the Inquisition headed back to Skyhold. Evelyn barely slept at all on the way home. She kept reliving her time in the fade and thinking about losing Hawke. Varric slept very little as well, and Evelyn spent most of her time watching out for him, making sure he ate, and got some rest. What little time she had left, she spent with Solas, trying to make sense of what happened to her. At night, as they made camp, she would lay with Cullen, trying to get some rest. Even though she felt safe and comfortable in his arms, sleep eluded her for the rest of the trip. They finally made it back to Skyhold, ready to have a rest. Cullen and Evelyn went to the war table to discuss what happened with Josephine and Leliana, and also to discuss Halamshiral. It was decided they would leave in a week for the Palace. 

The next day, Evelyn made the rounds to see all of her companions, spending extra time with Varric before stopping to see Cullen. He was not in his office- one of his runners told her he was with Cassandra. She found them arguing about continuing his leadership in the face of his troubles. He stormed out, apologizing as she came into the room. Evelyn knew that Cullen had asked Cassandra to watch over him and to remove him from his duties if the lyrium withdrawals became evident, and she also knew that if that happened, it would tear Cullen apart. Cullen had not spoken of what happened to him, but she knew that whatever had happened had affected him deeply for a long time, and she also knew that the lyrium withdrawals he was experiencing could be torture. She knew that she had to find Cullen and try to talk him down. Evelyn did not know much about lyrium withdrawal, aside from what she had learned from various sources after Cullen first confessed his lyrium problem. What she had learned made her blood run cold. If Cullen kept taking lyrium, it would eventually lead to dementia, paranoia, inability to tell fantasy from reality, and possibly even death, and as far as Evelyn could tell, there was no real cure or treatment. Cullen had chosen to quit cold turkey, and while that worried her, his taking lyrium again worried her more. She left Cassandra to find Cullen immediately.

As she walked into his office, she heard him bellow in frustration and jumped back as a wooden box flew past her head and hit the wall. Cullen started “Maker’s Breath! I didn’t hear you enter. I…forgive me,” he said despondently. In his delirium, he had almost hurt this sweet woman before him. Filled with self-loathing, and half mad from the pain, it was all he could do to stay standing.

“Cullen, if you need to talk…” Evelyn started. She could see how much pain he was in, and as he half collapsed against his desk, she rushed to help him. She knew there was nothing she could do for him and she felt helpless.

“You don’t have to” Cullen groaned as the pain flared up. “I never meant for this to interfere.” He leaned against the desk for a moment trying to gather his thoughts and focus on calming the pain. 

Evelyn didn’t know how to begin to help, asking “Are you going to be alright?” She mentally kicked herself for asking such a stupid question.

Cullen didn’t know how to answer, but he knew that it was time to tell Evelyn about what had happened to him at the Circle and in Kirkwall. She had been so open with him about her life and the troubles she was facing, he felt that she deserved the same from him, especially if they were going to continue with their relationship. Cullen told her of the abominations at the Circle, his friends slaughtered, being tortured for days, his time in Kirkwall during the mage rebellion, the Knight Commander and her madness. He couldn’t help but rant against himself betraying the Inquisition, finally punching the bookcase in his rage. His desperation and need for the lyrium was beginning to overshadow his determination to overcome his addiction. 

“This doesn’t have to be about the Inquisition. Is this what you want?” Evelyn was honestly frightened by his angry display. She wanted to gather him in her arms and hold him until the pain went away, but she didn’t know if he would accept it. While she knew that his anger was directed inward, she was afraid he would lash out at her if she touched him. She wasn’t afraid that he would hurt her, she faced worse almost every day, but if he did accidently hurt her it could drive a wedge between them. She tensed as his clenched fist rested on the bookcase.

Cullen breathed out and seemed to collect himself, his fist finally relaxing. “No. But these memories have always haunted me. If they become worse, if I cannot endure this...”

Evelyn put her hand on Cullen’s chest, trying to put all of her feelings for him into that gesture. She wanted him to know that she had his back and would not abandon him. “You can,” she said reassuringly. 

Cullen exhaled and leaned into her hand as it rested on him. “All right.” He stepped away from her, rubbing the back of his neck, trying to gather himself into some semblance of sanity

Evelyn could see that he needed some space, so she excused herself to tend to other matters. She knew that he was going to be in for a rough night however, and she knew she couldn’t let him suffer alone. She went back to Cassandra and questioned her about withdrawal and anything she may know about how to help reduce the symptoms. After Cassandra, she went to the healers, including hunting down Stitches in the Herald’s Rest and talked to them as well. She spent some time gathering items she needed- cloth, water, tea, and some herbal cuttings, among other items. 

Later that evening, Evelyn went back to Cullen’s office and found him lying restlessly in his bed. His sheets were soaked with sweat and she could see that he was aching. Following the advice of Cassandra and the healers, she made poultices to put on his arms, legs and neck to ease the pain and placed cool cloths on him to cool him down. As she treated him, she could see that he was not truly there, lost in his pain and withdrawal and nightmares. Evelyn sat with him the entire night, soothing him from his nightmares, treating his aches and pains, feeding him sips of tea and water as he needed it. Her heart ached for him, more now after hearing his story. She didn’t know if he was aware that she was there at all, but that didn’t bother her. She had a feeling that he would be embarrassed if he realized that she had stayed with him that night, and she didn’t want him to feel obliged to her. She watched him as he slept fitfully, brushing his hair back, rubbing his shoulders and arms. Finally, he calmed down into a more restful sleep, much to Evelyn’s relief. She stayed for another hour to ensure he was resting comfortably, and then quietly packed her things and went down the ladder. After leaving some food on his desk, she went back to her quarters to get a little rest.


	10. Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten  
The next morning, Evelyn found Cullen on the battlements, looking considerably better. After his assurances that he was indeed recovering, they talked for a while. Evelyn was surprised to find out that he had never told anyone about what had happened to him, and she was grateful that he had chosen her to hear the story. Evelyn caught Cullen’s hand and held it as they talked, wanting him to know that she was not going anywhere. When he asked how she was feeling, she was truly touched. Even after all of his pain and rage, he still thought of her. Why he thought he was letting the Inquisition down was beyond her. To Evelyn, Cullen was the heart of the Inquisition- always working, giving everything he had, supporting her, even when she chose to recruit the mages. She knew that she loved him, but was too timid to say it.

As they walked and talked, Evelyn happened to look down to the courtyard and stood stock still. Two men, a Templar and a noble, had arrived, and were walking towards the Main hall. With a tremor in her voice, Evelyn breathed, “Oh Maker. It’s Osborne and Warrick.” Evelyn was so shocked she started hyperventilating and had to sit down. She hadn’t seen Warrick in over 12 years, but she recognized him immediately. “What are they doing here?” she breathed. 

Cullen kneeled down by Evelyn’s side. He was concerned too- he knew that she had sent the letter to her parents about the marriage contract, and was worried that they were here to change her mind. “We’d better get over there,” he said, “Just focus on the reunion first. We can worry about the rest later”.

Trembling, Evelyn nodded. As they headed to the Main Hall, Evelyn quickened her pace. She had never been very close with Osborne- he was 10 years older than her, and he never had much time for her. He had been kind, but the combination of age gap and family duties never allowed them much time to bond. Warrick, on the other hand, had been a childhood playmate. He was only a year older than her, and had always been protective of her, sneaking her treats while she studied and playing pranks on her tutors whenever they were particularly cruel to her. When they had taken him to the Templars at the age of twelve, Evelyn was devastated. Aside from occasional letters, she hadn’t heard much from him over the years and she missed him terribly. 

Before they reached the entrance, Evelyn stopped to compose herself. All of her life, Evelyn had been quiet and shy, a true shrinking violet. Becoming the Herald of Andraste had slowly been changing her. She had gone from a shy young woman hiding behind the Chantry to the head of the Inquisition. Traveling with her amazingly different companions, all of whom had taught her different pieces of herself, and the tender ministrations of Dorian, Vivienne and Chana had turned her into a stronger and braver person, and Cullen’s interest in her hadn’t hurt either. She just hoped she could remember that when she faced off against her brothers.

Cullen came up behind her and put his arms around her. He held her close for a moment. “You can do this, I’ll be right behind you” he murmured in her ear, before letting her go. Evelyn gave him a smile and a look of gratitude and entered the Main Hall.

As she entered, Osborne was speaking with Josephine. “I’m here for my sister Evelyn,” he told her, somewhat imperiously. “I would also like to see Mother Giselle as well.” Evelyn hesitated and looked at her brothers. Osborne had grown so distinguished looking since she had last seen him- a younger version of their father. Warrick, oh. Warrick. He had grown so strong and handsome in the years since he had left. In his Templar armor, he struck such an imposing figure, it brought tears to her eyes. She had missed him so much, and thanked the Maker every day that he had not been at the Conclave. 

She quietly came up behind them. “My brothers,” she said tearily, her voice breaking. Warrick whirled around and with a grin, ran to his sister, grabbed her up and swung her around. They embraced for a long time, Evelyn clinging to him with tears running down her face. Osborne approached her and gave her a hug- it was a little more formal, but she could tell he was glad to see her as well. Evelyn introduced Josephine and Cullen to her brothers and offered to take them on a tour of her Skyhold. Linking her arm through Warrick’s, she led the way. 

They made the rounds all over Skyhold from the library to the Herald’s Rest to the stables. Evelyn had sort of neglected to warn them in advance about her favorite mount, the Bog Unicorn, who had come trotting up to Evelyn looking for nuzzle and petting. Osborne paled visibly when he saw the “unicorn” and stayed well away from it, which amused Warrick greatly. Evelyn felt Warrick’s eyes on her as she showed them her home, proud and confident. As she introduced her brothers to her companions, she had become more outgoing, and even funny. They ended up back at the Herald’s Rest listening to Bull give a blow by blow account of their first dragon fight. Evelyn hid her head in her hands as Bull went on “You should have seen her. That dragon launched her twenty feet away- she gets up, yelling and throws a dagger right in its eye! Damndest thing I ever saw.” Bull slaps his knee, guffawing. “I knew she was tough, but that day, she became my little badass!” he said, clapping Evelyn on the back. 

Osborne looked at Bull with disbelief. “Are you saying that Evelyn fought a dragon and won?” Evelyn could understand Osborne’s doubt. She hadn’t even so much as looked at a dagger until Clancy had worked with her. She still remembered the first time she watched Clancy throw daggers at a target, hitting the bullseye every time- how envious she was. Clancy smiled, put the dagger in her hand and showed her how to throw it. By the fifth toss, she had hit the bullseye, giving her a little thrill that she took to it so quickly. Within a few weeks, she had a deadly accuracy that surpassed Clancy, and was also picking locks so quickly you could barely see her do it. Even though these skills had given her a renewed sense of self definition, it had done little to give her confidence. Even when the Revered Mother had asked Evelyn to accompany her to the Conclave as a bodyguard and another set of ears, she remained quiet and shy, preferring to remain in the shadows. 

Bull laughed. “Yup. That’s nothing. I swear our girl is unstoppable. She’s developed quite the attitude since Haven”. Evelyn blushed, but looked at Bull affectionately. They spent a little more time swapping stories- Warrick told a hilarious one about a Templar recruit who accidentally set fire to his own armor. Osborne remained quiet through most of the visit, watching Evelyn appraisingly, glancing at her different companions, eyes resting on Cullen occasionally. Even though Cullen had kept a respectful distance from Evelyn during the tour and visit, Osborne noticed how he watched her and he wondered what there was behind it.

Finally, the crowd dispersed. Evelyn, Warrick and Osborne walked outside with Cullen and Josephine. Warrick looked around again and turned to Evelyn, beaming. “Well Little Bit, you certainly have some place here.” Evelyn smiled. Showing them around first was probably the best thing she could have done. It gave her the upper hand in the event that Osborne was here to collect her and bring her home.

Evelyn knew she shouldn’t put it off, so she invited Osborne and Warrick to the War room to talk with her and her advisors. At Osborne’s request, Mother Giselle had arrived as well. Osborne cut to the chase as soon as everyone had arrived. “Evelyn, I think that we should probably keep this to just family and the Mother Giselle...” Evelyn gave him an even look and shook her head. Fine, they stayed. “Well then, you must know why we are here. Father sent Warrick and me to collect you, or at least to talk some sense into you. Looking around, I see that it is not wise to bring you home. Mother and Father don’t realize the true extent of what is happening I think- I didn’t either until I saw it for myself as I travelled here. But, there is no reason that Phillipe cannot come here to live with you until this is over. In fact, he has expressed that he would be happy to come here, provided all of his creature comforts are provided for.”

Evelyn stopped him there. “Creature comforts?” She laughed. “Osborne, I know that Mother and Father have put you in a difficult position, so I’ll try to be kind. You weren’t there the day Phillipe left. Mother and Father and Monsieur Remarche sat me in a chair and questioned me for hours about what I said or what I did to scare Phillipe away. HOURS Osborne. Because apparently, it wasn’t just my lack of beauty that was the problem, I must have been defective in some other way. I sat in that chair, barely able to breathe in that infernal wedding dress and corset- no food, no drink.”

Osborne was quiet, watching his youngest sister as she ranted. Warrick got up and stood at the table, watching her intently. They hadn’t known. All Osborne remembered was his father, in a temper, saying that the marriage was off for now, but refusing to elaborate. Mother wrote letter after letter to the Remarches, trying to re-establish a connection. He knew Evelyn had been sent off to the Chantry, but Father had forbade him from going to see her. Osborne has been led to believe that Evelyn had done something so heinous that forgiveness was never to be had. Looking back, he had found that hard to believe at the time because she had always been so quiet and good. 

Evelyn continued, “Finally, when they had said and done enough, Mother and Father marched me home and put me in the Chantry, without another word, except the occasional letter to remind me why I was there, and to tell me of Phillipe’s whereabouts. If it weren’t for Clancy and Charlotte, I would probably have killed myself. And then, Clancy and Charlotte died, along with our Revered Mother and all of the Chantry sisters.” She stopped for a moment, breath hitching. She refused to cry in front of Osborne. She caught Cullen’s eye and he nodded slightly, encouraging her to go on.

“If Mother and Father think, after everything that has happened to me, that I am going to settle for marrying Phillipe Remarche, then they are in for a big surprise. He is NOTHING. A grasping little social climber who wouldn’t bother with me until I became someone important. Do Mother and Father even know what I have gone through? You say that they don’t have a grasp on the situation- which I can see. They are so caught up in their own social status and what they can get from people that they haven’t stopped to look at what is going on in this world.”

Osborne swallowed and shifted uncomfortably in his chair. “Now that we have seen your Skyhold, maybe I need to hear what has happened to you. We haven’t had a lot of news, or if we had, Father has disregarded it. All I know is that the Conclave exploded, there is a rift in the sky, and that people think you can fix it because you were the only survivor. We heard something about an avalanche at Haven, but stories get so distorted on the way to Ostwick.” 

Mother Giselle, who had sat quietly observing everyone interrupted. “Perhaps, Ser Trevelyan, you asked me to be here as an intermediary in this discussion. I was only made aware of the situation by Sister Nightingale as we walked here, but I think that there is no need for us to be here. It seems your parents kept you in the dark about your sister, and you need to sit down and talk without outside influence. I suggest that I and the advisors take our leave so you can talk as a family.” 

Osborne thought for a moment and looked searchingly at both Warrick and Evelyn. He had a feeling that he was in for an interesting talk. He nodded his assent at Mother Giselle and the others took their leave, Cullen briefly squeezing Evelyn’s shoulder as he left. As they settled in, Evelyn began to tell her story. She told them about waking up in a cell at Haven with a glowing hand, how Solas discovered that she could close the rifts and stop the demons from coming through. She told them about her time at Haven, finding her advisors and companions one by one, then almost losing them when Samson and Corypheus attacked and utterly destroyed their home. Warrick visibly flinched when Evelyn told them about Corypheus holding her in the air by her arm as if she were a toy, and he put his head in his hands as she told of the entire mountain falling on her, and her travels through the snow and ice for hours to find her people, nearly dying again in the process. She carried on with finding Skyhold, finding Hawke and Stroud, who told her about the Grey Wardens, their recent fight at Adamant and going into the Fade and fighting their way out, losing Hawke along the way. 

When she had finished, Osborne stayed silent for a moment. Evelyn looked at him. “You don’t need to say anything right now Brother. Come, let’s have some dinner and arrange a place for you to stay the night. There is plenty of room for you and your guards.” Josephine had arranged for a banquet in the main hall, and had purposefully put Osborne and Warrick near the more talkative members of the Inquisition so that Evelyn’s story could be corroborated. Evelyn watched this from her place at the table, marveling at Josephine’s skills. Evelyn didn’t know how Josephine could have anticipated this, and made sure to thank her for it later. 

Later that evening, Evelyn went to check on Cullen. She was worried that Cullen would have another withdrawal episode because of the stress brought on by today and wanted to be on hand in case he needed her. She found him working at his desk, and he smiled as she approached. She told him what had happened in the war room after the left, expressing her hope that Osborne would believe her and take her side with Father. Cullen took her by the hand, and they left to take a walk around the battlements. As they walked, he put his arm around her and held her close. They talked about everything and nothing at the same time, just relishing the closeness they had grown to share. They stopped in again at the Herald’s Rest and had a few with Bull, Varric and Dorian before Cullen reminded Evelyn that she did have some official business to take care of in the morning, as Erimond and an Avvar were waiting in the cells for judgement. Cullen escorted Evelyn back to the door of her quarters. 

He started to leave, but stopped and turned. “May I…stay with you this evening?” he asked her uncertainly. Evelyn flushed nervously. Cullen hurriedly continued “Nothing has to happen, I just want to hold you. I know… I mean…Maker blast it all, I don’t know what to say. You were there for me last evening. I want to be there for you. After how I was yesterday and your brother’s arriving today, I was worried for you, even though I knew that you were strong enough to stand up to your family. Your coming to see me after was a big relief. I just want to be there for you too.”

Evelyn smiled shyly. She hadn’t realized that Cullen knew she stayed with him last night. She took him by the hand and led him upstairs.


	11. Chapter Eleven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still continuing- I'm up to over 20 chapters now I think- but I think it will be winding up soon. I've been reading a lot of different Dragon Age and Mass Effect fics- some short, some really really long, and I think I need to learn to be more descriptive and take my time a bit more in the story. I don't know if I will master that by the end of this story- but maybe on the next one- thinking of tackling something with Alistair next.

Chapter Eleven  
The next day, Osborne and Warrick came in to the Main Hall for breakfast to find a lot of activity. They had gotten the impression that Evelyn had a lot of responsibility as the Inquisitor, but they didn’t realize that she held the fate of criminals in her hands as well. After a quick meal, the tables were cleared away and the guards brought in the first of two judgements.

The first was an Avvar warrior who had been caught throwing goats at the castle. When asked why, the Avvar claimed it was in retribution for the killing of his son in the Fallow Mire, and that he had no further argument with the Inquisition as he knew his son was an idiot. Warrick was amused that Evelyn’s handling of the situation as she sent him and his tribe to Tevinter with as many weapons as they could carry. Everyone watching got a laugh from this, including the Avvar warrior. He promised to do his best as he was set free.

The second trial was much more serious. Lord Erimond was to be tried for his actions against the Grey Wardens, leading them away and perverting their purpose with a fake “calling”. He stood in front of Evelyn pompously denouncing the Inquisition and declaring that he welcomed death, that it would only make him greater. 

Evelyn struggled to come to a decision, but did not want her indecision to show, especially to Erimond. She did not have a lot of choices in this. She could lock him in prison, give him to the Wardens, or kill him. She didn’t think he would be a great subject for interrogation, given his arrogance, especially because Evelyn did not approve of torture. Even though she took a lot of lives, she was reluctant to kill him. She knew she had to make a decision quickly, as all eyes were on her. Her eyes met Blackwall’s. As a Grey Warden, she wanted to see what his opinion was. He drew his hand across his throat, making his feelings clear. She didn’t want to send Erimond to the Wardens in case he brought them under his influence again. 

She looked at Erimond again, who was standing there as if he wasn’t in irons. His actions led to the death or Warden Commander Clarel, countless other Grey Wardens who had either died at Adamant or were sacrificed for the demon binding. It eventually led to the death of Hawke. She looked at Varric, who was standing in his usual place, stone-faced. Still struggling with the loss of his best friend, he looked at her and shook his head.

She sentenced Erimond to death, by her own hand. If she thought it would have helped, she would have allowed Varric or Blackwall to carry out the sentence, but she knew it was best if she did it. As the hearings adjourned, everyone went outside to watch Erimond’s execution. As Evelyn approached the scaffold, Warrick and Osborne held their breath. Their little sister, sweet Little Bit was going to execute this man in front of them. As she brought the sword down on his neck, the look of rage on her face shocked them. As the crowd dispersed they went to go find her.

They found Evelyn sitting by the fire in her quarters, tears in her eyes. She looked up as they approached. “I’m sorry you had to see that. Feelings were so raw, and people needed closure. Erimond was beyond redemption and I wasn’t sure what he would do to the Wardens again if I turned him over to them. It was the best I could give them.” Warrick remained quiet. He had been thinking all night about Evelyn’s story, barely sleeping at all. As childhood playmates, they had sometimes played war, and they had sometimes played dolls. Evelyn had been such a gentle soul, crying if Warrick so much as stepped on a bug. It killed him to see how she had been forced to change, how it affected her.

Osborne waved away her apology. “You do what you have to in times of war Evelyn. It’s part of the cycle,” he said. Though he had never had cause to even so much as send a person to jail, he understood the burden of leadership all too well. “I want to talk to you about yesterday,” he said hesitatingly. “Even though Father has been turning over some duties to me over the years, he still has the final say in many things. After hearing what you have to say, watching you with your people, I cannot support Mother and Father’s arrangement. Phillipe Remarche would be a liability to the Inquisition, not only because he’s an ill-mannered little weasel, but because he would try to use you to his benefit. That became obvious when they renewed their interest in you.”

Evelyn stood up and walked over to Osborne. She took his hand and held it tightly. “Thank you Brother” she said, simply and sincerely. Having her brother’s support meant the world to her and brought her a great deal of relief. She knew that she was still not off the hook as her parents could try to go ahead without Osborne’s support, but she hoped that they would see reason. “Please stay the night again. We have preparations to make for Halamshiral, but we’re not leaving for a few days yet. It’s nice to have a little down time, and I would like to spend it with you.”

Osborne and Warrick both readily accepted, and Osborne left to go make arrangements with Josephine. Warrick took the seat that Osborne had just vacated and gave his sister a level look. “Little Bit,” he said, shaking his head, “I don’t even know where to begin.” Warrick had not been given a choice about being a Templar- they had come for him shortly after his twelfth birthday. He still remembered Evelyn’s tutors holding her back as she screamed after him, asking him not to leave her alone. It had broken his heart, and he had not been allowed to contact her aside from a few letters on special occasions. He could still see her- red faced, crying, her hair in braids. She had been given strict lessons on how to be young lady, and he still remembered how Mother cuffed her on the head and told her to control herself. He had a hard time comprehending that the awkward ten-year-old he lovingly remembered had just executed a man in front of him. 

Evelyn stopped him. “Please don’t say anything,” she said. “My life is my life. It may not be what was planned for me, but I intend to live it the way I want to for as long as I can.” She could see the look in his eye, and she wanted him to understand that while she had changed, it was for the better. “Please don’t hate me.”

Warrick shook his head. “I could never hate you Little Bit,” he said. “I just wish that this hadn’t happened to you. I always thought that you got a raw deal, and when I heard you had been sent to the Chantry, I was disappointed for you. This isn’t the life I had hoped for you, and I’m afraid you’ll die before you get to really live.” 

Evelyn’s eyes teared. “I’ve already started to live Warrick. Going to the Chantry was the start of a different life for me, thanks to Clancy. Now, I have all of my friends here. I supposed I could do without the Anchor, and the pressures of leadership, but it is what it is. Good with the bad. I’ll be fine Brother,” she said bracingly. 

“I know Little Bit. You have so much strength; more than Mother ever gave you credit for.” Warrick stood up and took Evelyn into his arms. “You’ve grown into a remarkable young woman. I couldn’t be prouder,” he said affectionately. “So let’s stop hiding up here. Why don’t we go find this cousin of ours, and that man of yours too.”

Evelyn stared after him. “How…how did you know?” she stammered. Cullen had held off from showing any affection for her in front of her brothers- he had felt it would be inappropriate given why there were here. She had tried to not even look at Cullen so she wouldn’t show her feelings.

Warrick grinned. “Please, Little Bit. First, I could tell by the way he looked while Bull was telling the dragon story. Second, the kitchen maids talk too much.” With that, he walked to the stairs. Shaking her head, Evelyn followed.

Later that evening, Osborne joined in on the festivities at the Herald’s Rest again. Since the cat was out of the bag, Evelyn sat close to Cullen and watched everyone talking and storytelling. Cullen could tell that Evelyn was tired- executing Erimond had affected her, he could tell that even though she hadn’t said anything. Evelyn asked where Warrick was, but Osborne didn’t know. He said that Warrick had gone for a walk and he hadn’t seen him since. That worried Evelyn- she had thought they were good, but was now wondering if Warrick hadn’t told her the whole truth of how he felt. 

A little later, Warrick entered the pub and walked directly to Evelyn. She got up to greet him and ask if he was all right, but the look on his face stopped her. He dropped down to one knee before Evelyn. “Inquisitor, from this day on, I pledge my life to the Inquisition. My sword and my life are yours, my Sister”. Evelyn exhaled sharply, tears coming to her eyes. She took Warrick’s hand and brought him to stand, and embraced him.


	12. Chapter Twelve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't planning on posting anything today, but this morning, I got the news about Jonny Rees (Greg Ellis), the voice of Commander Cullen and his disappearance. I haven't been able to think of much else today. I pray that he is found safely, and that if he is found, that he gets the help he needs. So I dedicate today's chapter to him and his well-being. Probably not the greatest tribute, but it's what I have to offer.  
> A shorter chapter again, but things are rolling along. We're starting to hit the Winter Palace, which I had originally planned to stop after. Totally didn't happen as I just started working on Chapter 24 yesterday. I had thought about breaking some of this up into a few one-shots, but I've gotten rather attached to this particular character and I want all the things to happen I guess. I'll probably carry this through to the end, after Trespasser since I'm having such a good time writing this.

Chapter Twelve

The next morning, Osborne and his escorts prepared to leave. He hugged his sister and Warrick, shook hands with Cullen, and promised to do what he could with Mother and Father. Warrick watched as they took their leave, and then turned to Evelyn. He was glad he had chosen to stay, and he hoped that whatever duty was assigned to him would keep him near her. He had spent a lot of time walking around the castle yesterday, thinking about what had happened to Evelyn, and he knew that she was in great danger of losing her life before this was over. He knew that his place was here by her side, protecting her. He could see that she didn’t lack for people who wanted to protect her, and he hoped that he could be a part of that group.

Later on, Evelyn and Cullen decided to assign Warrick according to his Templar abilities for the time being. He was going to stay at Skyhold- Evelyn wanted him nearby. He would help with the mages, and stand guard closely over Evelyn while she was there, including at Halamshiral. After that was over, he would accompany Evelyn and her companions as they traveled.

Over the next few days, preparations for Halamshiral were in full swing. Uniforms had been delivered. Evelyn had decided all of the companions would go, even if some were only in a support role, choosing Dorian, Bull and Cassandra as her personal guard. Evelyn was still having trouble sleeping- even with Cullen beside her, the night terrors still came. Solas had prepared a special tea for her, which tasted terrible- and helped a little. The tea helped Cullen more, which Evelyn was grateful for. She worried that he was running himself ragged- pushing himself too much was what triggered that painful episode for him. When she mentioned her worries to him, he waved off her concerns only saying that being there to help her was worth it. He had cut back a little on his Commander duties, relying on Blackwall and a few of his more experienced soldiers to train new recruits. She tried to encourage him to take a night for himself so he could get a full night’s sleep, but Cullen refused. 

Cullen was truly afraid for Evelyn- the terrors at night had gotten so bad that one night, she almost ran out onto her balcony. She had been spreading herself so thin, taking care of him, worrying over Varric, who was still not completely over losing his friend. She had been trying to encourage Warrick to give up lyrium, not wanting him to suffer the same fate as many Templars. The day that Evelyn executed Erimond had frightened him a little. It wasn’t the execution itself- there wasn’t much choice in that in Cullen’s opinion, but it was the change that had come over Evelyn when she carried out the punishment. Even more frightening was the slight tinge of green that had begun to color her eyes. Her beautiful blue eyes now carried a hint of green that seemed to be growing. It was a slow change, but it was very evident. Cullen had come to love Evelyn deeply, even though he was afraid to say it to her. He truly relished holding her in the night, soothing her fears. It gave him a deeper sense of purpose that helped him fight his addiction. He realized after that night she stayed with him that the Inquisition, while worthwhile, was not enough to keep him focused. He had needed something more, and he found that when he fell in love with Evelyn. It didn’t fix everything, but it made managing his pain and other symptoms much easier. So when she offered to let him stay in his own bed for an evening to get a good night’s rest, it was easy to say no. Cullen would gladly give up sleep for the rest of his life if it kept her safe and comfortable.

Solas still had not been able to find a way to stop her terrors. He had them occasionally as well, a little more often since they found themselves in the Fade at Adamant, but it was nothing like what Evelyn was experiencing. He knew that the tea was a mild help, but he didn’t dare increase the dosage for fear of Evelyn never waking up. He had also noticed the change in her eyes, which alarmed him. Whenever he could, Solas would retreat to the fade to see if he could find anything to help, while Dorian did his own research in the library, even questioning Fiona and having her research as well.

Finally, the day before leaving, Evelyn gathered her companions and advisors in the war room. She had been thinking about it a great deal, and had decided to tell them all about Phillipe and his parents. She was concerned that he would say something within earshot of one of her friends, and she wanted them to be prepared. After declining several different offers from arrows to the throat to a good old fashioned beat down, she asked them to let her handle it. Any questions or comments regarding the Inquisitors “wedding” were to be directed to her or Josephine. 

After their meetings, and a round of drinks at the Rest, Evelyn and Cullen made their way up to her quarters. In spite of everything, Evelyn felt relaxed. She no longer worried about seeing Phillipe in person- she was no longer the shy sixteen-year-old, and no longer felt intimidated by him or his family. In fact, she saw it as an irritation, something that was going to distract her from what she needed to do. Maybe Bull was right, she should just punch him in the face and be done with it. The thought of punching Phillipe in front of the Empress made her smile. She knew she couldn’t stoop to that level, but the thought was nice.

That night, Evelyn’s terrors took a turn for the worse. Cullen had seen it getting worse in previous evenings and had gotten to the point where he had posted a guard at the door to her quarters in case he needed to send for help. Tonight, he sent the guard to get Solas, Dorian and Fiona as well. It took them almost two hours to get her calmed down. As she finally settled, Solas watched her intently. He had been watching her since her first terror episode, and had watched her behavior carefully during the day. There had been a subtle change in her personality that Solas could not attribute to her Inquisitor duties or growing confidence. She had finally started coming out of her shell, but there was a sharpness there that wasn’t quite…her. He couldn’t quite put his finger on it and vowed to himself again that he was going to help her. He just wished he could figure out how.


	13. Chapter Thirteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halamshiral. Finally. I mentioned earlier that I had originally planned on a two-part story- the initial story, and the follow-up with the big dramatic confrontation at the Winter Palace. That sort of changed as I wrote this, and the story is now about half over- I'm still writing- up to Chapter Twenty Six as it were. I've grown rather attached to this Inquisitor and her story and will probably now continue through Trespasser. And there will be smut. Probably not very good smut- I'm working on that- it's not as easy as it looks.
> 
> As always, any criticism is welcome. I appreciate the kudos and the comments I received so far. One thing about writing on here is it's encouraged me to leave more comments for the other wonderful stories I have read here, of which there have been many.

Chapter Thirteen

               When Evelyn entered the Winter Palace, she took in the environment with curiosity.  Her childhood studies had not prepared her for parties at all.  In fact, she knew that had she married Phillipe, she would have been left behind, considered an embarrassment.  Chana had outdone herself on Evelyn’s appearance- her hair had been artfully styled, everything was in place.  Everyone was wearing the same uniform, but as promised, Evelyn’s was slightly different.  Still, she was itching to take it off and wear her regular armor- but she had promised Josephine she wouldn’t unless it was absolutely necessary.

               After trading niceties with Grand Duke Gaspard, Evelyn entered with her advisors to be introduced to Empress Celene.  Evelyn lingered in the front hall, Dorian by her side.  Evelyn had promised herself on the trip that she wasn’t going to fall back into a stammering heap she saw Phillipe- she was a stronger person now, with friends and a love of her own to keep her grounded, but now that she was here, she felt herself slipping back into the shy young girl.  She wanted Cullen to put his arms around her and encourage her, but they had agreed to keep separate for the time being.  Josephine was still concerned about the political ramifications, not only between the two families, but also to the Inquisition, and had expressed concern over public acknowledgement of Cullen and Evelyn as a couple.  She knew that no one representing the Inquisition would say anything, and hoped that no one in attendance had been a visitor to Skyhold lately.  It was fine for the people of Skyhold to see Evelyn and Cullen together, but it would be the height of impropriety here at the Palace. 

               In spite of what Evelyn promised herself, she felt her confidence rapidly slipping.  Staring at all of the ornate gowns and masks made her shiver inside and she felt herself falter.  She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to see Dorian smiling at her.  He didn’t even have to say anything to her, just having her back was enough. Evelyn took a deep breath, exhaled and calmly walked into the ballroom.

               “And accompanying him, Lady Inquisitor Trevelyan, daughter of Bann Trevelyan of Ostwick.”  Evelyn stepped forward and bowed to Empress Celene and started to walk towards her.   “Vanquisher of the Rebel mages of Ferelden.  Crusher of the vile apostates of the Mage Underground. Champion of the Blessed Andraste herself.”

               After all the introductions were made and a few opening remarks from Celene, Evelyn found herself free to explore the ballroom a little.  She made the rounds, speaking with everyone and watching several Orlesian ladies and a few gentleman fawning over Cullen.  She approached him just as she saw a young man grab Cullen’s bottom, much to his annoyance.  The ladies dispersed a little as she approached and checked in with him.  As she prepared to go meet with Leliana, she shyly asked Cullen to save her a dance.  Even though she knew she shouldn’t, she couldn’t resist asking him.  She was hurt when he turned her down but understood that he didn’t dance, Templars usually didn’t.  She winked at him as she turned to leave. 

As she walked along the balcony overlooking the dance floor, she felt a tap on her shoulder.  She turned, expecting to see Cullen or Josephine, but instead, found Phillipe.  He was still very handsome, as far as Evelyn could tell behind the decorated mask.  Her breath caught and she paled, but she stood, remaining silent as she stared at him.  “Well, my fiancé,” Phillipe crowed.  “It is nice to see you again.  Dance with me.”  Evelyn stared at him mutely, tongue-tied.  Before she could start stammering, Josephine approached.

               “Inquisitor!  I’ve been looking everywhere for you!  There is someone you must meet.”  Josephine took Evelyn’s arm to lead her away.  Phillipe lightly touched Evelyn’s cheek and bowed slightly.  Josephine nodded at Phillipe and lead Evelyn off.  Josephine could see that Evelyn was about to start stammering and hurried to intervene.  She glanced over at Cullen and saw him stiffen, but he stayed in his place.  As they walked away, Evelyn realized that in spite of all the promises she made to herself, she had not thought of anything she would actually say in the moment.   She hoped she would get a chance to talk to Dorian before seeing Phillipe again. At the moment, she was inwardly kicking herself for standing mute in front of him, when she really wanted to just stare at him in disgust and tell him what she really thought. 

               As she approached Leliana, Josephine went off to keep an eye out for any more encounters, leaving Evelyn and Leliana to talk.  They discussed the Empresses occult advisor, whom Evelyn needed to keep an eye out for.  Leliana noticed that Evelyn looked a little pale and asked her what was wrong.  Evelyn swallowed and told her about Phillipe approaching her while she stood mute like an idiot.  “Honestly Leliana, I felt so stupid.  I stood there gaping like a fish at him.  What do I even say?  Do I tell him off?  Do I react with grace and dignity, turning him down gently?  Do I punch him in the throat?” Evelyn started to pace a little. “Why didn’t I rehearse this a little bit?  I have no idea what I’m going to do!”   

               Leliana stopped her.  “Inquisitor, relax.  Try focusing on the mission at hand.  Now that Josephine knows who to look for, we will keep him off your back until you are ready and have the upper hand.”  Evelyn took a deep breath and gathered herself.  Leliana was right, as usual.  Evelyn realized that this night was just beginning and she really needed to get to it if she was going to save the Empress.  Looking around the foyer, she noticed a hallway and headed in that direction…

               Later, with the game well underway, Evelyn squeaked into the ballroom just after the second bell.  She had snuck off to the library and found a few clues as to where to look next.  As she opened the doors to go back to the ballroom, she heard from behind her, “Well, well.  What have we here?”  Evelyn turned as a beautiful dark-haired woman approached her from the stairway. 

               With those words, Evelyn met Morrigan, Celene’s occult advisor.  Morrigan told her of a Tevinter intruder she had killed- he had a key on him, but she did not know what it was for.  Evelyn had a sneaking suspicion it led to the servant’s quarters-  and determined she would gather her point people and check it out.  After Morrigan left her, Evelyn made an appearance in the ballroom to keep herself visible and spent a few moments speaking with Lady Mantillon, Ambassador Briala and Gaspard, and her advisors before sneaking off again.  After a brief word with Josephine, she left the ballroom and found Cassandra in the entry way.  She asked Cassandra to go get Dorian and meet her by the Servant’s quarters, as Evelyn collected Bull and quietly made their way over there.

               Later, after scouring the servant’s quarters and surrounding apartments for more information, and getting in a few fights, Evelyn, and her companions made their way back to the ballroom as the second bell was ringing.  As she walked back into the ballroom, she was approached by Florianne and was asked to dance.  Evelyn remembered that Celene had introduced Florianne as the Grand Duchess of Lydes, a place Evelyn knew all too well.  Keeping her dignity about her, Evelyn agreed to dance.  They talked as they danced, managing to mask their conversation as banter.  As they finished to applause, they bowed to each other and went their separate ways.  Evelyn left the dance floor, heading in Cullen’s direction when she was again approached by Phillipe. 

               He stood pompously before her and held his hand out.  “It seems you have time to dance with the Grand Duchess, so then, you must have time to dance with your future husband.”  Evelyn glared at him, but not wanting to make a scene, took his hand and let him lead her to the dance floor.  She could feel Cullen’s eyes on her, but dared not look at him.  Well, if she and Florianne could converse on the dance floor, then she could take the opportunity to have a few words with Phillipe.

               “Well, my dear,” Phillipe said, as he put his hand on her waist, “it has been some time has it not?  You have certainly blossomed.”  He swung her around, looking appreciatively at her.  He remembered when they had first met- she was such a homely little thing.  He had not believed it when his parents told him that they were to get married- he had so many female admirers, and he was to be saddled with that little mess.  He thought of the many heated arguments with his parents over the whole issue, culminating into his running away the night before the wedding.  His parents had been upset with him for causing such embarrassment and giving the Trevelyan’s the upper hand, but eventually they forgave him. When the rumors had started about Evelyn leading the Inquisition, he could barely believe it, but his mother had been at the Summer Bazaar when Evelyn arrived and had seen it for herself.  What a match she would make now- the Inquisition had to be swimming in gold, and Evelyn was now one of the most desirable women in the world.  Father had told him that the Trevelyan’s had been writing letters encouraging the contract for years, all he had to do now is claim her.

               Evelyn contemplated him coldly as they danced.  “Blossomed?  I guess you could say that.” She replied. As they danced, she found that she was slowly growing more annoyed than panicked.  She had things to do, she didn’t need to be spending time with him right now.  She had to get over to Celene’s quarters as soon as possible before the night came to a close.    As soon as she was able to get away from Phillipe, she was going to get this done.  Evelyn remained cold towards Phillipe for the remainder of their dance, barely responding to anything he said, but not out of shyness this time- more out of irritation. 

               As the dance ended, Phillipe escorted Evelyn off the dance floor, keeping his hand on the small of her back, trying to steer her to somewhere they could talk.  “Come, my dear, shall we discuss our arrangement?” 

               Evelyn rolled her eyes and removed herself from Phillipe’s grasp.  “Phillipe, there is no arrangement.  I will not be marrying you, and there is nothing you can say that will change that.”  With that, Evelyn walked off, leaving Phillipe with his mouth hanging open.  She winked at Cullen as she walked by him, and he smirked back, as he turned down yet another lady asking him to dance.  Evelyn continued on to meet Bull, Dorian and Cassandra to go on to Celene’s quarters.

               Soon enough, the evening was over.  Evelyn had saved Celene, and had even reunited her with Briala, and convinced all three to work together for the future of Orlais, and for the world.  Florianne had been confronted before she had gotten the chance to kill Celene, and had been arrested. She would be brought back to Skyhold for judgement. 

               As Evelyn made her way to the balcony for a moment of quiet, Phillipe approached her yet again.  He moved to put his hand on her back again, but Evelyn sidestepped him, leaving his hand hanging in mid-air.  As they walked along, Evelyn noticed that his parents were standing at the door to the ballroom, watching them intently, as were Cullen and Morrigan.  Phillipe followed Evelyn out to the balcony, much to her annoyance.  “My dear,” Phillipe implored, “I know you must be angry at me for embarrassing you on our wedding day.  I was young, and not ready to be married yet…”

               Evelyn held up her hand to cut him off, her anchored left hand unconsciously flexing as if she wanted to open a rift and send him through right there.  “You were young,” Evelyn spat, “so what?  I was young too.  Do you have any idea what I went through after you left?  Do you know what kind of damage you did to a sixteen-year-old who was alone and scared and leaving her home for the first time?  And now, you want to me to just marry you.  Well, I will not.  I have no interest in marrying you, or in any contract.  I don’t care about any agreements- they were with my parents, not with me.  We are leaving tomorrow for Skyhold, and I never want to see you or your family again.”  With that, Evelyn stalked off, headed for the balcony on the other side of the ballroom, just trying to get away from him.  As she entered the balcony, she saw Morrigan waiting for her.  Evelyn drew a breath and exhaled, smiling a welcome at her.  Morrigan had come to tell her that Celene had appointed her liaison to the Inquisition and that she would be returning with them to Skyhold when she left.  Evelyn thought for a moment, knowing she didn’t really have a choice and welcomed Morrigan to come with them.  As she left, Cullen entered and came to stand next to Evelyn. 

               “There you are, everyone’s been looking for you,” he said to her, looking concerned.  “Things have calmed down for the moment, are you all right?”  Cullen had been watching her as much as he could that evening and had heard of the fighting through the palace.  It had not pleased him to watch her dance with Phillipe, or to see her talking to him on the balcony, but he trusted Evelyn and would not pressure her for details.

               “I’m just worn out,” Evelyn replied, leaning wearily on the railing.  “tonight has been…very long.” She meant that with every fiber of her being.  Years of being tutored in Orlesian customs had not prepared her for this game, and she felt stretched beyond her limit.  She was looking forward to going home and maybe having a rest.  Anywhere would be better than here at the moment, even the Exalted Plains, which was not among her list of favorite places to visit.

               Cullen rested his hand on her shoulder.  “For all of us.  I’m glad it’s over,” Cullen stood quietly for a moment.  “I know it’s foolish, but I was worried for you tonight,”  Evelyn smiled slightly and covered Cullen’s arm with her hand.  As they stood quietly, there was a swell in the music coming from inside.  Cullen looked over to the dancers briefly and turned to Evelyn, smiling his handsome half-smirk.  “I may never get a chance like this, so I must ask,” he backed away, holding out his hand, “May I have this dance, my lady?”

               Evelyn stood up and regarded Cullen for a moment.  “Of course,” she said, as she put her hand in his. “I thought you didn’t dance?”  she asked him, as he pulled her into his arms.  She knew they couldn’t go below to join the dancing, and she was perfectly content with that.  When they had arrived, she didn’t know if she was going to get a chance to dance with Cullen, and she was glad that she was able to, even if it was only in secret.

               “For you, I’ll try,” Cullen said in her ear as they started to dance.  They held each other closely as they moved, everything and everyone disappearing for a few captured moments.

 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not a lot to say. I've been trying to go back and read what I've already written so I can keep good continuity. This one is pretty fluffy I think. I've noticed that while I tend to be very wordy in everyday life, I can't seem to translate that to writing- which ends up being more concise. Working on that!

Chapter Fourteen

               The trip home was uneventful, but Evelyn felt uneasy.  She still was not sleeping- she didn’t want her night terrors waking the entire camp.  She drank the tea Solas made for her, but they only kept the dreams away for a few hours before they came back.  She left her tent and found Warrick on duty at the edge of the camp.  They talked about everything that happened at the Palace and wondered what would happen with Phillipe.  Both Evelyn and Warrick felt they hadn’t heard the last of him or her parents on the matter and wondered what would happen next. “I wonder if I should invite Mother and Father to Skyhold,” Evelyn mused, “With Osborne backing me up, maybe they’ll finally get it”.

               “I don’t know Little Bit,” Warrick said thoughtfully, “I don’t remember them caring too much about our feelings.”  They sat in silence for a little while, each reflecting on their own experiences with their parents.  Father had been distant with them both, but Evelyn never knew if it was because he was afraid to love them only to lose them to their promised futures, or if he only saw them as a Templar and an Orlesian wife.  Father would occasionally pat the top of Evelyn’s head, or stand and watch Warrick’s training for a few moments on his way to somewhere else, but he spent most of his time with Osborne.  Mother spent most of her time with Clarissa, and neither Evelyn or Warrick could remember any moments of affection from her at all.  Warrick continued, “Does it matter Sister?  Really, does their approval matter that much?”

               Evelyn didn’t say anything for a long time.  She looked back at her tent where Cullen was sleeping and thought about the stories he had told her about his childhood and his loving family. “I don’t know Warrick.  I didn’t even know what I was missing in my life until I started watching the children at Skyhold with their parents, and the children in the villages.  They would run to their mothers and fathers, and I’d watch their parents pick them up, swing them around, plant kisses on their heads, and I’d wonder, was I so unlovable?”  Warrick took her hand and held it in his as she continued.  “When I first joined the Inquisition, I figured that I would just fight until I died.  Giving my life for a good cause seemed to be a good way to go, and it would end the loneliness that I felt.  I never thought I would have a chance to love someone, or have a family, and I’m afraid I’m going to mess it up.  How do you learn how to love when your own parents couldn’t love you?”

               “I think you’re off to a pretty good start given how much our Commander is smiling these days,” Evelyn started as Dorian came out of the shadows.  “Cousin, you know as well as I that we must look to each other for help.”  He came and sat down with them, and took Evelyn’s other hand in his.  “What you lacked then, you’ve more than made up for now.  You have a new family that loves you and will always be there for you-please don’t start to doubt yourself.  Don’t let that ridiculous man and your parents ruin you. Someday, when you have children of your own, you can lavish the love you didn’t get on them, and they will run to you, and you will pick them up and spin them around and plant kisses on their heads.”

               Evelyn squeezed Warrick’s and Dorian’s hands.  She hugged them both and left to go to her tent.  As she entered, Cullen stirred sleepily and held his arms out to her.  She got into bed and snuggled down against him, wrapping her arms around him.  “Is everything all right?” he asked her sleepily as he nuzzled her neck, “Where’ve you been?”

               “Talking to Dorian and Warrick.  You were sleeping so soundly, and I was having a restless night- I wanted to let you sleep.”  Cullen reached over and grabbed a cup of tea and handed it to her.

               “Here, drink some of the tea Solas gave you.  It’s not bad cold.  It’s a few hours to dawn, you can still get some shut-eye.”  Evelyn took the cup and drained it and laid back, Cullen’s arm around her waist.  She ran her fingers through his hair and kissed his forehead, thinking about what Dorian said.  Was Cullen smiling more?  Was he happy?  It was way too often that the doubts would creep in, making Evelyn waver between her new-found confidence and crushing insecurity.  They had been taking their relationship slowly- this being the first for both, and she was fine with that.  She feared what would happen if she didn’t survive, leaving him behind, and worried that she was being selfish in starting a relationship she may not be able to finish. 

               Cullen awoke the next morning to find Evelyn dressed and carrying two cups of tea with her, handing him one as she sat.  She looked like she had something on her mind, but there was quiet between them as they drank and relaxed against each other.  Evelyn fidgeted with her cup before speaking.  “Cullen, this relationship between us- are you…happy?”

               He looked at her, concerned.  “I am,” he answered, “Why do you ask?”  Even though Cullen was thirty years old, and had certainly never lacked for female admirers, some of whom he had bedded, he had never given his heart to any of them.  He had always felt remorse for those hopeful women when he could not return their affections, and had never planned on falling in love, choosing a life of duty instead.  When he joined the Inquisition, he didn’t plan ahead, not certain of his life expectancy, given the giant hole in the sky.  Then he met Evelyn, and she had somehow managed to steal his heart.  It made him hopeful for the future.

               She stared into her cup, uncertain. “I’m just…I don’t…” she stammered.  Heaving a deep breath and closing her eyes, she came out with it.  “What if I’m not worth it?”  she said quickly.  She looked away. “You are so kind and gentle and brave.  I’m a mess.  Glowing hand, big monster after me, night terrors, complicated family, and life.  I’ve heard people talking around Skyhold, and I saw all of those admirers at the Palace.  You could have anyone you wanted- someone with a future, who can put you first all the time.  I don’t know if you should waste your time on me…” she trailed off. “You deserve better.”

               Cullen ran his hand up and down Evelyn’s back as he thought about what she said.  “So a lyrium addicted traumatized ex-Templar, who has never been able to fall in love I might add, deserves more than a shy, sweet beautiful young woman, who always puts everyone’s needs above her own.  Someone who bravely fights for the world that hasn’t treated her very fairly, without asking for anything in return.  Tell me again what you think I deserve?” he said, smiling.  “For what it’s worth, I’m immensely proud to be by your side.”

               Her brow furrowing, she muttered, “I just don’t see a future for myself right now.  Maybe I wasn’t meant to have a future at all.”

               Cullen thought about it for a while before speaking.  “I think the lot of us don’t see much of a future for ourselves, Evelyn.  That’s why we need to steal the moments we can- to make this all worthwhile.  Every one of us is working hard, and putting our lives on hold, following you because you have earned our trust and love.  If our future is limited, I want to spend that time with you- making moments to live for.”  He looked at her uncertainly.  “Do you…you do want a future don’t you?”

               Evelyn took his hand.  “I think I do.  Warrick and Dorian helped me realize that last night.  They told me I needed to stop looking to my parents for approval and go my own way, make my own family. I just…I wasn’t sure…”

               Cullen kissed her, softly at first, but growing urgent as they carried on.  He pulled away, this not being the right time to continue.  “Never doubt it,” he said to her.  “You are the one I want to be with.  We both have our problems, but we can face them together.”

 


	15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen

               Evelyn sat on the Inquisitor’s throne awaiting the first of three judgements.  They had been back at Skyhold for only a few days before she took off for the Emprise du Lion to track down Samson’s latest movements in the Sahrnia quarries, and ended up battling Imshael.  They had been gone for a few weeks, including another trip to Val Royeaux to track down Blackwall, who had turned out to be an imposter by the name of Thom Ranier.  After arranging for Thom to be brought back to Skyhold for judgement, she finally headed home.

               She was exhausted, but decided to get her duties done right away, in hopes of having a little time to rest before heading out again.  The first was relatively simple.  Grand Duchess Florianne de Chalons was made an agent of the Inquisition.  Evelyn had given it a great deal of thought during her travels, and had decided that it was the best solution- she knew Florianne would give up every piece of knowledge to save her own skin- so both would benefit.

               The second, a grey warden, Ser Ruth had turned herself in after Adamant so she could pay for her crimes.  Evelyn had to think about this one for a moment.  Adamant had affected her greatly, but she couldn’t help but remember that the Wardens were now allies, and that they had been fooled by Erimond.  She had exacted her revenge by killing Erimond and did not want to do the same to Ser Ruth.  Evelyn forgave her in the name of Andraste and bade her to atone for her actions by helping others.  Solas and Cullen were especially relieved at Evelyn’s decision- after watching her execute Erimond, they were concerned what her decision would be.

               Blackwall was the third judgement.  When they returned from Emprise du Lion and had discovered that he had left, Cullen had found her sitting in the stable near the griffon that Blackwall had been carving.  He knew that Evelyn had come to care for Blackwall as a good friend, advisor and teacher and had shared some drinks with him the night before he left.  She sat holding his letter in her hand, reading it over and over, trying to make sense of it.  It had sent Evelyn into a tailspin of self-doubt again, wondering what she had done, or hadn’t done to make him leave.  When they found him in Val Royeaux, she talked with him for a long time.  She had a hard time understanding his actions, but she refused to let him die.  She needed him to stay with the Inquisition, not only because of his value as a fighter, she needed his friendship and loyalty.  In the end, she decided to give him to the Wardens once this war was over.  She had a feeling that he would go through the joining and become the Warden he was meant to be. 

               After her duties were over, Evelyn went back to the stables to talk to Blackwall for a bit and to groom her Bog Unicorn.  She had been apprehensive at first when she saw the strange looking horse, but they had formed a bond that could not be broken.  She had been told that he wanted to serve a noble purpose, and when she had been looking over her choice of steeds, he had cantered right up to her and bowed low.  The people of Skyhold had eventually gotten used to him, and Evelyn could not even think of riding another horse.  Warrick had come to find her and sat companionably watching Evelyn work, the three of them bantering back and forth.  As they laughed together, Cullen hurried in, his face tense.  Evelyn looked up at him with concern.  Cullen looked at Evelyn and Warrick and said, “You need to come with me.  Now.”  Confused, they left with him and walked towards the main hall.  As they entered, Evelyn stopped short.  Standing in front of her were her Phillipe and both sets of parents.

 


	16. Chapter Sixteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get two chapters this time. I haven't been posting as much as I should, and I had a huge bout of writing this weekend that I enjoyed very much, putting me up to 33 chapters. I'll be changing the rating to E as this is the first smut I have ever written. Any critiques would be welcome.

Chapter Sixteen

               Madame Elaina Trevelyan looked appraisingly at her youngest daughter when she entered.  She hadn’t seen Evelyn in about eight years- she had grown.  Were those tattoos around her eyes? Evelyn was dressed in the same blue tunic outfit she had been wearing the day she played chess with Cullen, her hair was hanging in neat waves down her back.  She looked tired, but Elaina could see that she had matured into a seemly young woman.  She was still nowhere near as lovely as Clarissa or Charlotte, but she had improved some.  Someone had obviously been working with her on her clothing and hair, a welcome improvement.  Elaina noticed Warrick standing next to Evelyn- had had grown so handsome and strong over the years- what had it been, almost 14 years?  She was disappointed that he had left his post with the Templars and planned on bringing him back with them when they left.

               Evelyn stood looking at her parents, no expression on her face.  She ignored the Remarches, as far as she was concerned, they didn’t matter.  Without turning away, she called to Josephine.  “Find them rooms for the evening, and please provide some dinner.  Anything else will have to wait until the morning.”   With that, she walked past them to her quarters and locked the door behind her.

               After spending an hour pacing back and forth angrily, Evelyn realized that she wasn’t doing herself any good by locking herself away and decided to go and get some fresh air.  She stalked through the Main Hall and out the doors to the courtyard.  She looked up and saw the light on in Cullen’s office and started walking toward it. 

               She entered his office as Cullen was giving orders to some of his officers.  He noticed Evelyn standing there and hesitated in his instructions, noticing the look on her face.  Finally, he dismissed the soldiers with a “that will be all” and ushered them out the door, closing and locking it behind them.  He stood with his hands on the door and his head down.  “There’s always something more, isn’t there?”  he said, more to himself than to Evelyn. 

               Evelyn smiled.  “Wishing we were somewhere else?”  She herself was thinking about their time at the lake.  It had been the only real alone time they had, and she had truly enjoyed it. 

               Cullen laughed.  “I barely found time to get away before.  This war won’t last forever.  When it started, I hadn’t considered much beyond our survival.  But things are different now.” 

               “What do you mean?”  Evelyn asked, concerned.  She saw the look on his face when he had come to take her to her parents and she was worried.  They had been through so much together over the last several weeks, and she still sometimes worried that someday he would think she wasn’t worth all of the trouble.

               “I find myself wondering what will happen after.  When this is over.  I won’t want to move on,” Cullen said, caressing Evelyn’s cheek. “Not from you.”  Cullen knew that Evelyn had no plans on changing her mind about marrying Phillipe- he had no concerns about that, but they had been through a lot together- why would she want a lyrium addicted traumatized Templar when she would have the world at her fingertips?  He had seen the covetous glances of quite a few young men, and a few women at the Winter Palace, and had heard murmurings of some of the young men at Skyhold as well.  Evelyn had blossomed into a lovely young woman, she could have her pick.  “But I don’t know what you… that is…if you…uh….” Cullen turned around and starting reorganizing the papers on his desk. 

               Evelyn stopped him and came to lean on the desk near him.  “Cullen, do you need to ask?”  She desperately wanted him to understand how much she loved him.  She was constantly afraid that she would frighten him away with her family problems and night terrors, especially now that her parents were here.  She felt so safe in his arms when he helped her chase the dreams away, and she hoped he felt the same way when she held him during his nightmares, and during his headaches.  There was nothing more that she wanted than to be with him the rest of her days.

               Cullen came closer and looked into her eyes, whispering “I suppose not”.  Evelyn had leaned back and accidentally knocked a wine bottle off of the desk, gasping in surprise.  Cullen and Evelyn both looked at the broken bottle and then looked at each other.  She looked so beautiful in the low light, and Cullen wanted to be close to her.  Shaking his head, he swept everything off of the desk and taking Evelyn by the waist started guiding her further onto the desk, climbing on top of her as she lay down.  He looked into her eyes, questioning and found only an open look of love and desire in her eyes.  Cullen leaned down and kissed Evelyn deeply, a kiss she eagerly returned.  Her hands came up to frame Cullen’s face, finally burying themselves in his hair as she tried to pull him closer.  She felt his hips pressing into hers, his hardening manhood evident.  It excited her.  She had thought of this moment for a long time but hadn’t felt ready until now. 

               Cullen too had been waiting for this moment.  He loved her deeply and very much wanted to show her what she meant to him.  When he felt their hips meet, he pulled away to look at her.  He knew that she had never been with anyone and he didn’t want to frighten her.  “Evelyn, are you certain?” he asked her uncertainly, “I don’t want to rush you into anything.”

               Evelyn smiled and brought her hands to frame his face again.  She reached up to kiss him gently on lips. “Cullen, I’ve never been so sure.  I want to be with you, right now, this night.”  Cullen leaned down to kiss her, parting her mouth with his to let his tongue run along her lip.  Leaning to support his weight on one arm, his other hand went to Evelyn’s breast for a moment before starting to unbutton her tunic. 

               Then he stopped himself and sat up. “Let’s at least take this upstairs.  Your first time shouldn’t be on a desk.”  He got up off of her and held out his hand.  Evelyn smiled and took his hand.  They made it as far as the ladder before Cullen spun her around against it and kissed her again.  Evelyn let her hands roam over Cullen, stopping at the collar of his mantle and starting pushing it off of him.  He helped her take it off, leaving it crumpled at the bottom of the ladder.  Cullen continued to kiss his way down her neck, unbuttoning her shirt as he traveled down her body.  “Maker, I just can’t stay away from you,” he growled before starting to guide her up the ladder.  Evelyn turned around and hurried up as fast as she could, Cullen following quickly behind. 

               When they made it up to the loft, Cullen seized her and kissed her again.  Evelyn matched him, running her tongue across his lips as he had done to her before.  She wasn’t exactly sure what she was doing, and if he would like it, but his response showed that he approved greatly.  He helped Evelyn pull her shirt off and she started to help him remove pieces of his armor, stopping to kiss as they worked.  Soon, Cullen was dressed only in his light tunic and breeches.  Evelyn could barely take her eyes off of him-she rarely saw him in anything but his armor, and she had to take a moment to appreciate how well the shirt fit him and how beautiful he looked in the light streaming in from above.  Cullen moved them towards the bed and sat Evelyn down on the edge, kneeling in front of her.  He removed her boots and came in to kiss Evelyn’s stomach and she leaned back on the bed. Cullen continued to kiss his way up Evelyn’s body, stopping to fumble with her breast band.  In a fit of inhibition, Evelyn hesitated before letting Cullen remove it, sitting up and crossing her arms over her breasts as if shield herself from his eyes. 

               Even though she was more than willing to let Cullen take her, she had to admit to herself that she was feeling overwhelmed and a little conflicted.  In the Chantry, and in her tutor’s teachings, she was supposed to remain pure until she was married.  Of course, she had urges when she was in the Chantry, and had been curious about sex, but she had never had the courage to do anything about it, or to ask anyone’s advice.  She had overheard things from other members of the Chantry though, tantalizing things that made her curious.  As her feelings for Cullen had gradually grown stronger, she did not feel the pull of the Chantry’s teachings as strongly as she once had, and she had come to realize that not only was she an adult, but she was no longer a member of the Chantry, having no plans on returning if she lived through this war. 

               IF she lived through this war.  Maker only knew how much time Evelyn had left, and she knew that if her time was short, she wanted to live her life the way she wanted to.  That included giving herself to her beloved, and not marrying someone because she was told to.  She had even shyly asked Dorian for his opinion one evening when they were out in the field and what he told her was much the same- if she loved Cullen, then she should let their relationship take the natural progression when she was ready.  And she felt she was ready.

               Cullen smiled at Evelyn and took her hands, gently releasing them from her arms and opening her up to his eyes.  Holding her breath, and staying still, she looked at him as he took her in.  He let go of her hand and trailed his fingers from her neck down her breast and ran his thumb lightly over her peak.  Evelyn gasped at the feeling of pleasure and looked away, embarrassed.  He took Evelyn by the chin and guided her face back to his and kissed her deeply for a moment.  “Don’t look away love.  You are wonderful. I love you.”

               Tears sprang to Evelyn’s eyes- it was the first time he had ever said that.   That anyone had ever said that to her.  She inhaled as the tears ran down her cheeks.  Cullen saw she was crying and stopped, alarmed.  “Did I do something wrong?” he asked worriedly.

               “No, Cullen- everything is right.  I love you.”  She wanted to say more, about how important he had become, how he made this war worth fighting, but she had lost her words.  She took him in her arms and kissed him again, hard.  Cullen responded, a moan escaping him as his tongue parted her lips again.  He started to kiss down her neck onto her chest, taking the peak of her breast into his mouth, his fingers on her other nipple at the same time.  Evelyn felt a stab of unexpected pleasure and moaned, holding his head as he laved her breasts with his tongue.  Cullen gently pushed Evelyn back, working his way down her stomach with his mouth.  When he reached her leggings, he started to ease them down, Evelyn lifting her hips to help him remove her leggings and small clothes.  He ran his hands over her body, his hand coming to rest at her mound, which had become quite wet with anticipation. 

               Evelyn was resting back on her elbows watching Cullen as he explored her body, still hardly daring to believe that this beautiful man was with her, loving her, currently kissing every part of her body, including…oh, There.  Cullen lowered his head between her legs, resting her thighs on his shoulders, and ran his tongue along her slit, working the nub at the top as she threw her head back and moaned with pleasure. Cullen continued to tease and lick her center, relishing every gasp and moan he heard coming from her.  He felt Evelyn’s legs tense around his as he nuzzled her, circling her clit with his tongue. 

               Evelyn couldn’t believe how good it felt, she didn’t want him to ever stop.  She felt the heat pooling as Cullen ran the flat of his tongue over her, eliciting a startled gasp from Evelyn as she felt herself coming on edge.  Cullen brought his hands to her nipples as he laved her clit with his tongue, Evelyn arching her back and raising her hips to meet his mouth.  He moaned, the vibrations adding a new texture to his actions, making Evelyn buck her hips in response.  Evelyn could feel the waves building, a curious new sensation that she was eager to explore.  As Cullen played with her peaks and ran his tongue over her clit, Evelyn climaxed, quivering and crying out, calling his name over and over in ecstasy.  Cullen smiled and wiped his mouth, coming up to hold Evelyn close as she came down from her orgasm. 

               After a few moments of recovery, Evelyn sat up and started tugging Cullen’s shirt over his head.  He stood up and removed his shirt as she worked at the waistband of his breeches, pulling them down with his small clothes to reveal his impressive length.  As Cullen stood before her, Evelyn reached out to run her finger down it before circling his member with his hand and slowly applied pressure while moving her fist up and down the length of it.  Cullen’s breath quickened and his hands roamed over her hair and shoulders as she explored.  She brought her tongue to the tip of his cock and took an experimental taste.  Encouraged as Cullen groaned in pleasure, she took his cock into her mouth and let it slide along his length.  She took in as much of him as she could, swirling her tongue around his member, hitting the sensitive underside as she moved back and forth. Remembering what Cullen did, Evelyn moaned, the vibrations causing Cullen to cry out, his hand’s tightening in Evelyn’s hair.  When he felt he was close, Cullen stopped Evelyn and guided her further back onto the bed. 

               He stopped for a moment, his head buried between her breasts, panting as he calmed himself down a bit.  He caressed Evelyn’s face, looking into her eyes and kissed her.  “Are you ready?”  he asked huskily, as he brought his hand to her breast again, pinching her nipple and making her melt. 

               “Maker Cullen, yes.  Take me.” Evelyn breathed.  This could not have felt more right to her.  She loved him so much and wanted him to make her his, right now.

               Cullen lined his cock up with her folds and, gritting his teeth, slowly started to enter her.  He tried to be careful- he knew the first time could hurt.  Evelyn arched her back and pushed her hips up to encourage Cullen.  She was not afraid.  “Cullen, just fuck me- don’t worry,” she breathed.  Cullen groaned and swore- he didn’t think he had ever heard Evelyn use such coarse language, and it sent a shot of heat straight through to his cock.  He took a breath and pushed himself inside of Evelyn, watching her carefully for signs of pain or distress.  Evelyn gasped as he entered her.  It hurt for a second, not as bad as she was afraid of, but she felt herself stretching around him as he pushed in. 

               Cullen stilled for a moment while Evelyn got used to the feeling.  When she nodded that she was ready, he pulled out almost all the way and thrust in again.  Evelyn smiled and angled herself to try to take him in as deep as she could, striving to feel the pleasure that she knew would be coming.  Their breath grew ragged as Cullen thrust into her, picking up speed, his forehead pressed to hers.  Evelyn’s hands roamed Cullen’s body as he fucked her, their bodies slicked with sweat from their efforts. 

               Suddenly, Cullen got up on his knees, pulling Evelyn’s legs around his waist, his thumb circling her clit as he continued to thrust into her.  Evelyn gasped from the change of the angle and the pressure from Cullen’s thumb and from his cock hitting all the right spots inside of her.  Her back arched as she brought her hands to her own breasts, playing with her nipples as Cullen fucked her hard and fingered her clit.  Cullen watched her as she swore, calling his name, the maker, asking him to fuck her harder and it took all of his strength to hold himself back until she came again.  “Come for me Evie, I want to feel you come for me,” he panted, and with that, Evelyn came again.  Her muscles tightened around his member as she convulsed in pleasure, crying his name, her fingers clutching the sheets as she writhed under him.  Watching her as she came undone, Cullen slammed into her, losing control as he drove into her, and he cried out her name with his release.  As he came, he pumped into her a few more times before collapsing on top of her in a sweaty heap.

               Evelyn put her arms around him as they lay together, panting and trembling from the aftershocks from their union, both twitching from pleasure.  Cullen ran his fingers through her hair and looked at her, smiling and kissed her.  “Are you all right Evie?” he asked her, hoping he hadn’t hurt her.  He traced the line of her face with his finger as she smiled up at him, kissing him to show him that she was fine. 

               After a few more moments of lying together, Evelyn sat up for a moment and noticed there was a little blood on the sheets.  Cullen saw it too and stuttered an apology.  “Cullen, it’s fine.  I’m fine.  Don’t worry- it doesn’t hurt. In fact, it couldn’t be more right.”  She wasn’t bleeding anymore and didn’t even feel sore.  Maybe that would change, but for now, she couldn’t be happier. She lay back in his arms and snuggled sleepily in, running her hands over his body in lazy circles.  Cullen relaxed into her, reveling in her nearness and in what they had just done.  He was so overcome with his emotions towards her, he couldn’t help but say it again. “I love you, Evie”.

               Evelyn smiled.  “Evie?  I like it.  And I love you too.”  She kept exploring Cullen’s body, not able to get enough and felt him stirring again.  He moaned as she took his member in her hand again, feeling it growing hard again.  Cullen growled and pulled Evelyn up so she was straddling him.  She could feel his cock hard against her center and ground against it as she kissed Cullen.  She could feel herself getting wet for him again, and sat up on him, feeding his cock into her as she lowered herself slowly onto him, exhaling slowly as he filled her.  She started to ride him slowly as Cullen’s hand found her hips and guided her speed. He panted as her speed increased, and he sat up as she rode him, his hands on her ass and his mouth on her breasts.  His hips bucked beneath her as he sucked and licked on her nipples, moaning and panting as she fucked him.  Her head was thrown back as the waves of pleasure built inside of her, and she cried out when Cullen’s fingers again found her clit and he pleasured her while she rode him hard.  Cullen felt his cock twitch inside of her as he came to his climax, his convulsing member being encouraged along by the tightening of Evelyn’s muscles as she came too.  They cried out as they orgasmed together and fell into each other panting.  Evelyn pressed her forehead to Cullen’s as they lay recovering, catching their breath.  After lying together enjoying the closeness, Evelyn got up and walked over to the water basin to clean herself up, bringing a towel to Cullen so he could do the same.  She got back into bed and snuggled up to Cullen, both falling asleep within minutes, still in each other’s arms.

 


	17. Chapter Seventeen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The showdown is about to begin. A few fluffy moments for confidence first though...

Chapter Seventeen

               Evelyn awoke the next morning and realized that the time had come to deal with her parents.  She dressed quietly, not wanting to wake Cullen.  As she was putting her boots on, she heard Cullen behind her in the throes of a nightmare.  He woke suddenly, looking around in a panic, like he didn’t know where he was, before falling back onto his pillow again, breathing heavily. 

               “Bad dream?”  Evelyn asked as she put his hand on her chest reassuringly.  She realized that she had made it through the night without an incident, but it looked like Cullen wasn’t so lucky.

               Staring at the ceiling, Cullen replied, “They always are.  I cannot escape them.”  He sat up and caressed Evelyn’s cheek.  “I didn’t mean to worry you,” his voice trailed off.

               Evelyn returned his affection.  “You can let me worry about you a little…” she said lovingly.  She made a mental note to spend some time in the library again, to see if she could find anything more about lyrium addiction that might have been missed- with all those books in that dusty library in the lower level, there had to be something there.

               Cullen laughed. “All right.”  He brought Evelyn in and pressed his forehead to hers.  “You are…I have never felt anything like this”.  Last night had been so incredible, he could barely express himself for it.   It was all he could do to not throw her down and take her right now, but he knew that they had business to deal with today.

               “I love you, you know that right?” Evelyn asked him.  She gazed into his eyes, enjoying this quiet moment.  It felt so good to finally be able to tell him how she felt about him and to hear him say it back. 

               “I love you too,” Cullen said and kissed her. 

               She didn’t want to leave, but she knew that she had to see her parents as soon as possible.  It was early enough that she would have time to bathe and change before they rose for the day.  She sat at the edge of the bed, biting her lip, trying to decide what she wanted to say to her parents.  Cullen lay quietly on the bed as she talked about it.  He couldn’t offer any advice, but just lending a sympathetic ear seemed to be all she needed. 

               “I’m going to head to my quarters, clean up and change.  Would you care to join me?” she asked Cullen a little shyly.  Cullen grinned and gathered his clothes.  After dressing, they made their way to her room where they enjoyed a pleasurable time in her bath.  When they were done, Evelyn sent for Chana to help her get ready as Cullen sat at her desk and looked over some reports.

               “Evie,” Cullen said as he looked over the reports that someone had laid on Evelyn’s desk, “it appears they have found Samson’s headquarters.  We need to take care of this as soon as possible.  I would like to accompany you.  I would sleep better knowing I was at your side.”

               Evelyn nodded.  “Let’s get Leliana’s agents to watch until we can go.  As soon as we take care of my parents, we can leave.”

               As Chana worked on Evelyn’s hair, she and Cullen debated about whether he should accompany her in talking to her parents.  Evelyn knew that she would not be able to get through this without someone being there with her, but she was afraid of what would happen if they found out that she was in love with Cullen.  It wasn’t necessarily her parents that were the problem, but the Remarches could cause issues.  They had been known to use assassins to get their way, and that scared Evelyn more than she wanted to admit.  As they talked, Josephine came up to inform Evelyn that her parents had awakened and were currently having breakfast and that she would escort them to the war room when they were done.  “Leliana is otherwise engaged and cannot attend, but she has taken care of matters and left the details with me,” Josephine explained.

               As the diplomat, Cullen and Evelyn asked Josephine’s advice on the matter.  Josephine agreed that Evelyn should not be alone, and agreed that Cullen should be there- as there was a chance they knew about him already through Osborne.  While she was afraid for Cullen, she knew it would be difficult for an assassin to get into Skyhold, and she also did not want to hide from her parents anymore.  She asked Josephine to send for Dorian- she wanted him to be there as well. This would be the first time that Evelyn would stand up for herself to her parents, and she was glad she would not be alone. 

               Evelyn had always been intimidated by her mother.  She had been cold, distant and hypercritical towards Evelyn- never a tender moment.  The constant comparing of Evelyn to her siblings, the sighs, and huffs when Evelyn would be dressed up for an event, but still disappoint had stayed with Evelyn all this time.  Even now, when she knew that she was going to be addressing people, or just out in public, she would be paralyzed with nervousness, staring at herself in the mirror critically, and trying to not vomit.  She found herself doing so now.  Chana had done her usual magic on Evelyn, so she could find nothing wrong, but knowing she was going to see her mother kept Evelyn critically going over her image in the mirror. She studied herself again- Solas had commented the other day that the green in her eyes was growing, and she thought he was right.  She wondered if maybe the anchor had been changing her more than just being a way to close rifts.   

               Her life had changed in so many ways so quickly, and she didn’t know what she could attribute to her growing maturity, or to the anchor and the fade.  She had noticed the concern in people’s eyes after she executed Lord Erimond, especially in Dorian’s and Cullen’s.  What she felt when she killed him had affected her too- a wild rage that overcame her in the moment.  She had felt it occasionally when she was in particular danger, and assumed it was the heat of battle.  It was only when it came over her so suddenly that day that it started to concern her.  She was terrified she would lose herself to the fade, it was a constant thought in the back of her mind.  After they returned from Halamshiral, she had spent some time with Morrigan, hoping she would have some insight into what was happening- the night terrors, the changing eyes, the temperament.  Morrigan had promised to look into it, she did have some thoughts but wanted to be sure before saying anything.  Morrigan had noticed some changes when she had taken Evelyn to the Crossroads but hadn’t decided yet if these changes were positive or not.  She would bear watching.

               Dorian came up the stairs and walked over to Evelyn.  He stood her up and held her at arm’s length and admired her.  She had spent some time carefully choosing her outfit, even though she wanted to go in armor.  She had chosen a long red gown, that was overlaid with a fine silvery lace around the waist, upper bodice and down the arms.  Her hair flowed in waves down her back. Chana had braided a few sections and had woven the same silver lace into the braids.  The mirror showed nothing out of place, but she felt like a maid playing dress up.  Dresses were not her usual wardrobe when she was home, but she wanted a change.  She wasn’t sure if it really suited her, but Dorian’s compliments and the fact that Cullen couldn’t keep his eyes off of her changed her mind.   Dorian and Josephine headed down the stairs, but Cullen stopped Evelyn before she could, grabbing her by the waist and nuzzling her neck.  He wanted to steal a moment with her before they had to go meet her parents and the Remarches.  He held her up just a moment more, murmuring in her ear about his plans for getting her out of that dress later, nibbling her earlobe the entire time.  Her perfume was driving him wild, but he let her go before he got carried away.  She caressed his cheek, and took his hand and headed down the stairs.

 


	18. Chapter Eighteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not much to say. Hoping for more comments and suggestion to help me improve. Thanks for all the kudos and comments thus far!

Chapter Eighteen

               Evelyn entered the Main Hall to see Josephine and Warrick leading her family and the Remarches to the war room.  Dorian told her with some amusement that they had been sitting uncomfortably during breakfast, Iron Bull and Varric sitting across from Phillipe the whole time.  Bull kept cracking his knuckles and watching Phillipe eat, and Varric polished Bianca quietly, humming under his breath.  Looking around the hall, she noticed that every one of her dear friends had made an imposing appearance of some sort.  Blackwall was sitting at a nearby table, whittling something with a very large knife, casting glances at Phillipe from time to time.  Solas sat quietly nearby, as did Vivienne, neither doing anything overtly threatening, but their presence alone was intimidating.  Sera sat next to Blackwall, watching him carve, while making loud rude comments in her delightful Sera way.  She saw Cole sitting on one of the statues, watching her instead of the nobles.  Cassandra and even Krem were lounging near the door to the war room as if waiting for something to happen.

               As Josephine led them to the war room, Phillipe kept shooting uneasy glances at Bull and Varric, who both quietly stared back at him until he disappeared behind the door.  Evelyn smiled to herself and made a note to get a round of drinks for all of them on her the next time they were at the rest. 

               Evelyn and the others made their way to the war room, Cullen taking her arm in his as they walked.  As they entered, she saw her mother and father and Phillipe sitting on one side of the table, and she almost lost her nerve.  Cullen squeezed her arm to give her some encouragement and they entered the room and sat at the other side of the table.  Evelyn didn’t say anything- she merely studied her mother, who sat imperiously in her chair as though she were on a throne. 

               “Evelyn, you have some explaining to do,” Elaina began.  “I believe you owe Philippe and his parents an apology for your behavior at the Winter Palace.”  Phillipe sat smugly as if he expected that Evelyn was just going to capitulate.  The look on his face made Evelyn want to rethink Sera’s offer of an arrow to the throat.  And her mother- speaking to her like she was a child.  Evelyn felt the anger start to grow inside of her.

               Evelyn stood up and leveled a glare at her mother. “I owe nothing Mother.  I made my decision very clear in my last letter to you, and I also made it very clear to Osborne when you sent him here to bring me home.  I will not marry him.  I would rather die first.”  She crossed her arms and looked at her father.  “Father, how do you feel about this?  You are awfully quiet.” 

               Phillipe started to interrupt, but Evelyn held her hand up to silence him.  Evelyn continued, looking at Phillipe.  “I have nothing to say to you.  I told you at Halamshiral that this arrangement was over.  I don’t know why you are here, but you are not welcome.”  Phillipe stayed quiet, but looked mutinous.  Now that she looked at him properly, she realized that he was not quite so Cullen-like in appearance as she had thought.  She remembered seeing him when she was sixteen- she thought him very handsome, and could have fallen in love with him if he had given her a chance.  Now, after the humiliation, the years of experience, and getting to know real men, she could see him for the weakling that he was.  Relying on good looks and family money, without ever having an honest day’s work, or even learning from experience did not make for an attractive husband. 

               Bann Trevelyan looked at Phillipe and his parents before speaking.  “Evelyn, I understand that your position here has afforded you some freedoms, but first and foremost, you are a Trevelyan and you have your duties.  Osborne has convinced us that you think you need to stay here for the time being, but that doesn’t mean you can forget your obligation to the Trevelyan name.  We are here to see you marry Phillipe Remarche.  As soon as possible.”  Bann then turned to Warrick, “And you Warrick, will return with us after the wedding, and you will rejoin the Templars.” 

               Evelyn turned to look at Warrick who was watching her for her reaction.  She had finally gotten Warrick out of his Templar armor into something more fitting to the Inquisition, and had persuaded him to stop taking lyrium.  He had not been taking it as long as Cullen had, but there had still been some side effects that he suffered through.  She could not bear to think of him taking lyrium again and ending up addled and damaged.   Evelyn approached Warrick and asked him quietly, “Is this what you want?”   She had come to depend on him for support.  Even though she had the entire Inquisition to do that, there was nothing like family being there too.  She did not want him to go.

               Warrick looked at his little sister.  “No Little Bit.  I’m staying here with you.  I swore my life to you, and I meant it.”  Warrick had spent a lot of time with Cullen when he first stopped taking lyrium and had started taking on more duties- including training of new recruits when not in the field with Evelyn.  He had found a new life here, and even had his eye on Chana, which he knew would horrify his parents if they found out.  He had his little sister back and had come to respect and care for Cullen as a brother, given their shared Templar history, and Cullen’s love for his sister.

               Evelyn turned and faced her parents again.  “As you can see, the younger Trevelyan's are rebelling.  We will both be staying here, and Phillipe will be going home.  Alone.”

               Phillipe finally spoke up.  “Evelyn.  I can overlook your rudeness at the Palace, and I can even overlook your infatuation with this…man”, as he gestured to Cullen.  “However, I will not permit…”

               “Permit,”  Evelyn said bitingly.  “I am the Inquisitor.  The Herald of Andraste.  YOU do not permit ME to do anything.  And that “man” has a name.  Cullen Stanton Rutherford of Honnleath, Commander of the Inquisition.  You will address him with the respect he has earned.”

               Phillipe spit back. “Respect.  He sits there saying nothing.  What respect do I owe him?”.  He looked arrogantly at Evelyn, obviously enjoying talking back to her.  “If he is here to speak on your behalf, he is not doing a very good job.”  He glared at Cullen spitefully, angry that he was not getting his way as he usually did.

               Cullen shifted carelessly in his chair.  “I am not here to speak for her.  I am here simply as a witness, and I suspect to keep her from harming you.  Quite the temper she can have at times, don’t you think?”  Dorian snorted at that and shot a look at Evelyn.  “Evelyn speaks for herself,” Cullen continued.  “She has earned her place as head of the Inquisition through her actions...”

               Bann Trevelyan cut Cullen off with the wave of his hand.  “Yes, yes, we’ve heard all of the stories from Osborne.  It appears she has convinced him to take her side in this matter.  She performs a magic trick of some sort and fools you all into thinking she’s a religious icon…”  When Osborne had told him what Evelyn had been doing these last months, he was unwilling to believe it.  She had always been a quiet and timid little thing, so to hear of all of these stories- closing holes in the sky, facing off against giants, killing dragons, he would not believe it.  This little girl who cried so hard when Warrick left and cowered in the shadows?  Unbelievable.

               “Magic trick?”  Evelyn repeated disbelievingly.  She felt her rage rising.  Alarmed, Cullen noticed that even her eyes were beginning to glow with a greenish hue.  She held her glowing hand up.  “You think this is a magic trick?  You think that I’ve fooled everyone how?  Osborne was right- you are sitting in Ostwick with your heads buried in the sand.  Do you think that Corypheus is going to be satisfied with Fereldan if wins?  He will bring doom upon all the world if he succeeds.  I am the only one who can stop this, whether you want to believe it or not.  I may die in the attempt.  If you think I will spend what days I may have remaining married to him, or sitting in a Chantry, you are sorely mistaken.”

               Elaina, who had been watching her daughter closely all this time, finally spoke again.  “Evelyn.  We have an agreement with the Remarches.  Duty to your family must come before all.  You will marry Phillipe.  By the end of this week.”

               Evelyn stood mute, willing her temper to remain under control.  Cullen has taken her hand in an effort to keep her calm.  Dorian had gripped the chair with both hands to keep the fireball he so desperately wanted to form and throw in his imagination only. She looked at her mother, not with anger, but with sorrow in her eyes.  “Mother.  What have I ever done to earn such disdain in your eyes?  I was never good enough, or pretty enough for you.  You almost destroyed me.  Now I have a life and a chance at happiness, and you want to take that too.  Your past treatment of me, and your feelings for me, however, is a discussion for another time.  The discussion at hand is the annulment of the marriage contact between Phillipe Remarche and Evelyn Trevelyan.  Through the efforts of our diplomatic liaison, Josephine Montilyet, and our Spymaster, Leliana, we have documents here that will nullify the contract due to abandonment by Phillipe Remarche. “

               Monsieur Remarche started to speak, but Evelyn cut him off with a look.  “Before you say that my parent’s letters show that the contract was open for re-negotiation, I can tell you that it does not matter in the slightest.  I, as the injured party in this abandonment, having reached my majority, and by my status as the Inquisitor and the Herald of Andraste, and having the co-signatures of the Left and Right Hand of the late Divine Justinia, have the right to nullify the contract myself.  There will be no reparations made by either family or by myself in this matter.  The only thing left to do is to sign the documents and walk away. If you prefer a more official signature, I am sure that the new Divine will be willing to sign it once she has been appointed,” Evelyn continued.  “Considering that they are looking to the Inquisition to help determine who the new Divine will be, I’m sure I will have no trouble in obtaining that document for you,”  Evelyn smiled sweetly and put a copy of the documents down in front of each family, with a quill and ink.  “Sign it,” she said with finality.

               Dorian choked back a laugh as Cullen looked at her in surprise.  He didn’t know that they had obtained these documents, or if they were even legitimate, but it was worth the look on their faces to see them shut down so completely. 

               “NO!”  Philippe had stood up in a fit of anger.  “This is not fair!   If I would have known who you would be, I never would have run.  She is the most desirable woman in all of Orlais, and she belongs to ME!”  he tantrumed and stormed, flipping chairs over in fits of temper.  Cullen and Dorian had stood up, ready to take him down if he came after anyone. Philippe stormed up to Cullen.  “She does not belong to you.  She is MINE!  I will challenge you for her, and I will win.”

               Remaining calm, Cullen looked at Phillipe with disdain.  “Evelyn belongs to herself.  She is not yours and she is not mine.  If she has chosen to love me, then so be it. I welcome her, and I love her.  But I will never own her.  She is not a druffalo.  She is not property to be claimed and possessed.  You can’t buy her.  You will never understand her, and you will never appreciate her for the treasure that she is.  You only see a deal, a business transaction, and a slave to clean your home and bear your children.” He looked to Phillipe’s parents.  “I strongly suggest you rein your son in before he gets himself in trouble.  He can challenge me if he likes, but I can tell he has never picked up a sword, or done a genuine day's work in his entire life.  My newest recruit could best him.  As for me, I wouldn’t dirty my sword with him.  It’s not worth the effort to clean it again.”

               Phillipe carried on with his tantrum, screaming that Evelyn was his.  All the gold she made in the Inquisition was his, and that Skyhold was his.  Even Bann Trevelyan was staring at him in disbelief as he ranted.  As Monsieur Remarche tried to hold his son back, Bann Trevelyan turned to look at his youngest daughter, and he quietly took the quill and signed the papers.  He may not have felt much towards his youngest, most nobles didn’t as it were, but there was no way he would marry her off to that mad man now.  He had finally come to realize that Monsieur Remarche had only re-opened negotiations so that they could get their hands on the wealth of the Inquisition, and on Skyhold by rites of marriage. 

               Evelyn watched her father sign the documents and turned to Monsieur Remarche.  “Sign it,” she said again.  Monsieur looked away, still holding his raging son back.  Evelyn’s anchor and her eyes flared green again as she stormed up to the table and slammed her hand down on it.  “Sign. It.” She said again.  She flexed her anchored hand again, the green glow deepening in the room.  Cullen and Dorian looked at each other again, panicked that she would lose control and hurt someone, or hurt herself.  They had never seen this happen when she was not in the presence of a rift and it alarmed them both.  Her eyes had begun to glow brighter as well, the green almost completely overtaking the blue.  Cullen quietly motioned to Warrick and told him to go get Solas.  Now.

               Monsieur looked at Evelyn in alarm, and forcing his son to sit, took the quill and signed the documents.  Phillipe started raging again.  “This isn’t over,” he said, shaking in anger.  “You are supposed to be MY wife.  The Inquisition is mine!”  He raged up to Evelyn and grabbed her arm. 

               Before Cullen or Dorian could respond, Evelyn effortlessly removed his hand from her arm and put him in a wristlock before grabbing him around the throat with her other hand.  “Touch me again, you pathetic meat sack, and I will end you.” She slammed him down on the table, holding him there, staring at him as he struggled, her hand squeezing around his neck, slowly cutting off circulation. 

               As she held him there, Solas hurried in and saw the green light flaring around Evelyn while she slowly choked the life out of Phillipe.  Telling Cullen to clear the room, Solas approached Evelyn warily, trying to assess the situation.  As Dorian pushed the Trevelyans and Remarches out of the room, Solas attempted to get Evelyn to let Phillipe go.  Evelyn ignored him as she kept her eyes on Phillipe, who was slowly turning blue from lack of oxygen.  Solas tried again, putting a restraining hand on her arm, and he whispered in her ear, “Lethallan, let him go”.  Solas studied her anxiously as Cullen also tried to calm Evelyn into releasing Phillipe. 

               Evelyn suddenly inhaled and let go of Phillipe, who fell to the floor gasping.  Dorian, disgust on his face, took a moment to cast a healing spell on him before Warrick took him by the arm and pulled him toward the door.  Cullen, his eyes still on Evelyn, who had slumped to the table, told Warrick to make sure the Remarches were escorted from Skyhold and told never to return, and to arrange for the Trevelyans to stay the night.

               The green glow was fading, not only from Evelyn’s hand but from her eyes as well, the green color receding back, her eyes turning mostly blue again.  She was breathing heavily and staring at her left hand, confused.  She looked up at Cullen and Solas, fear in her eyes.  “I…I don’t know how that happened…” 

               Solas took her left hand and studied the Anchor carefully.  He didn’t see anything unusual about it, it looked as it always had.  “I don’t know D’alen.  Has this happened before?”

               Evelyn thought about it.  “Not like this.  I’ve had some flare-ups, but only when I’m in danger, so I always thought that was why it did it.  Now I don’t know.  I was angry, but not really in danger.”  She looked at the others and saw the fear in their eyes and paled.  “I’m sorry,” she said worriedly.   To see her most loved companions be afraid of her scared her more than she could say.  She was even more frightened at what happened to her- the feeling that came over here as she almost choked the life out of Philippe was not normal for her.  She took no joy in killing, but saw it as a necessary evil as part of her duty.  She had felt nothing as she squeezed Phillipe’s neck.  No pangs of regret, no sadness- she had acted almost remotely, almost in a trancelike state.  She was losing herself to the anchor and she didn’t know how to stop it.  What would be next for her?  Would she turn on someone she loved? 

               “Do not worry, Lethallan,” Solas took her hands in his, “It seems that this is happening in extreme psychological conditions, primarily anger and fear.  I will help you keep your anchor under control, very similar to how I helped at Haven.  Come with me.”   At Haven, Solas had somehow brought the Anchor under control, first when Evelyn had received it, and then again after she had attempted to close the breach the first time.  He wondered if her visit to the Fade had caused some recurrence of the Anchor spreading through her body, but that had been weeks ago.  The only signs of change since the Fade had been the night terrors, the gradual changing of her eye color, and the outbursts that led to the execution of Erimond and the almost murder of Phillipe. 

               Solas brought Evelyn back to his living area and examined the Anchor closely.  Muttering under his breath, he ran his hands over it, spreading a warmth as he went.  Evelyn closed her eyes, feeling the anxiety leave her.  She knew that she couldn’t get rid of the anchor, but as long as she could keep it under control, she felt she could handle it.   Solas looked into her eyes and smiled.  “The color has receded for the most part,” he said.  “I would like to accompany you in your next travels so I can observe you in the field.  I would like to make sure it is under control.”

               Evelyn nodded. “We are headed to the Shrine of Dumat tomorrow to track down Samson.  I would welcome your help.  Cullen, Bull, Blackwall and I will be leaving in the morning.”  She was beginning to feel better, and she knew she needed to get back to Cullen and Dorian, so she hugged Solas and thanked him for helping her.   He kissed her on the forehead and sent her on her way. 

               She found Cullen and Dorian waiting in the Main Hall for her- Cullen pacing anxiously, while Dorian sat at a table with Warrick, fidgeting with a mug of brandy.  Cullen spotted Evelyn as she came out of Solas’ room and breathed a sigh of relief. “Evelyn, thank the Maker.  Are you all right?”  He took her by the shoulders and looked into her eyes- and noticed that the color had receded significantly. 

               Evelyn put her arms around Cullen.  “I’m fine.  Solas helped me.  I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you.”  She was relieved, but she knew the day wasn’t over- she still should meet with her parents one last time. She had heard Cullen arrange for them to stay the night, and wondered briefly if they had even stayed.  “Are my parents still here?” she asked him. 

               Cullen cleared his throat. “Um…yes.”, he said hesitantly, “I wasn’t sure if you would want to speak to them again, so I thought it best to have them stay.”  He was second guessing himself now.  He had made a spur of the moment decision when hustling everyone out of the war room, and he hoped she wasn’t angry.

               Evelyn thought about it for a minute and sighed. “I suppose you’re right Cullen.  I should talk to them, and it will have to be today if we are to leave in the morning,” she looked out the door- it was only mid-morning.  “I need a few to clear my head, though.”  She didn’t know what she was going to say to them, or what she should say to them, and she needed some time to think.  “I’m going to go up to my room for a bit.  I won’t be long”.  She kissed Cullen and walked off to her quarters.

               Half an hour later, Cullen came up the stairs to see her.  He knew she wanted to clear her head, but he had found that she often needed someone to bounce ideas off of, to talk things through- even if the other person was silent, and he didn’t want to leave her alone.  She was sitting on her balcony, toying with a water goblet and staring off into space.  He sat down in the other chair and sat in companionable silence with her.  Evelyn, without looking at him, started to speak.  “I think I could sit here for two days and still not think of what to say to them.  The more I think about it, the less I think I have to say.  What would be the point?  Would they throw their arms around me and declare they loved me all along?  Would they be sorry?”.  Cullen didn’t speak.  She needed to sort this out, and he just needed to listen right now.  She looked at him. “I think Dorian was right.   I have to let go of the hope that they will love me.  There are others that do, and some day, maybe I will have children to give the love I never had.”

               Cullen reached over and took her hand.  “Evie, I never thought I’d agree with a Tevinter, but I guess there’s a first time for everything,” he chuckled.  “You are strong and brave.  I’ve seen you change so much in the last several months, and it makes me proud.   People here love you, more than you know, and we are all here for you- to be your family.  So what is there to say to them then?”

               Evelyn squeezed Cullen’s hand and then moved over to sit on his lap.  She snuggled into him as he put his arms around her.  “I suppose I’ll let them speak and just wing it then,” she said.  Sighing, she put her arms around Cullen.  “Maybe I should get this over with then.”  She remained sitting on Cullen’s lap.

               Cullen chuckled.  “Well, if you want to get this over with, you should probably get up.”  Evelyn snuggled closer.

               “Yup. Getting right on it,” she said.    She remained sitting where she was, enjoying every moment of closeness to him.  “I’m on the move,” she said, still not moving.  She started kissing along his jawline and nibbling on his earlobe. “See?  I’m leaving now…” she said again, staying right where she was.

               Cullen started laughing as she started kissing his lips.  “I can see how quickly you’re moving,” he said.  He circled his arms around her waist, stopping suddenly.  “Are you…not wearing a corset?” he asked, as he finally noticed.  Evelyn pulled away, grinned wickedly and brought his hand to her breast.  “No breastband either?  You naughty little…”  The thought that she met her parents this morning while wearing no smalls made him want to take her right now, but he knew that she had to talk to her parents first.

               Evelyn kissed him one more time and got up.  She smoothed out her dress and went into her room to check herself in the mirror.  Cullen came up behind her and put his hands around her waist again.  “You are so beautiful my love.  Anyone who says otherwise is a fool.” 

               Evelyn leaned back into him as she felt his arms around her.  “You make me feel beautiful Cullen.”  For the first time in her life, she didn’t feel a pang of disappointment when she looked in the mirror.  The dress colors set off her complexion and was so becoming on her, that she felt she needed to write a note of thanks to the seamstress, or give them a bonus or something.  Chana had done a miracle on her, she thought.  Dorian and Vivienne and the rest of her companions had given her something she never had before- self-confidence, self-esteem, a feeling of belonging.  She thought back to how all of her companions had appeared at breakfast this morning, and how they took up for her.  She was ready.

               Evelyn started her way down the stairs when Cullen stopped her for a moment.  “Evie, can I ask what possessed you to not wear your smalls under that dress today?” 

               Evelyn grinned.  “Bull dared me,” and she continued on the stairs. Cullen, shaking his head, followed her down.

 


	19. Chapter Nineteen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Not much to say on this one. Given the overall theme of this fiction, I struggled with this. I didn't want to draw it out too much, but I think it's a little on the short side. In the long run, I felt that there really wouldn't be much to say, and I knew from the beginning that there would be no happy bittersweet familial reunion with the parents. So if this were me, I wouldn't have much to say either. Hope you like it.

Chapter Nineteen

               Evelyn’s confidence almost left her as her mother looked her over.  “Evelyn, what have you done to your face?” she asked furiously.  Even though it had been proven that the Remarches were only renewing the marriage contract in an attempt to get their son as the head of the Inquisition by marriage, she was still angry that the contract had failed.  Monsieur Remarche had promised her a great deal of gold after the wedding, and she was bitter about losing her little nest egg. 

               Evelyn looked coldly at her mother.  “They’re tattoos mother.  I had some done after we lost people at Haven and the rest done after Adamant when we lost Hawke.  It serves as a reminder of what we are fighting for every time I look in the mirror.”  Elaina rolled her eyes and threw her hands up in the air.  Hopeless, the girl was hopeless.

               An awkward silence filled the air for a while before Evelyn spoke again.  “So Osborne told you everything?”  She knew that he would, but was interested in what their reaction was.  Her father had waved it off during the meeting, but she wasn’t sure if that was a heat of the moment remark, or if he truly didn’t believe his own son.

               Bann Trevelyan answered.  “Yes, he told us everything.  You have to excuse us for finding it all a little hard to believe.  The Evelyn that we know doesn’t have the gumption to do all of the miraculous things that Osborne told us of. Our girl hides in the shadows and stutters like a fool.”  Cullen stood up when he said that.  Evelyn put her hand on his arm, Cullen remaining silent but glared at Evelyn’s father angrily. 

               Quietly, Evelyn looked at her father.  “I’m not that girl anymore Father.  That girl started to die when Clancy taught me to use a dagger.  When I saw my people die at Haven.  When I fell into the Fade for the second time.  I was never your girl.  I was cattle.  A possession to be traded for pretty trinkets.  An ego boost to you for “uniting the nations” as you liked to think of it.”

               “As well you should be,” snapped Bann Trevelyan.  “Duty to family, when you are a noble born, is everything.  You had your role in this family, and you failed…”

               “Wrong, Father.”  Evelyn turned to see Warrick standing in the doorway.  He came in, watching his parents warily, “You failed her.  Sixteen years old, and you march her off to Lydes to marry a perfect stranger?  And then when the spoiled brat runs off, you blame her? And now, after all, this time, she has a chance at happiness, and you try to marry her off again.  You didn’t even think that family may have had some kind of ulterior motive in renewing their interest, you just blindly accepted it and almost threw her to the wolves.  Why can’t you see that in spite of you, she is the best of us?”

               Bann Trevelyan stood mute.  Elaina glared at her son.  “The best of us?” Elaina asked bitterly.  “Since she was born, she was a disappointment.  Plain, boring, almost forgettable.  She had no personality…”

               Cullen could remain silent no more.  “How can you say that about your own daughter?  How can you be so obtuse to the situation?  She has saved the lives of countless people.  The people here love her, worship her, and are willing to die for her.  Not because of her mark, or her title, but because she is kind and humble and loving.  How can you not be proud of her and support her?”  Cullen glared at both of the Trevelyans, willing them to speak, to change their minds about this precious woman.

               Elaina regarded Cullen imperiously.  “Someone of your obviously sub-standard upbringing would not understand,” she said.  “To be a noble is a major responsibility.  She should have aspired to be better than she was.”

               “I’m right here Mother.  You don’t need to speak like I’m not here.  What more could I have done for you?  I excelled at my studies, I did everything I could to please you.  The things about me that you found to be a disappointment were things I could do nothing about.  I couldn’t change how I looked, I couldn’t make you love me.” Evelyn threw her hands up in the air.  “I don’t know why I am even talking to you about this.  I can’t change the past. You have no interest in changing the future, and I don’t think I do either.  I can accept that you feel nothing for me, and I am useless to you now since I refuse to marry anyone of your choosing.  My life is here, with Cullen, Warrick and the rest of my people.  You are welcome to stay the rest of the evening. We will have our usual dinner this evening which you are welcome to come to.  I will be leaving in the morning on Inquisition business.  I am assuming that you will not be here when I return and will return to pretending I do not exist.”

               With as much dignity as she could muster, she left the room, Cullen and Warrick following behind.  She stood in the courtyard, pondering what she wanted to do next.  Dorian approached, a questioning look on his face.  Evelyn didn’t say anything and hugged Dorian closely.  Bull was close by as well, waiting near Dorian and watching out for Evelyn.  She turned to give him a hug, and he picked her up and slung her over his shoulder, carrying her into the tavern, where everyone was waiting for her.  Evelyn didn’t say anything about what happened, but most everyone had an idea that the wedding was off, judging from the unceremonious manner in which the Remarches left.  When they reached the tavern, Bull put her down and slapped her on the behind.  “Come on Boss,” he said, “drinks are on Phillipe Remarche!”  Evelyn looked at him confused.  Bull looked at her and winked, “Sera may have picked his pocket on their way out…”

               The first toast was to the wedding being off.  The second toast was to Evelyn.  After they all drank to Evelyn’s honor, Bull made the third toast.  “And to the Inquisitor not wearing smalls when meeting her parents.  That took some major balls!”  Evelyn blushed and drank as the crowd roared.

               After a relaxing afternoon at the Rest, everyone made their way to the main hall for dinner before going their separate ways for the evening.  The Trevelyans ate quietly and retired for the evening, without a glance at their daughter.  Evelyn and Cullen ate and had a few quick hands of Wicked Grace with Varric and Sera.  After stopping for brief conversations with various groups still in the main hall, Evelyn and Cullen made their way to her room to retire for the evening, but not before Cullen made good on his promised plans to get Evelyn out of her dress.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> On a side note, I have to compliment the "Grammarly" program- I have an absurd fondness for commas apparently and that program helps me sort out my grammatical issues. Too bad I'm too cheap to spring for the upgrade.


	20. Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty

               While the trip to the Shrine of Dumat was not as successful as they hoped, they managed to get ahold of Maddox’s tools for Dagna.  While they were waiting for her to do her research, Evelyn went with Vivienne, Varric and Blackwall to the Exalted Plains to investigate what was beyond the bridge that the Inquisition had rebuilt, and had now returned to Skyhold after a three-week journey.

Evelyn hated the Plains.  It was so hot and desolate- all she wanted was to get to her room, have a bath and find Cullen, maybe not necessarily in that order.  Everyone was exhausted.  Varric looked about ten years older than he was and even elegant Vivienne was looking rumpled and weary.  Evelyn looked up- she could see the light in Cullen’s office- he was still at work.  She smiled to herself and planned on finding the first person she could to run and tell Cullen they had arrived home. He worked so hard, and she loved him for it.

Everyone was so focused on their homecoming that they didn’t notice the assassin cloaked in the growing darkness. They had entered Skyhold and had dismounted by Master Dennet when the assassin struck, leaping out of the darkness and sinking two daggers into Evelyn’s back.  Before anyone could react, Cole appeared in the midst of them and attacked the assassin.  Blackwall rallied quickly and rushed to help Cole subdue the assassin while Varric and Vivienne caught Evelyn and lowered her to the ground.  Vivienne attempted to heal the damage the assassin caused, but her magic was almost exhausted.

The guards sounded the alarm and everyone came running.  Blackwall, who had the assassin pinned yelled to Cole to get a healer.  Varric was trying desperately to staunch the bleeding while Vivienne dug for a potion and tried to get Evelyn to drink.  Evelyn lay soundless, her skin turning whiter by the second, the fear and pain showing in her eyes before she lost consciousness.  Varric picked her up and started to carry her over to Healer’s tent.  Cullen came hurrying down from his office after hearing all the commotion, turning pale when he saw Evelyn bleeding in Varric’s arms as he carried Evelyn to the nearest pallet in the courtyard and laid her on it.  Healer started her administrations but was pushed out of the way by Dorian and Solas, who had both been retrieved by Cole. 

               Cullen stood taking the entire scene in.  Blackwall and the guards were taking the assassin to the cells to await questioning by Leliana.  Dorian and Solas were working feverishly over Evelyn.  Varric and Vivienne were slumped on a nearby bench, still covered in Evelyn’s blood.  Cullen rounded on them, “What happened?”  he demanded. 

Varric looked up at him wearily.  “I don’t know.  He came out of nowhere…” 

               Silently, Cullen turned around and watched the scene before him.  The time for questioning would come after he knew Evelyn would live.  Dorian and Solas were muttering under their breath, their hands glowing white over her injuries.  Behind him, he could hear Healer praying and other residents of Skyhold exclaiming and wondering.  Solas looked up at him.  “We need to move her.  Somewhere cleaner with more light.  The blades were poisoned- every time we heal her the wounds open again.” 

Cullen nodded. “Let’s get her to her room,”  Cullen said. Solas signaled for a stretcher and had Evelyn gently placed upon it.  Cullen followed behind them, wanting to stay by Evelyn’s side.   

One of the healers placed a hand on his arm and gently stopped him.  “Let us do our job, Commander.  We will get you when it’s time”.   Cullen hesitated, and then nodded.  He desperately wanted to be there, but he knew he would just be in the way.  He sat at a table in the main hall and prepared to wait.

_Pain.  Pain beyond pain.  Evelyn tried to focus and remember what happened- but couldn’t get beyond looking at Cullen’s window, and then next, seeing Varric’s face as he carried her.  What happened?  Why was she in so much pain?  Evelyn retched and screamed.  She felt strong hands holding her down and heard Solas’ calming voice in her ear.  “Calm Lethallan, we will help you. Dorian and I are here.  You have been poisoned- we are trying to determine the origin so we can give you the antidote.  Please be as still as you can”.  Evelyn writhed but tried to stay still.  She felt a gentle hand on hers and felt Cole’s presence comforting her._

Leliana approached Cullen as he waited for news- Warrick and the remaining companions had joined him by that time.  “Commander,

\his knives have the traces of Concentrated Demonic Poison and Soldier’s Bane on them.”   

The table fell silent- this was bad. “Do they know upstairs?”  Cullen asked shakily.  “Do they know what it is?”

Vivienne, who had recovered and was on her way up to the Inquisitor’s chambers to help replied “I will let them know Commander- do not fear” as she walked by.  She was carrying several flasks and vials, as was a healer’s assistant who was hurrying behind her. 

Sera broke the silence “Is someone going to bloody explain this? What the hell is all that shite?”  Nobody spoke for a moment. 

Varric sighed “I’ve heard of those.  Not good on their own.  As a mix- even worse.  Concentrated Demonic Poison attacks the spirit- the soul.  Soldier’s Bane attacks health and stamina.  I’ve never seen the two mixed together- but I can imagine the effects.  Evelyn was already exhausted when she was attacked- the poisons will make it almost impossible for her to fight the effects- her spirit will break and she will give up and die. “

_Fear.  Evelyn was back in the fade facing the demon- watching it cut Hawke down.  Her fault.  Back at Haven surrounded by the dead.  Her fault.  Watching demons hurl Blackwall and Sera’s dead bodies to the ground before cutting Leliana down.  Her fault.  The Divine.  Her fault.  The dead soldiers at the Breach.  The dead soldiers in the Storm Coast.  Her mind kept cutting to the same horrible scenes- all the death, all the destruction- all because of her.  If she just slipped away, it would all be better…_

 Cullen stood up so suddenly that the chair he was sitting on tipped over.  He couldn’t just sit and wait- he needed to do something.  He needed to be near her.  Before anyone could stop him, he bolted up the stairs to Evelyn’s chambers, Warrick following closely behind him.   He made it up the stairs to see Solas and Vivienne quickly mixing up different flasks of potion and Dorian sitting on the bed near the woman he loved.  Dorian was running his hands over her bared back, the white light casting a glow on her skin.  Evelyn was staring blankly into the distance- staring without seeing.  Cole was crouched next to the bed, holding her hand and looking into her eyes.  Normally, Cole would be muttering incoherent thoughts, but he was silent- lost in his bid to help.

_Evelyn was walking through battlefields.  Watching Solas’ friend, the Spirit of Wisdom dying again.  The dying soldier helped by Cole.  The Conclave.  As she kept flitting around all of the horrible memories, she felt her resolve slipping.  She felt Cole’s hand in hers- a comfort, a help- but the feeling was fading fast._

Cole started. “Reliving the pain of the past.  Her fault.  She can’t remember the good things.  I.  Can’t.  Help.”  Agitated, he looked at Dorian. 

Cullen rushed forward and took Evelyn’s hand from Cole’s.  He kneeled next to the bed and pressed Evelyn’s hand to his lips.  “Help me Cole”, Cullen said.  “Help me bring her back”. 

Solas approached with a flask in his hands.   “Commander, I need to apply this to the Inquisitor’s wounds.  It will not be pleasant.  I need you and Dorian and Warrick to hold her down.”  They readied themselves- Cullen kept hold of Evelyn’s hand, and gently took hold of her shoulder.  Solas poured the liquid over the wounds- Evelyn writhed and let out an unearthly scream and then went still. 

Solas studied Evelyn intently as they all watched the poison being leached out of the wounds in her back by the mixture.  She was still deathly silent, staring at nothing.  Cullen anxiously kept hold of her hand, stroking her hair, silently willing her to wake up.  The room was quiet as Cole looked into her eyes.  He shook his head and got closer to her.  “I think I can help now,” he said. 

                   _Haven.  This…this is Haven.  Evelyn recognized the place immediately. But Haven is gone.  Why am I here?  She walked into the temple, but it was deserted.  Solas brought me here once, did he bring me back again?  The door opened behind her, and Cole walked to her, holding out his hand.  “They are waiting for you to come back.  They don’t want you to hurt anymore.  Take my hand.”_

_Evelyn looked at Cole doubtfully.  “It’s all my fault.  All of the death, all of the destruction.  I can’t go back.  I don’t deserve it.  My parents tried to tell me that all of my life- that I wasn’t worth it, I wasn’t worthy of love.  They were right- all I do is disappoint and destroy.  I can’t go back.  More will die if I do.  They are better off without me.”  She dropped to her knees.  “Just leave me here to die,” she said dully.  She looked at Cole again.  “They always say that when you die, there is a bright light and the loved ones who went before come to take you away.  Who comes for me?  I see no light, no one to love me and take me on.  Am I even unworthy of that?”  She sat, silent and staring, watching the same painful memories over and over again, growing unresponsive to Cole’s calls._

_He was next to her in a split second, in her face, trying to get her to move.  Evelyn remained motionless, unseeing and unhearing.  Cole could hear her memories and her pain, growing ever larger as the despair started to overtake her.  “NO!” he shouted, bringing his hands up, cupping her face as though to kiss her.  He brought Evelyn into his embrace, willing the despair to leave, showing her flashes of memories of the people who love her._

_Warrick, putting a snake in the tutor’s bed.  Charlotte sharing a book and laughing at the rude drawings someone had drawn in the margins.  Clancy fitting a dagger into Evelyn’s hand and showing her the throwing motion, smiling in pride as she hit the target.  Cassandra and Evelyn giggling over Swords and Shields.  Leliana and Evelyn exclaiming over shoes at Halamshiral.  Josephine and Evelyn talking for hours on her balcony.  Varric staring at her over a hand of cards, trying to figure out what’s different.  Vivienne nodding in approval from her balcony as Evelyn enters the room.  Bull hoisting Evelyn over her shoulder as he carries her to the Rest.  Sitting with Sera on a roof and eating cookies.  Blackwall, telling jokes and carving on a stick while Evelyn grooms Brutus.  Solas, holding her arm and kissing her on the forehead, always gentle.  Cole, sitting with her at dinner, unseen and unfelt, but helping, because of her.  Dorian- holding, hugging, smiling, always there, holding up swatches of clothes, running fingers through her hair, calling her Cousin.  Cullen. Oh. Cullen.  Caressing her cheek, kissing her on the battlements, strolling arm in arm talking, laying her on the desk, making love to her, adoring her every moment he can.  Brief flashes of so many others- people she helped.  Nameless people whose lives were improved by her- by finding food, warm clothes, closing rifts, finding lost beloved items, too numerous to count._

_Evelyn watched the parade of people as Cole showed her, unmoving.  When he got to Dorian, she gasped.  When he got to Cullen, the tears came.  As he showed her the rest- the nameless and various people who she affected, she watched, crying.  “That was you,” he said.  “They love you.  Not because of what you did, but because of who you are.  Compassion.  Kindness. Bravery.  That is what they see. They want you to come back.  Don’t leave them.  Don’t leave your family.”_

_Evelyn reached to take Cole’s hand, but hesitated, still unwilling and unable to shake off the despair that overwhelmed her.  “So tired, Cole,” she said, “So tired.” She could tell that he could not force her back, that she needed to go willingly, and something in her was still fighting to stay where she was.  She tried to think of her friends again, all of the good things she had come to know since joining the Inquisition.  She knew she still had work to do- work that would exhaust her and break her if she wasn’t careful, but it had to be her.  She had to save the world, for her family and for her love.  She took Cole’s hand and said,“Take me back, Cole.”_

It had been hours since Solas treated Evelyn with the healing potion.  She had laid there silent and unmoving, barely breathing, Cole next to her as if in a trance.  Cullen and Dorian had not moved from her side, in spite of the healer’s encouragement to let her be.  Warrick was nearby, refusing to leave as well. Cullen knew he would not be able to rest until she had at least shown some sign of improvement.  As he held her hand and prayed over her, he felt her move slightly, squeezing his hand.  Her eyes came into focus as she drew a sharp intake of breath, panicking at the pain she felt.  Cole came to as well, petting her hair and talking quietly into her ear.  Dorian quickly looked over her back and started to try to heal her wounds again- now that she was awake and the poisons had been drained out, he might be able to close the wounds off for good this time.  Cullen released Evelyn’s hand reluctantly so he could make room for Solas, who was helping Dorian with healing spells. 

                   As Dorian and Solas finally managed to heal Evelyn’s wounds, Vivienne brought over a restorative draught she had made and bade Evelyn to try to drink it.  Evelyn found she could not sit up yet- in spite of Dorian’s and Solas’ efforts, she had lost a lot of blood and was very weak.  Vivienne fed her spoonfuls of the draught as Cullen went downstairs to update people on what was happening.  He entered the main hall to find everyone still seated, waiting for new.  Varric, still in his bloody armor, was dozing in a chair, as was Blackwall. Everyone else was conversing, playing cards, reading, all looking at the door from time to time, willing it silently to open, and for a good report.  Cullen told them that they had managed to get the poison out and heal her wounds and that she had awoken, but was very weak.  They couldn’t be sure of the long term effects yet- that would have to wait until Evelyn had gotten some rest.  Varric and Blackwall were especially relieved.  They both felt at fault for her injury- that assassin had slipped past them and hurt her.  Varric asked if they could see her.

 


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters tonight. I kind of took a chance on this whole assassin thing- I actually had written part of this as a one-shot and decided to incorporate it into this instead. Maybe she should have killed the guy when she had the chance...

Chapter Twenty One

                   It was a hard night for Evelyn.  Even though she was out of danger physically, and Cole had brought her back from wherever the demonic poison had taken her, she was still not out of the woods yet.  Vivienne had gone to bed, exhausted, but Solas, Cullen, Dorian, Cole and Warrick remained with the healer at Evelyn’s side.  She had regained consciousness long enough to be spoonfed some restorative draught by Solas, and to be checked over, cleaned up and dressed, but had dropped off again soon after.

                   Cole watched her as she dreamed.  He had been able to help her get out of her own torture, but he could not do anything about her dreams.  Evelyn had asked him to bring her back because she knew that even though she could not escape the feelings that everything happening was her responsibility, she knew that she could make it right.  But that did not stop the dreams and the doubts from creeping in.  There had been so many years of harsh criticism, self-doubt, loneliness, and humiliation, that the newly emerging confidence and courageousness she had discovered could not overcome it.  The poison had left her body but had done the damage.

                   Cullen had not slept at all, watching her, smoothing her hair, quiet anxiety etched on his handsome features.  Exhaustion crept through his body, but he knew he would not be able to sleep until she woke up.  From below, he heard the door open and someone coming up the stairs.  As Leliana appeared, Cullen rose from his place next to Evelyn’s bed and approached her.  “Is there news?” he asked her quietly.  He knew that she had agents questioning the assassin and that after getting the news that Evelyn was out of danger, had gone to see to the questioning personally.

                   “The Remarches.  The assassin is an Antivan Crow- I have some contacts that will come in handy in this situation- they can provide us with the contract.”  She had already sent her messenger birds to these contacts and expected she would have the evidence within the week. “The question now is do we leave this to Orlais to sort out, or do we take care of it ourselves?”

                   Cullen’s mouth drew into a tight line.  He had always favored a direct approach, not wanting to play the game, so this answer came easily.  “We take care of it ourselves.”  With a glance back at his sleeping Evelyn, he and Leliana headed down the stairs and headed to the War room.  Josephine followed along, and they quickly discussed the best way of arresting the Remarches.  Josephine wanted to go the diplomatic method and approach Orlais to assistance, but both Cullen and Leliana were in favor of a quicker approach, in case they fled, or in case Orlais insisted on handling the situation themselves.  In the end, they decided to let Leliana handle it with her contact and bring them back to Skyhold.

                   Cullen wearily walked into the Main Hall, looking at the assorted people lingering, some waiting on news, some eating breakfast.  Varric was waiting by the door to Evelyn’s quarters, looking undecided as to whether or not he should go up, and Blackwall was waiting at a nearby table.  Both had left to get a few hours sleep, but it was a restless sleep, and both had come back to wait at almost the same time.  After speaking with Varric and Blackwall for a few minutes, reassuring them that they would get to see her as soon as she was strong enough, he went back upstairs.  Someone had brought up a tray of food for everyone, but no one had really touched it yet.  It seemed as if everyone was waiting until she woke up to even breathe. 

                   A few hours later, Evelyn awoke, confused.  Cullen rushed over to the bed to help her sit up while Solas and Healer looked her over.  The wounds on her back had healed, but she was still feeling some pain.  She was very weak, and emotionally, she felt like she never wanted to move again.  She wouldn’t speak, or even look anyone in the eye, even Dorian, and Cullen.  They all looked at each other unsure of what to do when Cole spoke up.  “She’s afraid.  The poisons are gone, but they left the fear behind.”

                   Solas tried to get her to drink a restorative draught, but she turned away.  He smoothed her hair away and she flinched violently away from him.  Solas smiled briefly and got up from the bed.  He handed the bottle to Cullen.  “You may have more luck.  I am going to go rest for a while- send someone if you need me.”  Cullen nodded and turned to Evelyn.  He watched her as she sat in bed, looking down at the covers.

                   “Cole, what can we do? What does she fear?” he asked anxiously.  Cullen was afraid to touch Evelyn because it would kill him if she flinched away from him too, and he hoped that Cole would be able to help her.  _Maker, please let her overcome this,_ he prayed to himself. 

                   Cole looked at Evelyn again.  “She fears she is still in her dream.  Failure, hurt, loneliness, shame, death.  She thought Solas was the tutor who beat her, coming for her again.”  A tear trickled down Cole’s cheek as he saw the beating through his mind.  “He broke her rib.  She didn’t tell.”

                   “WHAT?” Warrick sputtered.  It must have happened after he left for Templar training because he was sure that she would have come to him. His heart broke, knowing now that he had left her behind without any defense.

                    Cullen had an idea and went to speak quietly to Warrick.  “Go to her.  Call her Little Bit, and just talk to her.  Not about her past.  Just talk to her.”  Maybe if she heard loving names from people she knew loved her, she might come around.  Since Warrick was from her childhood and loved her most at that age, he might be that breakthrough.

                   Warrick approached the bed.  “Hey Little Bit, what’s going on?”.  He sat down but did not touch her.  “Glad to see you awake, you gave us a bit of a fright.”  She stirred a little bit and looked up.  “Come on Little Bit, we need to give you a drink of this and get you something to eat.  Maybe we can take a walk later, see Brutus yeah?”  Evelyn looked at him but didn’t respond.  Warrick reached out to take her hand, and she let him.  Warrick smiled and squeezed her hand, but she still didn’t speak.  “Will you take a drink?” Warrick asked her, “it will make you feel better.”  Evelyn looked at him, and looked at the bottle, but would not drink. 

                   Warrick looked at Cullen and Dorian.  “It’s a start,” Dorian said.  He came to sit on the bed too.  “Cousin, please come back to us.  We love you and believe in you.  Please don’t be afraid, we are here.”  Evelyn shifted a little, a tear falling down her cheek.  She looked doubtfully at Dorian but did not flinch away as he wiped the tear from her eye.  She exhaled when she felt his hand on her cheek.  She remembered him, and Warrick.  She remembered what Cole showed her in her poisoned world to bring her back.  Evelyn wanted to believe that this wasn’t a dream, but she was afraid they would turn into something horrible, saying loving words to believe and then turning on her.  She started shaking her head, her anchor flaring as she started to panic.

                   Dorian and Warrick started to back off, unsure of what to do next.  Cullen came back to the bed and took her face in his hands.  “Evie, come back to me.  Please.  I love you so much. I’m real, I’m here and I love you.”  He kissed her on the forehead and then kissed her lips.  He pulled away and looked into her eyes.  “I need you with me, Evie.  This is not a dream my love.  You’re awake, and you’re here with me, and Warrick and Dorian.  Cole is here too.  Everyone is waiting for you. Please stay with me.”  The tears came to his cheeks as he tried to get through to her.  “Evie, don’t leave me.”  He closed his eyes and move forward to touch his forehead to hers. 

                   Evelyn reached up and felt his tears on her face.  Tears.  This was real.   She brought her hands to Cullen’s face.  “Cullen?”  she whispered weakly, “not…not a dream?”  She pulled away and looked into his eyes.  “Not a dream?” she asked again. 

                   “No my love, I’m real,” Cullen said.  He kissed her again.  “I’ll always be here for you, we’ll always be here.”  He moved to pull her into his arms, and she let him.  She relaxed into his arms, her strength waning and her anchor was diminishing.  Cullen looked over to Cole.  “Go get Solas and Healer please,” he said to him.  In an instant, Cole was gone.

                   A little while later, Solas and Healer both came running up the stairs.  Cullen had shifted so his back was against the headboard and Evelyn was cradled against his side.  She was still awake, a little color had come back to her cheeks after she drank the draught that Dorian offered her.  She sat up when she saw Solas and stuttered an apology.  Solas shook his head. “No need, D’Alen.  Cole explained it to me.  There is nothing to be sorry for.” 

                   Healer looked over Evelyn’s back again and found it to be well healed.  There would be some soreness, and she would need to rest for a while to regain her strength, but she would make a full recovery.  Solas came to sit on the bed near her so he too could check her over, and she surprised him by sitting up and hugging him.  Even though Solas had waved off her apology, she couldn’t believe she had flinched away from him, gentle Solas.  The one who helped her with her anchor, who healed her, who told her of the wonderful things he saw in the fade.  Solas sat back and looked at her.  “Thank you Lethallan.  I’ll leave you to rest.  I’m glad I got to see you looking better.”  With a caress to her cheek and a nod to Cullen, Solas left. 

                   Healer was fussing over some potions in the corner, making a sleeping-draught for Evelyn.  She brought it over to her.  “Here my dear, you need to rest again, restore your strength.” 

                   Evelyn shrank back. “I…I don’t want to go to sleep again.  What if I can’t get out of it?” 

                   Cullen brought her back to his side and looked at the healer, “Perhaps we should wait a bit- maybe see if she’ll take some nourishment.  Leave the draught in case we need it, but we’ll take things as we can.”  The healer nodded.  “I’ll have something sent up- some broth perhaps,” as she headed down the stairs. 

                   A little later, one of the kitchen maids came up with a tray of food for everyone and took away the tray from that morning.  Cullen brought the broth to Evelyn and helped her with it, pleased to see more color coming back to her as she sipped slowly.  Dorian and Warrick ate a little as well.  Both were reluctant to leave her yet, and Cullen was reluctant for them to leave as well.  He wasn’t sure what the rest of the day would hold- whether or not Evelyn would rest.  He was beginning push himself too hard and it was a matter of time before lyrium withdrawal took hold.  He would not leave her, but he needed to rest.  He handed the bowl of broth to Warrick and went to get a little something to eat.  He kept his eyes on Evelyn while he ate, sending a prayer of thanks to the Maker for bringing her back.  Evelyn finished her broth and laid back on the bed. 

                   She was very tired but was still afraid to fall asleep.  She looked at the sleeping draught sitting on the table but rejected it.  Too deep of a sleep could be more harmful to her, preventing her from waking if she needed to.  She looked over to Cullen and her heart dropped.  He looked so tired, and like he might have a headache.  She didn’t know how long he had been up, but if she knew him like she thought, she doubted he slept at all. 

                   She looked to Dorian and Warrick- they both looked tired too.  “I think I should probably try to sleep again.  Dorian, why don’t you and Warrick go get some rest?  You both look exhausted.  Cullen can stay with me.” 

                   Warrick looked doubtful. “Little Bit, are you sure.  It’s been a rough time for you. Let’s at least post a guard at the door downstairs in case there’s a problem.”  Evelyn agreed.  Dorian and Warrick both kissed her goodnight and went off to get some sleep.

                   When they had left, Evelyn looked at Cullen.  She was still weak, and she worried that if Cullen were to have a lyrium withdrawal episode, she would not be able to help him.  “Come to bed and rest with me, love.”  She wanted to hold her arms out to him, but she just couldn’t.  Cullen smiled at her and got ready for bed, undressing down to his smalls and slipping into bed. 

                   He put his arms around Evelyn and snuggled down with her.  “I thought you didn’t want to sleep again,” he said quietly, “are you all right?”

                   Evelyn, with the last of her strength, reached up to rub his temples for a moment.  “I’d rather risk the bad dreams and rest with you then watch you suffer.  You’ve been at my side this entire time. I can’t do much to take care of you right now, but I can rest here with you.  I can tell you have a headache.  You need to sleep.”

               Cullen nodded.  She was right of course, a headache had started a few hours ago, and he had been ignoring it.  He could feel the ache starting to go into his joints, but he kept his arms around Evelyn protectively as they both fell asleep.


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another attempt at smut. Also some abuse of a child as told in a story. If you feel I need to add warnings or something let me know.

Chapter Twenty Two

                   Within a few days, Evelyn was able to get out of bed and walk around a little, her strength returning.  She still felt strained and doubts still lingered, especially in her dreams, but Cullen was always there to help her.  Cole would pop in from time to time as well when he felt she was in particular distress.  Dorian and Warrick were constant visitors, and Varric and Blackwall finally were able to see her as well.  They both came in, emotion showing in their eyes at seeing Evelyn alive, apologizing for failing her.  She held their hands and told them that there was nothing to be sorry for.  She missed it too, they had all been tired and they had all missed it.  Since she was up for it, they played a few hands of Wicked Grace while Cullen looked over reports at Evelyn’s desk.    He had barely left her side since the attack, leaving only to take care of his basic needs and to meet occasionally with Leliana looking for news on the Remarches.  It was only a matter of time before they were apprehended, and Cullen was afraid that the agents would miss them- but all they could do was wait.

                   After Varric and Blackwall left, Warrick spoke up.  “Little Bit, how much do you remember?”  He had been thinking about what Cole had said and it still bothered him greatly.  He needed to know what had happened to her after he left for the Templars, “Do you remember what happened with Solas?”

                   Cullen and Dorian both gazed at the two of them.  They were curious too about her life after Warrick left- Cole’s revelation about Evelyn’s reaction to Solas had shocked them, but they hadn’t wanted to ask her about it.  Warrick had always felt so protective of his little sister, and he couldn’t sit by and not know what had happened to her.  She rarely spoke of that time, except for what she had needed to tell.           

                   Evelyn looked down that her hands that were clasped in her lap.  She remembered her reaction to Solas, even though she had just woken up.  Solas had told her there was nothing to forgive, she still felt terrible about flinching away from her beloved friend.  She remembered when he brought his hand up to touch her, he morphed into that man.  She had had her share of cruel tutors- more cruel ones than nice ones, especially the Orlesian tutors.  People who had been paid to teach, but pretty much left unsupervised and given a free hand in their work.  Occasionally Mother or Father would look in to make sure they were doing what they were paid to do, and had witnessed some terrible treatment, but their belief was that hardship made one stronger, so they did not intercede.  And if Evelyn would have come to them to tell them what had happened, she would have been punished again.

                   Warrick came and sat next to Evelyn and took her hands.  “Come on Little Bit.  I need to know.”  He knew it wouldn’t change anything, and he was really afraid of what he was going to hear, but he remembered what he saw when he was still at home and able to help her a little.  What he feared most when he left for the Templars was leaving her unprotected. 

                   Looking down at her lap, Evelyn started to speak.  “They started hiring tutors when I was four.  Reading, music, history, Orlesian customs, running a household- all the way up until I was sixteen.  Some of my tutors were kind, and I lived for those moments.  Some of them were only mean- cuffing me on the head, striking me on the hand, throwing away one of the few toys I had as a punishment for some mild infraction…”  her voice trailed off.  Cullen, who had put aside his reports, rose from the desk and came to sit at Evelyn’s feet, listening as she spoke.

                   Evelyn continued.  “There was one in particular- he was maybe about thirty I think, and he was bald.  He had the deadest eyes I had ever seen, and the way he would look at me,” Evelyn shivered at the thought.  “His name was Hugh- I never knew his last name.  He was…sadistic.  He would find new and interesting ways to punish me if I did something wrong, and he was unpredictable about it.  Something I did right once would be wrong the next time.  Bruising me where it wouldn’t show, putting things in my food, making me drink “potions” that he would mix, and then beating me if I got sick.  Threatening me with worse if I told. Eventually, he started…touching me.  Here,” she said, indicating her breasts.  She started to tremble as Warrick put his arm around her, looking sick. 

                   “One day, I got mad and sassed him.  I don’t know what made me do it, but I just got so angry, I couldn’t help it.  I will never forget the look that came over his face that day.  It was the moment he had been waiting for.  He started to beat me hard with a cane, all over my back and sides.  I lost count of how many times he hit me- he finally stopped when he heard the bone crack.  He had broken one of my ribs.”  Evelyn unconsciously started rubbing her side as she spoke.  The room was dead silent.  “I managed to get to the stables, and the Stablemaster wrapped my ribs for me.  I was in so much pain I didn’t sleep for a week. And I still had lessons with him.  I had no one to go to- the Stablemaster felt sorry for me, I could tell, but he had no authority.  I noticed, though, that there was always someone close by after that- one of the male workers of the house always seemed to have “business” nearby when it was time for my lesson with Hugh.  He never got an opportunity to be alone with me again, which I thanked the Maker for.  I saw how he looked at me.  It was only a matter of time before the abuse got worse.  Hugh finally left after he realized that while my parents weren’t onto him, the household staff was and that his fun time was over.”  Evelyn continued to stare at her lap, afraid to look at anyone. 

                   Warrick was the first to speak.  “Oh, Little Bit…”  He didn’t know what to say.  He resolved to speak to Leliana the next chance he got to see if there was a way to track Hugh down and make him pay.  He tightened his arm around Evelyn.  “I am so sorry,” he said, “I wish I had been there for you.”  The thought of someone beating his sweet little sister that way, and possibly doing worse if he hadn’t been caught brought tears to his eyes. 

                   Cullen and Dorian too were both deeply affected by Evelyn’s story.  It was something to add to all of the other horrible things she had told them about her life.  It wasn’t fair- she could die before this was over, without really having begun to live.  She had finally gotten a start to a happy life, and Cullen determined that he was going to do whatever he had to do to make sure it stayed that way if they made it through this. 

                   Evelyn finally looked at all of them in turn.  “I think he was the reason that I learned to fight back.  I didn’t want to let anyone have that kind of power over me again.  I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about it before.  You know enough about embarrassing things about my childhood, I didn’t want to burden you with this too, especially since there is nothing that can be done to take it away.”

                   Warrick squeezed his sister to him and then stood up.  “I love you Little Bit, that will never change.  I have some duties to attend to.  I’ll come back tomorrow.”  He left, immediately heading to Leliana to see what could be done about tracking down a certain tutor.  Dorian got up to hug Evelyn too and took his leave. 

                   This left Evelyn with Cullen, who was still sitting at her feet.  She was tired- still recovering from the attack and its aftermath, and she was worried about what he thought of her story.  He hadn’t said anything yet but had sat thoughtfully as she had talked.  She knew now to not be worried when he grew quiet like this, but she wanted him to speak, to reassure her that he was all right.  They sat for a while before Evelyn reached out to touch Cullen’s shoulder.

                   At her touch, Cullen looked up and smiled at her.  He so desperately wanted to take her burdens away from her, to give her a life she deserved.  He knelt in front of her, his hand gently rubbing the side she where her rib had been broken.  He kissed her gently before pulling away to look into her eyes.  “Evie, I swear to you that I will give you the life you deserve.  If I could, I would take you away right now.  You will never have to think of your parents or that man ever again.”  He kissed her again, more fervently, wanting to take her pain away.  He stood up and took Evelyn’s hands in his, pulling her up to him, and slid his arms around her waist. 

                   Evelyn melted into Cullen’s embrace, kissing him back with all she had.  She was tired, but she needed him.  He had stayed with her constantly, holding her when she needed it, and he brought her back from the brink.  His hands went to the belt around her robe and started to untie it, easing the robe off of her shoulders.  He nibbled down her neck before murmuring in her ear, asking if she was all right and if she was strong enough for this.  In response, she started untying the laces to his breeches and slipping her hand around his member.  Cullen growled and picked Evelyn up, carrying her over to the bed.  He gently seated her at the edge of the bed and knelt before her, undoing the buttons to her nightgown, kissing down her chest as he revealed her smooth skin.  She brought her hands to his head as his mouth found her breast, his tongue flicking lightly over her nipple, making her moan.  He peeled her gown down her body, raising her hips up so it dropped to the floor before sitting her back down again.  She reached for the hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head before pulling Cullen to stand before her, her hands reaching for the laces of his breeches again, untying them completely, and pulling his pants down.  Her hand went to his length, as she gazed up into Cullen’s eyes.  He returned her gaze, his eyes hungry for her before they closed as her mouth enveloped his cock.  She took him in as far as she could before she slowly started to go back and forth along his length, her hands on his hips, her tongue circling his length as she sucked.  Cullen’s breathing grew ragged as she worked, feeling the pleasure building around him, but he stopped her.  Questioning, she looked up to him as he started to lightly push her back onto the bed.  He lay down next to her as he guided her back further onto the bed, running his hand over her body.  He looked into her eyes as he brought his hands back to her side where Hugh had broken her rib, before bringing his lips there, before coming back to her breasts. 

                   Evelyn couldn’t get enough of him.  When he latched onto her nipple again, she felt her whole body clench with need.  Cullen kissed down her body, pausing before his tongue found her center, making Evelyn gasp as he found her nub and worked it, driving her into a frenzy.  He kept his eyes on her as he dragged his mouth along her folds as her hips rocked against him. Cullen brought a hand to her breast as he dragged his tongue the length of her, teasing and kissing her clit as Evelyn moaned his name.    She arched her back as she climaxed, Cullen working her as she rode out her orgasm and she was lying limp and sweating.  He came up to nuzzle her neck as she lay panting, her arms encircling him, holding him closely.  After a few minutes, Evelyn kissed Cullen while pulling him on top of her, wrapping her legs around his waist.  He lined himself up with her center and slowly entered her, both of them moaning at the feeling.  Evelyn felt so good as he entered her, so warm and tight around his cock, it was all he could do to not slam into her immediately and make her his again.  Cullen started to move slowly, pulling almost completely out of her before pushing all the way back in. Evelyn’s hips bucked as he pushed all the way in, grinding against her sex before pulling almost all the way out again.  Cullen continued to move inside of her, gaining speed as the pleasure overtook them both.  He took Evelyn’s leg and moved it to his shoulder as he continued to move inside her, keeping one hand on her leg and his other hand on her clit, his thumb stroking it as they moved together.  Evelyn’s fists clenched the sheets as she thrust herself towards him, wanting to feel him deep inside of her, that sweet ache again forming in the pit of her stomach.  She felt herself building again as Cullen shifted position a little, hitting every spot inside of her that gave her pleasure.  “Oh Maker, Cullen, don’t stop,” she gasped as she felt herself going over the edge.  Cullen groaned and ground himself into her as deeply as he could until Evelyn came again.  Watching her writhe, calling his name, as she came hard, Cullen could not hold back anymore.  Letting go of her leg, and collapsing over her, he started to slam into her as he clutched her tightly, driving into her with brutal force.  Evelyn’s tongue found Cullen’s ear as she whispered to him, “Come for me Cullen, my love.  Come for me.”

                   Cullen groaned again, and shifted a little and took her.  He moaned her name as he fucked her hard, feeling her thrusting against him, her hands all over him, exploring as she whispered what she wanted him to do to her in his ear.  He cried out as he spilled his seed inside her, his body jerked against her as waves of pleasure washed over him.   He moved inside her a few more times before pulling out and collapsing next to her, spent and panting, his arm flung around Evelyn’s waist.  They lay quietly together for a while before Evelyn cuddled into him and put her arm over him.

                   As they lay together, Evelyn looked at him.  “You know what you said before, about giving me the life I deserve?  I want the same for you so badly.  You have been through so much in your life, and I want to give you the life you deserve too.”  Her fingers traced along his chest as she spoke, “I know you’ve barely left my side since I was attacked, you’ve taken care of me through my nightmares, I can’t even list off everything you’ve done for me.  I want to do the same for you.”

                   Cullen tightened his arm around her.  “You already have Evie. More than you know.”  He kissed her again.  Evelyn snuggled against him sleepily, enjoying his warmth as they drifted off to sleep.

 


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I skipped ahead a little in the story- after attempting to write about the Arbor Wilds, I just couldn't make it work without being boring or regurgitating more of the story everyone already knows. In my playthroughs, my Inquisition always drinks from the Well. Not sure why- aside from Morrigan is way too eager and it makes me nervous. I'm not the biggest Morrigan fan- I don't hate her, but she's just not my favorite. I think it's because she says 'tis a lot and it annoys me. I never understood Solas being mad- he doesn't want Morrigan to drink, he won't drink. What other choice was there? I don't think there is an option to allow it to be destroyed. Thanks for all the kudos and comments. I really appreciate it. As always, any criticisms or heck, praise is welcome. I like to feel the love too.

Chapter Twenty-Three

                   Dorian was reading in his usual chair when he was startled by angry voices coming from Solas’ room.  “Why did you do it?  I warned you not too.” Solas said as he advanced on Evelyn angrily.  Dorian ran over to the railing and looked down at the scene, concerned.

                   “Solas,” Evelyn said pleadingly.  She had made the decision to drink from the Well of Sorrows in place of Morrigan.  After the events at the Temple of Mythal, she didn’t trust Morrigan to be forthcoming with the knowledge that could have been gained.  She had asked for Solas’ opinion at the time, and he also didn’t trust Morrigan and refused to drink from the well himself, so she was confused as to why Solas was so angry with her.

                   Solas continued, getting in Evelyn’s face.  “You gave yourself into the service of an ancient Elven God!”  Dorian started to come down the stairs to intervene.  He knew that Solas loved Evelyn and cherished her friendship, but the look in his eyes made him think that Solas was going to strike her.

                   “What does that mean exactly?”  Evelyn asked him, reaching out to Solas in an effort to calm him.  Solas looked at the worry, sadness and exhaustion in her eyes and tried to calm himself down.  He had to make her understand the consequences of her decision.

                   “You are Mythal’s creature now.  Everything you do, whether you know it or not, will be for her.  You have given up a part of yourself.”  Solas and Evelyn continued to argue as Dorian entered the room.  As Dorian stood watching the situation, Solas calmed himself down.  “I suppose it is better that you have the power than Corypheus, which leads to the next logical question.  What will you do with the power once Corypheus is dead?” 

                   Evelyn was silent for a while.  It hurt her to see Solas angry with her, but she couldn’t change the past and she couldn’t regret her decision.  She really didn’t know what she would do beyond finishing Corypheus, or if she would even succeed.  “The war proved that we can’t go back to the way things were,” she finally said. “I’ll try to help this world to move forward.”

                   Solas wrinkled his nose.  “You would risk everything you have in the hope that the future is better.  What if it isn’t?  What if you wake up and find that the future you shaped is worse than what was?”  Evelyn watched Solas, thinking of all the times he had helped her, all the times she helped him.  She thought of how her life had turned out, and what still lay ahead of her.

                   “I’ll take a breath, see where things went wrong and try again,” she said to him.  She couldn’t think of any other way. 

                   “Just like that?”  Solas asked. 

                   “If we don’t keep trying, we’ll never get it right,”  Evelyn answered.  If there was one thing that she learned from her history tutors, it was that history often repeated itself.  She was still young and idealistic enough to hope that this could change.

                   Solas smiled.  “You’re right. Thank you,” he said finally. 

                   Evelyn looked at him, confused.  “For what?”

                   “You have not been what I expected Inquisitor.  You have…impressed me.  You have offered hope that if one keeps trying, even if the consequences are grave, that someday, things will be better.”  He smiled, and then looked down.  “Forgive my melancholy.  Corypheus has cost us much.  The Temple of Mythal did not deserve such a fate.  The orb he carries, and its stolen power, that at least we still may recover.  With luck, some of the past may still survive.”

                   Evelyn smiled tremulously.  “Thank you, Solas.  We couldn’t have done this without you.” 

                   “You are welcome,” Solas smiled.  Dorian exhaled, relieved that this situation had defused itself as Solas and Evelyn hugged. 

                   This was not the first confrontation Evelyn had had after the Well of Sorrows and judgement of Samson.  Sera and Cullen both were not happy with her, for choosing to drink from the well, and for making Samson serve the Inquisition by telling everything he knew.  She had already managed to calm Sera down, but Cullen was still angry at her.  After everything that had happened to her- the anchor and her losing control over it, the changing of her eyes and personality, the nightmares after Adamant, and the recent attack that had almost destroyed her soul as well has her body, Cullen couldn’t believe that she had chosen to drink from the Well and add to her troubles.  He had confronted her about it when she came to his office.

                   “Cullen, Morrigan had lied to us when we got there- she read the translations and withheld the information to her advantage.  How can I trust that she would tell us everything she hears?  I just don’t trust her, and we need every chance we can get if we are going to beat Corypheus.  Solas wouldn’t drink, we couldn’t let Morrigan, and we certainly couldn’t let Corypheus have it.  Please, don’t be angry with me. I made the best decision I could.” she pleaded with him.

                   “You keep taking these chances on yourself, not knowing if this will be the one that kills you,” Cullen retorted.  “Is this what you want to become?  The all-powerful figurehead?  All power and glory to you?”  He rubbed his forehead, wincing as his headache worsened.  “Making up for the attention you never got as a child? You had to be the one to drink from an unknown magical well when someone more qualified was there to do it for you?  Is that what you wanted…Inquisitor?” he asked her angrily.

                   Evelyn reached out to him, trying to take his hand.  He recoiled from her, looking at her coldly.  “Stay away from me,” he shouted as he turned away. 

                   Evelyn slumped against the wall, taken aback at Cullen’s anger and hateful words. She had been watching people stare at her and she had heard the whispers since their return.  Most of her friends had given her a wide berth, even Cole.  Blackwall, even though he had been the first to help her after she came back from wherever the well had taken her, wouldn’t even look at her when she came to groom Brutus.  She had never felt more alone in her life at that moment.  “I’m sorry,” she whispered as she turned to leave. 

                   For the first time in a long time, Evelyn began to feel the doubt creeping in again.  She knew she had to see this through until either she or Corypheus was gone, but how could she when everyone hated her?  She climbed the stairs to her quarters and collapsed to sit in the middle of the room, staring at nothing.  She replayed the scene at the well over and over, wondering if she had done the right thing.  Something didn’t feel right to her.  Cullen had never raised his voice in anger to her before, even when he completely disagreed with her decisions.  She had noticed him rubbing his forehead, the tension in his jaw and shoulders…Oh, Maker, why hadn’t she seen it?  She got up and made her way quickly back to his office.  Cullen had collapsed near his desk and she couldn’t wake him.  He was in full lyrium withdrawal- something she hadn’t seen for a long time.  Frantically calling for a guard to watch over him, she ran to find Bull- probably the only person who could help get him to his bed.  She burst into the Rest, grabbing Bull by the arm and begging him to help her.  Bull followed her to Cullen’s office and stopped short, shocked to see the Commander collapsed and unconscious.  “Please Bull, help me get him to bed so I can take care of him,” Evelyn pleaded to him. 

                   Bull picked him up and hoisted him over his shoulder- taking him up the ladder and putting him in his bed.  Evelyn had sent the guard to get a list of supplies- luckily, she had kept some supplies in his room from the last time, but she needed a few more things.  As she waited, she watched him lay so still, wondering if he had meant the things he had said to her, or if it was the lyrium talking.  She didn’t think she could bear to find out if he truly felt that way yet-so she decided that she would care for him until he rested peacefully and leave before he awoke.  She would need to wait until she was emotionally stronger to find out the rest.

                   Bull helped Evelyn get set up- she could see he was upset, but she tightened her jaw and didn’t say anything.  She was completely focused on Cullen, and without looking at him, thanked Bull for the help and told him that she would be all right- she knew what to do.  “You know where to find me if you need me, Boss,” he said as he descended the ladder. 

                   When the supplies had been delivered, Evelyn tended to Cullen as she had done before.  Poultices, massages, warm and cold cloths- all tended with gentle loving hands.  Maker, she loved him, and she had destroyed it.  She cried as she tended him, wondering if this would be the last time she would be able to do so.  Hours passed as she gently washed him and watched over him, waiting for the fever to leave him so he could rest easy.  Finally, Cullen seemed to sleep easier, his breathing was normal and he seemed more comfortable.  She kissed him on the forehead, whispering of her love for him and left.

                   It was then, as she trudged wearily to the castle that Solas confronted her.  After Solas had finally accepted her explanation and they had found some peace, Evelyn left his room towards the main hall.  Dorian stopped her, looking at her carefully.  “Cousin, what is going on?  Have you slept at all since your return from the Wilds?”

                   Evelyn didn’t say anything. She couldn’t bear to hear any more anger or bitterness directed at her- she didn’t want any more lectures.  She was pretty certain that Cullen didn’t want anything to do with her anymore, Morrigan was angry, and even though Solas and Sera were both calmed down, their initial anger at her cut her to the bone.   She didn’t want to hear it from Dorian too. 

                   “Evelyn,” Dorian grabbed her by the shoulders and forced her to turn to him, “what is wrong with you?”  Dorian could see the shadows under her eyes, and her slightly shaking hands.  He had heard what had happened at the Temple from Bull, and he had also overheard a few things around the castle as well, which he knew would affect Evelyn very much if she heard them too.  He was annoyed with these people.  The poor girl was doing the best she could, and if there was one perceived slip, it seemed they were ready to throw her to the wolves. 

                   “Just let me be Dorian.  No one can help me right now.”  She pulled herself out of his grasp and continued walking.  Entering the main hall, Evelyn hesitated for a moment, fearful of the looks and whispering she was about to hear.  Agitated she headed for the outside.  She didn’t want to check on Cullen- she couldn’t bear to face his anger again, and she didn’t want to wait around for it either.  Making a decision, she went to find Bull.  “Gather your things, we’re going to tame a dragon.”

                   She found Blackwall and Solas and told them the same thing before running up to pack some of her things.  As she finished putting on her armor, Dorian came up the stairs.  “Where do you think you are going, Cousin?  You need to be resting, not leaving again.” Evelyn didn’t answer right away.  She slung her pack and daggers over her shoulder and started heading for the stairs.  “Evelyn, talk to me.” Dorian pleaded with her, “don’t leave like this.  Tell me what happened.”  He followed her down the stairs, trying to get her to talk. 

                   As she headed out the door, she turned to Dorian, wiping a tear from her cheek.  “Dorian, I have to leave.  I need to think, away from this place.  The best thing for me to do now is to get a step closer to ending Corypheus- I’m going to tame the dragon.”  She hugged Dorian tightly.  “I know I can’t ask you not to worry, but I need you to do something for me.  Please.  Watch out for Cullen- the lyrium is giving him trouble again- he may need help.  And please find anything you can to help him beat the withdrawals.  Talk to Josephine and Leliana, use whatever Inquisition resources you need to help him.”  She kissed him on the cheek.  “I have to go,” she said, crying as she walked to the stables.

                   As they left Skyhold, she prayed Cullen would find peace and forgive her.

 


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What the heck- may as well go for three in one night. More smut- not a whole lot. I'm up to over forty chapters so I figured I'd better start posting more.

Chapter Twenty Four

                   Evelyn had made her way to the Altar of Mythal as Morrigan had told her.  She didn’t talk much on the way there, keeping to herself, and avoiding the curious glances her companions threw her way.  As they camped one night, one of Leliana’s messenger birds found them.

                   _Cousin,_

_I don’t know what in damnation is going on, but the whole castle is in an uproar over your leaving.  Cullen will not say what happened, but he barely leaves his office and will not speak to anyone either.  He recovered from his recent episode, I think.  Every time I check on him, he is sitting at his desk writing and barely looks up.  I don’t know what he is writing, but there are balled up pieces of paper all over his floor.  If something happened between the two of you, you need to come back and fix it.  He’s a wreck, just as you are, I suspect._

_On another note, I have put out some more queries about lyrium addiction and have found some possible leads. I will keep following up as quickly as I can.  Please come home soon Cousin.  I’m very worried for you._

_Love,_

_Dorian_

                   Evelyn’s breath hitched.  She had spent every waking moment reliving their argument, and those moments were plentiful because she had barely slept.  As they continued on their journey, she spent time with Solas, begging him to help her learn to listen to the voices of the well.   There was not much he could teach her, but he spent a few evenings helping her as best he could.  The rest of the trip she spent trying to control the voices so she could hear them.  She had some minor success, but the combination of her heartbreak, lack of sleep and extreme duress did not help. 

                   “Patience, Lethallan.  It will come with time and practice,” Solas said, smiling gently.  “Will you tell me what’s wrong now?”  Solas looked at Evelyn with concern.  “You have barely spoken, and we left Skyhold in such a hurry.  I can see you are hurting- will you talk to me?”

                   Evelyn looked away.  “No Solas.  I’m not ready to talk about it, but thank you.”  A tear slipped down her cheek. Solas smiled and wiped her tear away.  The tightness in her chest had not gone away since Cullen had told her to stay away from him, but she was afraid to say anything out loud.  If she did, it would make it real.  As Solas left to get some rest, she continued to listen to the voices and try to work them out.  It was better than the alternative.

                   They arrived at the Altar of Mythal the next day, geared up to get the job done.  After a brief fight, Evelyn approached the dragon.  Bull, Solas, and Blackwall all watched as she walked up, green light enveloping both her and the Dragon.  After a few minutes, the dragon backed off and flew away, but she knew that the dragon would come once when called.  Evelyn thought Bull was a little disappointed that they didn’t kill it, but he got to fight one for a while, so he was mollified for now.  She made a mental note to find one they could kill soon to make him feel better.

                   Evelyn dawdled a little on the way back, trying to prolong their return without anyone noticing. As they camped one night, after Solas and Blackwall had gone to sleep, Bull sat down by her and looked at her expectantly.  “Come on now Boss.  You have to spit it out.  What is going on?”  Evelyn tried to look away, but Bull took her by the chin and made her look at him.  “Whatever this is, it’s eating you up on the inside.  You’re not sleeping and you’ve been sick several times. You need to talk about it before it poisons you.” 

                   Evelyn finally broke.  She told about how angry Cullen was that she drank from the well, and what he had said to her, and that he had told her to stay away from him.  She also told about going back that night to nurse him through his withdrawals, but she couldn’t face him when he was awake.  Bull listened to her and then took her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles as he thought a while.  “Well Boss, I’m not exactly an expert on relationships, but I think that you two need to talk this out.  I think it was the lyrium and fear talking, and I don’t think he meant a word of it.” 

                   Evelyn shook her head.  “But what if he did?  He’s the first person I’ve ever loved, that ever loved me, and I don’t know if I can bear it if he meant it.  I can’t change what happened at the Temple, and he hates me for it.”

                   “Hey, I was there with you remember?”  Bull said.  “You did the best you could.  No one else could have pulled it off.  You’re my little badass remember?  Come on Boss, let’s pick up some speed tomorrow and get you home.   Fix things with Cullen.  I really don’t think he meant it- he’s nuts about you.  Come on now- let’s get some shut-eye.”

                   A week later, they arrived back at Skyhold.  After a meaningful look from Bull, Evelyn went up to her quarters to clean up.   She called for Chana to help her dress because her hands were shaking so badly.  She wasn’t sure if it was because of her nerves or because she hadn’t slept much in the last few weeks. 

                   A messenger had arrived to let Cullen know that the Inquisitor had returned, making his heart turn over.  He was devastated to learn that she had left so suddenly before he had regained his strength and was able to find her.  He remembered with shame every single terrible thing he said to her before everything went dark.  When he awoke the next day, he had been in bed, cleaned up, the remnants of the poultices and cloths evident- he knew that Evelyn had taken care of him, in spite of what he said. 

                   After she left, he wrote letter after letter, telling her how he felt about her, and how sorry he was, but it just didn’t come out right.  He got up and started pacing his office, trying to decide what to do next.  He wanted to go to her, but he was convinced she would not forgive him.  Bull came to see him after they returned urging him to go find her.  “Hey Cullen, what are you waiting for?  Go talk to her.”

                   Cullen shook his head.  “She won’t want to see me.  She must hate me now.”   He wanted to go find her to at least apologize for the horrible things he said, even if it was the last time they spoke.  He would understand if she never wanted to speak to him again.

                   Bull shook his head.  He was not experienced in relationships, but he knew people.  He saw two people who loved each other desperately but were unable to trust themselves and their feelings.   Evelyn and Cullen had both gone through much in their lives, destroying their self-esteem and self-confidence in the process, making them both feel unlovable and tainted in their own way.  Neither had learned that love was possible when people weren’t perfect and that it would take more than one bad night to tear them apart.  “Cullen, do you really think she hates you?  Who do you think took care of you that night? Would she do that if she didn’t love you?”

                   Cullen sighed.  “I guess we’ll see.”  Steeling his courage, he started to walk to her quarters.

                   Evelyn stood before her mirror, studying herself after Chana left.  She had lost a lot of weight, and she looked so tired.  She counted back to the Arbor Wilds and realized that it had been almost a month since then, a month in which she had only slept a few hours each night.  As exhausted as she was, she knew rest would have to wait.  She went to stand before her desk and look over the papers stacked there, reading a few reports.  As she read, she heard someone coming up the stairs, but she didn’t turn around.  She knew it was Cullen, and a stab of fear hit her heart.  Cullen hesitated at the stop of the steps, unsure of what to do.

                   “Evelyn,” he said quietly.  She froze, unable to breathe. She was afraid to turn around and look at him, afraid that this was the end.  “Evie.  Look at me,” Cullen said, “please.”  Evelyn turned around, trembling, looking at the floor, a tear falling from her eye. They stood silently, unsure of what to do next.  Cullen broke first, rushing towards Evelyn in long strides and falling to his knees before her.  Tears in his eyes looked up to her.  “Evie, forgive me,” He took her hands in his and kissed them, “Please forgive me.  I swear to you I didn’t mean the things I said.  I would give my life to take them back.”

                   Evelyn collapsed to the floor, shaking violently.  “Do…do you hate me?” she whispered, afraid to hear the answer.  She couldn’t forget the look on his face when he had torn his arm away from her.  “Have you stopped loving me?”  She closed her eyes, waiting for the answer.

                   “Never.  Evie, I love you.  I never stopped loving you,” He kissed her hands again, holding them to his lips, closing his eyes before asking, “Have I ruined things?  Have I ruined…us?”  He held his breath as he waited for her response.  She hadn’t pulled away from him, so he dared to hope a little.

                   Evelyn, still trembling violently, breath hitching slightly, finally said, “I just don’t understand.  The things you said had to come from somewhere.  Is that how you see me- an attention-seeking glory hound?  I never wanted any of this, and I had thought that you, of everyone here, knew that.”  She couldn’t look at him.  She had barely thought of little else on the way home, wondering if deep down, he was right. 

                   Cullen shook his head.  “Of course, I don’t think that.  I had been hearing people talking about it during our travels, and listening to Morrigan at the war table didn’t help either.  Then the headaches started and it just came out.  It’s not the first time I’ve lashed out and said awful things during a spell- I just don’t know how to stop when the memories overtake me.  I’m so sorry Evie.  I could never think anything bad of you, my sweet loving Evie. Please, forgive me.”  He bowed his head over their clasped hands, sobbing. 

                   Evelyn’s chest felt so tight that she could barely breathe.  She clung to Cullen, whispering words of forgiveness in his ear as he remained bowed before her.  She brought her hands to his cheeks and raised his face so she could look into his eyes.  The pain and sorrow and regret in his eyes, his tear stained cheeks, her heart broke. They looked into each other’s eyes for a long moment before Cullen crashed his lips to hers, kissing her furiously.  He kissed her like he had never kissed her before, all of his fear, and longing, and love deeply rooted in the passion he felt for her.  Evelyn responded eagerly, returning Cullen’s kiss with an intensity that left her breathless.  She gasped when she felt his tongue on hers, exploring her mouth, her neck as his hands roamed restlessly over her body before picking her up and putting her on the desk.  Evelyn started untying the laces on Cullen’s breeches, releasing his erect member as Cullen pushed her skirt up around her waist and tore her smalls apart.  Frantic with need, Evelyn wrapped her legs around Cullen’s waist, not wanting to wait another minute to feel him inside of her.  Cullen didn’t waste any time, bracing himself on the desk as he entered her fully, crying out from the pleasure of it.  Evelyn crashed her lips against Cullen’s again as he pulled himself almost all the way out and slammed into her again.  As Cullen moved inside her, he kept up a constant litany in Evelyn’s ear of how much he loved her, how beautiful she was, how much he wanted her. Evelyn felt herself getting close to the edge.  She had loved it the times they had made love in the past, but this was so different, so intense and frenetic that it consumed her completely, her arousal pushed to the brink.  Cullen circled her nub with this fingers as he continued to fill her.  Evelyn came with a cry, clinging to Cullen as he played with her, helping her ride out her orgasm as long as possible, before giving in to his own pleasure.  Cullen cried Evie’s name as he spilled his seed inside of her, before collapsing into her arms.  They lay together on the desk, panting from exertion, Cullen kissing Evelyn everywhere he could reach. 

                   Noticing that the desk was a little uncomfortable, Cullen picked Evelyn up and carried her over to the bed.  They took some time to finish undressing before getting under the covers and wrapping their arms around each other.  They lay together quietly for a while, just enjoying holding each other before Cullen made love to her again, making it last longer this time, but with just as much passion and need as before.  As they lay entwined after, Cullen traced his fingers along Evelyn’s body as she finally dozed off, before finally falling asleep himself.

                   Evelyn awoke the next morning to find Cullen bringing up a breakfast tray for the two of them to share.  He had noticed that she was much thinner than normal and that alarmed him.  He put the tray on the desk and came over to kiss Evelyn good morning.  “Come eat something love,” he said to her as he grabbed her robe for her to slip on.

                   As they ate, Evelyn told Cullen about the dragon at the Altar of Mythal and how she had tamed it.  She also told him about how she authorized the use of Inquisition resources to find a way to help with lyrium addiction.  Cullen went silent when she said that, still agonizing over what had happened between them during his last episode.  Evelyn took his hands, trying to reassure him that all was forgiven.  “It’s not just for you, my love,” she explained.  “It’s for Warrick or any other Templar who decides they want to stop.  We need to be better prepared for it, and we need to be able to be effective.  I don’t want to lose you to this, and I don’t want to lose Warrick either.  He’s been pretty good so far, but I worry.”  Cullen squeezed her hands and smiled.

                   When they had finished eating, Cullen pulled Evelyn onto his lap and held her close.  The anxiety he had felt since Evelyn had left for the Altar had not worn off, and he couldn’t help but want to be close to her. Evelyn relaxed into his arms and just enjoyed the moment as they talked about their plans for the day.  Cullen did have a few duties he needed to handle, but they both needed to rest after their last tumultuous few weeks.  Cullen convinced Evelyn to lay back down for a while and promised he would be back later.  He blew her a kiss as he headed down the stairs.

                   Evelyn lay back down and thought about the last twenty-four hours and how much things had changed.  She had gone from being fully convinced that she and Cullen were over to loving him more than she thought possible.  She heard the door open and someone bounding up the steps and looked to find Dorian at the top of her stairs.

                   “Cousin, I just wanted to check on you.  I’ve been very worried,” he said as he came to sit by her bedside.  He had seen Cullen leaving, looking very content, so he was hoping that whatever had been troubling the two of them had been resolved.

                   Evelyn looked up as Dorian approached and smiled.  Probably the first smile he had seen from her in a while.  “I’m ok Dorian.”  She told him about the events leading up to her leaving for the Altar of Mythal, and that Cullen and she had worked it out.

               They talked about what research had yielded for lyrium withdrawal and addiction- Dorian how found a former Knight Commander who had been working on the same problem and had agreed to join forces with the Inquisition.  Hopefully, with more resources, the research could be expanded on, and a solution found quickly.  The recurrences of Cullen’s episodes were decreasing, but when he had one, it was severe, and Evelyn was deathly afraid that it would kill him.


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wanted to cover the final battle, but not go into too much detail since I've been trying to avoid blow by blows of the main scenes. So this isn't very long- but I didn't want to completely ignore it.

Chapter Twenty Five

                   A few days after Evelyn returned from taming the dragon, the skies opened up again and Corypheus made his move.  Evelyn had just enough time to hold Cullen close for a moment before mounting Brutus and hitting the road- this was the moment that they had been building up to for months.  He watched the bridge for a long time after they left, as did Leliana and Josephine before they all headed to the chapel to pray.  Cullen had never felt more helpless in his life, and he had wished he could have gone along to fight by her side, but he needed to stay behind with the troops in case Evelyn failed, the second line of defense. 

                   Evelyn and her companions reached the Temple as quickly as they could, jumping headlong into battle on their way to Corypheus.  As they made their way to the final confrontation, Corypheus tore the ground, elevating the temple to the heavens, bringing Evelyn, Solas, Blackwall and Bull along for the ride.  After the temple had stopped, Evelyn finally faced him.  She was ready.  She had been fighting, and training and scheming this whole time, just to lead up to this moment. 

                   As the dragon flew to attack, the dragon that Evelyn had tamed at the Altar came flying in- the dragons crashing together in battle.  In the fray, Evelyn and her companions attacked Corypheus, hacking, burning, freezing anywhere and everywhere they could.  They chased him through the temple as he kept finding higher ground.  As they battled, Evelyn saw the dragons clash together falling to the ground, her dragon coming out the loser, and the other flying to join his master.

                   As Evelyn watched the dragon, Corypheus seemed to disappear, leaving the group to confront the dragon itself.  Bull swung his ax, roaring a challenge, and lead the attack.  As many dragons as this group had taken down, they were well practiced. Even though Evelyn’s dragon had done quite a bit of damage already, the red lyrium dragon was still a powerful adversary.  As they hacked and slashed their way, Evelyn released the mark over the dragon, doing a considerable amount of damage.  Blackwall and Bull took advantage of the that and stormed in for the final battle.  All four warriors jumped in and made the final kill, the dragon to the ground, taking a final breath before dying, the piece of Corypheus that was hidden in the dragon leaving its body to find its master.

                   Evelyn looked at her beloved companions.  None had been injured too terribly- cuts and scrapes.  She held her hand out, all of them grasping together in solidarity before heading up the stairs to finish this once and for all.  Corypheus kept flitting around the battle, leaving everyone a little disconnected, before Blackwall started using his grappling chain to keep ahold of him. 

                   Finally, Corypheus stood in the center of the field, the Orb floating above him.  He used the power to hit Evelyn’s companions, knocking them back and putting them down the for count.  Evelyn looked at her friends and thought of her friends on the ground and back at Skyhold, and of Warrick and Cullen.  Her anchor flared to life as she approached Corypheus, who was distracted by the orb and his prayers to Dumat.  Evelyn held up her anchored hand and watched as the orb flew into it, bringing with it the power that Corypheus had been attempting to release.  As he fell to his knees, Evelyn lifted the orb to the skies, focusing the power on finally closing the breach for good.  As the breach closed, Evelyn dropped the orb on the ground and took her final steps to Corypheus.  She walked up to the broken magister, “You wanted into the fade?” she asked him as she released the anchor directly over his head.  He writhed in pain as he collapsed in on himself with the rift closing around him.  After his disappearance, the temple started to collapse as it dropped to the ground.  Everyone ran for cover as the temple hit the ground, and then there was silence. 

                   Evelyn roused herself, looking around at the temple and looking for her friends.  She saw Solas approach the pieces of the orb, and pick it up, a look of regret on his face.  “Solas?” She approached him as he knelt on the ground.

                   “The orb,” Solas said, sorrow heavy in his voice. 

                   Evelyn didn’t know what to say.  “Are you sure?  We could take the pieces. Try to…”

                   Solas interrupted, “That would not recover what has been lost.”  He put the pieces down and stood up, facing his friend.  The look of sorrow on his face broke Evelyn’s heart.

                   “There’s more, isn’t there?” she asked him.

                   “It was not supposed to happen this way.  No matter what comes, I want you to know you shall always have my respect.”  Solas said, despair plain in his voice.  Evelyn wanted to stay with him and talk everything out, but Cassandra was calling frantically looking for her.  She approached her friends, seeing the relief on their faces that she and all of them had made it alive.

                   She turned again to talk to Solas, only to see that he had disappeared.  She felt apprehensive, but she remembered that he had gone off by himself after his spirit friend had died- she hoped he would turn up at Skyhold like last time.

                   She and her friends set out for home.  Finally.

 


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another short one.

Chapter Twenty Six

                   They came home to a hero’s welcome, everyone in Skyhold were gathered in the courtyard, clapping, cheering and waving at the warriors as they walked in.  Evelyn climbed the stairs to where Leliana, Josephine, and Cullen were waiting, smiles on their faces.  They bowed to Evelyn before she collapsed into Cullen’s arms, holding him close.  He took her by the hand and lead her to the same spot she had stood all those months ago when she had taken the role of the Inquisitor in the first place.  She looked over the crowd as they cheered, squeezing Cullen’s hand, and wanting nothing more than to take him upstairs to her quarters.

                   After the celebrations had ended, business went on as usual at Skyhold.  Evelyn knew that there was still work to be done- rifts to be closed, the last of the red lyrium Templars to round up and dispose of, and refugees to aid.  Plans were made around the war table for trips to the outer areas to start cleaning up and looking for the remaining rifts.

                   Cullen had been looking for Evelyn everywhere when he finally found her in Solas’ room.  She was sitting in the chair by his desk with her knees drawn up to her chest, hands clasped around them, staring at the murals.  “I can’t believe he’s gone,” Evelyn said dully.  “I miss him.”  Cullen leaned against the desk and listened to Evelyn talk.  She had so loved listening to his stories, just as much as she loved helping him find Elven artifacts.  She loved how his eyes would light up whenever they found one.  And now he was gone.  Her beloved friend.  Gone.

                   Leliana and her agents had been looking for him, but there was no sign.  A tear trickled down Evelyn’s cheek- joining the Inquisition had brought her first true friendships, and now one of them was gone.  She looked at Cullen and took his hand.  “I’ll be all right,” she said.  “Just give me a few more minutes here,”  Cullen smiled and kissed her cheek, leaving her to grieve her lost friend.

 


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter tonight! From this point on, I'll be diverging from the canon a bit. I've often wondered what the Inquisition was doing between the final battle and Trespasser- there really wasn't much said so I guess this is where creative license comes in. Hope you enjoy! Criticism is always appreciated.

Chapter Twenty Seven

                   Over the next few days, Evelyn had trouble keeping her food down.  Guessing she just had a bug or was just having trouble winding down from the battle with Corypheus, she had taken to having broth and light sustenance, which helped, but it was hard to hide it from Cullen.  He had noticed and was concerned, making her promise to see the healer if it didn’t clear up soon.

                   It was a warm mid-day when she decided to head to the stables and see Brutus.  She had been feeling a little light headed, but shrugged it off and carried on with her day.  She headed down the stairs and had just passed by Cullen’s makeshift desk from when they had moved to Skyhold when she began to feel light headed again. She stopped for a moment and put her hand on the wall, shaking her head a little trying to clear it. 

                   “Hey Boss, whatcha doing?” she heard from behind her.  She turned to see Bull headed her way.  Evelyn smiled and let go of the wall so she could walk with him.

                   “Headed to see Brutus, what about you?”  They walked together companionably to the stables as Bull told her he was making something for someone and he needed some supplies from the merchants to finish it.  “Ooooh Bull- who is it for?”  Evelyn teased him.  They continued on, Evelyn ribbing Bull and trying to get some details out of him before she staggered.

                   “Whoa, what’s going on Boss- you look a little funny,” he said as he caught her.  Evelyn couldn’t answer- the light-headedness had given way to black spots swimming before her eyes.  She blacked out and went limp in Bull’s arms.  “Whoa! Boss!  Hey now… come on…wake up.”  He shifted her in his arms, ignoring the gasps of alarm around him.  He started carrying her to Healer’s room, laying her down on a pallet.  Healer hurried over with a questioning look at Bull.  “I don’t know, she just passed out,” he said to her.  Healer knelt down and looked Evelyn over. 

                   “Leave now Qunari, I need to examine her,” she said as she started to pull privacy panels around.  Bull headed outside, only to find Cullen rushing towards him.  Cassandra and Blackwall were not far behind, having overheard the commotion.  Cullen tried to get past Bull but was stopped by one of Healer’s assistants who came out to head everyone off. 

                   They waited outside for a while before Healer came out and asked Cullen to come in.  He entered the room to see Evelyn laying on a cot, her legs elevated and a cool cloth on her forehead.  She had a look of fear in her eyes that concerned Cullen, and she asked the healers to leave her alone with him.  Cullen sat down at her bedside, helping Evelyn up as she struggled to a sitting position.  “Are you all right Evie?” he asked worriedly.

                   She struggled to find words for a moment, and then looking down, stammered, “I…I’m pregnant.”  She chewed on her lip as she waited for Cullen to respond, afraid of his reaction.  They had not talked at all about the possibilities of having a child when they had begun their relationship, which in retrospect, seemed foolish.  They had not talked much about their future at all, figuring that would be a conversation to have if they survived the war.  After everything, they just hadn’t found the right time, content with just being together as much as possible.

                   Cullen knelt in front of her, putting his hand gently on her stomach.  “A baby?”  he whispered, “How far along?” he asked her.  

                   “Two months,” Evelyn said.  They sat silently for a moment, digesting the news.  “Maybe we should go somewhere more private?” she asked.  Cullen agreed and helped her up.  He put his arm around her waist and supported her as she walked to the door.  They were greeted by Dorian, Bull and Cassandra and Blackwall, who had all been waiting for news.  Evelyn smiled at them and assured them all that she was all right.  She was going to go up and rest for a while and would talk to them later.

                   They sat up on her bed quietly, not sure of what to say.  Evelyn spoke first, “Are you angry?” she asked hesitantly.  He hadn’t said anything, but he had touched her stomach so gently, and there was so much wonder in his voice when he spoke.

                   “No Evie, I’m not angry.  Surprised, but not angry,” he replied.  “I hadn’t considered…” he trailed off.  “I need a moment to take this in.”  He watched her as she sat thoughtfully, her hand unconsciously rubbing her belly.  “Are you?  Angry that is?”  he asked her uncertainly.

                   “I’m afraid,” she replied.  She stood up and started pacing.  “I’m two months gone, which means that I was pregnant when I drank from the Well of Sorrows.  What will that do to the baby?  What will the anchor do?  How can I bear this?  What if I hurt the baby?  Or lose it?” Evelyn felt her vision going black again and started to fall.  Cullen jumped and caught her before she fell, hoisting her into his arms and carrying her to the bed.

                   “Evie, it will be all right,” he said soothingly.  “We can figure this out together.  But right now, we need to tend to your health.  You need to eat and rest, and then after that, we can confer with our mages to see if we can get some answers to these questions.  There is nothing more important to me than you and our baby.  I love you, and I love our child.  Never doubt that.”

                   Evelyn smiled.  Cullen held her close and kissed her, his hand on her belly.  “Our child.  I like the sound of that.” 

                   A few hours later, after Evelyn had eaten and gotten some rest, she met with her Advisors in the war room to tell them the news.  There was silence as everyone considered the ramifications of Evelyn’s pregnancy.  Josephine broke the silence first.  “If you’re happy, Inquisitor, then we are happy for you.  We can work this out.” 

                   Leliana agreed.  “However, we need to keep you out of the fighting from now on, rift closure only with extra troops to help.”  There was a knock at the door.  A messenger entered and handed a note to Leliana, who read it and smiled.

                   “Change of subject,” she said. “My contact has arrived with a special gift for you.  We need you on your throne your Worship. We’ll finish discussing this business later”

                   An hour later, Evelyn sat on her throne with Cullen at her side.  Approaching her, in chains, were the Remarches, accompanied by a handsome blonde elf.  The elf approached the throne and bowed deeply.  “My dear Inquisitor. My apologies for the delay- it is sometimes inevitable in times of war.  Plus, these three were not exactly easy to travel with.  Can you believe they tried to bribe me to kill you instead? Congratulations on saving the world, by the way.  I helped do that once too, so huzzah for you!” the elf winked at Evelyn. 

                   Leliana stepped forward.  “Your worship, may I introduce Zevran Aranai.  Assuming you know your history, his skills should speak for themselves.  I contacted him to help track down Phillipe Remarche, given their apparent ties to the Antivan Crows.”

                   Evelyn studied the assassin as he spoke. He had a way of looking at her like she wasn’t wearing any clothes, but she didn’t feel threatened- she felt amused. “And such a lovely lady, our Inquisitor yes?  After this foolishness is over, maybe I should stick around for a while, get to know you better?” 

                   Evelyn looked at Cullen, who was chuckling to himself.  Obviously, he was not threatened by Zevran, who appeared to be an incorrigible flirt.  “Focus Zevran,” Evelyn said, “As you say, let’s get this foolishness over with.  Josephine?”

                   Josephine appeared with her clipboard.   “Your Worship, I present Phillipe Remarche, and his parents, Pierre, and Theodosia for judgment this day.  They stand accused of your attempted murder.  How do the prisoners plead?”

                   All three stood silent. After a moment, Phillipe stood tall and spat “If I can’t have you, no one should.  I should have gone after him,” with a nod to Cullen.  There was murmur from the crowd, and a few hisses.  Phillipe continued, “You finally become worthy of me, and you throw it all way for that…man.”

                   Zevran slapped Phillipe upside head.  “Hush you.  The man you are talking about is four times the man you could ever hope to be.”  Phillipe stood silent but mutinous.

                   Evelyn regarded the family for a moment.  It was rare that she sentenced people to death- Erimond was the only one, but she wondered if it wasn’t worth it in this case.  If she let them live, they could come after them again.  But on the other hand, was she biased because of their history? 

                   “Monsieur and Mademoiselle Remarche, and Phillipe Remarche.  It is no secret that I hold you in complete disregard.  You humiliated me, and then tried to turn my life upside down and claim the Inquisition as your own through a forced marriage.  You then arranged to have me attacked.  Had you succeeded, what do you think the outcome would have been?  You would not be standing here on trial- you would most likely be dead, or a slave to Corypheus.  But you still stand before me arrogant, like you have done nothing wrong.  I cannot punish you for the humiliation and the attempt to force my marriage to you- that is not illegal, though it is shameful, but I can punish you for the attempt on my life. I will be contacting Empress Celene to formally strip you of all titles, properties, lands and wealth you have accumulated.  You will go to the Exalted Plains and aid the Inquisition in whatever way my agents in that area see fit.   There is a caravan leaving tomorrow that will drop you off.  Please escort them to the cells to wait until it is time to leave.”  All three Remarches turned pale as she spoke, but said nothing as they were lead away. 

                   Zevran turned his attention to Evelyn again, bowing deeply and winking at her as he walked away.  “If you have the time, do meet me at your lovely tavern, Inquisitor.” 

                   As everyone in the room disbanded, Cullen took Evelyn’s hand.  “Well done, love,” he said to her as he kissed her on the forehead.  “Do you want to go to the Rest for a while, or would you like to wait until after dinner?”

                   As he spoke, the kitchen staff was bringing food in, but the smell of it made Evelyn want to heave.  Weakly, she smiled at Cullen, “Maybe later.  I think I need to go throw up now.”

                   Later that evening, after a light dinner, Cullen and Evelyn went over to the Rest to find Zevran holding court with Leliana by his side.  Evelyn knew they had fought together with the Warden, and it was nice to see Leliana relax with her friend.  After several hilarious, and scandalous stories, and even a quick dance with Zevran, who kissed her hand gallantly afterward, Cullen and Evelyn went back up to her quarters.

                   They lay in bed with Cullen’s head resting on her belly as he spoke to his unborn child.  Evelyn lay quietly, fingers in Cullen’s hair as she thought.  “Cullen, I want to tell Dorian tomorrow.  And Fiona and Vivienne.  I’m worried and I need their help.”  It frightened Evelyn that the two people who could possibly help her with this couldn’t be found.  She still mourned the loss of Solas and kept hoping he would come back.  Every day since she had returned to Skyhold, she went and sat at his desk, just to feel close to him.  Morrigan had disappeared as well.  Evelyn was not as concerned over that on a personal level, but she could not deny that Morrigan could have been a valuable resource about the baby. 

                   Cullen couldn’t deny that he was worried too, but he wanted to be strong for Evie. He sat back on the bed and gathered her in his arms.  “We can do that.  We can tell whoever you want tomorrow.”  As Evelyn drifted off to sleep, Cullen lay awake, watching her sleep.  He ran his hand over her belly again- she hadn’t started to show at all yet, and he couldn’t wait to see her grow ripe with their child.  He never thought this would happen to him- a love of his own, a child, he felt so fortunate.  He never thought he would be so deserving of a life like this.  He wanted to give her everything.

 


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So like I said, I've gone off canon a little on this

Chapter Twenty-Eight

                   The next morning found Evelyn sitting on her balcony- a morning of violent retching had left her weak and in need of some fresh air.  Cullen had gone to get her something to settle her stomach and get Healer when Dorian came bounding up the stairs.  “Cousin!  Taking the morning off?”  He sat down in the chair opposite Evelyn and looked at her.  “You look terrible,” he said. 

                   Evelyn laughed.  “Thanks, Dorian, that’s a confidence booster.  I’m glad you’re here.”  She looked closer at Dorian.  “Something’s different about you.  Is that a new pendant? Looks like a dragon’s tooth.”  Dorian blushed and cleared his throat. “Talk to me Dorian.”  Evelyn looked at Dorian expectantly. 

                   Dorian stayed silent for a few moments as Evelyn stared him down and then snorted. “Oh. Very well- you’re going to find out eventually anyway.  The pendant is a gift from someone.  From…Iron Bull.”  Evelyn stared at Dorian in disbelief.  “We’ve been together for a little while now.  Bull’s not exactly good at discretion about conquests, I’m surprised you haven’t heard about it already.”

                   Evelyn was quiet for a moment.  “Does he make you happy?  Do I need to have a talk with him as your cousin?  I need details man, details!”  She found herself feeling protective of Dorian- she still remembered the confrontation with his father all those months ago.

                   Dorian put his hand over hers.  “He makes me happy Cousin, don’t worry.  It started out after a night of drinking but continued from there.  Things changed after Corypheus, though, Bull got more serious after that.  He just gave me the pendant the other day.”

                   Evelyn squeezed his hand.  “Then I’m happy for you Dorian.  I want you to be happy.”  They sat quietly together for a few minutes before Evelyn paled and ran for the chamber pot, retching again before curling up weakly on the floor.  Dorian was by her side in a moment as was Cullen, who had just come up with a breakfast tray.  They helped her to bed, Cullen giving her a cup of ginger tea.

                   “Healer will be up shortly,” Cullen said as he smoothed Evelyn’s hair.  “How are you feeling?”

                   “Pretty crappy at the moment,” Evelyn replied.  She glanced at Dorian who was waiting for an explanation.  “Um...Dorian.  I was going to find you this morning right away, but I got sidetracked.  I…We have something to tell you.” She hesitated as Dorian stared at her.  “I’m…going to have a baby,” Evelyn continued. 

                   Dorian looked shocked for a moment and then broke into a big grin.  “Cousin, this is wonderful news!” he said as he pulled her into a hug. Evelyn returned his hug tightly but didn’t say anything.  Dorian pulled away.  “This is wonderful news right?” he asked. 

                   Cullen and Evelyn looked at each other.  “We’re happy about it, but there are concerns,” Cullen admitted.  “The Anchor, the Well, and the stress- we’re worried about the baby. Plus, there are still rifts to close- it needs to be done, but…”

                   Evelyn interjected, “Plus, I wasn’t taking very good care of myself during the first two months, and all that rift magic…” she trailed off, looking pale.  She started to vomit again, making it to the pot just in the nick of time.  She sat up, wiping her mouth before crawling weakly back to the bed.  “Plus I can’t seem to stop vomiting,” she said. 

                   “Well dearie, that’s where I come in,” said Healer, walking briskly into the room towards the bed.  “If you two gentlemen will excuse us for a moment, I would like to check her over.”  She set up a few items on the bedside and looked at the two men, who hadn’t moved yet.  “Shoo!” she said waving their hands at them.  “I’ll come get you again when we’re done.”

                   They went downstairs to wait.  Dorian was thoughtful on the way down, mulling over their concerns. Cullen looked hesitant before saying anything.  “I want to marry her,” he said simply.  “Not just because of the baby, I’ve been planning on asking since she finished Corypheus.”  

                   Amused, Dorian’s eyes twinkled as he asked, “Are you asking permission, Commander?  You wouldn’t need it- I couldn’t think of anyone better for her than you.” 

                   Cullen chuckled, “Well, permission is nice- I should talk to Warrick though.  I just want to ask her the right way.  I was hoping you’d help.”  He outlined a plan, everything dependent on when Evelyn could travel again.  Dorian readily agreed to help, just as the healer headed down the stairs, urging the two men back upstairs.

                   They arrived back upstairs to find Evelyn looking a little better.  She smiled at the two men, “Well, we can scratch one worry off the list.  Healer said that everything looks all right health-wise- the first few months are a bit on the forgiving side.  So that just leaves all the magical worries, and the need for me to carry a bucket everywhere I go,” she joked.  Sobering up a little, she looked to Dorian, “What do you think Dorian?  About the anchor and the well- do you think…I mean…could there be…problems?” she trailed off.

                   Dorian looked at her.  “I don’t know,” he admitted, “the best people to ask are gone- perhaps Vivienne and Fiona?”  Evelyn nodded in agreement.  Dorian smiled. “I’m going to be an uncle!” he said happily, “Congratulations to you both!  Don’t worry- we will sort this all out, I’ll get Fiona and start looking into this immediately,” he hugged Evelyn close.  “Don’t worry,” he said encouragingly.

                   Evelyn smiled.  She got up from the bed and smoothed her clothes.  “Congratulations to you too Dorian,” looking meaningfully at his pendant.  Dorian smiled, blew a kiss and headed to the library.  Cullen took his leave as well, having some duties to attend to, leaving Evelyn to think for a while, and to sit for a few more minutes deciding if she was done throwing up for the day yet. 

 


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

Chapter Twenty-Nine

                   A week later, a group had gathered to see Cassandra off as she left to begin her duties as Divine Victoria.  The evening before, Cassandra and Evelyn had walked the battlements together one last time, talking about the future, reminiscing and laughing together.  They had become such good friends since they met when Evelyn was still a prisoner all those months ago, and Evelyn was going to miss her very much. 

                   Evelyn didn’t have much time to grieve losing her friend as she left the next day herself.  So far, the Inquisition had been handling the fallout from the war, sending out Evelyn’s companions as needed to deal with the last of the red Templars.  Luckily, Solas had helped them map where rifts could possibly open up, uncovering a large one in the Hinterlands that needed to be taken care of immediately because of how close it was to the farms.  Given Evelyn’s pregnancy, all remaining companions went, as well as Warrick and some extra troops selected by Cullen. 

                   The attitude was light-hearted on the journey- even though Cassandra and Solas were missed.  The rift in the Hinterlands had been a big one, but as a group, they dealt with it handily.  There was a celebratory atmosphere around the fire that night- there had been no reports of rifts for a while and using Solas’ calculations, they would be able to watch for them.

                   Evelyn knew that there was a possibility that soon her friends would be going their separate ways.  Varric had already talked about heading back to Kirkwall and Vivienne wanted to go back to Orlais soon.  She felt an air of melancholy in spite of the banter and stories that were flowing tonight- thoughts of losing her friends worries about the baby weighed heavily on her mind.  Dorian, Vivienne, and Fiona were not able to find anything on how the Anchor and the Well could affect the baby.  Even while she enjoyed her friends antics and stories, she felt detached from everyone while she dwelled on her troubles. 

                    A little tired, she called it a night, much to the protest of her friends.  While the pregnancy fatigue was unwelcome, she decided she would much rather have that then the violent morning (more like all the time) sickness that she had suffered through.  She still had some bouts of sickness, but they were much more manageable thanks to Healer. 

                   The next morning, Evelyn awoke to a messenger bird, directing them to go head southwest to check out reports of bandit activity.  She noticed that Dorian and Warrick were missing, but had been told that they had ridden ahead to scout ahead and see what the trouble was.  They traveled most of the day and stopped to camp- when Evelyn noticed where they were.  They were not far from Honnleath, where Cullen had brought her and gave her his coin, the one she still carried in her pocket.  They met up with Dorian and Warrick, who reported that they had found nothing of consequence. 

                   As they started preparing dinner, Dorian tapped Evelyn on the shoulder and led her away from the group.   “There’s something you need to see- down by the lake.”  Evelyn gave him a questioning look.  “Trust me, Cousin,” Dorian said as he pushed her along.   She walked along to the lake, coming to the pier where Cullen had taken her months ago, and stopped short.

                   Candles lined the pier, leading to where Cullen stood- he had his back to her as he looked over the lake.  Her heart skipped a beat as he turned around smiling and held his hand out to her, beckoning her to join him.  He took her into his arms as she joined him and kissed her deeply.  “I missed you,” he murmured in her ear as they held each other. 

                   “I missed you too.  We were getting ready to head back to Skyhold when we got a raven saying to come here. Was that you?”  she asked him.

                   “I wanted to surprise you,” he said.  “I wanted to get you out here again, but things have been a little unusual the last few weeks.  I figured since you were out this way, I would take advantage of that.”  They hadn’t let go of each other yet.

                   “It’s a nice surprise, Cullen,” Evelyn said.  “I couldn’t ask for a better one.” 

                   Cullen pulled away from her for a moment.  “You could ask for a better surprise, Evie.  I should have done this ages ago.  We have a baby on the way, and we haven’t talked at all about our future, and that needs to change.”  Cullen got down on one knee. “Evie, I love you more than my own life.  Will you marry me?”

                   Evelyn stood silent for a moment, caressing Cullen’s cheek. She got down on her knees and took his hands in hers.   “You don’t have to get down on one knee for this- you are my equal.  You have been my friend, my love, my reason for fighting, and my reason for winning.  Will _you_ marry _me_?”   

                   Cullen exhaled- he hadn’t even been aware that he was holding his breath.  He took Evelyn’s face in his hands and gently brought his lips to hers, the world disappearing around them as their lips met in a passionate kiss.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So a bit more canon divergence. I originally planned on following canon through Trespasser, but I was inspired to add in the pregnancy by several other excellent fics that I've read. When I added that in, I thought about leaving the proposal the way it was in the game but changed my mind. I figure Cullen would "want to do the right thing" as it were instead of waiting two years. I'm not saying that they needed to get married in some salute to archaic tradition- I just wanted them to.


	30. Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty

                   Wedding preparations were underway- a date had been decided on upon their return from the Hinterlands and invitations had been sent out.  Evelyn had stood her ground to Josephine and insisted that this be a family event only- she did not want this to be about politics.  Cullen’s family would be coming in, and after a days deliberation, Evelyn sent invitations to her family as well.  Cassandra was not able to make it, and Blackwall had left as well- going to the Wardens as he had been ordered.  He had left behind a beautifully carved baby bed and rocking horse as a baby gift and promised to return to visit as soon as he could. 

                   Evelyn had cried when he left, but she knew that joining the Wardens was what he wanted, and needed to atone for his past.  He had always been a protective and loyal friend, and she had come to view him as a father figure in her life.  Even Sera seemed downcast by his leaving- they had always shared a special, if somewhat bizarre bond, so Evelyn made sure to spend some extra cookie baking time with her to keep her cheerful.  Josephine also seemed a little down about Blackwall, expressing on occasion how she missed the flowers that had appeared on her desk every morning.

                   A week before the wedding, Cullen’s family arrived.  His sisters Mia and Rosalie and their husbands, and Branson and his son arrived, excited to look around and meet their new sister.  Evelyn had been going over some reports when they arrived, and nervously came downstairs to meet them.  All four Rutherfords had the same blonde hair, and Branson’s son Michael had the same color hair as well.  Michael was adorable and had taken to Cullen right away- toddling after him wherever he went.  Mia and Rosalie immediately grabbed Evelyn and took her away for some girl time- grabbing Josephine as well for a look at the wedding dress, which was currently residing in Josephine’s room.

                   The ladies all sat around in Josephine’s room chatting and exclaiming over wedding plans.  It was going to be a very simple wedding, but they loved the details anyway.  As they sat, Mia spoke up.  “Evelyn, what do you plan to do after the wedding?  Have you made any plans about where you will live?”

                   Evelyn nodded.  “We’ve talked about it.  Right now, we need to stay here until the Inquisition work is finished.  We’re not sure how long that will take.  After that, Cullen wants to start a sanctuary for Templars to help wean them off lyrium.  I know he would like to move closer to you in South Reach to do this, which is fine with me.  And maybe a few more babies too.”

                   Mia grew quiet. “Has he had a lot of problems with lyrium then?  I know he quit taking it, but he hasn’t talked about it much in his letters.  We’ve spent years worrying about him, wondering if he was even alive.  I’ve seen former Templars come through from time to time and it scared me.  It killed me to think of Cullen that way.”

                   Evelyn nodded.  “It’s gotten a lot better.  When we first met, he had a lot of headaches, and if they weren’t treated right away, the pain would spread and he would go delirious.  He’d lash out on occasion too.  He’s improved so much, though.  Dorian, Fiona, and Dagna, our arcane specialist helped him a lot, and we found a former Knight Commander that had been researching withdrawal cures as well.  Cullen stays in contact with him.  He’s coming for the wedding, and so he can meet with my people here and compare notes.  Believe me, it could have been worse.  If Cullen hadn’t been recruited to the Inquisition, he could have ended up exposed to Red Lyrium.  We tried to reverse the effects of that, but haven’t been able to.”  Evelyn shuddered, not wanting to think of losing Cullen to red lyrium, or to any type of addiction.  She too had seen Templars succumb to their addiction.  It wasn’t pretty.

                   Everyone sat quietly for a moment before Josephine clapped her hands.  “Ladies, we need to plan.  A wedding shower!  We only have a few days.  I thought we could have it the day before the wedding.”  That led to a renewed lively discussion about the wedding and planning the shower before Evelyn had to leave to take care of her duties and then lay down for a while.  Her family was set to arrive the next day, and Evelyn was nervous to the point of being sick about it.

                   Cullen came up to find her for dinner and found her laying on the bed, hand on her belly, stroking it absent-mindedly.  He sat on the bed next to her and put his hand over hers.  He loved to feel his child in her.  “Are you feeling all right?” he asked her.  He knew that she was nervous.  Evelyn had originally just wanted to get married in the garden right away and not have a wedding, but Cullen knew that he would never hear the end of it from his sisters, so she had gone along with the planning.  Her family had been invited out of politeness, and she had not expected they would come.  “Are you worried about your family?”

                   “No,” she said.  “I was just thinking about something Mia and I talked about before.  Something that I had taken for granted,” she sat up and looked at Cullen.  “We talked about lyrium and your plans for starting a sanctuary.  It made me think of what could have happened to you if you hadn’t joined the Inquisition, or if you had kept taking lyrium, or if you had remained a templar- you could have become one of those behemoths…” she teared up just thinking about it.  “I can’t stop thinking about it and then I start panicking and obsessing.  I guess I’m just going through pregnant lady emotions, and I’m being ridiculous.  You’re right here and you’re fine.”

                   “Thanks to you and Dorian, I am”, Cullen said.  He was going to have headaches and episodes for a long time, but with help, he was able to handle them better and able to recover more quickly.  He stood up and held out his hand to her.  “Dinner?”  Evelyn nodded and stood up.  Cullen held her close to him for a moment.  “Don’t worry,” he murmured in her ear. “I’ve never been better.”  He kissed her, his hand on her back, rounding down to settle on her bottom.  He kissed her again, deeper, pulling her as close as he could with her belly getting in the way.  “Want to skip it?” he whispered in her ear as he kissed down her neck.  “I’ve missed you.”

                   Evelyn moaned.  “We really should head down.  Your family likes me and I’d like to keep it that way,” she said breathlessly as Cullen reached for her breast.  “Plus, I’m starving.  But…I might need to retire early to rest if you know what I mean…”

                   Cullen laughed.  “And I may just have to come and check on you.  I worry, you know,” he said.  “All right, let’s go to dinner.”  Evelyn took his hand, but stopped suddenly, a hand on her belly.  She looked quizzical as she felt around, then smiled.  Taking Cullen’s hand, she put it on her belly, just in time for him to feel a kick. He grinned.  “Is this the first?” Evelyn smiled.  They both stood with their hands on her belly, waiting for another kick.  They were rewarded with another one rather quickly, which made them both laugh.  Evelyn was still worried about what all the magic she had encountered would do, not to mention lyrium exposure through Cullen, and so far, they had not been able to find any answers.  None of the mages knew, and Dagna didn’t either.  Evelyn had even asked Cole, but he couldn’t say either.  He hoped that maybe as the baby grew, he would be able to tell.

                   Evelyn, between the baby kicking, and the promise of alone time with Cullen later, felt much better as they went down to dinner.

 


	31. Chapter Thirty-One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I had a lot of fun writing the whole wedding stuff- maybe because I have new characters to incorporate- not sure, but I wrote most of the wedding stuff in one weekend. Hope you enjoy!

Chapter Thirty-One

                   The next morning, Evelyn waited outside with Cullen, Josephine and Warrick as the caravan containing her family arrived.  Evelyn had been shocked with her parents accepted their invitation, along with Osborne and Clarissa and their families.  Evelyn had never met any of her nieces and nephews and had not seen Clarissa in years.  Chana had fussed over Evelyn all morning, and Cullen thought she never looked lovelier.  Evelyn had a glow about her now, and he couldn’t keep his eyes (or hands) off of her.  Over the months, her anchor had not given her any trouble, but her eyes were still a blue/green mix.  It didn’t seem to hurt her, and the sharpness that had begun to develop had gone away.  Cullen hoped it would stay that way with her family coming. 

                   Bann Trevelyan had finally seen reason and signed to documents canceling the marriage arrangement, but they had had no contact with Evelyn since they left all those months ago.  Cullen didn’t even know if they had heard about the assassination attempt that had almost killed their youngest daughter.  It was at the Mother Giselle’s and Josephine’s insistence that they were invited.  Evelyn had planned on inviting Osborne and his family, but Giselle thought that it would be better to invite them all- it may mend fences.  Evelyn doubted that.

                   The carriage came to a halt and Bann Trevelyan stepped out, extending a hand to his wife.  Osborne and Clarissa followed their families in the second carriage.  Osborne and his wife Cecelia had two children, a nine-year-old boy named Edward and a six-year-old boy named Charles.  They all stepped out of the carriage, the boys looking very excited, Cecelia looking a little nervous.  Clarissa and her husband, Nicholas Walsworth had two girls and a boy, Sophia, age eight, Piper, age six and Whitford, age three.  Clarissa was still achingly beautiful, as were her daughters. 

                   They all came into the main hall, where Evelyn finally got to meet the rest of her extended family.  Cecelia seemed sweet and smiled when Osborne hugged his little sister and his brother, delighted to see them again.  Clarissa, on the other hand, looked haughty- as if the hall was beneath her.  Her eyes narrowed as she looked Evelyn over, and she looked positively spiteful when she noticed Cullen standing next to her with his arm around her waist.  Evelyn studied Nicholas Walworth as she shook his hand. He was handsome, but he was getting soft thanks to his soft life.  Clarissa couldn’t help but compare him to Cullen and found her own husband to be severely lacking.  Nicholas seemed cordial enough, and Whitford was delightful- a chubby little boy with dark hair and an infectious laugh.  Sophia and Piper were reserved, looking to their mother and grandmother for cues as how to behave. 

                   Evelyn had Josephine show them to their rooms so they could rest after their long journey, outlining lunch and dinner plans for the day before they left.  They had planned to introduce Cullen’s family to hers at a private lunch to be held at the Herald’s rest, along with the remaining companions.  Evelyn couldn’t bear to leave them out, and was looking forward to making the introductions.  Until then, Cullen was going to see to troop training, and Evelyn wanted to go see her Brutus.  Kissing quickly, they parted ways. 

                   On her way to the stables, Branson caught up and walked with her to the stables.  “I haven’t had much of a chance to get to know you, and I want to see this horse of yours.”  They chatted companionably as they walked, stopping only when Branson stopped short at seeing Brutus. Evelyn smiled and held her hand out to Brutus, who trotted over for a nuzzle.  “My goodness, he’s a sight isn’t he?”  Branson exclaimed.  He tentatively reached out to touch Brutus, who snorted but didn’t move.  “He’s…a little cold,” Branson said.

                   Evelyn nodded.  “I suppose it’s because he’s dead, kind of.”  She explained Brutus to Branson, who looked at him with renewed interest.  Evelyn led Brutus back to the stalls and spent some time grooming him, while chatting with Branson about his life.  His wife had died in childbirth, and it was clear he missed her. 

                   “Janna was such a sweet girl,” he said.  “She wanted to be a mother so badly and was so excited.  I never thought I would lose her.”  He sighed as he patted Brutus.  “I’ve been raising Michael with Mia and Rosalie’s help- I don’t know if I would have made it without them.”  Evelyn studied Branson as he patted Brutus.  He was very handsome-and kept in shape with heavy farm work, and had a jovial personality when he wasn’t thinking about his wife.  “I wish Cullen and our parents could have gotten to meet her and Michael.  Mother would have been beside herself.  She would have been to meet you too.  The oldest son you know…” he trailed off. 

                   Evelyn nodded.  “I wish I could have met them too.  It’s been nice that Cullen’s family has been so accepting of me.  I’ve always wanted to have a loving family, especially now that we’re going to have a baby of our own.  Hopefully soon, there will be plenty of cousins to play with.” 

                   Branson stopped to look at Evelyn.  “What about your family?  They’re here now- aren’t you close with them?”  He hadn’t met Evelyn’s family yet, he had been tending to Michael with they arrived before Mia took him to go to the garden.  He had looked forward to meeting Cullen’s future wife.  He had idolized his older brother since the day he knew how to and had initially been hurt when Cullen talked him out of becoming a Templar.  He understood now and was delighted to be here for the wedding.  Cullen had told him yesterday of his hopes to move closer to them when they could, and his plans for the sanctuary. 

                   Evelyn smirked.  “We’re…not close,” she said shortly.  My brother Warrick is a former Templar- he’s around here somewhere- he’s the only one I’m close to.  My sister Charlotte died at the conclave,” her breath hitched when she said that. “The others, well- they’re invited because Josephine made me.  It’s a long story and not a pretty one.  My real family is here at Skyhold- or, most of them are anyway.  Cassandra is the new Divine, Blackwall left to join the Wardens and Solas…disappeared.”

                   Branson had met a few of the members of Skyhold already when Cullen and he went to the Rest the day before.  He was silent for a moment.  “I’m sorry.  I didn’t know,” he said quietly. 

                   Evelyn smiled.  “I’m sorry for you as well.  I’m sorry about Janna.  She sounds like she was a wonderful girl.”  She patted Brutus on the rump and handed the brush over to the new Horsemaster, Barrett, who had taken over when Dennet had returned home.  “Shall we go catch up with Cullen?  He’s working with some of our younger recruits this morning.” 

                   Branson offered her his arm as they walked to the training yard, walking together as brother and sister already.  The easy acceptance warmed Evelyn’s heart.  As they approached, they noticed Mia standing with Michael watching the training, Michael waving around a little wooden knife and laughing loudly.  Cullen was shirtless and sparring with Warrick in a good-natured match.  Evelyn grinned, proud of both of them.  She noticed Clarissa watching from a window above, her eyes not leaving Cullen as he spun and dipped, focused on Warrick.  Evelyn shook her head and returned to watching the match, finding a spot to sit on the sidelines.  She was only about five months along, but her back hurt and she was feeling heavy.  Cullen and Warrick continued to dodge and charge against each other, blade meeting blade and shields blocking often.  Finally, Cullen managed to get Warrick on the ground, blade to neck, forcing Warrick to yield.  A round of applause went up for the two warriors, and they grinned easily as Warrick took Cullen’s proffered hand, getting up on his feet.  They put their equipment away, Warrick grinning delightedly as he saw Chana watching from further back. 

                   Evelyn looked up as a shadow loomed over her.  Cullen held his hand out to her, smiling- he was barely breathing heavy even after that workout.  Evelyn took his hand and he hauled her up, putting his arm around her, the other on her stomach.  “How is our little one today?” he asked her quietly.     

                   “Fine,” she said as she shrugged him away. “Ewww…you’re all sweaty” she laughed.  She couldn’t take her eyes off of him.  “Go take a bath,” she said with a wink that promised more later.  He kissed her and headed off to take a bath.  She glanced up at the window again and saw Clarissa still standing there, watching Cullen leave.  Now she was starting to get weirded out.  It almost looked like Clarissa was jealous, which Evelyn could not understand.  She shrugged it off for now and turned to start out for her room, not wanting to keep Cullen waiting too long.  Warrick caught up with her as she turned to walk.  “Hey Little Bit- can I talk to you for a minute?”

                   Evelyn looked at Warrick and wrinkled her nose.  “Maker’s breath, I just sent Cullen to take a bath, do I have to tell you the same?”  Evelyn found that she was extremely sensitive to smells lately, much to her annoyance living where she did. 

                   Warrick grinned.  “Fine.  I’ll go take a bath first, but I want to talk to you before lunch.”  He wiped his sweaty arm across Evelyn’s face, laughing as she recoiled and started wiping frantically, cussing at him.  “I’d say I’m telling Mother on you, but somehow, I doubt that would work,” she sputtered as he ran off.  Shaking her head, she headed inside.

                   Cullen was already in the bath when she got there, so she grabbed a towel and wiped her face, fixing herself up while she waited for him to finish.  He came out wrapped in a towel and opened a drawer to pull out some clean clothes.  Evelyn turned around from her mirror, watching him.  A stronger sense of smell wasn’t the only thing that had developed with her pregnancy- she had also developed an inability to keep her hands off of her husband to be.  She much preferred that to morning sickness, but it was a little difficult to handle when she was all dressed up.  She walked over to Cullen, who had removed his towel and was standing naked, drying himself off and snaked her arms around him from behind.  “Have I mentioned lately how sexy you are when you spar?”  she said to him. 

                   Grinning, he said, “Come to think of it, I don’t think you’ve ever mentioned that.  Maybe I should spar more often.”  He had noticed Evelyn’s increased appetite lately and found that his had grown as well.  Something about the sight of her growing with his child made him want her more every day.

                   Evelyn stood on her toes to whisper in Cullen’s ear.  “Have I further mentioned that I may not be wearing any smalls today?”  She turned Cullen around and pushed him onto the bed, pushing him back to lay down.  She climbed on top of him, pulling her skirts so that she was straddling him.  Evelyn tried to lean down to kiss him but humphed in frustration when her stomach got in the way.  Cullen laughed and sat up, kissing her deeply, thrusting in tongue into her mouth.  He remembered the last time she had not worn smalls and how turned on he got by that situation- this time wasn’t much different. 

                   They couldn’t take the time to undress Evelyn since lunch was soon and she still had to see Warrick- but they made good use of the time they had.  Evelyn straddled Cullen, grinding herself against his hardness, moaning at how good that felt.  Watching him in action today had excited her so much that she knew she wasn’t going to last long, and she was already so wet for him she could barely stand it.  Raising up, she guided herself onto Cullen’s cock, lowering herself down slowly.  Cullen brought his hands to her breasts, rubbing over her clothed nipples as she started to ride him slowly.  Thanking the maker that she was wearing a lower cut loose dress today, Cullen ran his tongue down her throat and over her exposed chest before he pulled the front of her dress down, exposing her full breasts right at mouth level.  He caught a nipple with his mouth while his fingers found the other one, moving them in time with Evelyn’s thrusts.  They just couldn’t get enough of each other- Evelyn speeding up as she started to feel the pressure building to a climax as Cullen kept his mouth on her breasts.  The position they were in put extra pressure on Evelyn’s sensitive clit and it wasn’t long before she came, crying out and clutching Cullen’s shoulders, thrusting and grinding hard against him, trying to make it last.  Her walls tightened around his cock as she came, bringing him along with her.  He groaned as he spilled inside of her, calling her name and burying his head between her breasts as they rode it out. 

                   They collapsed against each other for a moment before Evelyn got up and grabbed the towel so she could clean herself up.  As Cullen dressed, and she straightened herself out, they talked about the rest of their day and of getting their families together.  They heard a knock at the downstairs door and Warrick came up the stairs, ready for his talk with Evelyn.  “Did I interrupt something?” he said grinning at the level look he got from Evelyn.  Cullen excused himself and went downstairs to catch up with his family.

                   “So what do you need Warrick?” Evelyn asked.  “It must be important if you wanted to talk to me about it first.”  Evelyn and Warrick were as close as brother and sister could be, having spent years apart, and then finding each other again.  It surprised her when Warrick grew quiet and fidgety- he didn’t get nervous often, so Evelyn turned around and gave him her full attention.

                   “Do you like Chana?” he asked her tentatively.  Evelyn studied him curiously.  Even though they had only reconnected in the last year, she knew her brother enough to know that he needed her to be serious and answer truthfully.

                   “Of course, I do.  She’s a lovely young woman, why?”  Evelyn had an idea of what the answer to that question was already, but she let Warrick take his time answering. 

                   “I…want to marry her.  I love her,” he answered simply.  He waited as Evelyn digested this news, not that he had to wait long.

                   “Well ok,” she said.  “You don’t need my permission Brother.  Are you going to tell our parents?  Is that why you are talking to me first?”

                   “I don’t know.  I guess I just wanted to see how you feel about it, her being an elf and all.”  Warrick knew deep down that Evelyn was fine with it- she would have objected long before this if she was not.  He just wasn’t certain how the rest of the family would take it.  They were already disappointed that he had left the Templars, and now, marrying an elf?  He knew they wouldn’t like it, and would probably blame Evelyn for it as well.  “Or maybe I’m wondering about the timing of telling them?  I was thinking of yelling it as they drive away after the wedding…you think?”

                   Laughing, Evelyn shook her head. “That would probably be easiest, but it’s also not the best idea.  Let me ask you this- are you worried they’ll disown you?  You know I wouldn’t.  But, I do feel the need to warn you, human/elf marriages are not exactly popular, so you would have to be prepared for that.”

                   Warrick nodded, “I know,” he said with a sigh.  “As for Mother and Father, no I don’t care if they disown me.  I was never in line for an inheritance anyway, and I’m pretty much used to finding my own way.  I knew I could count on you too Little Bit.  I know that you don’t plan on remaining at Skyhold any longer than you need to, so I was hoping that we could maybe follow you.  I could help Cullen with the Templar Sanctuary, and Chana is willing.”  Warrick eyed her hopefully. “Would you mind if we came along?”

                   Evelyn jumped up delightedly and hugged her brother.  “I would love it!” she squealed. “To have my brother and his wife, and their children near me?  Nothing would make me happier!”  She sobered up for a moment.  “When do you want to get married?” she asked him. 

                   “Maybe in the next few weeks. Chana doesn’t have any family to speak of, but she wants to wait so it doesn’t want to take attention away from you.  She practically worships you, you know.  She’s always talking about how kind and generous you are.”  Evelyn had always tried to make sure she let Chana know how much she appreciated her- making sure she was taken care of and comfortable and sometimes bringing her little trinkets from her travels if she thought Chana would like them.  Talking to each other while Chana tended to her needs had made them close- Evelyn never made Chana feel like a servant.

                   “Do you want to get married with us?” Evelyn asked quietly.  “I wouldn’t mind at all.  I get enough attention as it is.” 

                   Warrick thought about it for a moment.  “I don’t know.  If Mother and Father don’t react well, it could make for a very awkward wedding for everyone.  I don’t want to do that to you.  I suppose I’ll have to talk to them and see what they say.  I’ll let you know.”  Looking at the clock, Warrick stood up and held his arm to Evelyn. “Escort your handsome brother to lunch Little Bit?”

                   Evelyn chewed on her lip for a moment and asked Warrick to sit down again.  “How well do you know Clarissa?”  she asked him hesitantly.  Seeing her sister watch Cullen so intently had unnerved her for some reason, and it was bothering her still.   She never spent any time with Clarissa as a child, and had only been around ten years old when Clarissa and Nicholas got married.  She remembered meeting Nicholas briefly but didn’t remember much beyond that.  Being eight years older than Evelyn, Clarissa didn’t spend much time with her, and always seemed disdainful and condescending when she did.  Evelyn could tell that Clarissa had picked up on Mother’s attitude and treated Evelyn the same way Mother did when she wasn’t ignoring her.  After she married, Clarissa would come home to visit her parents, but Evelyn never saw her, being buried away with her own tutors.  After Evelyn turned sixteen, she hadn’t seen Clarissa again until today.

                   Warrick shot a confused look at Evelyn.  “Not very well, why?”

                   Evelyn fidgeted with her dress, feeling a little awkward.  “I don’t like the way she was looking at Cullen,” she muttered.  She had shrugged it off earlier, but it was starting to bother her.  “I don’t know if I’m just being paranoid, or hormonal, or if my intuition is right.” 

                   “Well, Little Bit, there’s an easy enough solution- talk to Bull.  He’ll help you figure it out. You’re not worried about Cullen, are you?  I know he only has eyes for you.”.

                   Evelyn nodded. “Maybe I’m just being pregnant.  I don’t know.  I’ll talk to Bull when I get a chance,” she shook her head and stood up, smoothing her dress.  “OK, NOW let’s go to lunch.  I hope they have some of those pickled radish things.  Ooh, and some peanut butter.”


	32. Chapter Thirty-Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More wedding stuff. I suck at summaries.

Chapter Thirty-Two

                   The next few days went by quickly, leaving three days to the wedding.  Evelyn’s parents did not take Warrick’s marriage news well, just as they suspected.  Warrick and Chana opted to have a quiet wedding right after Evelyn’s- Osborne could be there and everyone else would be busy with the wedding.  Evelyn knew she would slip away to watch, nothing could stop her.  Cullen said he would cover for her so she could go too.

                   Evelyn awoke that morning and found a remarkably free schedule for the day.  She curled up against Cullen, cuddling against him until he woke up and made love to her again.  Tearing themselves away from each other, they got ready for the day and went to get some breakfast.  Evelyn so far had enjoyed every minute of spending time with Cullen’s family, and with Osborne and his family.  His boys were boisterous and funny and Cecelia was sweet and loving and a joy to be around.  Evelyn continued to be wary of Clarissa, who still watched Cullen when she thought she wasn’t being observed- she didn’t know what to make of it, but she became more sensitive to it every day. 

                   Evelyn walked outside the Main Hall and looked around, trying to decide what to do with her day.  She saw Varric and Bull with their heads together and was immediately suspicious, but decided to leave them alone- she would find out what they were up to soon enough.  Feeling a little achy, she headed back inside and went into Solas’ old room, taking a seat at his desk and looking at the murals.  She still missed her friend dearly, wishing she could see him again.  Sitting here in his room brought back her fears about the baby.  She caressed her stomach, wishing she could know if the anchor and the Well had hurt the baby, a fear that nagged incessantly in the back of her mind.  She spent a few minutes looking at the books on his desk- she had not allowed anyone to touch anything, hoping maybe she would find something she overlooked before but found nothing.  She sat at the desk with her head in her hands, when she heard someone walk into the room.

                   “I thought I’d find you here,” she heard Cullen say as he came in.  “Are you all right?”  Evelyn didn’t say anything right away.  She ran her hand over her stomach again, feeling the baby kick.  Cullen came to stand by her, “Worrying about the baby?”

                   “Always,” Evelyn said. “It’s always in the back of my mind.”  Cullen came up behind her to rub her shoulders as she absentmindedly played with a book that was on the desk.  “I just don’t know what to do.  Somedays, I’m content to wait and see, and other days, I think I’ll die if I don’t know right away.” 

                   “I can hear the baby now.” Cullen and Evelyn both jumped as Cole appeared on the scaffolding that was still set up in the room.  “I couldn’t before because it was too little, but the baby is bigger now.”  Evelyn sat very still as Cullen approached the scaffold.

                   “Cole, is there anything you can tell us?”  Cullen asked as he tried to keep the pleading out of his voice.  Evelyn held her breath as Cole appeared sitting cross-legged on the desk before her. 

                   “Stand up,” Cole said to Evelyn.  When she did, he put his hands on her belly and looked at her intently.  Evelyn stood quietly, waiting for Cole to speak, Cullen coming up behind her, hands on her waist.  They both waited anxiously as he listened. 

                   Cole looked at Evelyn.  “Safe, warm, happy.  She loves it when you talk to her.  Her arms are whole, and she doesn’t hear the voices.  She belongs to herself.”  Evelyn released the breath she was holding as she heard someone running down the stairs.

                   Dorian burst into the room.  “Did I just hear him correctly?” He turned to Evelyn who had sat down at Solas’ desk, weak with relief as Cullen gently rubbed her back.  “Did Cole just say that the baby wasn’t affected?”  Evelyn nodded, got up and hugged Cole, crying. 

                   “Thank you, Cole.  You’ve taken a great load off of our minds,” she said to him.  Cole, unused to being hugged, patted Evelyn’s back awkwardly. Evelyn let Cole go and fell into Cullen’s arms.  They held each other before Cullen knelt down before Evelyn, resting his forehead against her belly. 

                   Dorian smiled.  “So it’s a girl then?” he asked Cole.  Cole nodded.  “How wonderful.  We’ll have to start having some baby clothes made immediately.”  Dorian smiled at Evelyn and Cullen, who hadn’t moved.  “Congratulations to you both- don’t worry, I won’t say anything to anyone, not even Bull,” as he headed back upstairs.

                   Cullen got up and kissed Evelyn.  “So now that we have that load off, what do you want to do today?”  He looked at her, concerned.  She looked a little pale and shaky.

                   “I… think I need to go lie down,” she said.  She had been carrying this burden since she found out she was pregnant, and now that Cole had lifted that from her, along with all the excitement from the week, it had left her light headed.  She leaned against the desk for a moment, trying to collect herself, but the feeling wouldn’t go away.  “Cullen, I don’t feel very well.  I really think I need to lay down.”  She sat down in the chair as her vision started to white out.  Cullen knelt down next to her and felt her face.  She was clammy and shaking.

                   “Evie?” Cullen shook her gently, but she didn’t respond.  “DORIAN! Get back down here!” he shouted.  He picked Evelyn up as Dorian came bolting back up the stairs.  “Get Healer and send her up to our room.  Somethings wrong.”  He started towards the door, only to be met by Varric- who took one look at the situation and rushed to help Cullen.  As Dorian ran for Healer, Varric helped Cullen get Evelyn upstairs and laid her on the bed. Cullen knelt over Evelyn, slapping her cheeks, trying to get a response.  She finally looked at him. 

                   “Cullen, what’s going on?  I feel so funny,” she said shakily. 

                   “Healer is on her way Love,” he said, trying to sound reassuring.  “Are you in pain?” Evelyn shook her head.  That was something at least.  Cullen moved to the side as Healer bustled in to take over. 

                   “Well dearie, what is going on here?”   Healer looked her over, feeling her belly and forehead.  After asking a few questions, she stood up and looked at Cullen.  “Not to worry, not to worry,” she said to him.  “Just a little too much excitement for her condition.  She should rest in bed today and we’ll check her again tomorrow.  I know the big day is coming- so it’s important she rest today.  No getting up, and no more excitement today.  Do you hear me?”  she said severely to Evelyn as though she were scolding a child.  Evelyn nodded.  “I’ll send up some good tea and some food for you right away- you should feel more like yourself after eat.  Small frequent meals your Worship.”

                   Cullen breathed a sigh of relief.  Varric, who had been sitting and waiting looked at him.  “Wanna tell me what’s going on Curly?  What set this off? Is there something we need to look out for?”  Varric walked over to Evelyn and put his hand on her forehead.  He wasn’t very good at expressing emotion, preferring to show himself in his actions and loyalty- and he looked at Evelyn as a little sister.  He tried to watch over her as best he could, just as she had watched over him when Hawke died.  “Do you need anything Lady?” he asked her as he smoothed her hair.  He had told her a few days ago that he would be leaving for Kirkwall shortly after the wedding- she had smiled and wished him well, and promised help from the Inquisition if they needed it.  Her way of watching over him still, he guessed.

                   “You can start by telling me what you and Bull were discussing this morning- it looked a little suspicious to me.  I think you two are up to something,” she said smiling.  She had heard a few rumblings here and there about a party they were planning, but when she got within earshot, those people clammed up right away.

                   “You wound me, Lady,” Varric said, feigning hurt.  “Well, you’ll find out eventually anyway- just planning a little man party for Curly here, and Warrick too now that his news is out.  Just the guys, some cards…nothing special.  We were thinking tonight, but can reschedule for tomorrow if you’d prefer to stay here tonight, given the circumstances.”

                   “I’ll be fine Cullen”, Evelyn said.  “Maybe all of my sisters can come up and keep me company tonight? That would be nice and not too over-exciting.”  She looked at him hopefully.  Cullen gave her a level look as Chana came up with a tray of food and tea and set it in front of Evelyn.

                   Cullen nodded.  He supposed that it would be better to get this “party” over with tonight.  He had a feeling that it was more than cards, but wouldn’t ask in front of Evie.  “I’ll tell you what.  You make sure to eat and rest for a while, and I’ll send Mia and Rosalie up in a bit.  And Cecelia and Clarissa as well.”  He came over to kiss her and headed downstairs.

                   “Cullen, could you…send Bull up to see me, please?  I need to talk to him about something.” Evelyn said.  She hadn’t had a chance to talk to him yet about Clarissa, and she wanted to do it before he got too inebriated tonight.  He nodded and blew a kiss as he left.  Chana made to leave to leave as well, but Evelyn stopped her.  “Chana, I want you to stay for tonight.  You’re going to be my sister in a matter of days you know.”  She reached her hand out for Chana to take. “I’m so happy you’ll be my sister,” she said.  Chana smiled and took her hand. 

                   “Thank you…sister” Chana said, testing out the word.  “It’s odd to say it after calling you ‘your Worship’ for so long.  You better eat now or my future Brother-In-Law will get upset with me.”  She got up, after promising to be back later and left, leaving Varric with Evelyn.

                   As Evelyn reached for her tea, Varric asked again.  “You never answered my question. Is everything ok?  What happened that made you faint like that?”  She looked better, but he knew that she had been worried about the baby.  Varric was worried too- Cullen and Evelyn deserved every happiness and had come so far to have something happen now.  He had already started working on a story book for the baby, looking forward to holding that baby on his lap and reading sometime. 

                   “Everything’s ok Varric.  Cole was finally able to hear the baby and told us that everything is fine.  No anchor, no voices.  She’ll be her own person.  I guess between getting that load off, and all of the goings on this week, I got a little overexcited.  Healer is making me rest in bed today but I should be ok tomorrow. 

                   “A girl huh?” Varric said.  “Cullen will be outnumbered I guess.  So, why do you want to see Bull then?” 

                   “Yeah Boss, why do you want to see me?” Bull said as he tromped up the steps.  “You feeling ok?  Cullen explained that you had to rest for today and no excitement. If you’re not supposed to have any excitement, I’m probably the last person that should be here,” he joked.

                   Evelyn pushed the food around on her plate and asked Bull to have a seat. “I just needed your Ben-Hassrath eyes for a minute,” she said hesitantly.  She felt awkward asking, but she needed to know.

                   “This about that sister of yours?” Bull asked as he sat.  “Pretty thing, but jealous.”

                   Evelyn looked down at her plate. “Is it that obvious?” she asked quietly.  “I see the way she looks at Cullen and I don’t like it.  I trust Cullen completely, but I don’t know Clarissa very well at all, and I don’t trust her.  Maker that sounds like a horrible thing to say about my own sister.  Maybe I’m just being stupid and hormonal…”

                   “I don’t think so, Boss,” Bull interrupted.  “I was watching her during lunch that first day.  She is not happy that you landed a better man than she did.   You’re the plain one you know- you weren’t supposed to be better than her. Now everyone talks about you, you’re the center of attention, and she doesn’t like it one bit.” 

                   Evelyn groaned.  “Maybe I shouldn’t have asked.  You’d think knowing my gorgeous older sister is jealous of me would make me happy, but it worries me.  Do you think she’ll try anything?”  Evelyn eyed Bull worriedly.

                   Bull grunted.  “Could be.  She’s going to want to make herself feel superior over you again.  She’s lost the upper hand, being older with a soft husband.  She wouldn’t want her daughters looking up to you.”    

                   Evelyn pushed the tray away from her and sat up.  Varric put his hand on her shoulder. “Where do you think you’re going Lady?” he asked her as he pushed her back on the bed.  “You better not be thinking about getting up.  Let us handle this.  You know we have your back.  She’s going to be up here later- just don’t let on.  You know that even if she were to try anything, Cullen would never go for it- he loves you too much and he’s not that kind of guy.”  Evelyn sat back on the bed again and nodded. “Now eat up and try to relax. I know…I know” he said as Evelyn looked mutinous. 

                   Bull agreed.  “Let us handle this Boss. Even if she gets a chance to try something, you know Cullen would never go for it. That guy’s got it bad for you.”

                   “Thanks, guys.  I don’t think I’m going to feel better about this, but it helps to know you’re there.”  Evelyn picked the tea back up to take a drink.  As she finished her food, she heard a troupe of women coming up the steps.  Mia, Rosalie, and Cecelia appeared at the top of the steps, followed by Clarissa and her daughters and Chana.

                   Chuckling, Bull, and Varric took their leave.  “Bull,” Evelyn called after him, “you better not get him too drunk.”  Bull waved at her as he left, Varric following behind with a wink.  Evelyn shook her head and muttered to herself, “Why do I even bother?”

                   Mia hopped on the bed and looked at her.  “Cullen came and got us to sit with you tonight.  Are you feeling better?”  Cullen had told her earlier about their concerns about the baby- he was very worried.  He had also told her about his reaction to her drinking from the Well of Sorrows, needing to confide in someone that wouldn’t judge.  Mia didn’t, knowing he would never have said what he said if it hadn’t been for the lyrium withdrawal.  She was glad that Cullen was even around to confide in her- she had missed him and worried about him for so long.  “He told me about the baby. He’s so relieved, and I’m sure you are too, but you didn’t need to end up on bedrest over it,” she teased.

                   Evelyn smiled.  “I guess the stress of not knowing was weighing me down more than I thought.  I’ll be ok- just following Healer’s orders for tonight.  I figured since Cullen is now otherwise occupied, we could use this time for us ladies to get to know each other and visit.”

                   “Otherwise occupied?”  Rosalie asked. “Is that what you were talking to Bull about?”

                   Evelyn huffed.  “Yes.  Some kind of party at the rest tonight for Cullen and Warrick.  I saw Bull and Varric planning it this morning- something about men and cards.  I’m not buying it, but I know they won’t let it get too out of hand.”  She rolled her eyes.  “I’d be jealous, but it’s not like I can drink anyway.”  She looked at her two nieces and patted the bed. “Come sit by me.  I haven’t had a chance to talk to you too yet.”  Both girls brightened and came and sat by her.  Evelyn studied the girls- her nieces.  She had never had a chance to meet them before- they were both very pretty girls, and now that she was having a girl, she wanted to see what she was in for.  “Would you like to spend some time with me tomorrow?  I have some work to do in the War room if you would like to come along.”  They both nodded delightedly.  She looked at Clarissa, “If it’s all right with you of course.  You’d be welcome to come too, spend some time with your sister?” 

                   Clarissa declined.  “No thank you.  The girls may go if they like- I have to stay with Mother.  She’s not feeling very well.”  Noticing Evelyn’s questioning look she said, “Nothing serious.  She just doesn’t travel well.”  Clarissa actually had no intentions of looking after Mother- she would send Nicholas and Whitford to do that.  She thought she would go looking for Cullen, and see if she could get to know him a little better.  That would bring her Worship down a few notches.

                   Evelyn nodded and told the girls she would come get them when she was ready.  As the ladies chatted, some of the kitchen maids brought up food and drink for the little party, and Branson, Osborne, and Nicholas came to drop off the boys so they could go to the Rest.

 


	33. Chapter Thirty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More wedding stuff.

Chapter Thirty-Three

                   Meanwhile, things were getting started at the Herald’s Rest.  Bull’s Chargers, including the women had gotten everything set up when Cullen and Warrick arrived with their brothers and in-laws.  Varric has also invited Ser Morris, the quartermaster and Barrett the Horse master and Jim, the hapless messenger who had a habit of interrupting Cullen and Evelyn when they were kissing. 

                   Bull sat Cullen and Warrick at a table and kept the drinks flowing and the cards moving.  Cullen, nursing a mug of ale looked around at everyone in attendance.  He still sometimes he couldn’t believe the course his life had taken.  If someone would have told him that the man who had been tortured in the mage tower all those years ago would end up here surrounded by friends and family, including mages, marrying the love of his life who was having his baby, he would never have believed it.  The Maker had given him a great gift, a life he never dreamed he would have.  He had gone through his life with little attachments, making few friends, staying remote.  Evelyn had changed all of that.  Since he had joined the Inquisition, he had learned to open up and let people in- not only Evelyn but almost everyone here.  He had been blessed.

                   A round of toasts to the two grooms started- Branson and Osborne provided the warm, familial toasts to get started- wishing a good life, healthy family- all of the usual platitudes.  It quickly went downhill from there with Sera, Varric and Iron Bull providing the bawdiest and dirtiest toasts they could think of, and they could think of a lot.  Even Cullen had to laugh- wondering what Evelyn would have thought- and knowing she would be laughing too.  It was a good night, even when Bull brought out the dancers.  Cullen blushed furiously when Krem brought one over and put her on his lap.   He knew that Evelyn would think it was funny, but he kept his hands off of the girl as much as he could.  Luckily, Bull seemed to attract the most dancers, which was fine with him- not so much with Dorian, who was watching with raised eyebrows.   Shaking his head, Cullen decided to call it a night.  He was still worried about Evelyn, even though he knew she was in good hands for the evening. 

                   Cullen was heading through the main hall as the ladies were coming down the steps.  Mia hugged her brother and assured him Evelyn was fine- they had all talked until Evelyn had fallen asleep.  Kissing both sisters good night, he started up the steps to find his way blocked by Clarissa.  He nodded in greeting and moved to the side to let her pass.  She pushed him up the wall and ran her hand down his chest, smirking lasciviously.  “Well hello, Cullen.  Evelyn’s asleep, so maybe it’s time we get to know each other better,” she purred. 

                   Cullen cleared his throat uncomfortably.  “Ah…Clarissa…thank you, but I really need to head upstairs.”  He awkwardly tried to get past her, but she pressed him against the wall again, knowing that he would be too gentlemanly to push her away.  She knew that in spite of his good looks, Cullen hadn’t been with too many women and assumed he would be easy pickings.  It wouldn’t be the first time she had lured a man away- but none had ever been the fine specimen as the man standing before her, with the added bonus of being her sister’s fiancé.  Clarissa had always been the center of attention as the crown jewel of the Trevelyan line.  Osborne was handsome, and the heir apparent of course, but everyone knew that it was Clarissa who commanded all the attention.  She was still remarkably beautiful, and still kept herself trim and together, even after having three children, and she used that to her advantage.  Nicholas was content to look after the children, especially Whitford, leaving her to do as she pleased.  Of course, she made sure that the girls idolized her- she lived on adoration and attention of all kinds, and she wanted Cullen’s too.  Her mousy little sister had taken all of the attention away from her.  Clarissa had expected that the men of Skyhold would be falling all over themselves to attend to her the moment she stepped out of the carriage, but she had gotten only remote politeness and a few second glances from some of the younger recruits.  She had expected to preside over lunch that first day like a queen, but then SHE showed up, and everyone’s eyes went to her.  Cullen had barely even glanced Clarissa’s way- his eyes always on Evelyn.  Clarissa was livid about that- shown up by her homely, weird little sister.  She needed to get the upper hand, immediately.  She put her arms around Cullen and clamped her lips on his. 

                   Cullen pushed her away, pulling her arms from around his neck glaring at her.  “What are you playing at?” he said, fiercely quiet.  He knew that voices could carry in the stairwell and he didn’t want to wake Evelyn.  “Do not approach me again.”  He glared at her coldly before heading up the stairs, leaving Clarissa to stew.  He reached their room and sat down on the couch for a moment, collecting himself.  What should he do?  The wedding was only a few days away, should he tell Evelyn what her sister tried to do?  That would only cause more stress, which she didn’t need, but if she found out from someone else, she would be hurt that he hadn’t told her.  He quietly got undressed and slipped into bed beside Evelyn, wrapping his arm around her.  She stirred a little and rolled over.

                   “I was hoping you’d make it back tonight,” she said sleepily.  “How was your party?  Did they at least give you a pretty dancer?”  Cullen lifted his head and looked at her, surprised. He heard her chuckle.  “Cullen, do you really think I’ve never heard of a stag party?  It’s not like Bull and Varric were very discreet.”                

                   Cullen laughed.  “She wasn’t you.  Could never even compare.  How are you feeling?” 

                   “Sick of lying in bed already.  I don’t think I could be better than right now.  You’re here with me, we’re getting married, the world is safe, and the baby is OK.  What more could I want?”  slyly, she let her hands wander over Cullen’s body. “Well…there could be one more thing…”

                   Cullen leaned in to kiss her.  “Are you sure?  Healer would be very upset with me if I caused too much excitement,” he said as he started untying the laces on her gown.  How did she do this to him so quickly?  One touch and he felt like a teenaged boy with his first crush. 

                   “Well, she said no more excitement today.  It’s tomorrow now,” she said, glancing at the clock as she helped Cullen take her nightgown off. 

 


	34. Chapter Thirty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Still going on the wedding stuff. I forgot to mention in the previous chapter that I've seen "mamae and papae" on some tumblr posts- on Hotdadsofthedas. It's usually used for Solasmancers, but I really like the words and wanted to use them.

Chapter Thirty-Four

                   Cullen awoke the next morning to find Evelyn getting dressed. She smiled at him as he got up and started looking for some clothes.  The events of the evening before came back to him and he sat down suddenly on the bed again.  Seeing Evelyn’s questioning glance, he made his decision. “Evie, I have to tell you something…you’re not going to like it.”

                   Evelyn sat down next to him and listened to Cullen tell about Clarissa’s advances the evening before.  She shook her head.  “I wasn’t sure I should say anything about it- I don’t want to cast a shadow over these next few days- they are supposed to be the best days of our lives right now.  But I didn’t want to keep it from you either.” 

                   Sighing, Evelyn took his hand.  “I had a feeling this would happen,” she said.  “I had asked Bull about it yesterday and he confirmed my suspicions.  He and Varric said they would keep an eye on it, but I guess they were busy last night.”

                   “You knew?  You knew she would try something?” Cullen was shocked. “Why didn’t you say something?”  He didn’t have a lot of experience with relationships, but he had always been aware when a woman was interested in him.  He had been distracted this week with everything going on and hadn’t noticed Clarissa looking at him.

                   “I wasn’t sure what to say.  I don’t know Clarissa enough to know if she would act on anything.  We were brought up to be proper young ladies and men- I wasn’t sure what she would do.  I thought I was just being paranoid and I didn’t want to insult you by making you think I didn’t trust you.”  She looked at her clasped hands as she spoke.  “I’m sorry.”

                   “It’s all right love.” Cullen took her hand in his.  “But what do we do?  Do we act like nothing happened?” 

                   “I guess so.  I have to trust Bull and Varric will help like they promised.  I think the best we can do is carry on.  I’m spending time with Sophia and Piper today- I promised them they could come along for War Room business and I thought I’d take them on a picnic.  I won’t give Clarissa that satisfaction she is looking for by reacting.”  She thought for a moment. “You may want to be careful today though.  She said she was going to tend to Mother while I had the girls, but now I wonder…”

                   Cullen grimaced.  He didn’t want to have to even look at her again, much less talk to her.  He planned on some troop training after the war room meeting, but knowing she would probably be watching made him feel almost…dirty.  He smiled at Evelyn.  “Don’t worry Evie.  We’ll be fine.  Shall we go get some breakfast and start our day?”

                   “Fine with me,” she said. “Put some pants on first though yeah?”

                   After breakfast, Evelyn went to the kitchen to ask for a picnic hamper before heading to get the girls and asked Cullen to have Barrett saddle up Brutus and one of the gentler horses for the girls.  Arriving at her sister’s room, she knocked on the door, which was opened by Nicholas.  Evelyn hadn’t had much of a chance to chat with him- he seemed amiable enough, though.  Whitford was running around the rooms as the girls flustered with getting ready.  She turned to look at Nicholas again and noticed the way he was looking at her.  Well, looking wasn’t quite the right word- leering was more like it.  She backed away from him slowly, gathering the girls and taking them outside.

                   The girls flittered around her as they walked to the war room, talking excitedly and asking question after question.  They met Cullen, Josephine, and Leliana and went about business.  There wasn’t much to go over- no rifts had been reported, but they spent a few minutes debating if any more would appear.  There had been some reports of bandit activity that needed to be handled.  Evelyn knew that Bull was chomping at the bit for some action and they decided to send Bull, Sera, and the Chargers to handle it.  It was probably overkill, but it might send a message to deter others from a life of banditry.  After answering a few letters from Orlais, they called it a day.

                   Evelyn held her hands out to the two little girls and led them to the kitchen to collect the picnic hamper- which the cook had stuffed full to the brim.  Sending them on their way with some pre-lunch cookies for the girls, they made their way to the stables, to be met by Dorian.  “I thought I would join you if that’s all right.” 

                   Evelyn grinned.  “Girls, this is Uncle Dorian.  He’s our cousin and my dear friend.”  As they approached the horses, Evelyn let the girls spend a few minutes with Horse Master Barret, who showed them the stable and let them pat Brutus before getting ready to go. As they were checking the horses over Evelyn couldn’t help but mutter to Dorian, “Avoiding Bull today are we?” 

                   Dorian laughed.  “No, we’re fine.  He’s sleeping it off.  Between you and me I think he thinks he’s getting too old for all of those shenanigans.  As much of a show he put on for the dancing girls, he was content enough to sling me over his shoulder and carry me off at the end of the night,” he said with wink.  Evelyn shook her head and smiled as the girls came running over.

                   “Auntie, can I ride with you on Brutus?  Can I? Can I?” Sophia begged, clinging to Evelyn’s skirts.  “No.  ME!  I want to ride on Brutus!” Piper started clinging to her skirts too, both girls begging for a ride. 

                   Evelyn laughed.  How about Piper ride with me on the way to the picnic and Sophia ride back?  The other can ride with Uncle Dorian?”  Piper looked delighted and scrambled to get up on Brutus’ back, Barrett helping her.

                   Dorian mounted the other horse, holding his hand out to Sophia.  “Come on darling, hop on up.”  Sophia grinned and climbed up in front of Dorian, who gave her the reins.  She took them delightedly and he showed her what to do.   Barrett handed the hamper to Dorian and affixed some blankets behind Evelyn and they were off.  Taking the long way around, they rode to the little grotto that Dorian had taken Evelyn to all those months ago.  As they set up and ate, the girls asked question after question to both Evelyn and Dorian, about her hand, and his magic, and the battles and fighting.  They tried to make Evelyn promise to show them how to throw daggers when they got back but she said she had to ask their mother first.  They looked a little downhearted, knowing Mother would say no, but Dorian cheered them up with a little magic.  Evelyn grinned to herself knowing that they would probably shriek in terror if they saw what Dorian could really do.  After another hour, they packed it in and headed back to Skyhold.  Both girls had been delighted with their day and now adored not only their Aunt Evelyn, but their Uncle Dorian as well. 

                   He stayed with the girls while she went to find Clarissa- knocking at the door to their rooms.  Nicholas answered again and invited Evelyn in.  She stayed standing in the doorway, uncomfortable from before.  “I just wanted to get permission from you before promising the girls.  They want to learn how to throw knives, but I wouldn’t feel right about it without checking with you first.  They’ll be safe- they’re very dulled blades.”  Nicholas leaned against the door frame, looking Evelyn up and down, eyes lingering on her breasts and belly.  Evelyn shuddered inwardly as she waited for him to answer.

                   “Well.  Maybe you should come in to discuss it for a while.  I have the place to myself at the moment…maybe I’d like a private lesson myself.” He took her hand and put his arm around her waist, trying to pull her into the room.  He stopped suddenly when he felt a blade at his neck.  He slowly pulled his arm away from her and held his hands up as if to yield.  “No need for violence now…your…Worship,” he said, backing away.  Evelyn quietly sheathed her dagger and took her leave.  “I’ll take this as your permission to teach your daughters.  I have a feeling these skills may come in handy for them in the future.”  She whirled around and stalked away angrily.

                   As she came back to the courtyard, she noticed that Cullen was putting the new recruits through their paces with Bull and an audience of onlookers.  Bull winked at her as they passed- Evelyn taking the girls back to where Cassandra used to practice on the dummies.  Evelyn gathered up a collection of practice daggers on their way.  As they made their way back, Evelyn noticed that Clarissa was one of the onlookers, her eyes leaving Cullen only long enough to glance at Sera, who was seated not far away twirling an arrow and watching Clarissa as well as the fighting. 

                   Evelyn started out showing the girls what she could do with real daggers, and warned them about what could happen with sharp objects if they weren’t careful.  Remembering how Clancy had taught her, she took each girl in turn, fitted a dulled blade in their hand and showed them the throwing motion.  They spent the next hour throwing blades at the dummies, sometimes they stuck, sometimes not.  Sophia caught on remarkably well for her age, and Piper did all right as well, for a six year old.  When the girls were done, and looking a little tired, Evelyn marched them over to Clarissa, assuming they would need to go down for a nap.

                   Excitedly, the girls chattered to Clarissa about their day- the war room, the picnic and the knife throwing lessons.  “Mother, I want to be just like Aunt Evelyn when I grow up!” Sophia declared, Piper shouting in agreement.  Evelyn hugged the girls as Clarissa took them away, berating them for not acting like ladies.  It saddened Evelyn to see the girls muzzled like that, but there was nothing she could do about it.  As she left, Cullen approached her, putting his arms around her onto her belly, feeling the baby kick.

                   “I take it things went well?” he asked. “Do you need to lie down at all?”  Evelyn glanced at Bull, who was showing a recruit a block.  The training was wrapping up for the day, so Cullen was free for a while.  She turned and whispered in Cullen’s ear that she felt fine, but that she did need to freshen up after her busy morning if he wanted to…help.  Cullen took her arm and started to escort her up the stairs rather quickly after that.

                   They lay entwined after loving each other, Evelyn talking about her morning with the girls.  She had really enjoyed her time with them, which made her a little less nervous to be a mother.  She lay quietly, thinking, as Cullen stroked and kissed her belly.  “Are you all right Evie?”  He sat up and looked at her.  “You got awful quiet all of the sudden.”

                   “I was just thinking about the girls and thinking about my childhood.  Do you know that the girls never once called Clarissa anything but ‘Mother’?”  Cullen shook his head.  “Cullen, what did you call your parents?”

                   Cullen thought about it for a moment.  “When I was younger, they were ‘mamae’ and ‘papae’ and when I was older, it was just ‘ma’ and ‘da’.  I wish they could have been here to meet you.  Show you what real parents are supposed to be.”

                   Evelyn felt a tear trickle down her cheek.  “I don’t want to be ‘mother’, Cullen.  Mother is so formal and unloving.  I want to be a ‘mamae’. Sophia and Piper were so spirited when we were together, calling me ‘Auntie’ and running around freely.  The minute they went back to their mother, they were so different.  Quiet, repressed.  I don’t want that for our daughter.”

                   Planting one more kiss on Evelyn’s belly, he moved up to kiss her and gently wipe her tear away.  “Won’t happen.  You’re not that kind of person.  You will be the best ‘Mamae’ to our little girl.  I just know it.  I can’t wait for her to be born and to see the two of you together.” 

                   Evelyn smiled, but grew sober again.  “I have something to tell you.  Nicholas put the moves on me today.”  Cullen sat up and looked at her.  “It started when I went to pick up the girls.  I was very uncomfortable with the way he looked at me.  When I went back later to ask permission to show the girls how to throw daggers, he put his arm around my waist and tried to pull me into the room.  It was disgusting, and not very smart,” she shuddered.  “I took a dagger to his neck and he dropped me pretty quickly.” 

                    “He put his hands on you?” he asked quietly. 

                   “No more than Clarissa put her hands on you.” Evelyn replied. 

                   They sat in silence for a moment before Cullen laughed.  “Well, no one said this would be a dull week.  You really took a dagger to him?”  Evelyn nodded.  Laughing again, Cullen leaned down to kiss Evelyn again.  “That’s my girl.  Have I ever mentioned how sexy you are when you have a dagger in your hand?”   He kissed her again, pushing his tongue between her lips and cupping his hand between her legs, making Evelyn gasp.

                   She reached down and felt his hardness growing again.  “I don’t think you have mentioned that before.  Why don’t you tell me all about it?” she said as she moved down the bed and took his cock in her mouth.  Cullen leaned back moaning as she licked his length, taking in as much as she could as she sucked on him.  Maker, she felt so good.  She kept her hand on the base of his cock as her mouth bobbed up and down on him, stopping when she felt him getting close to the edge, before starting again as he calmed down.  When he couldn’t take it anymore, he stopped her and rolled her over onto her hands and knees.

                   He entered her from behind, reaching around to brush her clit as he thrust in and out, all the while murmuring in her ear about how fucking hot she was when she was in her armor, fighting demons and bandits.  How he loved watching her teach her nieces how to throw. How he just wanted to rip her clothes off on the battlefield and fuck her senseless.  That last one pushed Evelyn over the edge, and she came hard, crying Cullen’s name as he came after her. 

                   They collapsed together on the bed, panting and clinging to each other.  Cullen held Evelyn close.  “I love you so much,” he whispered to her.

                   “I love you too Cullen,” she whispered back.  They clung together for a few more minutes before getting up to clean up and getting dressed again.  They talked about the rest of their day as they dressed- Cullen needed to look over some reports and Evelyn wanted to talk to Bull and Sera about the bandits.

                   Mia met them downstairs with Michael, who ran squealing to Cullen.  Cullen picked him up and put him on his shoulders, carrying him out of the main hall towards his office, Mia following behind.  Branson was hanging around the main hall too, visiting with Varric- he stood as he saw Evelyn coming and held out his arm to her.  She smiled and accepted, and they walked to the Rest. 

                   Evelyn sat next to Bull and outlined the problem with the Bandits.  Perking up, Bull and Sera agreed to go out after the Wedding to set it right.  Sera wandered back to her room upstairs and Bull turned to Evelyn again.  “So Boss, I understand there’s been some trouble…” he said quietly. 

                   She nodded.  “A bit.  Clarissa tried to put the moves on Cullen the night of the stag party, and Nicholas hit on me yesterday.  Neither got very far.  I may have scared off Nicholas, but I think Clarissa isn’t going to give up so easily.

                   Bull grunted.  “Damn.  Sorry about that Boss.  I figured she wouldn’t have a chance that night given all the activity.  I saw the husband looking at you the other day- didn’t think he’d have the guts to do anything. Do you want me to go kick his ass?” Evelyn patted his hand.

                   “Don’t worry about it Bull- Cullen and I can handle it.  Granted, I think Cullen would prefer that Nicholas be watched.  A dagger to the neck seemed to hold him off, but Cullen is worried about the baby.  I would say I can handle it myself, but I have to think about her now too.”  She sighed and jumped as the baby kicked.

                   “Hey, let me…” Bull said.  Evelyn laughed and stood, letting Bull feel the baby.  “Wow.  That’s so weird,” he said as he felt the bump beneath his large hand.  Bull was fascinated by Evelyn’s growing belly.  He had watched Evelyn grow from a shy little girl into this strong and confident woman before him.  Fighting beside her, drinking with her, watching her make decisions that would topple the most seasoned politicians had earned his respect and admiration.  And now she was growing a baby inside of her, creating life.   He was proud to be here and a part of the Inquisition, and he was proud to know her.  There was nothing he wouldn’t do for her.   

                   Looking at the clock, she realized it was getting close to the dinner hour and she was getting really hungry.  As she and Branson walked to the main hall, Josephine caught up with them, outlining plans for the shower tomorrow and the schedule for the wedding day.  Josephine stopped to ask her.  “Evelyn, who is going to escort you down the aisle?  I can’t imagine you would want your father to do it, but to not would be an insult. Warrick, or Osborne perhaps? Bull, Dorian and Varric have all offered as well.”

                   Evelyn thought about it.  She didn’t really want her father, and she realized that it would look odd for her not to.  She didn’t think he would want to walk with her anyway. “Let me think on it, Josephine.  Maybe I should stop by after dinner and have a chat with Father about it.”

                   During dinner, she sat between Cullen and Warrick, quietly talking about Josephine’s question.  Evelyn had not given the issue much, though, thinking that she would just walk by herself.  She thought back the conversation that she, Warrick and Dorian had that evening after the Winter Palace.  She was not looking for their approval anymore- that desire went when they appeared at Skyhold trying to enforce the contract.  Most of the people attending the wedding were aware of Evelyn’s family situation, and she knew that she could rely on everyone to keep a civil tongue about it.  Cullen had asked Warrick to be best man, and Evelyn had asked Dorian to stand with her.

                   “No one here would think the less of you for not having Father walk with you Little Bit,” Warrick, “but if you want to try, I’ll go with you. I know I was the one who encouraged you to not try, but if you feel strongly about it, I’ll support you.”

                   Cullen nodded.  “I will too, Evie if you want me to go.”

                   Evelyn considered for a while.  “All right.  Let’s go find them after this and see what they say.”  It wasn’t a conversation she was looking forward to, and she didn’t even feel she owed it to them to ask.  She had a feeling she was setting herself up to be hurt, but she steeled herself against it.  If she didn’t ask, she would never know where she stood.  She had been surprised that her Father had signed the contract cancelling her marriage so quickly, so she still had hopes that maybe there was some feeling there.  Mother, on the other hand, she had no interest in. 

                   After dinner, the three of them walked to her Parents rooms and knocked on the door.  Elaina’s attendant opened the door and admitted them.  They sat down across from each other awkwardly. 

                   Evelyn spoke first.  “Father, I came to find out if you wanted to walk me down the aisle or not.” She looked to the ground, waiting for an answer.  The silence was deafening. 

                   Bann Trevelyan, who had been reading a book and smoking his pipe when they came in sat quietly for a while.  He closed his book, put down his pipe and turned to give his daughter his full attention.  He considered her for a while, almost looking through her. The youngest, and the most timid, he had never really looked at her much before.  Aside from the occasional pat on the head like a stray dog, he never showed her any attention- he didn’t really have time.  All of his time was taken up with his duties as Bann, and training Osborne to take over when he was ready.  He could not afford to regret anything- it was too close to admitting he was wrong.  “No.”  he said to her, watching her flinch under his directness.  “But not for the reason you think.  I was never a father to you, and it’s too late for me to start now.  Perhaps if you returned to Ostwick, that would be different, but you live far away, with no plans to return.  You should have someone close to you walk with you.  I would not be offended.”

                   Evelyn nodded.  She was going to get up but sat down again.  “Why did you come?  You don’t have any interest in me, you never did.  So why?”

                   Bann gave her a look.  “It is our duty.  We are Trevelyans.  You may not have kept up your end of your commitment to us, and I guess we can’t blame you for that, but we will do our duty as the Parents of the Inquisitor, even if you are marrying a commoner.”

                   “All right then,” Evelyn said standing up. “I guess that is all I needed to know.  I’ll see you tomorrow sometime I’m sure.”

                   “Wait,” Warrick said suddenly.  “There is something I need to know.  Where is Hugh?”

                   Evelyn started and looked at Warrick.  She didn’t realize that hearing about Hugh had weighed heavily on him.  He had talked to Leliana, but with nothing more than a first name, and age and a vague description, there was not much they could do. 

                   Bann looked confused.  “Who?” he asked Warrick. 

                   “Hugh was one of Evelyn’s tutors when she was thirteen.  You hired him to teach her Orlesian history.  He was about thirty and bald.  That’s all we have to go on.  We need to know everything you know about him.  I need to find him.”  Warrick said, his eyes shooting daggers at his parents.

                   Still confused, Bann said, “I don’t understand why you need to find him.  Who is he to you?”

                   Warrick stood up and went to stand before his parents.  “He is the man who tortured and abused your youngest daughter.”  The elder Trevelyan’s looked at each other, not understanding.  “You didn’t know about it, did you? Because you didn’t pay attention.  He beat her, forced her to drink his “potions”, and then punished her when she got sick.  He broke her rib.  Did you know that?”  Agitated, Warrick waited for an answer.  “She had to have the Stable Master patch her up, and then the stable hands and servants had to watch her to make sure he didn’t rape her.  He finally left when he caught on that he would never be alone with her again, thanks to the servants.  Not to you.  The SERVANTS!” he shouted angrily.  “You left her alone with that man and didn’t care.  I’ll ask you again.  Where did he go?”

                   “I don’t know Warrick,” said Elaina as she stood up.  “He just left with no notice.  We have no idea where he went next.  I don’t even remember him.”

                   “I do,” said Bann Trevelyan.  “He was from Orlais, educated at the University.  LaMonte, his last name was.  Hugh LaMonte. I don’t know where he went after he left us, though.  I suggest you use your connections in Orlais to see if you can get his records.  I have no recourse there, so I cannot help.”

                   Warrick stepped back and settled down.  “It’s better than nothing.  Thank you.”  He turned to Evelyn and Cullen. “Shall we take our leave?”

                   As they left, Warrick turned around.  “One more thing.  Phillipe Remarche tried to assassinate Evelyn and almost succeeded.  Think on that for a while.”  They walked out with her parents staring after them.

                   As they reached the courtyard, they found Varric leaning against the wall.  “Hey, uh, Curly?  Got a minute?”  Cullen nodded and stepped over to him.  Varric whispered something in his ear and walked away, winking at Evelyn.  Cullen returned to Evelyn and Warrick stone-faced.

                   “What’s going on?” Evelyn asked, not liking the look on his face.

                   “It seems I have an unwelcome guest in my office,” Cullen said.  He looked at Evelyn.  “And you have one in our bedroom.”  Evelyn made a noise of disgust. Warrick looked confused.  Evelyn hadn’t had a chance to tell him about their sister and her husband yet. 

                   “Umm… remember when I asked you about Clarissa the other day?  She tried to kiss him last night after the stag party.  And Nicholas tried to hit on me today.  I thought my dagger to his throat would have been a deterrent.  Apparently not.” Evelyn felt ill.  She didn’t want to picture Nicholas laying naked on her bed waiting for her.  Ok, that just made her feel dirty.  “I think I’m going to pay a visit to your office, Cullen.  I need to find some reports that you left behind.  Perhaps Warrick could go with me?”

                   Cullen nodded.  “Do you want me to go to our room?” Cullen would love nothing more than to take care of this low life who put his hands on his woman. 

                   Evelyn smirked.  “Perhaps we could send Bull up?  Or would that be too much?” Evelyn remembered telling Bull that she and Cullen could handle this, but she knew he was looking for a little action, and it would be a good warm up for his trip to the bandits. 

                   Cullen laughed.  “Oh, let’s do it.  I’ll go with Bull to make sure he doesn’t get carried away.” He walked off to the main hall to wait for Bull as Evelyn and Warrick went off to the Rest.  When they got there, Evelyn bent down and whispered in Bull’s ear.

                   “Oh YEAH!” Bull trumpeted.  He grabbed Krem and stomped off to the Castle. 

                   Steeling herself, Evelyn walked up the stairs to Cullen’s office, throwing open the door to find Clarissa very scantily clad and draped across Cullen’s desk. 

                   “Well, there you are handsome!  Ready to continue our discussion from last...” she stopped short, looking at her sister in dismay.  Evelyn reached down and grabbed her sister’s dress and threw it at her. 

                   “Cover yourself,” Evelyn said sharply, “and then we are going to have a talk.  The three of us,” as Warrick entered the room behind her.  Looking petulant, Clarissa put her dress down and sat in the chair that Evelyn pushed before her.  Evelyn sat down on the desk and looked at her sister. Warrick came and leaned on the desk next to Evelyn.  Crossing her arms, Evelyn said “Why Clarissa?  Of all of the men in the world, why Cullen? What have I ever done to you to make you decide you needed to seduce the man I love?”

                   Clarissa laughed as though she were humoring a young girl.  “Why not?  The _Great Inquisitor_ ,” she spat.  “Ever since you became so famous, all I ever hear is how proud I must be to be related to the Inquisitor.  She’s so brave.  She’s so powerful.  She saved the Empress.  She saved the world.  All I am now is a pretty face compared to you.  You are still nothing to look at, but even my husband is enamored with you.  Orlais’ golden girl, the prize of Fereldan.  Even Ostwick has taken notice.  Now I’m just a useless housewife instead of the crown jewel of the Trevelyan line.  No one pays attention to me anymore.  So why not try to take your man? I might as well get something useful out of this, and the Commander of the Inquisition will do just fine.”

                   Evelyn shook her head.  “Do you really think you’d win?  Cullen told me what you tried to do.  Did you think he would keep it secret from me?  Do you think I took this anchor on purpose, just to mess up your precious little life?  I sacrificed all those lives at Haven, just so your husband would want me?  I fought for months in heat, cold, rain- fighting monsters, bandits, demons and all other kinds of mental things , just to take attention away from you.  I fell into the Fade, nearly dying in the process, tamed a dragon, drank from an ancient well and fought an eight foot tall Tevinter magister with delusions of Godhood, just so I could be better than you?” As she spoke, her anchor flared to life, her eyes flaring green. Something that hadn’t happened since her confrontation with Phillipe Remarche.  Evelyn continued, “In my childhood, I would have been thrilled to get some attention from you.  I would have idolized you.  You know that?  But you treated me with the same disgust our Mother did.”

                   Clarissa looked away before answering.  “Because I have standards.  I must have the best of everything.  The nicest clothes, the biggest house, the most handsome husband.  You weren’t pretty enough to be my sister.  You still aren’t.  You don’t deserve that man.  I do.  It’s not like he loves you.  He’s probably only marrying you because you’re pregnant,” she declared loftily.

                   Warrick slammed his hand on the desk.  “How dare you?  Cullen has been in love with her practically from the start.  He told me so himself. This is your sister.  Your own flesh and blood.  It was never a competition- you the eldest and prettiest, and she the youngest and promised to an Orlesian noble.  You’ve had it easy.  Pampered your whole life, the only hardship you’ve ever known is the one you made up in your head- the fact that your sister has outshone you.”

                   Evelyn shook her head slowly.  “You’re delusional and pathetic.”  She got up from the desk, clenching her fist to quench her anchor.  “Come on Warrick.  I’m done here.  Clarissa, I’ll thank you to stay away from me, you are not welcome to my shower tomorrow.  You can send your daughters with Cecelia- they are always welcome.  And if I ever hear you are treating those girls, or your little boy the way you treated me, I will find you and make you answer for it.”   

                   Evelyn had started to leave when Clarissa called out. “Do you think he would have loved you if you didn’t have that thing on your hand?  He would never have paid attention to you otherwise.”

                   Without turning around, Evelyn responded simply, “Perhaps not.    But I’ll thank the Maker for his blessing every day,” as she left the room.

                   When they entered the main hall, Warrick spun Evelyn around and looked into her eyes.  The color had subsided again, and her anchor was dormant again.  Evelyn asked him to go up to her room to see if everyone was still there.  She had no desire to see Nicholas in any stage of undress.  Before Warrick could go, the door to her room slammed open and Nicholas came hurrying out, clothing a little askew, and sporting a black eye, with Cullen and Bull following behind.  Bull slapped Evelyn on the butt on the way out, saying “Thanks, Boss, that was fun.”  He continued to shepherd Nicholas back to his room.

                   Cullen approached Evelyn, “Dare I ask?” he said.  Evelyn looked all right, and she was smiling at him, so he wasn’t too worried.

                   Evelyn shrugged.  “Laying across your desk, in lingerie.”  She kissed Cullen.  “Dare I ask?  Please tell me he wasn’t naked on our bed.”

                   Cullen cleared his throat.  “Let’s just say that we should probably send someone up to burn the mattress.” 

 


	35. Chapter Thirty-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yet more wedding stuff. Can you tell I had fun writing this?

Chapter Thirty-Five

                   “Here Evelyn, open this one next.”  Josephine handed her a package.  “This is from Empress Celene.  She understands the lack of invitation, and would not have been able to make it anyway, but she sends her loving regards.”  All the ladies exclaimed over the opal necklace that Celene had sent.  “She sent a wedding gift as well, which you can open after the wedding.” 

                   All of the ladies had gathered in the Rest for Evelyn’s shower the next day, Clarissa and her mother conspicuously absent.  Cecelia brought their apologies- apparently, they were tending to Nicholas who had gotten into a fight last night with a few of the guards defending Clarissa’s honor.  Chana humphed at that, muttering under her breath about helping clean up last night, and “honor, my ass,” or something like that.  Evelyn winked at Chana and invited Sophia and Piper to help her open the packages. 

                   As the ladies mingled, Evelyn found herself standing next the Leliana, who had been standing quietly in the back most of the time.  They both missed Cassandra and wished she could have been there to take part, understanding that of course, the new Divine had a lot on her plate.  They quietly discussed and compared notes as to who would be leaving Skyhold soon- Varric and Vivienne would be leaving shortly after the wedding.  Dorian had been receiving letters from his Father and someone called Maevaris, and he would need to leave eventually, but he had promised to stay until the baby was born.  As far as they knew, the rest would be staying on indefinitely.  Evelyn knew that she would be able to keep Bull and his Chargers busy, and Sera and Cole would have their place as well.  Leliana shook her head as if to rid herself of errant thoughts. “Come, Evelyn, let’s discuss this another time.  This is your time to enjoy.”  Evelyn nodded and went to go spend more time with everyone.  Cullen’s family would be leaving not long after the wedding, and Evelyn would be sad to see them go.  She had already begun to think of them as her own family, and couldn’t wait to move near them in the future. 

                   As the party wound down, Evelyn had the gifts moved back to her room, and business in the Rest continued, as usual, Bull coming back in to regain his usual seat.  A little while later, Osborne and Warrick came in and sat down with Evelyn and Chana at a table.  Evelyn found herself looking at her two handsome brothers, remembering when they had first arrived at Skyhold and how it had sent her into a panic attack.  She barely knew Osborne, but they had grown closer as he had heard more of her story, not only of her time in the Inquisition but of the childhood he had not known about.  Evelyn sat quietly for a moment, thinking about her brothers, and made a decision. “Osborne, would you walk me down the aisle with Dorian tomorrow?”

                   Osborne looked at her for a moment, surprised that she would ask.  He already knew about her conversation with Father- Warrick had told him about it.  He had not even considered that she would ask him, even though they had developed a good relationship over the week, and Cecelia and Evelyn adored each other.  He swallowed, welling up with emotion- regret for not spending more time with her as a child, and gratitude that she didn’t hold a grudge and said, “Of course, Evelyn.  I would love that.”  Evelyn smiled and got up to hug her big brother. 

                   As Evelyn wiped her tears, Vivienne approached and asked to borrow her for a few moments.  “My dear, you’ve been so busy, I haven’t had a chance to give this to you.  It was finished a few days ago.”  Vivienne handed her a small box, which contained Cullen’s wedding ring.  Evelyn had asked Vivienne to order it for her since she knew all the best places, and Evelyn wanted something special.  The ring was Silverite, and Evelyn had asked Dagna to work some runes into it that would help soothe his lyrium withdrawals.  It had turned out better than she could have hoped for, and she couldn’t wait to give it to him.  Thanking Vivienne profusely, she saw Dorian coming in and slipped the box to him.  He smiled when he looked at the ring and put the ring in his robes to keep for the next day, promising to guard it with his life.  Soon after, Cullen arrived to take Evelyn to dinner, and a large group set out for the main hall.  It was a lively dinner, with toasts and bawdy jokes all around, and Evelyn laughed until she was breathless.  She was starting to feel tired, but before Cullen could get up to escort her, she found herself being grabbed by Mia and Rosalie. “Oh no you don’t, Brother,” Mia said as she forced Cullen back into his seat.  “You sleep in your old room tonight. The girls are having a slumber party.  Now give her a kiss, and make it count because it’s the last you get until tomorrow.” 

                   Smirking, Cullen got up and grabbed Evelyn, dipping her down for a long lingering kiss, before whispering in her ear, “I can’t wait to marry you tomorrow.”  He stood Evelyn back up and Mia and Rosalie hustled her to her room as everyone in the dining room hooted and hollered. 

                   Evelyn awoke in the middle of the night and sat up to see all of her friends and family sleeping on cots that had been brought up, her two young nieces sleeping in bed with her.  Restlessly, she tried to go back to sleep, but she soon realized that was just not going to happen.  She quietly got up and picked her way through all of the sleeping women and went out onto her balcony. 

                   She sat down in one of the chairs and grabbed one of the blankets she kept out there and snuggled underneath it.  She thought back to before she and Cullen got together.  She remembered the first time she saw him- when she closed the rift at Haven.  When he spoke to her, she shrunk back shyly stuttering that she would try her best. She felt like such an idiot. She had talked to him a few times at Haven, but she was so self-conscious she could barely respond. 

                   She thought back to Redcliffe when she and Dorian had been launched forward in time.  When they had found Leliana, she recalled the sick feeling she had gotten in the pit of her stomach, trying not to look at the bodies, afraid one of them would have been him.  When she found the journal entry talking about the Inquisition launching attacks on Redcliffe after she had disappeared, she knew he had died in the fighting.  It was all she could do to keep herself from collapsing and crying right then and there.  When she saw him upon her return from Haven, she had to stop herself from throwing her arms around him.

                   And then there was the horrible night when Corypheus attacked Haven.  When he had looked at her before leading people away from the temple, leaving her to cover for them, she thought there was a flash of regret in his eyes.  She had wanted to caress his cheek, or hug him, or just touch him, thinking she would never see him again.  She had managed not only to survive, but when she found her way through the deep snow, and he had picked her up and carried her to the healers, her fascination with him had developed into a full-blown crush.

                   “Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping?” she heard from the doorway.  She turned to see Mia standing there, smiling at her.  She came and sat in the other chair and grabbed a blanket for herself.  “You know, I’ve spent years trying to keep in contact with Cullen, without much success.  It wasn’t until after he fell in love with you that he started writing again.”

                   Evelyn nodded, “I found one of your letters sitting on his desk one day- you were pretty frustrated.  Cullen had just been dealing with my family- and I commented to him that he was lucky that he had siblings who wanted to spend time with him.  After seeing my parents, and getting a better idea of the life I had led, he got pretty quiet.  A few days later, I found him writing you a letter.”

                   They sat companionably in silence for a while.  “The other day, that Cole?  He came up to me, muttering something about “safe and solid, protecting and proud”.  I got the feeling he was talking about Cullen.  And I think he’s right- you two are good together.”

                   “Thank you, Mia.  I think so too.”  Evelyn stood up.  “I think I’m ready to try to get some sleep again,” she said, as she headed back into her room.

                   Evelyn wasn’t the only one not sleeping that night.  Cullen lay in bed, wide awake.  He too was thinking back through their life so far. Their first meeting, when she came running over the hill, daggers in hand, launching herself headfirst at a demon plunging her daggers in before disappearing and reappearing behind another demon, drawing her blade across its throat.  He was mesmerized to the point he almost forgot to fight.  Then when he actually talked to her, she blushed and stammered.  For someone to command a battlefield the way she did, but to barely speak, and never look him in the eye the rest of time- he was fascinated.  He tried to talk to her at Haven a few times, but she always rushed off, muttering something about having to see Mother Giselle, or Solas, or someone other than him.  He had resigned himself to just being a friend, until that night.  She stood up again after closing the breach, smiling.  That night, when the army invaded, he fought beside her, helping save the civilians before watching the dragon take them down.  When he had to send her back to buy them some time, it almost killed him.  He had wanted to reach out to her, hold her close, something, hoping she would come back.  When they had made camp, he paced back and forth, watching from the direction of Haven, hoping to see her.  Cassandra tried to get him to rest, but he refused.  When she stumbled in, collapsing, he was the first to reach her, picking her up in his arms and carrying her to the healers.  She was so small, shivering in his arms- he lost his heart to her that day.

                   When she raised the sword after accepting the name of Inquisitor, he couldn’t stop looking at her.  He couldn’t reconcile the fierce warrior with the shy girl he had come to admire so much.  He knew he had to find a way to talk to her that didn’t involve them both fidgeting and blushing.  When Dorian invited him to the garden for a game of chess, and she had appeared, there had been something different about her.  Cullen had never paid much attention to what women wore, or hair and makeup and things like that, but he noticed her.  How could he not?  She had shone with a new confidence when she approached them, and actually spoke without stammering, even joking and flirting a little.  It had encouraged him to be a little forward too, sitting next to her at lunch and seeing her off when she left for the Fallow Mire. 

                   While she was gone to the Mire, Cullen had overheard a few of the maids talking about Evelyn, and a “makeover” and had asked Madame Vivienne about it.  The whole concept had been so foreign to him, and even though he had liked her the way she was, her new self-assurance, though fleeting, was endearing.  Cullen smiled to himself thinking of Vivienne’s response.  “Darling, you can’t be confident if you don’t look your best.  We just gave her some confidence. It worked well for her I think.”  He later heard some grumbling among those same maids that he didn’t give them the time of day.  There had been a few more forward ladies that had approached him at Haven and at Skyhold, but he had always turned them away.  At first, it hadn’t seemed appropriate to fraternize with the workers, and then he wasn’t interested after meeting Evelyn.  When Evelyn had told him about her mother’s disappointment in her plain looks, he didn’t understand what she had meant.  Evelyn had been beautiful from the first time they met, a mixture of ferocity and introversion.  She showed wisdom in her decisions and a diplomacy that was rare in a person her age, and she was unfailingly kind. She had managed to recruit all of her trusted companions, and keep them happy, in spite of all the different personalities- making sure their needs were met, putting their personal quests ahead of her own troubles.   Maker, he was a lucky man, and he was never going to forget that.

 


	36. Chapter Thirty-Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The wedding! I have to give credit where credit is due because even though I've been married for a while, I'm apparently crap at writing wedding ceremonies. Here are the websites where I got my stuff from:  
> https://www.smore.com/  
> http://www.weddedyourway.com/  
> http://www.themarryingman.org/

Chapter Thirty-Six

                   “Cousin…” Dorian couldn’t find words.  The wedding was about to begin and Dorian and Osborne had gone to collect Evelyn, who had been waiting in the War room with Josephine.  Evelyn had chosen a simple white dress with long flowing sleeves and a wreath of flowers in her hair.  Chana had insisted on doing her hair and makeup and Mia and Rosalie had helped her dress.  Dorian stopped short as he entered the room and Evelyn turned to look at him.  “You’re…” he fell silent.  
                  

                   “Breathtaking?” Osborne finished.  He stepped up to his little sister and lightly touched the flowers in her hair.  Josephine brought over a bouquet of crystal grace wrapped in lace and ribbons and gave it to her as Osborne and Dorian both offered their arms to her to escort her to the garden. Josephine followed behind making last minute adjustments and fussing over her until the last possible minute.

                   Dorian kept his eyes on Evelyn the entire time they were walking.  His dearest friend, and distant cousin, his confidante, and his savior, was getting married.  She deserved every happiness after a lifetime of neglect, loneliness, abuse, and war.  He remembered that day on the balcony when she had first opened up to him- it now seemed like it was years ago.

                   As they stepped out to the garden, Evelyn stopped, her nerves getting the better of her.  There were so many people, and they were all looking at her.  She felt herself shrinking back, but then she looked ahead to the large flowered arch that had been especially constructed for the wedding.  Flowered garlands were everywhere, the garden had never looked so beautiful- every girl’s dream.  To Evelyn’s surprise, standing under the arch was Cassandra in all of her Divine glory.  She had quietly come in the night before to surprise her friends and planned on spending a few days at Skyhold after the wedding to see Varric and Vivienne off.  As glad as she was to see Cassandra, her heart stopped when she saw Cullen standing next to her. 

                   The shyness and hesitation she felt went away at the sight of him.  Instead of wearing his dress uniform from the Winter Palace, as Evelyn assumed he would, he had opted for a simple white button down shirt and khaki pants, and he had never looked more beautiful to her then he did at that moment. She went from practically having to be held up by Osborne and Dorian to them practically having to hold her back.  As they made their way to the wedding arch, Cullen smiled.  Watching Evelyn walk towards him in her wedding dress, smiling and beautiful was a sight he would remember for the rest of his life.

                   When they reached the arch, Osborne kissed Evelyn on the cheek and took his seat, and Dorian took his place at Evelyn’s side, as Warrick had taken his place at Cullen’s.  Cullen took Evelyn’s arm in his as they stood before Cassandra, who waited to speak as the people took their seats.

                   “To all present I say: We are gathered here, not to witness the beginning of what will be, but rather what already is.  We do not create this marriage because we cannot. We can and do, however, celebrate with Cullen and Evelyn the wondrous and joyful occurrence that has already taken place in their lives, and the commitment they make today.”

                   As Cassandra continued to through the ceremony, Cullen and Evelyn snuck glances at each other as often as they could, barely taking in anything Cassandra was saying.  Finally, it was time to turn to each other and make their vows.

                   “Do you, Cullen Stanton Rutherford, take Evelyn Grace Trevelyan to be your wife, to be her constant friend, her partner in life and her true love?  To love her without reservation, honor and respect her, protect her from harm, comfort her in times of distress, and grow with her in mind and spirit?”

                   “I do” Cullen responded as he slipped a ring on Evelyn’s finger.  It was a beautiful, made of fade touched everite and dawnstone entwined.  It looked like Cullen had the same idea with having runes etched into it.

                   “Do you, Evelyn Grace Trevelyan, take Cullen Stanton Rutherford to be your husband, to be his constant friend, his partner in life, and his true love?  To love him without reservation, honor and respect him, protect him from harm, comfort him in times of distress and to grow with him in mind in spirit?

                   “I do,” said Evelyn as she slipped the ring on his finger.  They looked into each other’s eyes, both tearing up as they gazed at each other. 

                   Cassandra continued, “May you always need one another, not to fill an emptiness, but to help each other know your fullness.  May you want one another, but not out of lack.  May you embrace one another, but not encircle one another.  May you succeed in all important ways with each other, and not fail in the little graces.  May you have happiness, and may you find it in making one another happy.  May you have love, and may you find it in loving one another.”

                   “Now that you have given yourselves to each other with solemn vows, and the giving and receiving of rings, in front of the Maker and all who are assembled here, it is with great joy that I pronounce you husband and wife.  You may now kiss your bride.”

                   Cullen gathered Evelyn into his arms and brought his lips gently to hers in a lingering kiss as the crowd stood and cheered. Their kiss deepened as the sounds of cheering disappeared around them, leaving them focused only on each other.

 


	37. Chapter Thirty-Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's a wedding without a party, and a little post wedding smut?

Chapter Thirty-Seven

                   The party started almost immediately with everyone, save a few carrying on into the main hall to start the drinks flowing.  The few stayed behind, Warrick, Chana, Cassandra, Evelyn, Osborne and his family, and Dorian, while Mother Giselle and Cullen led the guests along.  With Osborne standing by Warrick and Evelyn standing by Chana, Cassandra performed a similar wedding ceremony for Warrick and Chana, with Chana making her elven vows.  Warrick was glad that Osborne was here for his wedding, and that he was able to start a relationship with him.  It made him sad that so much time had been wasted before adding another loving sibling to his life.  As everyone made their congratulations to the newer happy couple, they went inside to meet the rest of the party.  They had removed the throne and replaced it with a head table, which Evelyn begged Chana and Warrick share with them.  Chana refused, not wanting any attention on her.  She preferred to stay in the shadows, a feeling Evelyn knew only too well but had been forced to give up.

                   The meal was delicious and a rollicking good time with toasts from Warrick and Dorian- but Evelyn and Cullen barely ate.  Between all of the glass clinking for kisses, and just gazing at each other, hardly daring to believe they were married, they had forgotten all about dinner.  There were more speeches all around, including Healer, who used her toast to remind Evelyn to eat so she wouldn’t pass out from excitement. 

                   As the meal and some of the tables were cleared away, the music and dancing began.  All eyes were on her and Cullen as they danced the first dance.  She was lucky that Josephine had warned them in advance about this- neither she nor Cullen were dancers, but no one seemed to care about that.  The way they looked at each other as they danced brought tears to people’s eyes.  When they had finished, they took the time to mingle with their guests, Evelyn going right to Cassandra immediately- she had missed her friend.  They visited for a while, promising to go for a ride together before Cassandra had to leave again.  Evelyn could tell that her friend was very uncomfortable in her Divine outfit, and let her go so she could change and relax and have some respite from the constant demands of her position. 

                   Evelyn tried to spend time with everyone that evening, including her parents, who were sitting quietly in the corner.  Her father spoke with her, trying to make an effort, but her mother stood stone-faced, not only still annoyed at the loss of her gold still, but also that Warrick not only quit the Templars but married an elf to boot.  Outrageous.  As Evelyn moved on to other guests, she noticed Clarissa and Nicholas watching her and Cullen, still disgruntled.  Not bothering to dignify them with any attention, she saw Mia and Rosalie and headed toward them smiling, only to be pulled to the dance floor by Branson.  “Well Sister, I dance about as well as Cullen does, so shall we give it a whirl?”  They danced around the floor laughing, as Cullen was pulled out on the floor by both Mia and Rosalie.  Branson sobered for a moment.  “I hope you and Cullen will move to South Reach soon.  It’s been nice being able to spend time with my older brother again, I don’t want to miss any more time.”

                   “I hope so too, Branson.  I don’t know a time frame yet, but I’m ready to settle into a more quiet life.”  Evelyn looked around at everyone.  “All of my friends are leaving one by one.  Varric and Vivienne are next, and then you all leave.  It’s a big castle to be so empty.”  They danced through the song, bowing to each other when it was done, only for Evelyn to be swept up by Dorian.  Everyone wanted a dance with her- Osborne, Warrick, Bull, Varric and even Cole took a turn.  Cullen didn’t lack for partners either- Cecelia, Chana, Josephine, Leliana and Mother Giselle.  Finally, Evelyn had to beg off- she hadn’t eaten much at dinner and was beginning to feel lightheaded.  As Healer bustled over to fuss over her and make her eat something, Cullen noticed Clarissa approaching him. 

                   Grinding his teeth, he stood silent glaring at her.  She had done enough, and he would not let her ruin Evelyn’s day.  Before Clarissa could even approach him, Sera flung her arm out and deflected her, pulling her outside.  That couldn’t be good, but Cullen didn’t really care.  He continued on to look after his wife, who was currently sitting at a table full of food while Healer stood over her glaring.  He sat down next to Evelyn and grabbed a little food himself.  “I’ve asked Branson to start scouting possible locations in South Reach for us,” he told her.  Evelyn smiled in agreement.  They sat at the table and watched the dancing, laughing as Dorian danced with Sophia and Piper and Mia danced with Michael.  Cecilia joined with her two boys and Rosalie grabbed little Whitford.  There were not many children, and Evelyn was glad to see them enjoying themselves.  Cullen put his arms around her as they sat at the table, putting his hand on her belly.  As they watched the dancers, he whispered in her ear, wondering when they could leave the party so he could get her all to himself.  Evelyn hoped it was very soon. 

                   As the evening went on, Evelyn found herself sitting and talking with Varric.  He needed to head back to Kirkwall to assist in the cleanup there- Evelyn had known that he would be leaving soon. While she knew that she would never share the same level of friendship that Varric would have with Hawke, but she would miss him.  He could always be counted on to cheer her up with a good story or a game of cards, even when he found it hard to carry on himself.  Evelyn often wondered what he had been like before he met Hawke- she would have liked to known him before he had carried such a heavy burden, but she didn’t dwell on it.  She was going to miss him, but she understood why he needed to go.  “We’ll see each other again Lady.  You can count on it,” he said with a wink. 

                   “I hope so Varric,” she said with a sigh.  “Everyone is moving on, and I know we will too.  It’s just hard- this is the first real family I’ve had.” 

                   “Well, lucky you get on with Curly’s family so well.  I know you’ll be fine.  It’s hard for me too- I would love to stay here- almost everyone I cared about in Kirkwall is gone, but all of my business is there and they need my help.”

                   Evelyn hugged Varric and went on to talk to the other guests.  She felt Cullen’s eyes on her as she visited with people, and knew that he was thinking about finally getting her alone.  She couldn’t say the thought hadn’t crossed her mind.  She walked over to where he was standing and took his hand.  She noticed that a lot of people had cleared out, only a few hard partiers were left, and since the band was beginning to wind down, they were talking about taking things over to the Rest.

                   Cullen seemed to have noticed as well, as he had started leading Evelyn to their room.  As they climbed the stairs, Cullen stopped her and pinned her against the wall, nuzzling her neck and murmuring about his plans for the evening.  When they reached the final door to her room, Cullen found it locked.  Grinning, Evelyn held up a glowing token, and she held it up to the door.  “Vivienne enchanted the door so Bull couldn’t come in and sabotage everything.” 

                   “Good thinking,” Cullen said.  He could only imagine what Bull could do that they would spend hours cleaning up, instead of spending good quality naked time. 

                   As Evelyn opened the door, Cullen scooped her up and carried her through the door.  He carried her over to the bed and put her on her feet.  They stood and just looked at each other for a moment before he took her left hand in his and held them up so they could look at their rings.  It took a moment to sink in that they were actually married.  Cullen pulled Evelyn closer and gently brought his lips to hers.  He didn’t think he had ever been as content with his life as he was now, a wife and a baby on the way and he couldn’t wait to make love to his wife. 

                   He kissed her languorously, running his hands up and down her body, loving the feel of the smooth white dress over her skin.  He wanted to worship her tonight, for as long as they could manage.  He turned her around and started to unbutton her dress, slowly sliding the dress down her body as the buttons came undone.  When her dress was off and carefully put away, he turned her back around, and kissing down her neck, helped her remove her small clothes.  He stepped back to gaze at her naked body, taking her in and adoring her, before coming in to kiss her again.  Evelyn started to unbutton Cullen’s shirt, following the same path, kissing down his body as she unbuttoned and pulled his shirt off, starting to work on his pants.  As they finished undressing each other, Cullen brought Evelyn laid her gently on the bed. 

                   Exploring her body with his lips and fingers, his tongue flicked her nipple making Evelyn moan in anticipation for the evening that laid ahead of her.  She wanted him to take his time and fuck her senseless at the same time.  She ran her hands through his hair as he continued to explore her body, his fingers roaming between her legs and circling her clit as they felt her wetness.  She cried out as his fingers dragged across her sensitive clit- being pregnant made her so over-sensitive to every movement he made.  Her response made it hard for him to take his time.  He pulled his fingers away, much to her disappointment, and laid back on the bed.  “Come here,” he said to her as he pulled her over him so that she was straddling his face, a new position for them.  He ran his tongue along her center, his fingers coming up to play with her peaks as she threw her head back in pleasure.  He loved to do this for her, to pleasure her with his mouth, and he had overheard Bull talk about this position and how it drove the ladies wild- he was obviously right.  As he thrust his tongue into her, Evelyn bucked against him, mewling and crying out, her hands clutching the headboard for support.  Cullen kept up the relentless assault on her, alternating between dragging his tongue across her clit and flicking it lightly, as her hips rolled, grinding against his face.  Cullen grabbed her hips and held her down so he could bury his tongue as deep inside her as he could, his nose rubbing against her clit as he moaned against her.  The added vibration pushed Evelyn over the edge to the most intense orgasm she had ever had.  Cullen clamped his arms around her hips, holding her to him as he pressed his face into her, prolonging her pleasure as long as he could as she sobbed in ecstasy.  As she came down from it, Cullen released her hips and she climbed down from him and relaxed into his arms.  Cullen wiped his face and planted warm kisses along her chest and neck, his tongue, hot and wet swirling around a nipple as calloused fingers cupped her other nipple, making Evelyn moan loudly again. 

                   She reached for his member, wanting so badly to take him in her mouth. She pulled Cullen to sit at the edge of the bed and knelt in front of him, taking his length in her hand.  She traced her tongue along his length, Cullen shuddering and groaning with the pleasure he felt.  She wrapped her mouth around his head and moved it up and down his length, swirling her tongue around it as she moved.  She had one hand wrapped around the base of his cock and moved her other hand to massage his balls, both keeping in time with the movement of her mouth.  Cullen was trying to keep himself from thrusting into her mouth, she felt so good that it was difficult for him to stop from coming.  When he tried to stop her, she shook her head slightly and stopping for a moment said, “Tonight I finish you.  I have a feeling that we’ll have time for other things later…” before she took his cock in her mouth again.  Just the thought that she wanted to finish him this way turned him on so much that he knew he wouldn’t last much longer.   As she returned to what she had been doing, Cullen leaned back on the bed, thrusting into Evelyn’s mouth a little as she sucked his cock.  Moments later, his hips bucked as he came, crying out her name as he spent himself into her mouth.  She swallowed everything, glancing up at him before coming back up to join him on the bed. 

                   “Maker…that was…” Cullen stammered, looking for words, “incredible.” They cuddled together, Cullen’s hand on her belly.  Maker how he loved her, and their baby.  They lay quietly, feeling the new rings on their fingers, Evelyn scarcely believing that she was married to Cullen.  If things had gone the way her parents wanted, she would have been living in Lydes, her husband probably berating her every day for being a disappointment.  She might have had children, whom she would have loved, but would have been raised to see her as less than perfect.  She would have been a housekeeper, hidden in the back while her husband dallied around with fancier women, leaving her alone and miserable.  Instead, she had a husband who adored her, and a baby who would love her. A husband and baby she loved beyond all reason and would never take for granted.  She could not wait to begin their life.

                   Evelyn ran her hands up and down her husband’s body as they lay together.  She loved to feel his muscles play under his skin as he moved, as much as she loved watching him when he trained his recruits.  She remembered the first time she watched him sparring with a recruit and he had taken his shirt off- they had recently arrived at Skyhold and she had just finished walking the battlements with Blackwall.  She stood up above, watching him strip his shirt off and couldn’t stop watching him.  She was glad that Blackwall had already wandered off so he couldn’t witness her ogling the Commander that way, but she just couldn’t help it.  She remembered blushing when Cullen looked up and saw her watching him, but he either hadn’t really seen her looking, or pretended he hadn’t- she never knew. 

                   As they lay quietly, Evelyn noticed that Cullen’s hands were roaming over her body a little more as well, his hands finding all of her most pleasurable places, as hers were finding his.  Climbing on top of him, she leaned down as far as she could whispering, “Is it later yet?”

 


	38. Chapter Thirty-Eight

Chapter Thirty-Eight

                   Cullen and Evelyn stood at the entrance of Skyhold waving goodbye to Mia, Rosalie, Branson and their families as they left.  The Trevelyan’s had left the day after the wedding, mostly to Evelyn’s relief, aside from Osborne and his family and Clarissa’s children.  Saying goodbye was hard, even though Evelyn knew that they would eventually live near Cullen’s family.  Branson had promised to start scouting locations for the Sanctuary, even though there was no official time frame on their moving yet.

                   Things were still busy at Skyhold.  Bull and Sera and the Chargers were out handling bandits and raiders at the moment, and Josephine was still handling many diplomatic duties as they came up.  There were people who had been displaced that needed shelter, many areas that needed rebuilding, the mages, Templars, and Wardens were all a mess, and everyone was looking to the Inquisition to help.

                   Due to her condition, Evelyn could no longer go out in the field.  She and Cullen had talked about taking a honeymoon trip, but these were still dangerous times, and they couldn’t risk being attacked, even if they took a contingent of guards with them.  They were content to stay at Skyhold together and had found plenty of quiet time in between visits with family.  With the departure of both the Rutherford’s and the Trevelyan’s, Evelyn knew she would have some free time on her hands.  Lady Vivienne was leaving the next day, and Varric was waiting for Sera and Bull to return for one last good Wicked Grace party before taking his leave. 

                   With many of her companions leaving, Evelyn found herself a little lonely, and at a loss for people to send out in her stead. She still had Bull, Sera and Dorian and Cole, and she knew she could also count in the Chargers and Scout Harding as well, but she wanted to find a few more people so they could send out well-rounded groups.  A possibility presented itself when Ser Barris, the Templar she had met at Val Royeaux turned up badly injured.  He had managed to survive the Red Templars at Therinfal Redoubt, which was a miracle in and of itself.  Evelyn sent him to Healer to be taken care of and found him a place to stay.  Another possibility was found in former Knight Commander Devlin, a retired Templar that Dorian had found in his Lyrium research.  He had come for the wedding and had been involved in a few discussions with Dagna regarding what he had found so far.  Evelyn planned on talking to both further in a few days to see if they would consider staying on.  Evelyn still wanted to find a few mages to round out the crews- especially ones versed in healing.  Losing Solas and Vivienne was a huge blow, and Dorian would be leaving eventually as well, so with Fiona’s help, they searched for a few mages among the Inquisition that would fit the bill. 

                   Evelyn had spent some time visiting with Cassandra before she left- noting with amusement that she had spent quite a bit of time by the practice dummies like she had before.  She never got to swing a sword anymore and was relieved to have a little time to hit things again.  As much as Evelyn loved what girl talk she could get out of Cassandra, she found herself talking with Cassandra more about the Seekers and the Chantry, their history and their possible future.   

                   The biggest role the Inquisition was expected to take up was the cleanup of the Red Lyrium, which was growing rampant in several areas.   There had been several research studies done trying to determine the best way to eradicate the lyrium with minimal casualties to the workers, but more study needed to be done and fast.  People were keeping well away from exposure to it, but it was only a matter of time before something happened.  Evelyn had agreed that this should be their main role, but she found out that it was also expected that they would continue with maintaining peace-something she disagreed with.

                   Because of this, it was only a few weeks later that Evelyn found herself in the War Room with not only her advisors but with King Alistair and Grand Duke Gaspard de Chalons in attendance. 

                   “I understand the need for the cleanup of the Red Lyrium Grand Duke, and we are more than willing to help with that, but I don’t see why you need the Inquisition to help with basic peacekeeping.  That should be left to you and Fereldan to handle,” said Evelyn.  “Even with our outposts, we are stretched thin and we need to focus on the lyrium.”

                   “I agree, Inquisitor,” said King Alistair.  “I’m not opposed to the Inquisition occupying the outposts, you can use those to aid in cleanup.  Our soldiers can handle anything else.” 

                   Gaspard sighed.  “I disagree.  We need Inquisition forces to help in Orlais.  Our lands are overrun, and our forces are also stretched thin.”

                   The arguments went around and around for another hour before Evelyn came up with a temporary solution.  “This is my final offer on this issue.  If we cannot come to an accord, then we are going to have to drop this for a while.  Your Highness, the Inquisition will occupy all outposts we have already taken in order to eradicate red lyrium, but leave any other issues to your armies unless you request it.  We can discuss the outposts again after the lyrium issue is resolved.  Grand Duke, we will occupy all outposts we have taken in order to eradicate red lyrium.  We will also assist in any other issues, in return for use of Orlais University to research the best way to clean up the Lyrium.  Again, outposts and other issues can be revisited after cleanup is completed.  Are we in accord on this?”

                   Evelyn held her hand out to Alistair, who shook it immediately.  She then held her hand out to Gaspard, who dithered for a moment.  He had wanted more from the Inquisition, more than Evelyn was willing to commit too.  It was almost as if he wanted to use them as Orlais’ personal army.  She pushed her hand closer to him, smiling sweetly.  “Are we in accord Grand Duke?”  Gaspard looked at her again and nodded, shaking her hand. 

                   As the meeting concluded, Cullen stepped behind Evelyn and put his arms around her, “Well done Love,” he whispered in her ear as he squeezed her lightly.  Evelyn was getting a little shaky- her pregnancy advancing and having been in meetings for most of the day, her blood sugar was plummeting and making her light headed.  He took her arm and escorted her to the main hall for dinner with Alistair and Gaspard.

                   After dinner, Cullen and Evelyn went to the Rest to welcome Bull and Sera back from their travels.  As they sat around chatting, they were surprised with a visit from Alistair.  He was dressed casually and was by himself, a welcome diversion that he rarely got to indulge in.  He shook Cullen’s hand before sitting.  “It’s nice to see you again Cullen, it’s been a long time.”  They talked about the last time they saw each other, and Alistair shared some stories about his travels with the Warden.  It was always good to get some fresh stories in, and between Alistair and Bull, there were new stories all around. 

                   “By the way, Boss, we ran into an old friend of yours,” Bull said laughing.  “Your old fiancé and his parents are in the Exalted Plains- they’ve been put to work cleaning up the ramparts.  They didn’t look too fancy anymore.”

                   Evelyn shook her head.  “Well, at least they’re being useful.”  She didn’t like to think about that time in her life- both before the Inquisition, and what happened after.  There were too many humiliating and terrifying moments that she did not care to remember.

                   After a while, Cullen noticed Evelyn was looking a little tired and asked her if she wanted to retire for the evening.  Alistair stood and offered to escort Evelyn back to the Main Hall if Cullen wanted to stay.  Cullen nodded- he wanted to talk to Bull for a few minutes anyway, so Alistair held out his arm for Evelyn to take.

                   As they stepped outside, Alistair spoke.  “Belated congratulations on the wedding and the baby, by the way.  Cullen is a good man.”

                   “Thank you, your Highness,” said Evelyn.  “I think he is too.”

                   “I think you can get away with calling me Alistair, between us at least.”  They walked quietly together for a little while before he spoke again.  “How are you feeling?  Is everything all right with the baby?”

                   Evelyn looked at him for a moment.  Men usually did not ask after pregnancies.  “I’m fine Alistair.  Everything is going well.”

                   “Elissa and I have been trying to have a baby for years now.  She was pregnant once, but she lost it,” Alistair said quietly, “I suppose the whole Grey Warden thing makes it harder for us to conceive, but it doesn’t make it any easier to accept.  She’s off trying to find a cure for the calling right now.  I’m hoping that if she is successful, that will change things.” 

                   Evelyn could hear the regret and longing in his voice and squeezed his arm.  “I’m so sorry Alistair,” she said lamely.  “I truly hope she succeeds.   I know we have some information on the false calling that Corypheus used on the Wardens, and Fiona is here.  She could be useful as well.  You are welcome to any help the Inquisition can offer.”

                   “Thank you, your Worship,” Alistair smiled sadly.  “I may take you up on that offer. Anything to get her home more quickly.  We’re not getting any younger.”

                   As they entered the Main Hall, Evelyn sat down at one of the tables and indicated that Alistair should sit too.  Alistair joined her.  “Is there something else your Worship?” he asked.

                   “Evelyn.” 

                   “Evelyn then.  Something on your mind?”

                   She hesitated for a moment.  “You knew Cullen before all of this?”

                   Alistair nodded.  “Elissa and I found him in the mage tower- we were with Wynne and Zevran.  It was terrible.  We found him right before we entered where they were turning mages into abominations- he was behind some kind of barrier.  He had been tortured and abused for weeks.  He begged us to kill the mages, but Elissa couldn’t do it.  I ran into him later at Kirkwall when I stopped by to speak to Knight Commander Meredith and Hawke.  He was still so bitter.  I’m glad to see he’s in a better place now.  He deserves happiness.”

                   Evelyn smiled.  “I agree.  I had one more question.  If you and Queen Elissa cannot conceive, what will happen?  You have no siblings, Connor is not eligible.”

                   Alistair thought about it for a moment.  “I supposed Teagan would take the throne, but if we outlive him, then I don’t know.  We still have time, thank the Maker.  I guess we’ll worry about it when the time comes.”

                   Evelyn nodded. “My offer of aid will always stand. I don’t know if it will do any good, but it’s yours if you want it.”  Standing, she said, “I suppose I’d better get to bed.  Healer gets pretty mad if I don’t rest enough.” 

                   Alistair stood and bowed toward her.  “I may stay an extra day or two and look over this information,” he mused, “It’s nice to get away from King duties for a little while.”

                   Evelyn laughed.  “Maybe I should turn this place into a sanctuary for reluctant dignitaries.  Divine Victoria was here for a few days, hiding as well.  You are welcome here. Good evening Alistair.”

                   They parted company, Evelyn heading up to her room.  Cullen came up a while later as Evelyn was reading in bed.  He sat down by her and looked at the book she was reading- “A Treatise on the Eradication of Poisons Most Lethal” and chuckled.  “A little light reading Love?”

                   “Hoping to find some ideas for getting rid of red lyrium,” Evelyn said, “Also works as an excellent sleep aid…unless you have other ideas…” she smiled coyly as she set the book aside.

                   “Well…I did have this one idea,” Cullen said as he started to untie her robe.

 


	39. Chapter Thirty-Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter gets a little darker. I had touched on an issue a while back with a tutor and realized I had never really put any closure on it.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

                   A few days later, Evelyn found herself riding Brutus alongside Varric on his pony as he departed for Kirkwall.  She had been going a little stir crazy staying in Skyhold and promised Cullen she would only ride a little way, as long as she took Brutus and Cole with her.  Since Varric was taking a specially selected group of soldiers to work with the people Varric hired to study the red lyrium he had found in the deep roads, Evelyn didn’t feel the need to take yet more guards.  They traveled a short distance before Varric and Evelyn dismounted and walked a short distance away from the group.  They sat quietly together for a few minutes before Varric bumped her shoulder with his.  “Hey, Lady.  This is only so long.   Not goodbye.”

                   Evelyn nodded.  “I know.  Doesn’t make it any easier.” She looked at Varric.  “I hope you’ll drop a friend a letter every once in a while.”

                   “Well, I’ve been known to write a line or two, so I think that can be arranged.  I’d better be getting some letters too.  Keep me posted with your whereabouts so I can come and see you and that baby.” He stood up and helped Evelyn up.  “You take care of yourself, and your husband, and your baby.  I know you’ll be fine.”  He hugged her close, holding her to him for a moment.

                   “You take care of yourself Varric.  And if you’re lonely there, you come back to me.”  Varric let her go and mounted his pony again, taking off with his guards.

                   Evelyn watched them leave and turned to Cole.  “Shall we walk for a while?” she asked him.  She took Brutus by the reins and she and Cole walked side by side for a time. It felt good to walk outside the confines of the castle, and Evelyn wanted to make it last a while.  Cole was a quiet companion.  Sure, he said strange things at strange times, but most of the time, he was watching quietly.    

                   As they were walking along, Cole stopped and looked at Evelyn.  “He’s looking for you.  The one that got away,” he said, looking into the distance.  “He wants to finish what he started.” Evelyn looked at him questioningly.  “So soft and sweet.  It will be so easy.  Grown up now.  Powerful.  It will be so much fun.  My little mouse.”

                   Evelyn’s blood ran cold.  Only one person called her that, and she had never told anyone.  “Cole, where is he?” she said as she slowly unsheathed her daggers.  She looked around and saw no one, but she felt her unease growing.   She wasn’t far from Skyhold- if she got on Brutus and took off, she could be back to safety in no time.  “Cole!” she said again.  “Is he near?”

                   Cole turned to her.  “You need to go.  Now.”  That was all Evelyn needed to hear.  Cole boosted her onto Brutus who took off at a full gallop towards Skyhold, Cole riding behind her.  They approached the gate, Evelyn yelling for them to open up.  Brutus came to a stop as they entered the castle, Evelyn scrambling down and yelling at the guards to close the gate.   Trembling, Evelyn clung to Brutus’ side, the memories of her past assaulting her.  Brutus nickered at her and nudged her with his nose, but she didn’t move. 

                   She felt a gentle hand on her back.  “Evie?  What’s wrong?”  Evelyn didn’t answer him, still clinging to Brutus.  Cullen looked around at the courtyard.  Nothing seemed out of place.  Cole was watching them, and watching the gate. “Cole, what is going on?” Cullen started between the two, trying to get one of them to talk.

                   “Him”, Evelyn whispered. “He’s somewhere nearby…” she trailed off. All of the memories were coming back.  She had told Cullen, Dorian and Warrick about them that night after she was attacked, but with everything else that had happened, and everything else she had seen in her poisoned dreams, they had been glossed over by more current events.  Events that she had felt had been in her control- Haven, Soldiers at the Wounded Coast, Hawke.  They had overshadowed the events of her youth that she had no control over.  Now they came flooding back.  The degradation, the beatings, the humiliation. 

                   “He’s been wanting to see her again.  Sweet.  Shy.  Unnoticed.  So easy to get his way when nobody sees.  Taking her now would be so good.  My little mouse.  To be mine finally,” Cole muttered as watched the gate.  Cullen stopped. 

                   Evelyn started to shake.  _She could feel his hands on her, brutalizing.  Hands on her mouth as he forced her to drink.  Hot breath on her as he waited over her while his potions took hold.  Hands on her shoulders, waiting to strike when she got sick.  When she answered a question wrong.  Hands on her shoulders slowly starting to travel down, first over her dress, then under.  His voice- cutting, cruel.  “Little Mouse, no one will love you.  Someday you will be mine.”  Hands on her shoulders…_

                   There were hands on her shoulders.  Feeling them there sent her into a shrieking terror, throwing Cullen’s hands off and clinging tighter to Brutus.  Cullen stared at her helplessly as she cried against Brutus’ neck. Cole appeared next to Cullen, watching Evelyn.  “She’s remembering.  Voice, hands, beatings, touching.  She made herself forget.  Now that he is close, it has all come back.  Talk to her.  Don’t put your hands on her shoulders.”

                   Cullen approached Evelyn slowly.  “Evie,” he said quietly, gently putting his hands on her waist.  “Evie.  Love. It’s all right.  Let go of Brutus and hold onto me.”  He carefully pulled her into his arms, collapsing to the ground with her as she sobbed her anger and helplessness.  He held her close, whispering soothing words to her as he rubbed gentle circles on her back.  They sat like that for a while until Evelyn calmed down.  “Come on, let’s get you somewhere more comfortable Evie.” He stood up and helped her to her feet.  As he led her inside, he looked to the guards. “No one goes in and no one goes out of this castle until we get this figured out.  Those gates stay closed.  Get a guard posted outside the Inquisitor’s door at all times.”

                   He led her up to their room and sat on the couch with her, holding her as she started to cry again.  “Evie, you have to talk to me.  Please. We need to deal with this.”  Evelyn sat up and tried to collect herself. “What happened- did someone hurt you?” Cullen asked. 

                   Evelyn shook her head.  “We were walking back from riding with Varric when Cole stopped and said someone was watching me.  Someone who called me ‘little mouse’.  That’s what Hugh called me- no one else ever did.  I didn’t see anyone, but we got on Brutus and got back to Skyhold right away.  Oh Maker, what if he’s in Skyhold?”  Evelyn was starting to panic again.  Cullen took her by the arms and made her sit still.

                   “Evelyn.  We’ll find him.  You are not that little girl anymore.  Look at what you have done- you are one of the fiercest fighters I have ever known.  You’ve bested demons, giants, dragons and an ancient magister.  You can take down a cowardly middle-aged pervert- I know you can,” he said to her.  Evelyn sat up straighter, took a deep breath and nodded.

                   “You’re right Cullen.  I can’t let him have power over me.  But it’s all come back.  Everything he did to me. Maker, I don’t know if I can take it.”  Keening, she fell to the floor, “Just knowing he’s nearby is bringing everything back.  What happens if I see him?  I’ll fall apart and he’ll get to me.”  As the memories continued to flood into her, she felt her gorge rise and scrambled for the chamber pot, vomiting violently.  Cullen hurried over to help her as she curled up weakly, sobbing in her misery.  He was at a loss for how to help her.  He picked her up and brought her over to the bed curling up with her and letting her cry.   

                   “Evie, sweetheart, I don’t know what to say to help you, but this isn’t good for you.  I know it’s hard, and he did horrible things to you.  But you need to think of your health, and the baby’s health.  You have to be strong for her, to protect her.  I’ll be here with you.”

                   Evelyn sat up and drew a calming breath, hand stroking her belly.  Feeling the baby kick helped ground her and focus, especially more so when Cullen put his hand there too.  Their baby.  She could do this.  “All right Cullen.  Let’s take care of this.”

                   Cullen took her hand and helped her up.  “Do you want to go back outside?  Let’s go find Cole and see what he can tell us.  Check on Brutus?  He’s probably scared.”  He took Evelyn into his arms and kissed her gently.  “I’ll be right beside you the whole time.”

                   They headed downstairs to find Brutus had refused to move from the spot she had left him.  Evelyn went over to him and ran a hand down his neck.  He nudged her with his nose and blew out his breath.  “I’m ok boy.  Thank you for bringing me back so quickly.”  She led him back to the stables and she and Cullen brushed him down.  Warrick approached them as they worked, a questioning look on his face.

                   “Little Bit, what’s going on?  I heard that Cullen ordered no one in and out of Skyhold after you came tearing back in and broke down in hysterics.  Are you all right?  Did someone hurt you?”  Evelyn swallowed and kept her eyes on Brutus, unable to speak.   

                   Cullen looked at Evelyn.  “Warrick, can you get Dorian and Cole and bring them here?  We need to talk.” 

                   Warrick looked around.  “Here?”

                   Cullen nodded.  “She needs to be by Brutus.  He seems to be keeping her calm.” 

                   Warrick returned a while later as asked with Dorian and Cole.  “Now, will you tell me what’s going on?”  Evelyn continued to pet Brutus, keeping her eyes fixed on him. 

                   Cullen looked at Cole.  “You know better than I do.  It seems that Hugh may be nearby.  What can you tell us?”  He kept his eyes on Cole hopefully.  Warrick went over to Evelyn and took her hand.  She didn’t trust herself to speak, fearing she would start screaming, so she kept herself fixed on her beloved horse.

                   “He was near when we were walking.  Watching.  Calculating.  Following.  We beat him here.”  Cole walked over to Evelyn and started smoothing her hair, trying to soothe her.  He could feel her emotions, that she was frightened and resolute at the same time. 

                   “So are you saying that he is not in the castle?  Can you find him?”  Dorian asked.  He remembered what Evelyn had told them that night, it still filled him with fury to think of the things that man had done to her.  He pulled Cullen closer and asked quietly, “I don’t like how she is right now.  What can we do?” 

                   Cullen shook his head. “We’ll talk about it later,” he muttered.  “Evelyn, we need to take this to the War Room.”  He could see her stiffen up.  Walking up behind her, he took her hand from Warrick and placed it on her belly.  “Love, we need to prepare in case he tries to walk in.  If he was a sadistic person working in the shadows when you knew him, he’s had over ten years to perfect his methods.  We need high security for this.  No one needs to know the exact details- no one outside of us will ever know without your consent.  Please trust me, my love.” 

                   Evelyn stood silently, one hand on her baby and one stroking Brutus, who turned and nickered at her.  She nodded her agreement.  Cullen looked at Dorian.  “Can you take her to her room and stay with her while Warrick and I convene in the War Room?  I will also post a guard outside.”  Cullen put his arm around Evelyn.  “I promised I would be by your side the whole time.  As soon as I am done with this meeting, I’ll return to you.”  He hugged her close, kissing her forehead and Dorian came to take her hand and lead her to her room. 

                   Within an hour, Cullen had called Josephine, Leliana and the remaining companions to the War Room.  “We have a situation that needs to be dealt with immediately.  Cole has sensed someone from the Inquisitors past is nearby.  Someone who is not welcome.  It is not known how dangerous he is, but we have to assume the worst and treat it accordingly.  The only description I have is from ten years ago- so we are looking for a bald man in his 40’s by the name of Hugh Lamonte.”  He saw Leliana start out of the side of his eye, but ignored it for the moment.  “For now, Cole says he does not sense him nearby anymore, but we need to be vigilant.  Evelyn will remain under guard- Dorian is with her now.  Warrick, Dorian and I will see to her.  For today, the gates of Skyhold will remain closed with no one getting in or out.  If anyone approaches the gate, notify me immediately.    Cole, if you get anything, let us know immediately.  We will reconvene tomorrow to discuss further actions.

                   As everyone starting leaving, Leliana approached Cullen, her face pale.  “I…I know that name.  It’s come across reports that I have received since Warrick asked me to look into it.  The reports are not good.  Horrific in fact.  I am setting my agents in the area on this immediately.”

                   Cullen looked at Leliana.  “Do I want to know what was in those reports?”  Leliana’s reaction scared him more than he could say.  In all of this time, he had never seen her look the way she did now. 

                   Leliana swallowed.  “I hadn’t said anything because my agents had found no physical trace of him- only the stories left in his wake.  Once we got his full name, I contacted the University as Bann Trevelyan suggested, and started tracing him as best I could. There are large gaps in his whereabouts, but more recent reports showed him to be in Orlais.  The reports are enough to turn your stomach- stories of getting hired as a tutor or house servant, poisoning parents and families and preying on the girls in the family.  Doing unspeakable things to the girls before finally killing them.”

                   Cullen blanched.  “Maker, what do we do?  Evie.  She’s already hysterical- if she hears about this, it will kill her.”

                   Leliana turned white as she made an association.  “Did he…?”

                   Cullen shook his head.  Looking around- there was no one else in the room.  “I promised Evie no one would know.  He beat her badly among other things, but the house servants caught on and protected her before the worst happened. I don’t want what this monster is getting out.”

                   Leliana nodded.  “Of course.  We’ll be as discreet as we can.”  She bit her lip, thinking. “What are you going to do to help her?  I take it from what I heard happen today that she is having some kind of flashbacks?”

                   Cullen nodded.  “She was hysterical.  She’s trying to hold it together, but she goes back and forth between being brave and falling apart.  I don’t know how to help her get through this, and I don’t know who can.  My sweet girl.  I don’t know what to do,” he said helplessly.

                   Leliana thought about it for a moment.  “Perhaps Mother Giselle can help. She’s been a calming influence on the Inquisitor in the past."

                   Cullen thought about it and nodded, excusing himself.  “I have to get back to her.”  Before going back to Evelyn, he went to the kitchen and asked for a food tray to bring up.  As the kitchen maids scurried around, Cullen spoke with the cook and briefly explained the situation and told her to let him know if she saw anything out of the ordinary.  After receiving the cooks assurance, he took the tray and headed upstairs.  He arrived to find Evelyn curled up against Dorian on the bed, sleeping.  Dorian eased out from under Evelyn’s arm and left her to sleep as they headed out on the balcony to talk.  Dorian told him that she had broken down again when they got upstairs, but that he had gotten her settled down to rest.  Cullen, in turn, told him about the plans for the day, and what Leliana had told him, both about what her agents had found, and recommending bringing Mother Giselle to help Evelyn come to terms with what has happened.  Dorian looked sick at the revelations- thinking of what could have happened to his dearest friend if the servants hadn’t have protected her. 

                   “Perhaps Leliana is right.  This is too much trauma for her to handle alone- perhaps you and Mother Giselle are the best to help her,” Dorian said thoughtfully.

                   “Me? I have no idea what to do,” Cullen said.  Dorian gave him a look.  “I know that I’ve had a traumatic past as well, but there were no magic words to fix it.  It took me years to recover, and I caused a lot of pain in the meanwhile.  It took Meredith going insane to help me see the light.  I can be there for her, and listen to her if she wants to talk, but I don’t know if that will be enough.”

                   “Talk to Mother Giselle then.  I’ve had my disagreements with her, but I think she will know what to do,” Dorian replied.  Cullen looked back at his sleeping wife and shook his head.  He had to try, for her. 

                   “I’ll talk to her as soon as I can.  I don’t want to leave her right now.  I promised I’d stay by her side.”  He went in and sat at her desk, looking at reports as Dorian chose a book to read and sat down. He didn’t want to leave her either.  He tried to read, but found himself distracted- he could see that while Cullen was trying to go over all the paperwork in front of him, his eyes kept going to Evelyn.  It thrilled him to see how much Cullen loved her- the way he looked at her, how he would caress her as he walked past.  The way she watched him looking for signs of headaches, and the way she brightened when he walked into the room.  They gave each other peace, and he knew it would always be that way.

                   They both started as Evelyn woke up screaming, both dropping what they were doing to be by her side.  Cullen put his arms around her and held her tight as she sobbed and pushed at him, trying to push Cullen away from her.  He clung on, refusing to let her go, whispering in her ear and kissing her temple as she slowly woke up and recognized where she was, calming as he stroked her.  As little confidence as he had in himself when it came to helping Evelyn through this, Dorian saw differently. Cullen took Evelyn’s hand and placed it on her belly, putting his over it, helping her calm down.  Evelyn exhaled and relaxed into Cullen’s arms as he wiped her tears.  “It’s all right sweetheart, you’re safe.  You’ll always be safe,” he whispered to her. 

                   Dorian brought over the tray of food and convinced Evelyn to eat something as Cullen explained to her that he wanted her to talk to Mother Giselle.  Months ago, Cullen had told Evelyn of the things that had happened to him at the Circle before he was rescued by the Warden, and how it had ruined him for a long time.  “I don’t want you to go through that love.  I want to help you learn to live with this.”  Evelyn nodded and took a few tentative bites, hoping they would stay down.   She could see the worry on Cullen and Dorian’s face and she wanted to try for their sakes.  She finished eating, and after making sure it was going to stay down, she washed her face and cleaned herself up.  Steeling herself, she went down the stairs to the garden and found Mother Giselle. 

                   Cullen came down a few minutes later, and after carrying the dishes to the kitchen went to the garden.  He didn’t approach, but he watched Evelyn sitting with Mother Giselle talking.  Giselle took her hands, listening as Evelyn spoke, sometimes crying.  They spent the rest of the day talking into early evening as Cullen sat nearby, watching, protecting and praying.  Eventually, Giselle motioned him over and spoke to them both.  Cullen could feel peace while he held Evelyn as Mother Giselle prayed over them.  He knew that there were still going be some sleepless nights, and some flashbacks and that it was going to take some time, but he could tell she was on the road to recovery.  He took Evelyn’s arm and they walked in to find some dinner.  She sat quietly at dinner with Cullen and Warrick, watching everyone as they gathered and spent time together, focusing on what she had accomplished with their help.  She noticed Bull eyeing her as she ate and wondered how much he was able to figure out- there were times that his powers of observation almost seemed like mind reading.  She nodded at him from across the room, indicating she was all right, and he nodded back, turning his attention to Dorian again.  Evelyn watched them together- their relationship had been a surprise to her, but a welcome one.  She wanted Dorian to be happy, and Bull seemed to do that-she got a kick out of watching them together.  Sighing, she looked over to where Varric usually sat, sadly seeing the empty chair.  She missed him.  He grumbled a lot when they had been out on the road, especially when the terrain was not very flat, but he always had her back, checking to make sure she was good after a fight. He was her solid presence, her brother.  She hoped that sometime, she could convince Cullen to visit him in Kirkwall, maybe before they settled in South Reach. 

                   As Evelyn watched everyone, her eyes settled on her husband.  She could see the tense lines in his neck and watched as he unconsciously rubbed his forehead.  She saw Chana looking at Warrick the same way, concerned at the signs of his withdrawal headaches coming in.  Chana and Evelyn glanced at each other and knew they needed to get them both into a quiet place before the headaches worsened.  Evelyn stood up and took Cullen’s hand and led him up to their room.  She made him some of the tea that Solas had left- it helped him fall asleep. After he got ready for bed, she massaged his muscles with a special oil that had been developed that helped soothe his tight muscles by warming and them cooling- reducing the tension.  He fell asleep as she rubbed his back, the tension was gone and his face peaceful.  Evelyn noted the rapidity of his symptoms abating as she had been asked by Dagna and Knight Commander Devlin, as they tried to determine the safest and quickest way to eradicate the symptoms.  So far, a combination of the tea, the oil, and the runes on Cullen’s ring seemed to be effective, and Evelyn hoped it would continue. 

                   She readied herself for bed and drank a little tea herself.  As she lay back, Cullen wrapped his arm around her and pulled her close, their mutual support and love allowing them to sleep until morning with no pain and no dreams.

 


	40. Chapter Forty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So the saga continues. There are brief elements of non-consensual sex in here- but nothing really graphic. I really appreciate the kind comments and all of the kudos I have received on this.

Chapter Forty

                   Cullen woke the next morning to find Evelyn reading in bed.  “Are you all right? Did you get any sleep?” he asked as he sat up concerned.  He looked at her closely and noticed that she looked rested and he relaxed a little. 

                   “I’m fine Cullen.  I woke up a little while ago and didn’t feel like getting out of bed yet.  I didn’t want to wake you, so I just grabbed a book.  It’s nice to relax for a bit.”  She put the book aside and turned to him, putting her arm around him.  “Are you well?” she asked.  “You look better.”

                   Cullen kissed her on the cheek and nuzzled against her neck.  “I’m fine.  That oil you used works miracles I think.”  He caressed her swollen belly, feeling himself stirring as he felt the baby kick against him.  “I guess she’s awake too yeah?” he murmured as his hands started to roam over Evelyn’s body.  He felt her stiffen for a moment and stopped, watching her.  He didn’t want to rush her after yesterday’s events, so he took his cues from her.  

                   Evelyn did tense up, but she stopped herself.  Mother Giselle had told her that she could try to resume relations with Cullen when she was ready and if she felt herself starting to panic, to remember the feeling of Cullen’s hands on her vs. Hugh’s, and to remember the difference between love and obsession.  After a moment, she understood what Mother Giselle had meant, and took Cullen’s hand and brought it to her breast.  “It’s ok Cullen.  I’m with you and I’m safe.  Make love to me.”  Cullen gently obliged, going slowly to make sure she stayed calm and happy.  He whispered loving phrases in her ear as he pleasured her, doing all the things she loved best.  As they came together, they held each other, sated and sweating, feeling complete in each other.

                   An hour later, Evelyn was down by Brutus, having been told by Horsemaster Barrett that he was tense from yesterday yet.  She was grooming him and letting him know she was all right when the alarm bells rang.  She stood frozen for a moment, feeling for the dagger she kept hidden.  There was a commotion at the front gates, and she took off as quickly as she could manage, Brutus following closely behind.  Warrick ran to meet her, a stricken look on his face.  “Little Bit, the soldiers that left with Varric have returned.  With Bianca and a note.”  Evelyn paled.  No.  Please Maker, not her friend.  She took the note and read it.

                   “ _My little Mouse.  How I have missed you all these years.  The thought of how much fun we could have had makes me long to see you even more.  I have your dwarf.  He is unharmed for the time being, but that could change the longer I must wait for you.  You will come alone and unarmed to the place indicated on the map.  Every moment you wait brings your little friend closer to death._

                   Evelyn stared at the map.  Varric.  Maker preserve them all, she needed to do something.  She saw Cullen approaching and silently held the letter to him.  He looked up at her after she read it.  “I can’t let you do this,” he said.  “We have to find another way.”

                   “That will take time.  I can’t risk Varric’s life.  I need to do this.  Not only to save him, but for me.  I need to face him.”  In the time it had taken for Cullen to read the note, a firm resolve had come over Evelyn.  It was one thing to Hugh to do what he did to her.  But to take people she loved and try to use them against her?  For once, she had the advantage on her side.  She had learned to fight back, training with the best the Inquisition had to offer.  She had learned tactical fighting, espionage and diplomacy from the best as well.  She had the love and support of her friends and her husband, and she was not going to shrink away from this.  “He may want me alone and unarmed, but he doesn’t realize I’m always armed,” she said as she held up her anchor.  “I’ll take Cole and ride Brutus.  He won’t see a horse as a threat, I hope, and Cole can stay hidden and make him forget.” She looked at Cullen.  “I know you are not happy with this.  I’m sorry.  I see no other way.”

                   Cullen nodded.  “You’re right, I’m not happy about it, but I’m not angry.  I understand. I will give you two hours, and then I am coming after you.  Do you have your dagger on you?”  Cullen had persuaded Evelyn to always keep one hidden on her as her armor did not fit her at the moment, and wearing a pair of daggers on her back at all times made it a little hard to do her Inquisitor duties in Skyhold.   It had come in handy a few times, most notably against her perverted Brother-in-Law and his clumsy advances.  She couldn’t wear her regular pair of daggers as they were fairly obvious, but she felt almost naked leaving Skyhold without them.  She opted to hide them in a blanket roll tied to Brutus’ saddle, just in case.

                      Cole appeared at her side, ready to go, startling a few people around them who never seemed to get used to his comings and goings.  Cullen took her hands.  “Remember, he is most likely very clever, and he has had years to perfect his techniques, but he will be arrogant.  And arrogance blinds as you well know.  He will be focused on you, so Cole, stay in the peripheral- watch, read and try to stay near Varric if you can.  These “potions” he made you drink- I have a feeling that he was perfecting different poisons.  I’ll have Healer on standby, just in case, but keep an eye out for any bottles and possible antidotes.  You know what to do.  I have faith.”  Cullen took Evelyn into his arms and held her close, kissing her hard before letting her go and helping her up on Brutus. 

                   He watched the road as Evelyn and Cole left.  He felt almost as helpless as he had the night Evelyn went to Corypheus, but like then, he had seen the resolve in her eyes, and he knew that he had to let her do as she was destined.  Unlike Corypheus, where she had the whole world to fight for, this time, she was fighting for herself.  And Maker help him, he had to let her go again.  He turned and headed to the War Room to talk to everyone, and then wait.

                   Evelyn approached the little cave warily, Cole not in her line of sight.  She couldn’t afford to look weak right now and give him the advantage, but she also couldn’t charge right in and leave herself open.   As she approached the entrance, she saw Hugh poking at a fire in the middle of the cave.  Varric was tied up and lying along the side of the cave.  She didn’t see any injuries on him, and she could feel his eyes on her, trying to tell her something.  Hugh looked up and grinned broadly, standing up.

                   “My little Mouse.  I’m glad to see you still follow instructions! And look at you.  All grown up!  And full with child.  My my….”  He walked up to her and caressed her cheek.  She grabbed his hand and pushed it away from her.  “Now little Mouse, don’t get feisty.  Remember what happens when you get feisty?” he wheedled, trying to be coy.

                   “Cut the crap, Hugh.  I’m not that little girl anymore.  State your business.” Evelyn said tersely, her eyes on Varric.  “What did you do to him?”

                   Hugh waved a hand negligently.  “He’s fine, as long as you behave.” Evelyn raised an eyebrow and impatiently indicated for him to continue.  He huffed.  “Fine, I’ve dosed him with a slow-acting poison of my own design.  You stay with me, and you behave, I let him go with the antidote.  I may even let him watch if he likes.”

                   “How do I know there’s an antidote?” Evelyn asked.  “How do I know you won’t just let him die?”  Hugh pulled a vial out of his robe, showing it to her.  “So I’m supposed to go on faith?  That could pickle juice in there for all I know.”  She looked at Varric again and noticed he was getting paler. 

                   Hugh took advantage of her brief distraction and grabbed her in his arms, pushing her against the cave wall, running his tongue along her neck.  Moaning as he rubbed against her “I’ve been wanting you for so long.  Since I first saw you all those years ago.  To think, if I had had my way all those years ago, I would have deflowered the Inquisitor.”  In his excitement, Hugh didn’t notice Evelyn remove the vial from his pocket and throw it to Cole.  Hugh continued his assault on Evelyn, so focused on her that he didn’t notice Cole give Varric the antidote, loosen his bonds and watch him quietly.  As disgusted as she was, Evelyn had to keep him distracted until she knew Varric was all right.  Hugh was still strong, and Evelyn didn’t know if she was going to be able to hold him off much longer. 

                   Suddenly, Hugh grabbed Evelyn by the arms and pulled her over to the furs he had laid out and threw her roughly down making Evelyn cry out in pain as she hit her head.  As Hugh climbed roughly on top of her, Varric stirred, “HEY!  Let her go.  She’s having a baby for Maker’s sake.  You’re going to hurt her…” Hugh stopped what he was doing and looked up. 

                   “You shouldn’t be speaking.”  He got up and walked over to Varric looking at him carefully. “How did he get the antidote?” he said, feeling around in his robes and realizing the vial was gone.  He rushed back over to Evelyn, who was slowly sitting up holding her head and kicked her in the stomach.  Evelyn screamed at the pain as Hugh rounded up to kick her again.  He was stopped by two daggers being plunged into his back by Cole.  He fell to the ground as Varric managed to remove his bonds and stand up shakily, wobbling over to the other cave wall to support himself.  Hugh tried to crawl over to his potions, but Cole materialized in front of them, blocking his way.  Evelyn sat up, forcing herself to get up in spite of the pain.  She walked over to Hugh and put her boot on his neck, pushing him to the floor. 

                   “Is he cured?” she asked him.  Hugh refused to answer.  Her boot clamped down more, threatening to snap his neck. “Answer me,” she spat.  “Pathetic little man.  Do you think I’d give you my body that easily- by threatening my friend?  Do you think I’m not going to do everything I can?  Did you not anticipate that I may have methods at my disposal that you’ve never dreamed of?  Tell me now if I need to dose Varric with anything more, or I will make you hurt so badly, you will beg to die.”

                   Hugh struggled to get up, only to find Evelyn’s dagger at his ear.  Her anchor flared, along with her eyes and she slowly drew her dagger alongside his earlobe, drawing a thin line of blood.  “I will send you into the fade, alive, for the demons to find if you don’t talk.  Don’t think I won’t.” 

                   Hugh let out a thin scream.  “Elfroot….elfroot and blood lotus in equal measures.  I swear to you.  Please…let me goooo” he screamed. 

                   “Cole?”  Evelyn asked as she watched Hugh beg and scream.  “Is he telling the truth?”

                   Cole looked at him.  “Yes.  And he knows more.”  Evelyn looked at Cole, who was looking at the potion bottles and the book that was lying there. “It’s all in there.”

                   “Please, let me live and I’ll share everything I know,” Hugh begged.  Evelyn looked down at him again.  This man had caused her so much pain.  The sickness, the beatings, the abuse.  Was it worth letting him live?   The pain in her stomach was beginning to make her feel dizzy- this couldn’t be good, but she had to finish it. 

                   Cole knelt down by Hugh, watching him, and then looked at Evelyn.  “It’s all in the book.  We have no need of him.  There is no help for him.”  Evelyn had never heard Cole give up on someone, never heard him tell her there was no help.  How many other people, girls like her had he hurt over the years? If she let him live, how many more would she be responsible for?  “He’s hurt so many.  Poisoning.  Killing.  Raping.”  Cole backed away from Hugh in shock at what was happening in his mind.  The things he wanted to do to Evelyn, if only she would let him go. 

                   Evelyn looked at Cole.  “There is help for him Cole.  Remember that first day at Skyhold? The dying soldier.  Do you agree?”  Cole looked at Hugh again, reading, watching…and nodded.  “In that case, Hugh, in the name of all of those you have wounded, killed and ruined, I send you to the Maker.  May he have mercy on your soul because I have none.”  She stepped hard on his neck, snapping it and killing him instantly.  She stepped away from him, looking at him, feeling her temper rise- and screaming, she plunged her dagger into his head for good measure.  She felt someone take her hand and looked over to see Cole. 

                   “Cole, my stomach hurts.”  She staggered as Cole tried to help her down.  He pulled her as far away from Hugh’s body as he could.  “Leave me,” she gasped.  Go through those bottles and try to find what we need to help Varric.  And get that book.”  Varric had fallen to his knees, heaving and was unable to get up.  Cole looked through the bottles but couldn’t find what was needed. Evelyn knew they were nowhere near water, so there would be no blood lotus nearby.  “Get…get him outside,” she said as she started to crawl to the entrance.  “We’ll get the rest of the supplies later.”  Cole brought the book to Evelyn and went to help Varric outside.  He came back in for Evelyn and help her outside, laying her near Varric.   “Cole, can you..can you hear the baby?” she asked in a panic.  “Is she all right?” 

                   Cole put his hands on her stomach.  “For now.  She’s hurting.  If you don’t get help, she could get worse.”

                   “Oh, Maker.  Cole.  Go get help.  Please.”  Evelyn begged him.  “I can’t ride back.  I’m scared.”  She crawled over to check on Varric, who was losing consciousness again.  “Cole- go get help.  Brutus will protect us.”

                   Cole disappeared.  Evelyn tried to remain calm.  She had run out so fast, she hadn’t even considered the danger to the baby.  What kind of mamae was she going to be if she couldn’t even protect her child while she was in the womb?  She tried to lay still, willing the pain to subside, and praying to the Maker to help her as she caressed her belly, talking to her baby.  She talked about her childhood, promising her daughter that she would love her no matter what, and she would always protect her. She told stories and sang to her until she slipped into unconsciousness.

                   A while later, Cullen and Dorian came galloping up, practically scrambling down before the horses had stopped.  Dorian looked at Varric over, making sure he was still breathing before opening a bottle and forcing the liquid down his throat.  He heard Varric cough and watched his eyes flutter open.  “Varric.  How do you feel?” 

                   Varric groaned.  “Pretty crappy Sparkler.  Check on her- she needs help.”  Dorian looked over at Evelyn, who was still unconscious.  Cullen was by her side checking her over, looking frantic.  Cole appeared next to him and put his hands on her stomach again. Dorian came over and waited for Cole to speak. 

                   “The baby is hurting.”  Cullen blanched.  Dorian ran a healing light over Evelyn, concentrating on her belly, hoping it would help. He looked at Cole again to see if there was an improvement.  After a moment, Cole nodded. “Better.”    Cullen picked her up and brought her over to the wagon they had brought, laying her gently in the back.  A few minutes later, Varric joined her in the wagon.  Before they left, Cullen and Dorian went into the cave to look around.  They found Hugh’s body- Cullen stood looking at it silently, noting the broken neck and the dagger sticking out of his skull.  Dorian looked over the vials and other items around the cave and gathered them up to take them along.  He found more books tucked in a box and took those as well- remembering the book he saw clutched in Evelyn’s hand.

                   They made their way back to Skyhold as quickly as possible.  As they arrived, the healers took over and hustled Evelyn and Varric inside to be taken care of.  Cullen sat with his head in his hands waiting for news.  He shouldn’t have sent her.  He knew that there was no way he could have stopped her as soon as they knew that Varric was in danger, but he didn’t know what would happen if they lost the baby.  They’d each blame themselves, and maybe each other- would they fall apart?  Cullen prayed to the Maker that the baby would survive, promising that no matter what happened, he would not leave Evelyn’s side again if it was needed.

                   He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see Healer smiling at him.  She sat down next to him and patted his knee reassuringly.  “The babe is fine Commander.  She has the will to survive, that one,” she said.  “The Inquisitor is not doing well.  She is going to be on bedrest for a while.  Her blood pressure is through the roof, and I want to make sure that baby stays where she’s supposed to for now.”

                   “Can I see her?” Cullen asked.  Healer nodded and Cullen rushed to Evelyn’s bedside.  She was lying on her side, hand caressing her belly.  She looked at Cullen, fear, and despair in her eyes.  He knelt down next to the bed and took her hands in his.  “Evie…”

                   “I almost got her killed,” she cried.  “Cullen, I could have killed our baby.  I’m so sorry,“ she sobbed.  Cullen sat her up so he could sit behind her and cradle her.  He put his arms around her and held her close. He wasn’t sure what to say.  What had happened was not all right, but he hadn’t stopped her either.  He felt as responsible as she did.  He should have stopped her from going- he should have done more, but to have stopped her could have killed Varric.  Would he have felt right with that?  He knew Evelyn wouldn’t have- she would never have forgiven herself, and she would never have forgiven him if he had stopped her.  Cullen shushed her as she sobbed against him. He held her for a long time until she fell back to sleep and then dozed with her as she slept. 

                   When they woke up, Healer bustled over to check Evelyn over.  “Inquisitor, you had a close call that taught you a lesson I think, but you need to be more careful from now on.  You can walk up to your room, but that is it for now. Strict bedrest for the time being until your blood pressure improves.  I’ll check you often and I will know if you are not obeying my orders,” she said with mock severity. She patted Evelyn’s knee reassuringly.  “That little girl is a fighter, just like her mother and father.  She will be fine.”

 


	41. Chapter Forty-One

Chapter Forty-One

                   A little while later, Cullen and Evelyn slowly walked up to their room.  Evelyn wasn’t tired, but following Healer’s orders, she got into bed and silently rolled over to her side.  Cullen sat at the edge of the bed, watching Evelyn turn away from him.  “Evie, don’t turn away from me, please.  Let’s talk.  I don’t want silence to come between us.”

                   Evelyn didn’t turn around, but she spoke.  “Are you angry at me?”

                   Cullen leaned over and put his hand on her leg. “No Evie.  I’m not angry.  What happened was out of our control and you were forced to make an impossible choice.  Varric is our friend, and he needed help.  You needed to face your abuser.  If we had let him go, no telling how many more people would have been hurt.”

                   Evelyn turned to face him.  “What if I had lost the baby?” she asked.

                   Cullen was silent for a moment.  “I don’t think we can afford to ask that question in this situation.  Some things have to be left in the Maker’s hands.  Once, I had to send you to Corypheus, not knowing if you would come back.  I had to trust that you would fight and that you would come back to me.  This time, I had to trust again and I did.  You had the foresight to take Cole with you, and he saved you and Varric and the baby.  We can’t drive ourselves crazy over the what-ifs?  We can only move on from here and not let ourselves get into that situation again.”

                   Evelyn lay quietly for a while.  “When I was waiting for you outside that cave, I was so angry at myself.  I sang to the baby and told her stories, promising to be a better mamae to her.  How do I promise that?  What if I have to keep fighting for the rest of my life?  There’s always going to be something happening somewhere.  Someone wanting to have a go at the Inquisitor, or at you.  She’ll always be in danger because of us.”

                   Cullen lay down on the other side of the bed facing his wife.  “We’ll protect her, and each other.  Danger is all around everyone- we can’t live in fear.  We have plenty of people here to help, and when we finally get to move to South Reach, we’ll have a whole sanctuary of former Templars.  We will always protect each other. Focus on that.”

                   Evelyn caressed Cullen’s cheek and then jumped as the baby kicked.  She grabbed Cullen’s hand and brought it to her belly, just in time for another kick.  “It’s the first since Hugh kicked me,” she said in relief.  She sobered up for a moment as Hugh entered her mind again.  “I…killed him.  I stepped on his neck and killed him.”

                   “I know.  Varric told me.  Don’t think on it love.  I know how you feel about killing for revenge, but you probably saved lives, and you avenged more than just yourself.  Think of all the girls like you who never got that chance.”  Evelyn sighed and nodded.  “I know you need some time to process everything.  Just know that I am here and I love you more than anything. Let me take care of the both of you.  We’ll get you calmed down so you don’t have to stay in bed all the time, and you are taking some time off.  No more meetings, no more war room.”

                   Cullen had been thinking about it for a while.  As long as he had known Evelyn, she rarely carved out time for herself.  She had hit the ground running after she had awoken at Haven and had kept going until Corypheus had been finished.  Yes, she had taken a few stolen moments here and there- taking the trip to the lake with him, games of Wicked Grace with her friends, and an occasional quiet evening with Dorian.  Even after Corypheus, she had been on the go.  Helping plan the wedding, spending time with both of their families, war room conversations about red lyrium and negotiating the role of the Inquisition in the future.  She needed to take some time for herself. 

                   When he expressed this to Evelyn, she took his hand.  “But what about you love?  I can easily say the same thing about you.  You have worked non-stop yourself, and have probably taken even less time for you than I have.”

                   They were both quiet for a while.  “I can turn more duties over to Warrick if he’ll agree,” Cullen said. “Ser Barris and Devlin when they are around as well.  I want to be around to help you- I can’t leave it to servants.  We have so many good people around us.”  Cullen kissed her and got up.  “I need to start making some arrangements then.  You get some rest, and I’ll be back soon.”

                   An hour later, Cullen had gathered all of the necessary people in the War room.  Josephine, Leliana, Iron Bull, Dorian, Sera, Cole, Warrick, Ser Barris, Dagna, Scout Harding and Devlin were all there.  Cullen gave them a brief update on Evelyn.  “She’s been put on bedrest for the time being. She…we both need some time to focus on our family.”

                   Leliana spoke up first.  “Of course Commander.  You both deserve to have some time.”  They spent some time making arrangements for troop training and the lyrium cleanup.  Cullen promised they would both be available if it was needed, but as a last resort- especially Evelyn.  “The faster she is able to get out of bed, the better she will be- but she needs to be kept calm.  I really want her up and about as soon as possible.”  

                   As they were finishing making arrangements, Cole looked up.  “You need to get back upstairs.  Right now.”  Ignoring the panicked looks, Cullen ran for the door. 

                   He could hear her crying as he came up the stairs. Cole was already there, trying to soothe her as Cullen approached the bed.  The books that had been taken from the cave were laying on the bed except the one Evelyn held in her hand.  Cullen took the book from her hand and looked at it.  Evelyn looked at him, breath hitching as she tried to form the words.  “They’re…they’re not just notes on his poisons.  They’re journals.  Everything he did.  He’s been writing them for years.  I…I’m in there. Oh, Maker.  All those people.”  She screamed as she hid her head in her hands.  Cullen took her in his arms and looked to Cole.  “Get Dorian.  And Healer.  Please.”  He held her and rocked her as she screamed and cried, trying desperately to calm her.  “Shhh…Evie.  It’s all right.”  He held her that way until Healer came up the steps.  “I can’t get her to calm down,” he told Healer.  In the times that Evelyn had been upset, he had never seen her quite like this.  He had always been able to calm her before, but not this time.  Healer pulled a bottle out of her pocket and poured a measure of liquid into the cup by Evelyn’s bed.  She gave the cup to Cullen who slowly convinced Evelyn to drink, holding her as the sedative took hold.  When Evelyn had fallen asleep, Cullen laid her back on the bed and gathered up the books while Healer felt her pulse and checked her over.

                   “Commander, everything is still fine, but she needs to be kept calm.  I don’t know what set her off, but it needs to be taken care of.  Something that makes her that hysterical is dangerous.”

                   Cullen nodded.  “I know.  I’m not sure what to do about it, though.  I’m hoping that she will be calmed down about it after she wakes up.”  Maker, what a mess.

                   As he spoke, Dorian came up the stairs, fear in his eyes.  “What’s happened?  Is she all right?”  He looked at Evelyn anxiously, noting her swollen eyes and her still hitching breath.

                   Cullen pointed to the books.  “Those happened.  The books we took from the cave.  They were his journals.  She started reading one thinking she’d be looking at poison and antidote recipes and found…well, I don’t know what she found, but it set her off.  She was screaming when I came up here.  Healer has given her a sedative for now.”

                   Dorian took the books and looked over at Evelyn.  She was going to be sleeping for a while, so he sat down and after putting the books in order by date, began to read.  The journals were written in a small, tight hand and Dorian knew it would take some time to get through them.  Just reading the first few pages made him second guess whether or not he wanted to read them all.  After an hour, he put the book down and stood up.  Cullen looked up at him questioningly.  “I had to put it down for a while- the script is so small it hurts my eyes.  Vishante Kaffas, that man was twisted.  I’m not a quarter through the first book yet and I want to vomit.”

                   “She said she was in it,” Cullen said quietly.  “Did you…”

                   “Nothing yet,” Dorian replied.  “These journals go back a bit before he met her.”  He looked at Evelyn again.  “From what I’ve read, she was very very fortunate.  If the servants hadn’t started watching, she’d probably be dead.  He had already started killing before he met her.”

                   “What about the potions?” Cullen asked.  “The ones he forced her to drink?”

                   “No mention yet.  I’m sure those are coming up.  I’ll take these and read them over if I can manage it.  The old library downstairs has a magnifier- that should help.  I’ll let you know what I find.  If there is anything useful, I’ll scribe the information and give it to Dagna or Healer.  They don’t need to be reading this.”  He grabbed the books and went downstairs with them, not wanting Evelyn to see them again if she woke up.

                   Cullen stayed with her as she slept, sometimes reading, sometimes just watching her.  Maker, she’d been through so much- when was she going to have some peace?  His heart ached for her.  He had hoped that after they got married, that things would settle down a little and she would be able to enjoy married life and being pregnant, and later, enjoy her family.  It just seemed like something always got in the way of her happiness.  He had a thought, but he would have to work on it later when he could get someone to stay with her for a while.  For now, he would stay and watch.

                   A few hours later, Evelyn awoke and sat up, looking around confused.  Cullen stood up and came to sit by her on the bed as she got her bearings.  “How long was I asleep?” she asked him.

                   “A while, I’m not sure.  What do you remember?” he asked tentatively.

                   Evelyn thought about it for a while before the tears sprang into her eyes.  “Oh, Maker- those books.  Where are they?”  Cullen pulled her into his arms before she could start to panic. 

                   “Dorian has them.  I can’t let you read them, Evie. They aren’t good for your health.  I know you read horrible things love.  I can’t ask you to forget what you read, so you tell me what you need to help you through this.  Your blood pressure is too high- I can’t have you upset.”     

                   Evelyn pulled away from Cullen and sat back on the bed.  “I don’t know Cullen.  What I read was horrifying.  I know it wasn’t my fault, but it still haunts me.  Even if I wanted to, I know I can’t read more.  It would probably kill me.  I just need some time to sort through this and I need to remember that I finally stopped him.”

                   “Yes, you did.  And quite impressively too.  Who taught you to snap a neck like that? And the dagger to the skull?  That took some strength.”

                   “Krem taught me actually- the neck part anyway.  The dagger- that was just pure rage.”  Evelyn gave him a rundown of what happened in the cave.  “Sometimes, I think the Maker put all of my companions in my path for a reason.  All of them have taught me something that has saved my life at one time or another.  Sera taught me how to pick pockets- I would never have gotten that vial out of his robes otherwise.”  Evelyn sat up straight. “Andraste preserve me- Varric!  Where’s Varric?”

                   “He’s still at Healer’s.  Cole told Dorian what to bring before we rode out to get you. Luckily, we had plenty of blood lotus around- we were able to dose Varric right away.  He’s taking a while to recover, but he’ll be fine.”  Evelyn breathed a sigh of relief. “As soon as he’s able, I’m sure he’ll be up to see you.”

                   Cullen pushed Evelyn back onto the bed.  “I have other news.  As of a few hours ago, you and I are on vacation.  No war table, no meetings, no training.  Warrick, Ser Barris, and Devlin are going to arrange the recruit training and Dorian and Dagna are going to handle the lyrium research with the soldiers that were going to Kirkwall with Varric.  We have two groups that are going to handle the field.  Bull, Sera, Dorian, and Warrick, along with the Chargers, and Ser Barris, Cole, Devlin and one of the mages are the other team.  The mage, an elf named Lysas, says he’s talked to you.”

                   Evelyn lit up in recognition.  “Yes, I spoke with him outside the Gull and Lantern when we went to Redcliffe to talk to Fiona. He seemed a decent sort.”

                   “Anyway,” Cullen continued, “They will keep us in the loop, and will include us if any major decisions need to be made.  I have to admit that I will probably still help with training- I don’t want to go soft, but my first priority from now on is you and the baby.” 

                   Evelyn smiled. 

 


	42. Chapter Forty-Two

Chapter Forty-Two

                   The next morning found Cullen raiding the kitchen for fried eggs with grape jelly.  Judging from the look the cook gave him, he had a feeling that he was going to be down here a lot for the next few months.  While he was waiting, he chatted with one of the maids, telling her of his idea to help Evelyn with her bedrest.  This particular maid, Daria, was a bright, happy girl- just what was needed.  She also had special knowledge of what Cullen was after and promised to deliver later that morning as soon as she could. 

                   Cullen arrived upstairs with Evelyn’s breakfast tray to find her chatting with Varric.  He had pulled a chair over next to the bed and was talking with Evelyn as she held his hands.  “Well, Curly looks like you’re stuck with me for a little while longer.  After everything that’s happened, I have to stay and see the baby.”  He wrinkled his nose as Cullen put the tray in front of Evelyn.  “Although, I don’t think I’ll be visiting much if you’re going to be eating stuff like that.”  Evelyn giggled and dug in.  Cullen shook his head and hoped that the grape jelly supply would last. 

                   Since Varric had brought a deck of cards with him, Cullen assumed he was planning on visiting for a while, so he headed downstairs to get some breakfast of his own.  When he got to the Main hall, he saw Dorian sitting with Bull, pale and shaken.  He sat down across from them, waiting to hear what Dorian had to say.  “I read those books through the night.  Fasta Vass, I don’t think I’ll ever be the same again.”  He refused to say what was in the books but told Cullen that he had copied down the parts that were important and would give them to Dagna when he got a moment and then he was going to burn those books.  After finishing some breakfast, Dorian went off to get some sleep, Iron Bull fussing after him.

                   A few hours later, Cullen came back up to find Evelyn and Varric arguing good-naturedly over a hand of cards.  Evelyn looked over at him- she could tell when Cullen was up to something.  “Cullen, what’s in your pocket?” 

                   Cullen feigned disinterest, “Oh…nothing.  I’m just happy to see you is all.”  Evelyn looked at him with eyebrows raised, but since he wasn’t talking, went back to arguing with Varric. 

                   “Varric, my blind uncle could even see that you were tucking a card away behind my belly where you think I couldn’t see…what was that noise?”  Evelyn had heard a strange noise in the room and looked around.  Dismissing it, she looked at Varric again, “Seriously Varric- you’re going to cheat a pregnant lad…ok, I heard it again. What is that?”  She looked over at Cullen, who was polishing his armor by the dresser.  “Cullen, I swear I just saw your pocket move.”

                   “Don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said as he kept polishing, ignoring the high-pitched mews that were coming from his pocket.

                   “Cullen, get your butt over here.”  Grinning, Cullen sauntered over, standing just out of her reach. 

                   “Did you need something?” he teased.  She made a grab for him, but he was too far away. 

                   “Cullen, don’t fuck with the pregnant lady.  Now get over here.”  Cullen laughed and came and sat next to her on the bed.  She poked at the moving pocket and jumped back when it twitched and made that sound again.  Gingerly, she reached inside and pulled out a kitten.

                   “KITTY” she squealed as she hugged the tiny orange kitten to her.  Cullen chuckled. “Can I keep him?” she asked him. 

                   “That’s why I brought him,” he replied.  Evelyn squealed even louder and kissed him.  As she petted the kitten, a girl came up the stairs to her room with a box.  “Evie, this is Daria, the procurer of the kitten.  I’ve arranged for her to work up here from now on, and she’ll help you with your new pet. 

                   Varric chuckled.  “This is where I came in,” he said.  “The last guy I knew that had a cat blew up the Chantry in Kirkwall.”  He stood up and kissed Evelyn on the top of the head.  “I’ll catch you later Lady.”

                   Evelyn watched Daria busying herself with setting up a box in the corner for the cat.  “What’s that for?” Evelyn asked.  Daria explained the litter box and food and water bowls and what to do with them.  “I’ll be taking care of those as well as general room cleaning, your Worship,” explained Daria cheerfully.  “I also brought these,” she set an assortment of toys on the bed- showing her how the kitten would play with them.  Evelyn was delighted and grabbed the frothy piece of cloth on the string and wand and watched the kitten jumping and rolling around trying to catch it.  Even Cullen was laughing after a while.  He watched Evelyn laugh delightedly at her new little pet, who already seemed to be showing signs of adoring his new mistress.  Watching her laughing and happy made him worry a little less. She had a nightmare the night before, a bad one.  He knew that she was in for more bad nights- between everything she had been through, and the pregnancy hormones, the nightmares were inevitable.  Anything he could do to make her smile was worth it.

                   He came and sat down next to her on the bed, smiling as she put her arm around him.  “So what are you going to name him?”  he asked her, nodding his head at the kitten.

                   Evelyn held the kitten up and looked at him.  “PeeWee.” Cullen looked at her.  “What?  It’s cute,” she said.  She cuddled the kitten as it dozed off on her.  “Thank you, Cullen,” she said, looking up at him. “I always wanted a pet.”

                   Hours later, Bull walked into his room to find Dorian sitting with his head in his hands.  “Kadan, what’s going on?” he asked, coming to sit by him. “I thought you were sleeping.  You were up pretty late last night.”

                   “I don’t know how I’m going to face her again,” Dorian said.  Bull waited for him to continue.  “Those books I read, they belonged to a former tutor of Evelyns.  One who abused her and beat her badly when she was a child.  Long story short, this man kidnapped Varric a few days ago and demanded Evelyn meet him alone and unarmed.  It’s the reason she’s on bedrest.  No one aside from myself, Cullen and Dorian ever knew about it. 

                   “Where’s the asshole now?” Bull growled. 

                   “Dead.  She snapped his neck like Krem taught her.”  Bull grunted his approval.  “We looted the cave and found his journals.  Evelyn made the mistake of reading one yesterday while we were meeting at the war table- that was when Cole freaked out and Cullen went running.  She thought they were recipe books.  They weren’t.  They were detailed accounts of his crimes against other girls like Evelyn and their families.  The little bit she read upset her so badly, she had to be sedated.  I read them last night.  He was obsessed with her- she was the one who got away.  The journals talked about all the things he wanted to do to her, and about what he had done to her.  I don’t know how much she read, but after I finished those journals, I either wanted to run upstairs and hold her and go out and find the man, raise him and then kill him again.  That dear girl.  How do I face her after having read that?”

                   “Well Kadan, I think things would be worse if you avoided her- don’t you think?  She needs you.  Go to her tomorrow.  You’ll be fine.”  He took Dorian’s hand in his. “Come on, I’ll tire you out so you can get some sleep.”

                   The next morning, Dorian came up the stairs to see Evelyn, only to find her sleeping- dark circles under her eyes, curled up next to Cullen, who was sitting up reading.  He looked up and nodded at Dorian.  Gently getting out of bed as not to disturb Evelyn, he came over to see Dorian.

                   “I just came to check on her,” Dorian said quietly.  “She doesn’t look good.”

                   Cullen turned to look at her.  “Bad night.  She had several nightmares.”  He sighed.  “All I can do is soothe her when she wakes.  I can’t prevent the dreams.” 

                   Dorian nodded.  “I know what you mean.  Why don’t you go get something to eat and get something for Evelyn.  I’ll stay with her,” he offered, “Just tell me one thing.”  He pointed at the orange kitten snuggled up on Evelyn’s side.  “What exactly is that?”

                   “That’s…um…PeeWee. Her kitten.”  Dorian leveled his gaze at him.  “What? You should have heard her squeal when I gave him to her yesterday.  They already adore each other.”

                   Dorian pushed Cullen along and went to sit nearby, grabbing a book to read, as Cullen headed down the stairs.  Dorian sat looking at Evelyn as she slept.  He couldn’t shake what he had read about her in those journals.  He felt a tear trickle down his cheek as he watched her.  That man had such plans for her, it killed him to even think of it again.  He shook his head, wiping his tear away.  He had to stop.  The man was dead, the books had been burned.  No one ever had to know. 

                   He saw Evelyn twitching in her sleep out of the side of his eye, catching his attention from his book.  He watched her with concern, unsure if he should wake her up or not.  She looked so tired, but if she wasn’t resting well, it wouldn’t help her. In disbelief he watched as PeeWee got up and walked up towards Evelyn’s head, watching her as she grew restless.  As little as he was, he butted his head into her and made his little mewing sound, nestling in near her neck.  She actually calmed down and stayed asleep, looking a little more relaxed.  He stared at the kitten in amazement as Cullen came up the stairs with a tray.  He noticed Dorian standing staring slack-jawed at the bed and put the tray down in concern.  When Dorian told him what he saw, he stared too.  The kitten was curled up under Evelyn’s chin, a tiny paw resting on her as they both slept.  Cullen didn’t know anything about cats- he’d have to ask Daria about it when he saw her next. 

                   “I was wondering what possessed you to get her a cat, but I guess it was a good choice,” Dorian said. 

                   “Personally, I thought it was adorable to see the Herald of Andraste, slayer of dragons and destroyer of ancient magisters turn into a screaming ten-year-old over it.”  He looked lovingly at her as she slept.  “I just want everything for her.  A healthy baby, a happy life.”         

                   “You’re well on your way Cullen,” Dorian said.  “You both deserve it.  So tell me, how are you going to spend this ‘vacation’ of yours?”

                   “Not sure yet.  It depends on how long she’s on bedrest.  For now, I’ll just make sure she’s taken care of.  Maker, I still have a hard time believing I’m going to be a father…” he said, shaking his head.  Dorian laughed. 

                   Throughout the day, Evelyn had a number of visitors keeping her company, and PeeWee entertained them all.  Even Healer had to smile when she came up to check on Evelyn.  She took Evelyn’s pulse and patted her on the hand.  “Give me a few more days dearie, and we’ll see about letting you get out of bed,” she said.  “Until then, you stay right where you are.”  Evelyn nodded.  She wasn’t wild about bedrest, but she remembered the pain she had been in, and the occasional twinges she was still having and knew she had to listen.

                   As Healer flitted about, Cullen came up the stairs after his sparring session- shirtless and sweating.  Evelyn glanced over at him and biting her lip, asked Healer, “Can we…you know?”  Healer looked over at Cullen, nodded appreciatively and assured her that she could but not to go overboard.  That would be hard- especially when he came upstairs looking like that.          

                   After Healer left, Evelyn snuggled her kitten and waited for Cullen to come out of the bath.  She thought about the last few days- Varric being kidnapped and her confrontation with Hugh.  The little bit of the book that she had read haunted her still.  The kitten and the bevy of visitors helped distract her, but in the quiet times, she found her thoughts returning.  She knew Cullen was right- she should not read any more of it, especially now, but someone had to. 

                   Cullen came out from the bath and saw Evelyn laying on the bed thinking long thoughts.  “Cullen, what happened to those books?” she asked.  He hesitated, wondering if she would be angry at his answer.

                   “I gave them to Dorian.  I know he read through them and scribed the important parts.  After that, he burned them.  He said no one should ever get their hands on them.”

                   Evelyn thought about it for a minute and nodded. “I can understand that.  How is Dorian?  I haven’t seen him all day.”

                   “He was up here before, but you were sleeping.  He didn’t want to wake you- you had just gotten to sleep after a bad night.  I won’t lie- I saw him yesterday and he didn’t look good. The books affected him badly.  He was up here long enough to see something interesting, though.”  Evelyn looked at him concerned.  “He told me that while he was sitting with you, you started twitching in your sleep like you were having a nightmare.  PeeWee woke up and walked up and butted you on the head and then snuggled in near your neck and you calmed down.  Do you remember anything?”

                   Evelyn thought about it and shook her head.  “I don’t think so.”  She stroked PeeWee and looked at him.  “That’s interesting all right.”

                   Cullen came to lay on the bed next to Evelyn so she could curl up on him.  He stroked her belly, which was getting larger.  He knew she was a little sensitive about it- she wasn’t used to inactivity and even though she hadn’t gained much weight, she didn’t like it when people told her how big she was getting- and she still had two months to go.  He loved seeing her like this- growing ripe with his baby. He had overheard her asking Healer about whether or not they could have sex and was happy to hear that it was all right.  He nuzzled her neck as his hands roamed her body.  As much as she loved him, and couldn’t keep her hands off of him, she had felt a little reserved lately when he touched her.  Cullen could sense her hesitation and asked her what was wrong.  She looked away from him.  “I just don’t feel very sexy.”

                   Cullen sat up and looked at her.  “Are you kidding me?” he asked disbelievingly.  “It’s all I could do all day to tell people to leave so I could have you to myself.”  He leaned down and kissed her belly.  “I think you are gorgeous,” he said as his lips continued to kiss her in other places. Evelyn smiled- Cullen always knew the right thing to say to make her feel desired-and reached over to put PeeWee on his little bed.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have to say that the inspiration for PeeWee was the first cat I adopted from the Humane Society before my husband and I got married. He was a large orange cat and he was super smart. We had him for about six years before he died of a liver ailment. Best cat we ever owned and I still miss him.


	43. Chapter Forty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm actually starting to catch up to where I am currently- I'm a little blocked at the moment and have some stuff coming up that may keep me from updating, but I will do my best.

Chapter Forty-Three

                   A few days later, Healer cleared Evelyn to get out of bed, but warned her not to overdo it.  It became a funny sight to see Evelyn walking around with PeeWee on her shoulder or in her arms, his little mouth opening in a loud “mew” at people as if seeking everyone’s attention.  Evelyn still spent some time speaking with Mother Giselle if she started to feel distressed, which helped her a lot.  Her nightmares were decreasing thanks to Cullen and PeeWee, so she was resting better and her appetite had improved as well. 

                   As Evelyn was walking to the stables, she saw the gates to Skyhold open to admit a woman who appeared to be hunched over in pain.  She was alone, and obviously injured, and obviously pregnant.  Evelyn approached her warily.  “Ma’am, are you all right?”, struggling as the woman nearly fell into her arms.  “Help me!” Evelyn shouted as she tried to support the woman, who was bleeding and losing consciousness.  Ser Barris happened to be walking by and rushed over to pick the woman up and take her to Healer.  Evelyn followed behind and entered Healer’s room as Ser Barris laid her down on a cot.  Studying the woman closely, she could see she was not as far along as Evelyn was, maybe around five months.  She hoped that whatever was wrong wouldn’t cause her to lose the baby.  Healer put the privacy screens up around her and got to work.

                   An hour later, Healer let her in and told her what she found.  The woman was probably about Cullen’s age, around five months pregnant and had obviously been through a lot.  Healer thought the baby was fine but wasn’t completely sure- Evelyn decided to find Cole later to see if he could see anything.  The woman was still unconscious, and Healer had cleaned all of her injuries and tried to make her comfortable.  Evelyn went inside to sit with her as she slept, petting PeeWee and conversing as she waited. A couple of hours later, the woman awoke, starting as she did so, panicking because she didn’t remember where she was.

                   “Rest easy,” Evelyn said, “You are at Skyhold and you are safe.”

                   “My…my soldiers…where are my soldiers?” she asked, confused.

                   “You came in by yourself,” Evelyn replied.  “Can you tell me what happened?”

                   The woman was about to speak when Cullen entered. “Evelyn, is everything all right?  I overheard that you were at Healer’s and was concerned…” he stopped short and looked closer at the woman lying on the bed.  “Maker’s Breath, it’s Queen Elissa.”

                   Evelyn turned and stared.  She had never met the Hero of Fereldan, but she knew from Alistair that she had been out searching for a cure for the Calling. 

                   “Cullen…Cullen Rutherford?  Is that really you?” Elissa asked, sitting up a little.  “I had heard you were with the Inquisition.”

                   “Your Highness, how did you get here by yourself?” Evelyn asked her and then stopped herself.  “Never mind.    You rest for now and we’ll get a proper, comfortable bed prepared for you.  We’ll talk later.”  Evelyn hesitated.  “Do you…want us to contact King Alistair?” she asked.  Elissa nodded.  Evelyn turned to Cullen.  “Do you think you can get Leliana?  The thought of all of those stairs right now…” Cullen nodded and headed out the door.  She turned back to Elissa.  “Leliana is still here- I’m sure she will want to see you right away.  I’m Evelyn by the way.  Evelyn Rutherford. I’m the Inquisitor.”

                   Elissa looked at her.  “Evelyn Rutherford?  I am assuming you are married to Cullen?”  She studied Evelyn closely.  She had been traveling for a while and tried to keep up with what was happening as she did so.  She remembered sending a letter to the Inquisition when they had contacted her looking for help, she had been too busy on her own mission to offer more than a letter and a few trinkets. 

                   “Yes, for a few months now your Highness,” Evelyn replied.  They sat silently for a while as Healer checked Elissa’s bandages and tucked around her to make her more comfortable.  Within minutes, Leliana burst through the door and ran to the bed, kneeling down to take Elissa in her arms.

                   “Elissa, what happened?  How did you get here?  I’ve been worried that no one has heard from you.” She continued on in the same vein for a while before stopping herself.  “Forgive me, Elissa, I shouldn’t be throwing so many questions at you.”  She turned to Evelyn.  “Have room arrangements been made, your Worship?”

                   Evelyn nodded.  “We’re getting the rooms where my parents stayed for the wedding ready.  It’s not in the main thoroughfare and is pretty comfortable.  Healer wants her on bedrest for a while, and I want to get Cole to check on the baby.  Once we get her situated and rested and fed, we can all talk.”  Leliana nodded.  Evelyn asked her, “Can you get a note to Alistair?  He needs to be informed right away.” 

                   Leliana looked at Elissa.  “Does Alistair know?” indicating Elissa’s pregnant belly.  Elissa shook her head.  “Do you want me to say something in the letter?”  Elissa thought about it for a moment. 

                   “No- not yet.  I’m a little afraid that the baby may have been hurt.  I don’t want to have him find out only to find out I lost it.” Her eyes welled with tears as she caressed her belly.  “I’m having some cramps.” She said.

                   “As soon as we get you more comfortable, we have someone who can help with that your Highness,” Evelyn said.  “Trust me, he’s helped me on more than one occasion.”

                   Elissa exhaled and nodded. 

                   Later that afternoon, they got Elissa settled into her suite of rooms and brought her something to eat.  Leliana had not left her side after writing Alistair.  She and Evelyn and Cullen were seated around Elissa’s bed as she ate and rested.  Evelyn noticed Elissa wincing as she rubbed her belly from time to time and sent to have Cole come in.  Elissa jumped as Cole appeared suddenly in the room.

                   “Your Highness, this is Cole.  He’s…different.  He can see the baby.  He likes to help.”  Elissa smiled at Cole.   Evelyn turned to Cole.  “Cole, this is Queen Elissa- I’m sure you know that.  Her baby is about as old as mine was when you were able to hear her.  Queen Elissa came in with many injuries and she’s worried the baby might be hurt.  Could you please help her?”

                   Cole nodded.  He walked over and put his hands on Elissa’s belly and sat for a while.  “He’s changing you,” he said to Elissa.  “He’s not ready to be born yet, but he’s safe for now. He removes the darkness.”  Elissa stared at him.

                   “It’s a boy?” she whispered.  She looked at Evelyn.  “I don’t understand much of the rest.”

                   Evelyn smiled.  “Yes, he does tend to speak with shadows on his tongue.  The baby is fine. Healer said that bedrest would hopefully stop the cramping- she’s coming later to check on you.  I don’t know about the darkness, though.”  She turned to Leliana, “Do you know?”

                   Leliana thought about it for a moment.  “Maybe.  I’ll look into it,” she said.

                   “Your Highness, what happened?  Are you strong enough to talk about it?”  Evelyn asked. 

                   Elissa nodded.  She and her soldiers had been wherever they could be searching for a cure for the Calling.  She had lost several soldiers near Orzammar to a renegade band of Red Lyrium Templars.  After that, they found themselves traveling near Skyhold and decided they were going to stop to rest and see if a few soldiers could be spared.  As they traveled, they were overrun by a large group of bandits.  The bandits had taken out the rest of her soldiers, and Elissa had barely managed to escape.  She had spent the last several days walking to Skyhold, resting when she could.  “Luckily, I’ve never been afraid to camp out- just like the old days.”

                   “What about the baby?” Evelyn asked.

                   Elissa bit her lip.  “I stopped to see Alistair during my travels and we had spent some time together after not seeing each other for several months.  Six weeks into traveling after and I started getting sick.  At first, I thought it was just because of the traveling.  After living in a castle for nearly 10 years, I thought I had just gotten soft.  I stopped at a healer when we got near a town and I found out I was pregnant.  I thought about going home right away, but I got a really good lead.  I figured I’d have time to chase it down before going back to Alistair,” her eyes teared up.  “I should have gone home right away.  We’ve been waiting for a baby for so long.”

                   “Did the lead pan out?”  Leliana asked. 

                   “Sort of.  To truly follow it will require a Deep Roads expedition.  As much as I want to cure the calling so I can have a good long life with Alistair, I can’t go now.  I need to think about the baby.  We will need to prepare…him to be King.  At most, we only have about twenty more years.  I was thinking of finding Nathaniel Howe to see if he would be interested in taking over.”

                   “If you like, we can try to track him down.  We have the resources.  We may be able to find some people willing to go to the Deep Roads, but right now, we’re trying to concentrate on the eradication of the Red Lyrium.  It’s too dangerous to just leave that stuff laying around.”  Evelyn said.

                   Elissa nodded.  She was getting tired, so Evelyn and Cullen left so she could get some rest.  Leliana insisted on staying with her. Leliana looked at her friend.  “You should let me tell Alistair.  He’d want to know, even if you lose it.”

                   “I know.  He was so sad for a long time after the miscarriage, I didn’t know if he would ever recover.  When I told him I wanted to find a cure for the calling, he understood, but I think deep down, he was unhappy I was leaving not knowing how long I would be gone. I thought that if I found the cure, we’d have longer together in the long run, and it kept me going, but now I just want to go home.”  Elissa sighed.  “I feel like a failure in some ways.”

                   Leliana shook her head.  “You are not a failure.  You found a lead that could find the answer.  You’ve fought for so long, it’s time to let someone else take over.  You and Alistair deserve the time you have.  We’ll find someone- I think I have someone in mind, someone other than Nathaniel Howe- I’ll talk it over with the Inquisitor.  Please let me tell Alistair about the baby.  He was here not too long ago and given how royal caravans travel, he’s probably only a week away.  You can’t be moved and he is going to want to be here if you can’t be moved.”  She took Elissa’s hand.  “He needs to know Elissa.”

                   “You’re right Leliana.  Tell him.  I’m going to sleep for a bit if you want to do it now.”

                   After Leliana had sent the second message, she decided to also send a few agents to find the caravan, so they could bring Alistair back more quickly under protection.  She saw Evelyn sitting with Varric and Dorian in the Main Hall and sat down next to them.  “How is she?” Evelyn asked. 

                   “She’s fine for now.  I’ve talked her into messaging Alistair about the baby, and I’ve sent some agents to get him back here as fast as possible.  We may have to consider the possibility that we may be housing the King and Queen here until after the baby is born. I have something else to talk to you about though.  Elissa mentioned tracking down Nathaniel Howe to take over the Deep Roads expedition to cure the Calling.  I think it’s a good idea, but I wonder if Thom Rainier shouldn’t go too.  He survived the Joining, he’s an excellent fighter, wise and I think he would be willing if the Wardens will allow it.”

                   Evelyn thought about it for a bit.  She missed Blackwall, more than she thought she would.  He had been a rock to her.  He had also been so solid and reassuring, always taking on the brunt of the battle as if to protect them all.  In some ways, she had thought he had many qualities she would have loved to have in a father.  This was going to be a dangerous mission, but she knew he would want to go.  And as a newer Warden, in spite of his age, he had a long time before the Calling started for him- more time than Nathaniel Howe.  “Get in contact with whoever you need to and see if we can make it happen if Thom is willing of course.”

                   “Lady, do you think he would say no?” Varric chuckled. “He’s jump at this chance, not only to find the cure but to atone.”  Evelyn nodded.  Leliana headed off to start making arrangements before heading back to stay with Elissa.

                   After Leliana left, Dorian looked at Evelyn.  She had pulled PeeWee from her shoulder and was letting him roam on the table, stroking him as he walked around.  “Does he still help?” he asked her.  He hadn’t forgotten watching that tiny kitten calming Evelyn out of a bad dream.  He had also noticed that she would stroke him and hold him more when she looked upset, and PeeWee would sit quietly, as if sensing she needed him.  It wasn’t an ideal solution for everyone who had suffered past trauma, but it seemed to work for Evelyn. 

                   “He does,” Evelyn said.  “He sleeps on his bed next to mine, but sometimes I wake up and he’s sleeping on my chest.  I still have bad dreams, but they’re more…manageable, I guess.  Who knew huh?”   Dorian looked at the kitten and thought about Cullen.  He was a brilliant strategist and Commander, and he had always had a more direct approach when it came to dealing with people and emotions.  He wasn’t unfeeling or insensitive towards other people’s troubles, but for a long time, he felt that people just needed to get over their pasts, like he had been forced to.  There had been no real help for him, until Evelyn came along.  Evelyn had told him that Cullen had opened up to her about what had happened to him at Kinloch Hold, and what had happened at Kirkwall- about his personal feelings and how he had had finally found his way.  Dorian didn’t know if Cullen had realized what he was doing for Evelyn when he found her that kitten, or when he made her talk to Mother Giselle, but he had made it possible for Evelyn to overcome her past in a way that he never had.  And in turn, Evelyn was helping Cullen too.  Researching lyrium addiction, remaining attentive to his symptoms so they could be alleviated early, making him take breaks when he had been working too much.  Evelyn had told him that Cullen still had nightmares, but not as often as he used to, and he had definitely mellowed out.  They were good for each other.

                   Evelyn did find it difficult to play Wicked Grace with PeeWee around, but they got a good game going Josephine, Bull and Sera joining in eventually. Her mind kept going back to Elissa however.  She eventually excused herself to go check on her.  Elissa had just woken up and was talking with Leliana.  “How are you feeling your Highness?” Evelyn asked her.

                   “I think we can dispense with the titles if I may call you Evelyn,” she said.  “I’ll bet money that you are already on a first name basis with Alistair by the time he left.”

                   Evelyn smiled. “You’d be right.  He doesn’t seem the type for pomp and circumstance- he even joined us at the Rest for a while and ended up staying a few days.  I enjoyed getting to know him.” 

                   Elissa laughed.  “He does get a little lonely for people- it probably felt good to be treated like a regular person.  There are times I wish we would have just stayed wardens and let Anora keep the throne.”  She sighed.  “Thank you for letting him stay.”

                   “It was genuinely my pleasure Elissa.  He’s a kind man and a wonderful King,” Evelyn replied.  “He’s welcome here any time he likes.”

                   “That’s good.  Because I may be here for a while,” Elissa said.  “Your Healer is concerned about the baby, and if things don’t improve, she won’t let me travel until after the baby is born.  I hope it won’t be an inconvenience.”

                   “Of course not Elissa, you are welcome here.  I just hope you will be able to see more of Skyhold then this bedroom.  I’ve been grounded too, but Healer has at least let me out of bed. We’ll make sure you have everything you need.  Hopefully, Alistair will be here within the week. We’ll make sure you are well taken care of.”

 


	44. Chapter Forty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So new guests at Skyhold- have to make up for people leaving I guess.

Chapter Forty-Four

                   Less than a week later, King Alistair came rushing back into Skyhold, frantic to see his wife.  Cullen had seen him coming and was ready to greet him when he arrived.  Evelyn was waiting with Elissa, who was still in bed as Cullen brought Alistair in.  Alistair stood still and just stared at his wife, hardly believing she was here.  He sat down on the bed and gathered her in his arms, as Cullen and Evelyn left to give them some privacy. 

                   After they left, Alistair and Elissa continued to cling to each other as Elissa cried apologies and regrets into his shoulder.  Alistair stroked her back, letting her go on before gently letting her go.  “Lissy, it’s all right.  Please, let’s talk.” Elissa started to calm down, gathering herself.  “Now, before you tell me about where you’ve been, I need to know about the baby.”  His hands went to Elissa’s stomach, feeling the hard bulge and slight quivering underneath.  “Is everything…” he trailed off, afraid to ask.  He wasn’t sure if Elissa’s apologies were simply because she hadn’t come back right away, or if it was because she might lose the baby and was afraid to tell him.

                   Elissa took a deep breath.  “Obviously, it happened when I came to visit you,” she said.  “About six weeks into the journey, I started getting sick.  I stopped at a healer at a nearby town and he confirmed.  I was about ready to turn around and come back when we got news on a lead.  The person would speak only to me, and it would take about two months to get there and back.  I didn’t want to lose the opportunity, and I figured that I would just keep finding healers along the way to check everything.  I felt fine, so I decided to take the chance.”

                   Alistair stopped her.  “After the first miscarriage, you decided to take a chance?” a little angrily.  “Elissa.  The first one almost killed both of us and our marriage.  Why would you deliberately take a chance like that?”

                   Elissa looked down. “I wanted that lead so that I could win more time for us.  Thirty years with you is not enough.  I want to grow old with our children and grandchildren and you. I had to take the chance for us.”

                   Alistair closed his eyes.  Elissa had always been a little stubborn- if she hadn’t been, one of them would have died during the blight.  He would never have been King, and married to her.  He nodded.  “That may be a discussion for another time- please tell me the rest.”

                   Elissa told about going to Orzammar to meet with a strange dwarf who had a map of the deep roads, and a charm of some sort that needed to be used.  Connor, Arl Eamon’s mage son, who had accompanied Elissa on the journey examined the charm and determined that it was of interest.  Not a fake, and very old. Once she got that information she was going to come home.  Connor decided to stay at Orzammar to study the charm and the histories in the Shaperate to see what he could find while he waited for news on the next part of the journey.  They found themselves on the way to Crestwood so Elissa could find a healer to check in with when they got attacked by Red Lyrium Templars.  They had managed to kill them, but Elissa had lost several soldiers in the process.  Crestwood didn’t have what they needed, so Elissa decided to try Skyhold before heading home- she knew she would be able to get assistance there.  She continued on telling about how they had been attacked by bandits and how the rest of her soldiers had been killed.  She managed to escape and walked to Skyhold.

                   “When I got here, they got me to Healer right away, she took care of my injuries, but they brought in one of Evelyn’s companions- a boy named Cole.  He was able to hear the baby and tell me that so far the baby is all right.”

                   “How did he do that?” Alistair asked.  He didn’t remember meeting Cole when he was here.

                   Elissa shook her head.  “I don’t know.  He did the same thing for Evelyn.  They were worried about the anchor affecting the baby and he was able to tell them it hadn’t.  He’s not exactly a boy- he’s a spirit of some kind I think.  Honestly, he made me feel so much better.”  Elissa said.  She hesitated and asked Alistair. “He told me what the baby is.  Do you want to know?”

                   Alistair thought about it for a moment.  Did he?  It didn’t matter to him, he just wanted a healthy baby that Elissa could carry to term.  Was it asking too much to know the sex of the child too?  Well, why not?  “OK,” he finally said.

                   Elissa smiled and said, “It’s a boy.”  Alistair exhaled.  A son.  Please, Maker, let this child live.  He took Elissa back into his arms.  They held each other quietly for a long time.  “Are you angry?”  she asked him.  “I would understand if you are.”  Even though she had gotten this valuable lead, she was angry at herself for taking such a chance. 

                   “Am I ever?” Alistair asked.  “I wish you would have turned around the minute you knew, but I know you couldn’t pass up the information.  Let’s hope it was worth it.  I missed you.”

                   “I missed you too love.”  Alistair moved Elissa forward so he could sit behind her on the bed, letting her curl up on him.  She had always been stronger than him- slaying the archdemon, arranging their rule instead of Anora.  She was a natural leader, and she had taught him to be a better leader too, teaching him to be stronger. Now he could be strong for her too- a lesson hard learned after the miscarriage.  They had allowed each other to be miserable and started growing apart- for a while even sleeping in different rooms.  As sad as Alistair was, he hated seeing Elissa pushing him away and suffering on her own.  After months, he finally forced her to talk to him, screaming at her as she lay in silence.  He got to the point where he couldn’t tolerate the distance and forced her to the Chantry to sort out what she wanted.  It took a few months before he would even see her.  Eventually, the distance and the help of the Chantry sisters helped them find their way back to each other.  Elissa had finally started to want to try for a baby again, but they had been unsuccessful.  Now, they had finally gotten pregnant again and again, they were in danger.  She was almost at the point where she had lost the last one.  Even though Alistair was upset that she hadn’t come home right away, he had to put that aside, if only for her sake. 

                   As they lay together, Healer came in to check on Elissa.  She greeted Alistair with a bow before checking things over.  Elissa was still cramping, but she told Healer that it didn’t feel like last time.  The last time has been excruciating, and as Elissa had time to lay in bed, her fears grew.  “We will do our best to save the babe, your Majesties,” Healer said encouragingly.  “Our little Cole has already promised to help, and Dorian, the Inquisitor’s cousin is very effective at magical healing.”

                   “Why am I still having cramps?” Elissa asked.  They were not bad, but she was still concerned. 

                   Healer patted her hand, “I won’t tell you not to worry- that never works.  I will tell you that with rest, proper nourishment and time, the cramps should go away. However, you are staying on bedrest for the time being.”  Alistair and Elissa both breathed a sigh of relief but then groaned as Healer said. “And no hanky-panky.  For a little while at least,” as she left the room.

                   After Alistair was settled, they arranged a workplace for him to use for the duration of his stay.  As he wrote some letters, Evelyn came in to see him.  “Getting set up I see?” she said as she sat in the chair before his desk.

                   “Writing to the palace to inform them of my extended stay so arrangements can be made.  Lissy and I have decided to wait on the baby news for the time being- we’ll announce when she’s in the clear.  Speaking of, any chance I can meet this Cole?” he asked.  He was curious about this boy and was hoping he could check the baby again, for his own sake.

                   “I’m sure that can be arranged. He’s around here somewhere.  Will this workspace do?  This was where my friend Solas used to stay, it’s been sitting empty since he left.  He painted all of these murals.”  Evelyn looked around the room sadly, still missing her friend.

                   “It’s fine- the murals are lovely.  I won’t be here long- I want to get back to Lissy.  I believe Master Tethras is in with her right now- she’s a fan of his books.  I have a feeling that she is not going to be able to travel until after the baby is born.  I just don’t want to risk it. We’ve been waiting so long for this baby.”

                   “I’ll wait and walk with you.  Cole will come when I call.” Evelyn said.

                   Later that evening, Cullen came up to find Evelyn lying in bed with PeeWee crawling all over her.  He lay down on the bed and curled into her, putting his hand on her belly.  “Everything all right?” he asked her quietly. She snuggled into him as he kissed her neck.

                   “Just tired.  Happy that Elissa and Alistair’s baby is doing well,” she said.  She went silent for a while before speaking again.  “Alistair seems to be pretty happy they are having a boy…”

                   Cullen ran his fingers through her hair, “I think he’d be happy either way- they both would be.”  Evelyn didn’t say anything.  Cullen could tell something was bothering her.  “Out with it Evie.  What’s wrong?”

                   Hesitantly, Evelyn asked, “Are you disappointed we aren’t having a boy?”  She knew that men often prided themselves on having a boy- carrying on the family name, etc.  When Cole told them they were having a girl, they had been so relieved that the baby was not affected that they hadn’t spoken much about the sex.  Evelyn was happy either way, she wanted a healthy baby. 

                   Cullen was surprised by the question.  He knew they hadn’t talked about it much, but it wasn’t because he was disappointed.  When he first found out Evelyn was pregnant, he was as worried as she was about the effects of the Anchor and the Well on the baby.  He didn’t even think about if it was a boy or a girl- he didn’t mind either way.  “Of course not Evie.  I can’t wait to meet our little girl.  Speaking of which, we have some preparing to do, don’t you think?  There is a large container of baby clothes sitting in my office from Lady Vivienne, a crib and rocking horse made by Blackwall in the basement, and doesn’t the baby need a name or something?”

                   Evelyn smiled.  “I suppose we do need to start getting prepared.  Not too much longer.  People keep telling me how fast it will go, along with all of the horror stories about childbirth and newborns.”  Evelyn didn’t know much about childbirth- she had read some books, but they were not very reassuring.  She didn’t even know anyone who had given birth, aside from her mother and sister- that wasn’t going to happen.  She could send a letter to Cecelia, and talk to Healer- that could help. 

                   “Horror stories?” Cullen asked.  “Like what?”  He probably had less experience with pregnancy and childbirth than Evelyn did.  He had learned to just agree with her whenever she was particularly emotional, and to get her whatever she craved to eat immediately, but he had to admit that he was worried about when she went into labor.  He had talked to Branson about Janna when they were here for the wedding.  It was obvious that Branson missed his wife, and Cullen was very worried about losing Evie the same way. 

                   “Pain, hours and hours of labor, tearing, sore breasts, leaking, sleepless nights, no personal time, dirty diapers.  You name it.” Evelyn said.  She shuddered.  She figured she was ready for the inevitability of caring for a newborn, but the pain scared her a little.   Cullen cuddled her closer.

                   “You know I’ll be there to help,” he said.  “You’re not in this alone. I never thought I would be a father, or get married, or even fall in love.  I’m ready to be a Dad.  And I think you are going to be a great Mamae.” He started to kiss down her neck, letting his hands roam over her body.  “You know…if you’re worried about losing personal time, maybe we should get it while we can?” he asked, as he nibbled on her ear.

                   Evelyn turned over to put her arms around him, shooing PeeWee off to his bed and kissed her husband. 

 


	45. Chapter Forty-Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The story continues. I'm getting close to finishing I think- finally.

Chapter Forty-Five

 

                   Evelyn still had a month to go and was ready for it to be over.  She was trying desperately to be patient and not get cranky at people, but it was getting hard.  She and Elissa spent a lot of time commiserating, and Evelyn tried to at least be grateful that she wasn’t still on bedrest like Elissa was.  They had become close friends over the last month, having bonded over being pregnant at the same time and saving the world.  Both babies were still doing well, Cole being brought around every once in a while when one of the ladies was feeling particularly emotional and needed reassurance.

                   They had gotten in touch with Nathaniel Howe and Thom Ranier about the Deep Roads Expedition, which they agreed to undertake, along with Connor and a few scholars that had been selected from Kinloch Keep when Connor stayed there during the last month.  Elissa hoped they would stop on the way through, but she didn’t count on it.  She missed Thom, and wanted to see him again, but she knew that this mission was important to Elissa and Alistair, and she hoped it was successful.  Elissa had spent some time with Fiona as well, knowing she was a former Grey Warden, trying to find out how she removed the taint.  Fiona was not very forthcoming, partly because she wasn’t completely sure how it happened, and partly because she didn’t seem to want to talk about it.

                   Since only time would tell on the Calling, Alistair and Elissa chose to make the most of their time together and enjoy the pregnancy as best they could.  While Elissa was on bedrest still, everything seemed to be progressing well enough that Alistair was comfortable in announcing the pregnancy to the kingdom.  Eamon, who still assisted Alistair sent a letter that all kinds of well-wishes and baby gifts had been coming in from everywhere. They were rarely apart- Elissa had spent a few years travelling and she had missed Alistair terribly.  It had been hard on both of them- the pressure to produce an heir had conflicted with Elissa’s desire to cure the Calling.  She had promised Alistair that she would only search for so long before settling in as Queen again, and she felt good that she had found such a promising lead.   She was ready to pass the information on and take her place as Queen, and as a mother.

                   She was also starting to go a little stir-crazy.  They tried to keep her entertained, and to keep her as cheerful as possible, but she was not used to lying in bed all the time and was having a hard time of it.  Healer finally gave her leave to get up for short times so she could take a walk in the fresh air, so every day, Elissa and Evelyn would take a walk around the courtyard, stopping to talk to people, see Brutus, sit at the Rest for a while.  Elissa took a shine to the Iron Bull- she told him stories about Sten and her travels and he shared the same.  Being able to get out and see people had an enormous effect on Elissa’s spirit and she began to plan for the baby in earnest.

                   As they were walking back to Elissa’s room for her to get a rest, Evelyn heard a familiar voice.  “Well my lady.  Lovely as always.”  She gasped, turning around and saw Thom standing with Nathaniel Howe.  Evelyn couldn’t really run anymore, but she hurried over and threw her arms around him, as Elissa did the same with Nathaniel.  Thom laughed as Evelyn tried to hug him past her large belly, which didn’t work out too well.  Evelyn and Elissa introduced their friends to each other and Nathaniel offered to escort Elissa back to her room for a visit.  They could only stay the night and Evelyn wanted to spend as much time as she could with Thom.  They went back to the Rest, where Sera launched herself from the second floor onto him. They talked for a while and then went to see Elissa where they talked about the Deep Roads expedition.

                   The plan was to go back to the Deep Roads where King Maric had once been with the Wardens to search around for the writings of the Architect.  Elissa and Nathaniel remembered him- they had killed him before they destroyed the Mother at Drake’s Fall.  With the charm that had been recovered in Orzammar, they were hoping to find some answers there.  They weren’t sure how long they would be gone, so Thom had wanted to see Evelyn one more time before going. 

                   They all had dinner at the Rest that evening-including Elissa and Alistair.  Thom told them what he could about his joining and his duties and they all ended up playing Wicked Grace into the night until Elissa and Evelyn were both falling asleep.  Cullen was happy to see Evelyn looking content as they headed to their room at that evening.  She had been having trouble sleeping, having to get up to go the bathroom several times, waking up with bad leg cramps and she felt swollen and awkward.  She had gotten to the point where she needed help getting her boots on and off, so she sat on the bed as Cullen helped her.  After he had gotten her boots off, he knelt before her, hands on her belly, feeling the kicking as they laughed.  Evelyn gazed at her husband as he held his ear to her belly, talking to the baby, telling her he couldn’t wait to see her and how she was going to be as beautiful as her mamae.  After a lifetime of hearing how plain and disappointing, she was, it still shocked her to hear Cullen say she was beautiful.  Her heart ached just looking at him- so strong, handsome and kind.  She pulled him up to her and kissed him, pulling him up on the bed with her.

                   The next morning, Evelyn arose early so she could see Thom before he left.  They had breakfast together, reminiscing about their travels and laughing at some of the conversations they had on the road.  Thom had also taken quite a liking to PeeWee, who still was small enough to sit on Evelyn’s shoulder.  Evelyn knew their time was short and fell silent for a moment.  “Thom, promise me you’ll be careful.  Try to send messages if you can- I know it will be hard where you’ll be- but take the opportunity to if someone turns back.  You’ve been like a father to me, like the father I’ve always wanted. I wish I could keep you safe, but I think this mission is your destiny.”

                   “Aye, I’ll be careful.” He took her hand.  “I’ll return as soon as I can.”  He squeezed her hand, moved by the things she had said.  He wasn’t worthy for her to consider him as a father figure, and he was honored she thought so.  “I wish I had a daughter like you.  I’m so proud of all you’ve done, all of the people you have helped, including me.  And now married with a babe on the way.  Even as my duties take me far away, know that you and your family are in my heart.  I’ll always come when you call.”  He hugged her and they walked out of the Main Hall together.  They met Elissa and Nathaniel at the stables and walked to the gates together, Evelyn and Elissa waving as they left.

                   They were both emotional as they watched the Wardens leave.  Elissa had grown close with Nathaniel, in spite of their family history, and she feared she was sending him to his death.  Elissa, wiping her eyes said, “I hope I did the right thing.”

                   Evelyn nodded. “I couldn’t think of two better suited for this.  I know they’ll be fine.  That won’t stop me from saying a prayer to the Maker though.”  They walked back to the castle quietly and went the chapel to pray. 

                   Alistair and Cullen eating breakfast and looking through some maps of the South Reach area that Branson had sent. They were possible locations for the Templar Sanctuary.  Cullen had described his plan to Alistair and showed him some of the research they had already completed and described the results they had been seeing.  Alistair was extremely interested.  He had never taken lyrium even though he had trained as a Templar, but he had seen the results of extended use of lyrium and withdrawal from it and it broke his heart to see these brave men and women used and discarded.   Cullen promised to find Warrick, Devlin, Dagna and Dorian and show Alistair the rest of their findings if he was interested.  Alistair agreed and promised that if things looked as promising as they did, that Cullen would have the help of the Crown in his endeavor- land, supplies, etc.  “I’ve often thought it a crime that the Chantry discards Templars the way they do- I wish I had thought of this earlier.” He said.  “If we can make this work, perhaps it can be introduced to Orlais and the Free Marches as well.”

                   Cullen was stunned.  He had never thought to ask Alistair for help, never considered that how much easier things could be to get set up.  “Thank you Alistair,” he said.  “I hadn’t even thought about asking.”

                   Amused, Alistair said, “You’d be the first.  It seems I’m always being asked to help people.  Gets tiring after a while.  It’s nice to be able to offer for a change.  What will Evelyn be doing while you are working with Templars?”

                   “She’s ready for a quiet life I think.  She hasn’t had an easy life, and she just wants to help in the sanctuary and raise our children,” he said.  “She came up with part of the treatment one day when she found me having a bad time of it.  Her help led me to this idea in the first place- her concern for me and her brother.  Warrick and his wife have offered to come and help, and my family lives in the area as well.  Evie needs family and a purpose, and this can give her both.  Us both,” he corrected himself.

                   Alistair nodded.  “I have to ask- what’s with the kitten?”  Of course, both Alistair and Elissa had become acquainted with the little cat as Evelyn carried him everywhere.  They both noticed that sometimes she would sigh and turn her attention to the cat, stroking him a little faster, but didn’t understand why.

                   “It’s a long story.  I said she hadn’t had an easy life.  Before I tell you, let me ask.  Are you aware of any unsolved murders- where a family is wiped out- poisoned or something?  A family with young girls that end up having worse done to them?” Cullen asked.

                   After thinking about it for a moment, Alistair replied, “Yes, now that I think about it- I’ve heard some reports over the years.  They were too random and far apart, though- but I remember Teagan mentioning one in Redcliffe.  Why?”

                   Cullen told him about Hugh and his association with Evelyn and how she finally stopped him.  “She started reading through one of the journals she had found and it affected her profoundly.  She went into hysterics and I couldn’t calm her- Healer had to give her a sedative.  She was lucky that she escaped the worst of the man, but it still haunts her.  I don’t know what made me think of it, but I brought her the kitten and they, I don’t know, bonded.  He helps her keep the nightmares away and seems to know when she is thinking long thoughts.”

                   “Extraordinary- who would have thought?” Alistair mused.  “Do you have these journals still?  Perhaps I should have someone look into them for clues so we can put the murdered families’ relatives at some kind of peace.”

                   Cullen shook his head.  “Dorian took them to read them- there were poison and antidote recipes in these journals, and Evelyn had hoped there would be more information in them.  I couldn’t let her read anymore, so Dorian read them, copied the useful information and then burned the books.  I saw his face after he read them- he had nightmares for a week.  He may have listed the names of any families mentioned by name as well- I’ll check with him.”

                   “Well, that wasn’t an answer I expected about the cat,” Alistair said. “That poor girl.  All those poor people…” he shook his head.  “Maybe the kitten is something else to consider in your sanctuary.  It won’t work for everyone, but maybe there are other ways to incorporate a way to channel anxious feelings that are similar.”

                   As they finished eating, Alistair and Cullen went to find the others and show Alistair their findings and where their research was headed next.  Cullen was still trying to take it all in- perhaps the move to South Reach would be sooner than they thought.


	46. Chapter Forty-Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally- some action.

Chapter Forty-Six

                   “Dorian, I don’t think the baby wants to come out.” Evelyn grumped as they walked in the courtyard. She was very close to her time and was getting increasingly uncomfortable.  She had just come from a checkup with Healer, who had an area prepared in their little hospital for when the baby came. 

                   “Evelyn, of course, the baby will come out.  Don’t worry,” he reassured her.  “It won’t be much longer.”  Evelyn humphed.  Nothing could make her very happy that day- she was hot, swollen and tired. Dorian looked at her.  “Why don’t we go see Brutus?  You love watching him and PeeWee together.”

                   “All right,” Evelyn sighed and took Dorian’s arm.  It was funny to see PeeWee swatting at Brutus.  As they walked over, they were joined by Chana, had recently found out she was going to have a baby as well.  PeeWee was in rare form with Brutus that day, cheering Evelyn up and making her laugh.  She scooped PeeWee up into her arms- and he climbed up onto her shoulder.

                   Evelyn had been rather quiet that day- Dorian wasn’t sure if it was because of the baby, or if it was something else.  She took Dorian’s arm again and nodded when he suggested they go to the Rest for a while.  It was a little cooler in there, and they could get a little something to eat as well.  They were joined at a table by Bull while they ate.  Dorian noticed Bull watching Evelyn as well, and wondered what was going on.  After they ate, Chana excused herself, leaving the three of them at the table.  Once she left, Bull spoke up.  “Come on Boss- something is bothering you.  Spill it.”

                   Evelyn sighed heavily.  “I shouldn’t be letting this bother me.  I already know how we’re answering, but…” she ran her fingers through her hair before grabbing PeeWee in her hands, stroking his fur obsessively.  Dorian and Bull glanced at each other uneasily- whatever was wrong was really affecting her more than she thought.  “We received a letter today.  From my parents,” she said. Bull grunted at that.  He was not the only one that wasn’t fond of Evelyn’s parents, and she didn’t need any crap from them right now.  “They’ve…taken the liberty of arranging a marriage for the baby.”  Bull slammed his hand on the table, making PeeWee jump.

                   Dorian cursed, “Fasta Vass!  Will they never learn?”  he yelled. “She hasn’t even been born yet!  What did Cullen say?”

                   She took a letter from her pocket and gave it to them.

                   _Bann and Elaina Trevelyan,_

_No._

_Cullen and Evelyn Rutherford_

Dorian started to laugh.  “Are you going to send this?” he asked her. 

                   Evelyn shrugged her shoulders.  “It was the best draft.  There were several that said “no” in a few more colorful terms.  And it seems pretty to the point.”  Cullen had been angry when they read the letter.  The letters her parents sent her had been fairly demanding, but this one was worse.  Evelyn was angry as well, but not concerned because she knew it wouldn’t happen. 

                   “So why are you so quiet and upset?” Dorian asked.  There had to be more to it.

                   “If they tried to arrange a marriage for our baby, that means that arrangements have been made for all of their grandchildren.  I’m sure there have been promises made to the Chantry and the Templars- I hadn’t even thought of it when they were here.  I just don’t want to see them forced into a marriage like they tried to do to me, and I have no control over it. I just wish there was something I could do.”

                   “Let’s think about it.  Why don’t you write to Osborne and see what you can find out from him?” Dorian suggested.  Evelyn nodded.  “Once you have an idea who has been promised where we can talk about it then.”

                   “I know I shouldn’t let it bother me.  I guess I’m still just so relieved that I ended up being able to have a life I could only dream of, that I don’t want to see anyone told what kind of life to live.” She said.  “You’re right Dorian.  I’ll write a letter to Osborne.”

                   As they sat and talked, Krem came running in.  “You have to come see,” he said breathlessly.  “Cullen and King Alistair are sparring!”  Dorian helped Evelyn get up from her chair and they hurried over to the sparring grounds.  Both Cullen and Alistair were shirtless with swords and shields in their hands.  Evelyn went to sit next to Elissa as they watched and admired their husbands.  While Alistair had not had much opportunity to have a sword in his hand lately, he was still in excellent form.  They whirled and struck at each other, blocking blows and lunging at each other, neither showing any signs of tiring.  Evelyn couldn’t help but admire Alistair- he was still fit, even after living a more sedentary life the last ten years- his broad shoulders and his abs were well defined.  Elissa was a lucky woman.  Elissa said the same of Cullen as Evelyn grinned appreciatively at the two fine men before them. 

                   They went at it for quite a while before having to call it a draw.  The men grinned at each other and shook hands.  Evelyn smiled as she watched them- who would have thought that Cullen and Alistair would become such close friends?  Her smile turned into a look of concern as she watched Cullen.  There was a tightness to his jaw that she had come to associate with a bad headache. She struggled to get up and went over to him, watching him as he wiped his sword and shield down and put them away.  He smiled at her and kissed her on the cheek, caressing her belly.  She smiled as he kissed her, and watched as he went to grab a towel and his shirt.  He stopped and with a groan, dropped to his knees.  “Cullen!” Evelyn cried, as she hurried to him.  “Someone, help him!”  Alistair and Warrick came running over and grabbed Cullen, supporting as they took him to Healer. 

                   They laid him down on a cot, and Evelyn sent Warrick to get Devlin.  Healer helped Evelyn get all of the items she usually used to help Cullen- herbs, poultices, warm and cold water, and the oil that Devlin had developed that warmed the muscles.  Alistair watched as Devlin and Evelyn tended to Cullen- sponging him down and wrapping his joints in warm herb-filled cloths.  She rubbed the oil in around his neck and shoulders and wiped his face with a cool cloth.  Dagna and Devlin described what they were doing as Evelyn anxiously watched Cullen for signs of improvement.  She looked at Alistair.  “I don’t think I’ve ever seen it come on that suddenly.  He hasn’t had an episode in months.” 

                   Devlin asked her, “Usually the episodes are brought on brought on by stress.  Any ideas on this one?”  He had been keeping notes on triggers for himself, Cullen and Warrick and a few other Templars that had quit lyrium as well- triggers, length of time on and off lyrium, how long episodes lasted, best forms of treatment.  Any piece of information that would make it easier to treat the symptoms had been carefully documented for each person.

                   “We had a letter from my parents this morning.  They arranged a marriage for our daughter,” Evelyn said.  Alistair and Elissa stared at her in disbelief.  “I don’t know if that would be a major stress factor, though.  He was annoyed about it- and wrote a letter back telling them no, but I don’t see that as being enough to cause this.”      

                   “Well, maybe that coupled with the impending birth?  Stress doesn’t always have to be negative stress,” said Devlin.  Evelyn shrugged, her eyes still on Cullen.  She went over to change the cloth on his head and sat in the chair by the bed, holding his hand in hers.  She was scared.  She had never seen this come over him so fast and take him so hard.  An hour later, she, Alistair and Devlin were still with Cullen when he finally came to.

                   “Cullen,” Evelyn started as he awoke.  She looked at him closely.  “How do you feel?”

                   He sat up slowly, ignoring the nausea.  “I’m all right.  The headache is almost gone.”  Healer came over and made him lay back down again.  He looked at Evelyn, seeing the anxiety on her face.  “Really love, I’m all right.” He did look better, and his recovery time was remarkably quicker than normal.  They both looked at Devlin.

                   Devlin asked him some questions, about the onset of the symptoms, what he thought the trigger was, and the differences before and after he collapsed.  Healer gave him a restoration potion and made him lay back down as Evelyn kept hold of his hand.  After Alistair and Devlin left, Evelyn looked back to Cullen, who was lying with his eyes closed.  “This wasn’t because of my parents was it?” she asked him.

                   He opened his eyes and looked at her.  “No love.  Everything I told Devlin was the truth.  I pushed myself too hard sparring today I think.  I’ve been anxious about the baby coming, afraid of losing you like Branson lost Janna.  I guess it worried me more than I thought.”

                   Evelyn kissed his hand and told him to rest.  “I promised Sera we would make some cookies today. Do you mind, or would you rather I stay?”  Cullen told her he’d be fine.  As soon as Healer let him go, he’d go rest for a while.

                   As Evelyn walked over to the Rest to get Sera, she felt a twinge that made her stop. She stood still, waiting to see if it happened again.  When it didn’t, she kept going, calling down to Sera to come down.  Sera jumped over the railing to land next to her- making Evelyn jealous that she couldn’t do that anymore.  She had always loved jumping down from seeing Dorian to watch Solas jump and then smile at her. They walked over to the kitchens and got out the supplies needed to make cookies when Evelyn felt another twinge, followed by a strong cramp.  She inhaled sharply and grabbed her belly, wincing in pain.  Sera looked at her, “You all right?  Do I need to go fetch Cully-wully?”

                   Evelyn was afraid to move.  Another cramp hit her and she doubled over.  Sera came to help her up. “He..He..Healer,”  Evelyn stuttered out.  Sera helped her walk out of the kitchen where they ended up out by the stables.  They slowly made their way over to Healer, people gaping at them as they went past.  As they entered, Cullen had just been getting up when he saw her being supported by Sera and called out to Healer.  He rushed to help Evelyn and got her over to the bed that Healer had prepared.

                   Healer gave her a quick exam, asking how many cramps she had and how often.  “Just lay down for a while Dear- it’s probably false labor, but we’ll keep an eye out just to be on the safe side,”   Cullen smiled at her.  After a while, she hadn’t had any more pains, so Healer let her go out.  Cullen walked with her as Evelyn waddled grumpily back to the castle. 

                   Over the next several days, Evelyn had the same false labors that kept her from sleeping and doing much else.  Cullen tried to help her as best he could and she tried not to bite his head off.  She knew he was worried, but she was so uncomfortable that she had a hard time being level headed and kind.  Cullen understood and tried not to take it personally.  “I’m so sorry Cullen,” she sighed after grumping at him.  He came up behind her and wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck. 

                   “It’s all right love.  I understand,” he said has he nibbled her earlobe.  “You know...Healer says there are things we can do to er…bring on labor…” he said as he started to unbutton her dress.

                   “Oh really?” she said, turning around and putting her arms around his neck, “do tell…”

                   A few days later, Evelyn was slowly walking over to see Elissa when Dorian caught up to her.  “Cousin, how are you feeling today?”  He had taken to shadowing her when Cullen wasn’t around- ever since she almost fell down the stairs the other day.

                   “How do you think?” she harrumphed.  “I’m swollen, have to pee all the time and my back hurts.  If I don’t have this baby soon, I’m going to reach in and yank it out myself.”  She ran her fingers through her hair in frustration.

                   “Should we go see if your husband has his shirt off?” offered Dorian.  “That always cheers you up. It cheers me up too. Or we could go see if there are any cookies in the kitchen.”  He was running out of ways to cheer her up lately.

                   “Cullen won’t let me have any cookies,” Evelyn groused.  “He cut me off of sweets.   I was just going to see Elissa if you wanted to come along.  I figured we could take a walk or go to the Rest.  I think she might have some cookies in her room,” Evelyn mused. 

                   Dorian took her hand. “I’ll sneak you some later,” he promised.  “Nothing is too good for my little niece and her mother.”  Evelyn had asked him to be there for the birth- as much as she loved Healer, she knew she would feel better if Dorian was there too.  Cullen felt better about it as well, knowing a mage with healing skills would be present.

                   “Chocolate chip cookies if you can find them, or ooh- do you think there are any of those…” she trailed off and stopped walking. “Um…Dorian?  I think my water just broke.” Dorian looked at the ground to see a large puddle forming.  He took her by the arm and started taking her over to Healer. 

                   A few hours later, Evelyn was cringing in bed as the pains came and went.  Cullen was sitting by her side as were Dorian and Elissa.  Healer came over to check on her and told them she still had some time to go yet if people wanted to go get some sleep.  Elissa decided to lay down on the bed next to Evelyn and Dorian and Cullen elected to stay with Evelyn.  Cullen was watching Evelyn with some concern- he had never seen someone in so much pain and even with Dorian here, he was still terrified he was going to lose her. 

                   Evelyn tried to sleep, but it was difficult with the contractions.  Cullen stayed by her side, dozing when he could, but his attention was on Evelyn.  After several more hours, the contractions started becoming constant.  Healer checked her over and told her it was almost time to push.  They leaned Evelyn forward and let Cullen get behind her so he was supporting her against himself. Elissa sat next to the bed and Dorian and Healer were at the foot of the bed.

                   After several pushes, the time came.  “I see the head.  One more dearie.  One more should do it.”  Evelyn pushed as hard as she could as Healer maneuvered the baby out.  Evelyn laughed as she heard the baby cry.  Dorian invited Cullen to come and cut the cord as Healer and Elissa took care of Evelyn- helping push the afterbirth and getting her cleaned up and dressed in a fresh nightgown.  After Healer checked out the baby and cleaned her up, she swaddled the baby and brought her over to her parents and put her in Evelyn’s arms.  Dorian came over to sit by the bed as well, looking at the little girl.  “She’s beautiful Cousin.  What’s her name?”

               “Charlotte Stanton Rutherford,” Evelyn said, gazing at the little person in her arms.  Cullen put his arms around Evelyn and looked down at his daughter.  Dorian and Elissa after hugs and kisses all around and left to give the new family some privacy.  After they left, Healer helped Evelyn learn how to nurse her daughter.  Evelyn never felt more complete than she did at that moment- leaning back on her husband while feeding her newborn daughter.  She was beautiful.  She didn’t have much hair yet, and but her sweet face was a mixture of hers and Cullen’s.   Cullen watched over his little family, relieved that Evelyn made it through and that their daughter was finally here.


	47. Chapter Forty-Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So the story continues. I've been seeing some plagiarism problems cropping up here- not with my writing- but there are some really great writers here who are having problems. I've gotten some ideas on where to take my story from other fics on here- like in this chapter, Alistair makes an offer to Cullen. I would never have considered this aspect if I hadn't have read something similar in Ricketyrogue's wonderful story "Not Your Lady". The story lines are nowhere remotely the same, but I feel that it's important to point out that I did get the idea from that story- so I try to give credit where it's due. No matter how blocked I get, I would never stoop to stealing someone else's words.

Chapter Forty-Seven

                   Evelyn had finally gotten the hang of nursing Charlotte after a few weeks of pain and constant feeding.  It had been a difficult few weeks- Evelyn had been up almost every hour all night feeding Charlotte- she just couldn’t seem to make enough milk to keep her satisfied.  There had been many moments of crying and frustration, even with Healer’s and Cullen’s help, but things were slowly getting on track.  There were many times that Evelyn would wake up in the morning to find Cullen sleeping next to her with the baby lying on his chest.  She smiled whenever she saw that- Cullen had to be the sexiest Papae in all of Thedas.

                   Dagna and Harritt had fashioned a sling for Evelyn and Cullen so they could carry Charlotte close to them.  Evelyn was anxious to hear the updates on the red lyrium cleanup- and to hear how things had been cleaning up.  She was gently bopping the baby and bouncing a little as she listened to Dagna talk about their discoveries.  Evelyn had smashed her fair share of the lyrium shards that she had come across, but she knew it wasn’t enough to destroy it.    Right now, they were focusing on safely removing the lyrium and storing until a way to destroy it could be perfected.  The growth had been slowed down immensely since Samson and Corypheus were finished, and the scholars from the University of Orlais, and the researchers that Varric hired were working fast to finish it.  Evelyn never got over what she had seen in the future Redcliffe- the lyrium growing out of people.  She still sometimes had dreams of Cullen being overtaken by it, which woke her up in a cold sweat every time.

                   After the meeting, Evelyn was handed a letter from Osborne.  She wanted to read it right away, so she handed Charlotte over to a gleeful Varric, who immediately sat down with the sleeping girl and started reading her a story.

                   _My dear Evelyn,_

_Congratulations on the birth of your little Charlotte.  I am thrilled you chose to name her after our sister. I received your letter regarding her and understand your anger.  Mother and Father have taken it upon themselves to plan the future of all of their Grandchildren- whether they were asked to or not.  Our eldest, Edward, of course, will marry and carry on as Bann when the time comes, and Charles has been promised to the Templars.  Sophia has been promised to a local Noble’s son and Piper has been promised to the Chantry.  Little Whitford has also been promised to the Templars.  As for Charlotte, I know they had arranged a marriage to an Orlesian, but I do not know who.  I will try to find out so that you may contact them directly and handle the situation as you see fit._

_Mother and Father were not happy to read your rather rude letter, but I found it amusing.  As for Cecelia and I, we have decided to follow your example and let our children choose their own path.  You made quite an impression on Cecelia, not only for standing up for yourself but for now standing up for your daughter. She is with child again, and while she says she will be happy for a healthy baby, I know she wants a girl badly, and that if the Maker blesses us with a girl, that she will not allow them to arrange a marriage for her._

_Clarissa, on the other hand, is not going against Mother and Father.  Sophia and Piper don’t really understand yet, but Piper especially misses you.  She doesn’t say anything in front of her mother, but when she is with us, she talks about you non-stop. She even talked the Stablemaster into making her little toy daggers- she hides them of course.  Clarissa does not like it when you are talked about- which is awkward because everyone around here talks about you all the time.  She returned from the wedding a very bitter woman and it’s beginning to show physically.  It’s rather sad actually. Given your history, I know you are upset about Sophia and Piper especially.  My advice to you is to send the girls encouraging letters- send them to me and I will make sure they get them.  When the girls get older, your support may give them the courage to get out before it’s too late._

_Again, congratulations on your little girl.  I’m sure she’s just as beautiful as her mother._

_With love,_

_Osborne_

Evelyn folded the letter and looked up.  Cullen was still talking with Leliana and watching Varric read to the baby with some amusement.  Evelyn looked at the letter again and decided to write the girls that very day.  She hoped that it would make a difference if the girls wanted it and that they would be strong enough to leave if they chose.  She got up and walked over to Cullen, waiting for him to finish her conversation before giving him the letter.  He read it over, sputtering over the news.  “Orlais? Are your parents mad?” he looked at Evelyn.  “I’ll talk to Leliana and see if she can find out the name of the family.  We need to contact them as soon as possible.”  Evelyn nodded. 

                   She gave Cullen a kiss as he headed to for some training and took a seat near Varric to listen to his story.  Charlotte was awake and looking at the colorful pictures in the book.  Evelyn smiled at her little girl.  She wondered if her mother had ever smiled at her that way when she was that little, or if she had just been passed off to a nanny right away.  Evelyn hadn’t even bothered with a nanny- she didn’t need to.  Everyone loved to take a turn holding Charlotte, except Josephine, whom Charlotte had a tendency of throwing up on.   Even Bull could be found with a Charlotte sprawled across his chest from time to time. 

                   After Varric had finished reading, Evelyn took Charlotte and went to find Elissa.  She was a month away from her time and had been having some complications that had put her back in bed.  She was trying her best to stay optimistic. She sat in a chair near Elissa’s bed nursing Charlotte as they talked about the war table meeting and the letter from her brother. 

                   “Honestly Elissa, my parents thought I’d be ok with them arranging a marriage for Charlotte? How could they think I’d agree?” She shook her head in disgust. 

                   Elissa smiled. “My parents probably would have arranged a marriage for me had they been given the time.  Dairren Loren was the son of Lady Landra and Bann Loren.  The day that Rendon Howe took over the castle, Landra and Dairren were visiting us- our mothers were really trying hard to set us up.  I don’t know if it could have been called an arrangement, but it was pretty close.  They both died that night.  Sweet Dairren…” she trailed off, lost in her memories for a moment. “I did like him- you never know what could have happened,” she said.  “Granted, I much prefer how things did work out.”

                   Evelyn thought about it for a while.  “I suppose arranged marriages can work out.  My parents seem fond of each other I guess even if they don’t care much for their children- but I just can’t bring myself to do that.  I would have been miserable- I can’t bear that for Charlotte.  I want her to be able to choose. 

                   “So, you wouldn’t want to have a chat about the boy I’m carrying?” Elissa joked.  “They’d probably be perfect for each other, and the in-laws would get along…” Evelyn laughed.

                   “Well, I won’t make an arrangement, but I would probably encourage her when the time came,”  Evelyn replied.  “Cullen won’t do it either.  He said he watched it almost destroy me.  Let’s talk in eighteen years.”  The women laughed together as Alistair and Cullen came into the room. 

                   Elissa sobered up for a moment.  “We do have something important to talk to the two of you about, though.”  She looked at Alistair, who nodded. Elissa exhaled and said, “We don’t know if the cure for the taint will be found, so we were hoping that we could ask you to be there for our baby when the time comes for us to take our calling.  We know he’ll be an adult- but he will still be young and inexperienced.  I’ve already talked to my brother Fergus and he will be there, but I have a feeling that he will need extra support.

                   Cullen and Evelyn looked at each other.  “Of course, we’ll be there- but I don’t know if we would be very effective.  Hopefully, when that time comes, we’ll be running our sanctuary and no longer be the Inquisitor and the Commander.  Evelyn is noble, but a Marcher, and I’m not a noble at all.  We’d have no official voice, but we would be happy to serve as advisors”         

                   Alistair nodded.  “That’s where we come in. We’ve looked at the maps of land your brother sent and had a suggestion.  Have you thought of returning to Honnleath?”

                   Cullen frowned and shook his head.  “I guess not.  My family moved to South Reach- and we were looking there so we could be close to them.”  Honnleath had been home to Cullen, and his parents were buried there- but it hadn’t occurred to him to go back permanently.  He had heard it had been slowly growing since the Blight.

                   Alistair spoke up again.  “The land in Honnleath is rather valuable.  Teagan has been forced to supply more soldiers there to keep the area safe.  It’s just remote enough, and there is no mage circle.  If you establish your sanctuary there, Teagan can have his soldiers back and the area will be protected.  Maybe your family could move back?”  Cullen and Evelyn looked at each other.  Alistair continued, “To make things easier, you would become a Bann, Cullen.  Well, both of you would.  I…we would like to award it to both of you for your service.”

                   Silence filled the room as Cullen digested this offer.  Evelyn had always been a noble, but as the youngest daughter, she never would have become a Bann in her own right, and Cullen knew that she never cared about it anyway.  It was something he had never even considered.  It would be an ideal location- remote but not inaccessible, little Chantry involvement- and it was home.  He hadn’t lived there in a long time, but he had wonderful memories.  Memories he would like to share with his wife and children while making more with them.  He looked at Evelyn, who had finished feeding Charlotte and had transferred to her shoulder, lightly patting her.  She nodded at him.  “I’ll go wherever you want Cullen.  If that would make you happy, then it would make me happy.”

                   Cullen’s head was whirling.  “I’d like to write my family about it.  I really want to live near them- I’d like to wait to hear if they would be willing to move back.”  Having a family of his own, and having his family at Skyhold for the wedding had made him realize how much he wanted to be near them again.

                   Alistair nodded.  “Fair enough.  Regardless, making you a Bann will stand wherever you choose to move.  It will help you get what you need for your Sanctuary.”  Alistair kissed Elissa again and stood to leave.  Cullen left as well, wanting to write the letters right away.  The more he thought about Alistair’s offer the more he liked it.  He hoped that his siblings would be willing to move back- he knew Mia and Rosalie were both wanting to start a family, and there was already Michael- Charlotte would have cousins to play with.  He smiled as he headed to his office.

                   After the men left, Evelyn smiled at Elissa.  “I think Cullen really likes the idea. It is a generous offer.  Words cannot express…”

                   Elissa interrupted her.  “Alistair had been trying to think of a way to reward Cullen for a long time.  He’s been through so much, and his efforts, like the others of the Inquisition, should not be ignored.”  Alistair had been trying to find ways to give commendations to those that were part of the Inquisition in the form of awards, contracts- however, he could- He and Empress Celene were in accordance on this and had both been working to make their lives easier somehow.  “The question is- how soon will this happen?” Elissa asked. “Are you ready to give up being the Inquisitor?”

                   Evelyn nodded without thinking.  “Yes.  I’ve been ready since the day the war was over- since Solas left.  My friends have been leaving slowly.  Varric is planning to leave again next week, and Dorian soon after.”  Her eyes teared at the thought of his leaving. He needed to go home, but she couldn’t bear to be without him.  She had asked him, with Cullen in agreement, to be Charlotte’s Godfather, and Dorian had been delighted.  “Soon, they will all be gone and this place won’t be the same.  I think most of our work is done.  The rifts are closed, red lyrium cleanup is underway.  I don’t see what more we can do.  I think the rest needs to be left to others now.” 

                   Elissa smiled. “Alistair and I thought about just staying with the Wardens and letting Anora rule- life would have been so much simpler I think.  As it turns out, Alistair is an excellent King- he cares for the people in a way that Anora never could.  But I know that he sometimes wishes he would have just stayed a Warden.”

                   Evelyn remained silent for a while, Charlotte sleeping on her shoulder as PeeWee jumped on her lap.  “I’m torn. I’m ready to leave this behind, but I feel like I’m letting others down.  Bull and Sera will be fine, but Josephine and Leliana are still here.  They haven’t discussed moving on, and we still have fortresses occupied all over Fereldan and Orlais.  I don’t want to abandon the Inquisition soldiers.  We have others that can take over here- and agents that can help as well- they can oversee the agreements we made with Alistair and Gaspard about cleanup and defense.  I guess we are going to have to start putting things in order soon- especially of Cullen’s family agree to move.”  Elissa waited as Evelyn thought about it some more. “Cullen told me the other day that he felt that time was of the essence on his sanctuary.  That episode he had a month ago scared him and he worries about other Templars going through the same thing.  He just wants to save everyone.”  A few more Templars had approached Cullen about stopping lyrium recently.  Seeing the red lyrium Templars had a profound effect, and many had seen senior Templars just cast out when they were  no longer useful.  For a long time, it was just part of the job- but after the Blight, the rebellion, and the War, many of the younger Templar recruits were afraid. 

                   Elissa reached over and patted Evelyn’s hand.  “We’ll work it out.  Don’t worry.”


	48. Chapter Forty-Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the Prince arrives!

Chapter Forty-Eight

                   The last month had brought on many goodbyes.  Varric had left with another contingent of soldiers headed to Kirkwall, and a week later, Dorian left.  He spent as much time with his “little Darling” as he could, as well as with Evelyn and Bull.  It was a tearful goodbye for them both.  Evelyn understood that Dorian wanted to go home and make changes, and felt selfish for wanting him to stay- she would never have asked him to.  She stood in the courtyard leaning on Brutus, who had come to stand by her as she wept. Bull, who had come to see Dorian off as well, gave Evelyn a hug and wandered off to go hit something for a while.  Sera was going to be leaving soon, and Bull was starting to accept some contracts. Bull told her that they would always be available to the Inquisition if needed but they had other contracts coming their way that he couldn’t pass up.

                   As Evelyn patted Brutus, Cullen approached her with a letter.  He had Charlotte in a sling as she slept- he loved to carry her around and show her off. 

                   _“Dear Cullen, Evelyn, and Charlotte,_

_We were all surprised to receive your letter, not only because Cullen actually wrote himself, but because of the contents.  Cullen, a Bann!  I hope you don’t expect us to call you “my lord.”  I just can’t bring myself to say it to someone I beat at chess on a regular basis._

_We have talked over your offer and it was unanimous that we should move back to Honnleath.  As you know, my Kyle and Rosalie’s Averil are farmers, and have heard that Honnleath has excellent farmland- they are anxious to give it a go.  Branson was a little reluctant because Janna is buried here, but Honnleath needs a blacksmith and he wants Michael to be by his cousins when they hopefully come along.  So I guess we are moving back home!  We will get our affairs settled here and be in Honnleath within the next six months.  Please keep in contact with a timeline as you can.  We can’t wait to see you again._

_Love,_

_Mia_

                   Evelyn smiled.  “I guess it’s settled then.  We move to Honnleath?” Cullen’s grin couldn’t have gotten any wider if he tried.  Evelyn knew that there were many details that would need to be worked out, and they would not be truly away from the Inquisition for quite some time, but there was no reason they couldn’t start their new lives as well. 

                   Cullen took Evelyn in his arms and they held onto each other, Charlotte sleeping between them, warm and snug.  “Our new life starts, my love,” he murmured in her ear.  “Family, a home of our own, maybe a few more of these,” indicating the sleeping child between them.

                   “Sounds good to me, but if you cut off my cookie supply on the next one, things will get ugly,” she said.  They stood that way for a while, Evelyn torn between sorrow over Dorian leaving and joy over the thought of their new life. “We should go tell Alistair.”  Cullen nodded, and after patting Brutus on the rump, sending him back to the stable, they went to do just that.

                   They arrived at Alistair’s and Elissa’s rooms to find that Elissa had gone into labor.  Healer was bustling about making preparations as Elissa groaned in pain, Alistair trying not to faint.  Elissa held out her hand to Evelyn.  “Please stay,” she pleaded.  Evelyn turned to Cullen and kissed him and kissed Charlotte on her little head.  Cullen told her he’d bring Charlotte to her when it was time to eat, and wishing Elissa luck, took his leave.

                   A few hours later, Elissa was close to pushing.  Alistair was sitting behind her, just as Cullen had sat behind Evelyn.  Evelyn, while feeding Charlotte was holding her hand and Healer was checking Elissa over.  They had summoned Lysas, the elven mage to be on hand in case they needed a magical healer.  Within the hour, Alistair and Elissa’s little boy came into the world, healthy and screaming. 

                   After he was cleaned up, Healer brought him over to Elissa and helped her to start nursing.  “Well, your Highness, doesn’t this little one need a name?”  Evelyn chuckled- it was like déjà vu.  She cuddled Charlotte to her as she waited to hear the name.

                   Alistair looked down at his wife and son, elated.  “Duncan Cousland Theiren,” he answered. 

                   The next day, Cullen came in to greet the new prince and to talk to Alistair about Honnleath.  Cullen was carrying Charlotte again, and Duncan was fussing, so Alistair and Cullen went to walk outside and talk. “My family has agreed to move back to Honnleath.  My sister said it would take about six months to arrange their affairs and get settled, so Evelyn and I are going to start making arrangements.  We need to find a house or build one.  This is all a little overwhelming,” Cullen said smiling.

                   They walked along quietly for a while, both contemplating the changes that had come about in their lives.  Cullen spoke again, “I suppose that you and Elissa will be going back to Denerim soon.”  Evelyn had talked about it last night, watching another friend leave.  While she would be sad to see them go, she was happy that the baby was healthy and that Alistair and Elissa were doing well together. 

                   “As soon as Elissa and Duncan are able to travel, we should be on our way.  It will be hard-we’ve both really enjoyed staying here, but Kingly duties still await.  I can only do so much from here.”  Cullen nodded, as his hands rubbed Charlotte’s little rump through the sling.  Alistair looked at him.  “I know the wives will stay in contact- they’ve developed quite the bond. We’ll have to trade visits.  I think Elissa wants Duncan and Charlotte to be er…friends later.”  Cullen laughed and looked at his little one. 

                   “He’ll have to get through me first,” he said. “And Dorian, Iron Bull, Varric- etc.  This little one has a lot of protective uncles. Aunts probably as well.”  He grew quiet.  “I’ll arrange for Inquisition soldiers to accompany you to Denerim- just let me know when.

                   The next day, everyone had gathered in the War Room to discuss plans for the future.  Alistair announced that they planned to leave in a week, so arrangements were started for that- Bull insisting that he and his Chargers provide the escort for them.

                   Then Cullen stood.  “As you know, Evie and I have been talking about moving to South Reach to start the Templar sanctuary.  King Alistair has encouraged me to change the location to Honnleath for various reasons, and my family will be joining us there- the timetable will be 6 months.  As it stands right now, Evie and myself, Warrick, Chana and Devlin will be moving to Honnleath.  We would like to ask Cole to join us, but it is his choice.  I guess the question is, what about the rest of you?”

                   Leliana spoke up.  “Josie and I are going to remain at Skyhold for the time being.  With lyrium cleanup underway and some order still needs to be maintained for a while.  It’s nothing we can’t handle with the remaining soldiers.  Ser Barris can lead a field team with Lysas and some others.  Sutherland and company are still here.”  Leliana hesitated.  “What about you two?  Do you want to completely remove yourselves from the Inquisition, or do you just want to be advisors?”

                   Cullen and Evelyn looked at each other. They had talked about this. “We don’t want to abandon the Inquisition.  We will remain available if needed.” Cullen said.  “I would like to name Rylen as my second in command.  I trust him completely.  We didn’t come to this decision lightly.”

                   Josie nodded.  “We know that Commander.  You have both earned your right to live the life you choose.  Rest assured that we will consider carefully before contacting you.  You will both be missed.”

                   Evelyn smiled.  “What about you Bull?”

                   Bull shifted in his chair.  “We’re going to stay here as a home base for now if that’s all right.  We’ll work for the Inquisition if needed, and take other contracts as well.”  Evelyn agreed and told him that they could stay as long as they wanted.

                   Leliana promised to send a few messenger birds along with Evelyn so they could keep in contact when they moved.  It was a quiet meeting- the Inquisition wasn’t breaking up, but it seemed untold that Evelyn was the heart of it, and her leaving was sad for everyone. 

                   As the meeting broke up, Evelyn sat in her chair for a moment longer, Leliana stayed behind as well.  Evelyn looked at her.  “I feel like I’m letting you all down,” she said, looking at her hands as they were clasped on her lap. 

                   Leliana knelt down before her and put her hands over Evelyn's.  “You are not letting us down, Inquisitor.  You have earned the right to a quiet life, and no one here would ever begrudge you that.  You have come so far from when we first met, it’s sometimes hard to believe you are the same person.  You and Cullen deserve every happiness that comes your way.  We all feel that way.”  Evelyn smiled in gratitude.

                   Evelyn left the room and followed Cullen, who had taken Charlotte upstairs and was changing her diaper.  He tickled her legs and she gave him a smile.  “Evie, come quick- she’s smiling” he called excitedly.  It was her first, and it was beautiful. 


	49. Chapter Forty-Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one, and I'm almost caught up to what I am currently working on. The kind words and kudos are greatly appreciated!

Chapter Forty-Nine

                   A week later, Evelyn hugged both Elissa and Alistair and kissed little Duncan on his forehead as the got ready to leave.  Their travels with Bull and the Chargers meant that Bull would be gone almost a month, leaving Cole as the last companion.  Sera had left a few days before after one last cookie baking session with Evelyn.  Cullen was also preparing to leave- heading to Honnleath with Cole, Warrick, and a few soldiers to scout the area and hopefully find a home.  So Evelyn was looking forward to a very lonely time at Skyhold.  Leliana and Josie kept her company, and the baby kept her busy, but she had grown so used to being with Cullen that it was hard to be apart from him.  She wondered how she had managed it during the war. 

                   She spent her time writing letters to Dorian and Varric, and she even received a letter from Thom.  He wrote that they were making progress-they had found the area they needed and were in the process of searching.  Connor was an invaluable help, and Thom asked her to pass that along to Alistair so Eamon could know. 

                   After about two weeks, Evelyn received a letter from Cullen.

                   _My love,_

_How I miss you!  We arrived at Honnleath to find that the citizens had already been informed of my arrival and our possible plans for the area.  They had the square decorated in my honor- they’ve made a replica of the Golem that had stood there for years and I received a hero’s welcome.  They are all delighted to hear about the Sanctuary and had already staked out some land for it.  I believe I have found us a home- a home just outside the village that can be added onto as more children come.  It is just what I’ve always wanted- I hope you will like it too.  If not, we can use it as a temporary home until we can find one that we both like.   Warrick found a home in town for him and Chana and there is enough land for Mia and Rosalie and the town has a smithy, with no smith.  It’s like the Maker is smiling upon us._

_I should be home in two weeks or so.  I cannot wait to see you and Charlotte._

_Love,_

_Cullen._

Evelyn grinned as she read the letter- the home sounded perfect to her.  She went to find Chana to see if she had received a letter and compare notes.  She had received one, and it had the same information.  Chana’s pregnancy was advancing, but she wanted to move as soon as possible.  Evelyn and Chana had been spending a lot of time with Josephine and Leliana- they were all a little lonely.  Charlotte kept everyone on their toes, coming down with the croup right after Cullen left.  Evelyn had many sleepless nights tending to the little one- Daria helped out as best she could and Healer helped out as well. 

                   The next two weeks went by slowly for everyone, especially for Evelyn and Chana.  When they heard the guards yelling, they both came running to find Cullen and Warrick dismounting from their horses.  Cullen smiled as he put his arms around his wife and daughter, Evelyn squeezing him as tight as she could without squishing Charlotte.  After Evelyn hugged Warrick and Cole, she and Cullen took Charlotte and started to walk to the castle.

                   As they ate dinner, they talked about Cullen’s travels and Charlotte’s croup.  Cullen took out a map of Honnleath and showed her where their house was and what land they had set aside for the sanctuary.  Evelyn could tell that he was very excited to be moving back there and that his family would be joining them.  Evelyn told him about the timetable that she and Leliana and Josephine had set up for their departure- it was going to be sooner than they had thought.  They headed upstairs so Evelyn could nurse Charlotte while Cullen went over some correspondence at their desk.  She had finally settled into a rhythm and had no more difficulty with nursing- Cullen watched her as she fed Charlotte, rocking and singing to her as she nursed.  He smiled at the sight- he had missed them so much on his travels.  He was looking forward to moving into their little home, just the three of them. 

                   The next weeks were spent packing and getting ready for the journey.  Cole had decided to stay at Skyhold for a while yet, helping Bull’s Chargers when they needed it, and staying around for general protection.  Finally, all arrangements had been made and Cullen, Evelyn, Warrick, Chana, and Devlin were off to Honnleath.  They arrived to another hero’s welcome, the citizens of Honnleath waving excitedly at having the Inquisitor living in their little town.

                   Within a few months, the little families had settled into an easy rhythm.  Cullen and Warrick spent their days working on the Sanctuary with Devlin and the few Templars that had already begun their treatment.  They received help from the inhabitants of Honnleath and used the Inquisition, and Alistair to spread the word about the Sanctuary.  Evelyn spent her days caring for Charlotte, setting up her little home and helping Cullen when she could.   It was a quiet life that they both enjoyed.

 


	50. Chapter Fifty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So we're getting into the home stretch and starting Trespasser. I'm not going to go too much into the actual plot of Trespasser since most everyone reading this knows the game fairly well. There will be bits and bobs here and there as needed, but I'm going to focus on a more original portion of the story. Hope you like it!

Chapter Fifty

                   About nine months after they had arrived in Honnleath, Leliana arrived suddenly to inform them that they were being summoned to an Exalted Council at the Winter Palace.  The Inquisition had remained active and powerful even though Evelyn and Cullen had moved on.  They had been kept updated on what was happening through messages from Leliana and Josephine. 

                   In the year that they had been living in Honnleath, many things had changed.  Cullen’s siblings arrived and settled in, the Sanctuary had been completed and Templars had slowly started coming in.  Many of them were older Templars who had seen their friends suffer and die and were afraid of going the same way themselves, or had brought those friends along hoping that there was still a chance to save them.  In some cases, there had been a success, but a few were just too far gone.  For them, Cullen created a small graveyard/shrine for those who did not make it.  He would often find some of these Templars sitting in reflection of their lost friends- it seemed to provide some comfort. 

                   Devlin had come up with a few new treatments involving a modified version of one of Hugh LaMonte’s potions that forced lyrium out of the body.  It worked on younger Templars who had enough strength and fortitude to take it- but not so well on the older ones.  Between the treatments that had helped Cullen and Warrick, and the new developments coming from Devlin and sent by Dagna, they are seeing much more success than failure.  Evelyn kept busy treating those who were ailing- it was a common sight to see her with Charlotte sitting on her hip while tending those who needed it. 

                   Charlotte was growing bigger every day.  At almost a year old, she still hadn’t grown much hair, but she had her mother’s beautiful blue eyes and a merry personality.  The older Templars all loved to see her and loved to make her laugh her infectious little belly laugh.  They all treated her like their favored granddaughter and delighted in making little toys and dolls for her.  Chana had her baby- a little boy they had named Kronin.  Rosalie was expecting her first and Branson was courting a lady in the village.

                   Even PeeWee seemed happy in his new home.  He had grown into a large orange tomcat- definitely going against his name.  He could no longer ride on Evelyn’s shoulder, but he would jump in her lap whenever he could, and always if he could tell that she was thinking long thoughts. 

                   Leliana’s visit was not announced and had caught everyone by surprise.  She sat that the dinner table with Cullen and Evelyn and told the what was happening. Fereldan was insisting that it was time to disband the Inquisition, while Orlais wanted to take control.  The time had come to make a decision, so delegates from both Fereldan and Orlais would be coming for an Exalted Council, along with the Chantry. 

                   Hearing this news, Cullen and Evelyn talked into the night, making plans- both knowing they had to attend.  They spent a few days gathering what they needed and they made arrangements for Warrick to take over the Sanctuary for the time being.   Cullen and Evelyn had agonized about whether or not to bring Charlotte along.  They didn’t want to leave her behind, but given the atmosphere of the meeting, they decided to follow Leliana’s advice and decided to leave her with Mia, who would stay with her at the Sanctuary.  It made Evelyn feel better that she would be well protected, but she was still nervous about it.

                   A few days later, they left for the Winter Palace.  Leliana accompanied them instead of heading back to Skyhold, trusting that Josephine would handle the travel arrangements for those that needed to travel from that location. Evelyn was apprehensive about the whole council, as was Cullen.  Leliana had told her that all of the companions had been contacted and it sounded like they were all going to be there- it was the only part of this that Evelyn was looking forward to.

                   They spent the trip talking over Inquisition business- Leliana, Josephine, and Rylen had kept them informed throughout the year, but Leliana told them a few of the more humorous stories about Bull and his exploits and some of the scrapes that Ser Barris’ group got into.  The more that Evelyn heard, the more she felt sure that it was time for the Inquisition to end. 

                   One evening, as Cullen and Evelyn were sleeping in their tent, Evelyn awoke screaming as the anchor flared up and started cramping her arm.   Cullen woke with a start, and seeing Evelyn holding her arm, put his arm around her tried to calm her down.  Evelyn cradled her arm against her body, trying to breathe through the pain and after a few minutes, the anchor faded out and the pain receded, Evelyn exhaling in relief.  She looked at Cullen.  “I don’t know what happened,” she said.  “It hasn’t hurt like that since I first got it.” Cullen frowned in concerned and looked at her arm. 

                   “Inquisitor, is everything all right?” she heard Leliana call from outside.  They got up and stepped outside.   As Evelyn described what she felt to them, they both studied her arm in concern.  They saw nothing different at all.  “We will be at the Palace in a few days, perhaps we can have someone check it out?” Leliana suggested.  Evelyn nodded. They went back to their tents to lie down again, Cullen holding Evelyn in his arms the rest of the night.

                   A few days later, they arrived at the Palace.  Before entering, they changed into their Palace uniforms and met Josephine on the outskirts.  She was adamant that they needed to make an entrance, so Cullen, Evelyn, and Josephine mounted their horses and rode into the palace, Evelyn enjoying the gasps and stares that were caused by Brutus.  As they rode they discussed the meetings and then Josephine said something that almost made Evelyn come to a dead stop.  She managed to keep going until they could dismount and find some privacy.

                   “What do you mean marriage proposals for Cullen?  They do realize he is already married.  Empress Celene sent us a wedding gift for Maker’s sake.”  Evelyn hissed.  She didn’t know what was going on, but she was very uncomfortable, and based on the look on Cullen’s face, he was too.

                   Josephine shifted uncomfortably.  “Those who are proposing don’t seem to care about that, Inquisitor,” she said.  “I’ve overheard some conversations that there are some ladies that are going to be very…er…persistent.  They seem to think that your marriage is one of convenience and they intend to rescue him.”

                   “Maker’s breath,” Cullen huffed.  “This is the last thing we need.”  Cullen hated coming to the Winter Palace in the first place- all those foolish games and social climbing- he had no patience for that.  He remembered the last visit and some of the ladies who wouldn’t leave him alone.  Luckily, they had been in public, so aside from someone touching his bottom, no one could get more aggressive than that.  He made a mental note to talk to Leliana about Orlesian women and what he should watch out for.  He had a feeling that there was going to be more aggressive attempts and decided to add extra security to their rooms. 

                   Cullen was quiet as they unpacked.  Evelyn looked at him with some concern- he had handled worse than some overeager women, so she wasn’t sure what to make of his mood.  She took him by the hand.  “Cullen, talk to me.”

                   Cullen slammed the drawer that he was putting some items in.  “This is the last thing we bloody need- a bunch of desperate women hanging about trying to win my attention.  My only concern is for your safety.  Orlesians are fond of mercenaries and assassins- if they are looking to win me- they can only do that by getting to you.”

                   Evelyn walked up behind Cullen and put her arms around him, resting her head on his back.  “Don’t worry love.  Our friends are here, and Inquisition soldiers as well.  I’ll see if I can get a message to Celene as well.  Come on- we have some time to kill and I want to make love to my husband.”  Cullen smiled and turned around, putting his arms around her.

                   The next morning, after visiting with Mother Giselle, Evelyn started looking for her friends.  Giselle had directed her to meet the Ambassadors and Divine Victoria first- pointing out where they were located.  Evelyn killed two birds with one stone when she found Cassandra with Teagan.  She was surprised to hear that Cassandra still found the Inquisition to be needed- they did not take the time to discuss it, but she knew they would have to eventually.  She spoke with Teagan for a while as well, learning his position on the Inquisition.

                   After speaking to the two of them, she went to find the Tevinter ambassador, letting out a squeal when she found out it was Dorian.  She flung herself into his arms, hugging him tightly.  It was a tearful reunion for both of them- but Evelyn had to move on and talk to Cyril de Montfort, the Orlais representative at the Council.  Evelyn found herself overwhelmed already, and the Council hadn’t even started yet. 

                   Evelyn had many happy reunions with her friends over the next few hours.  She was especially surprised to see Thom Rainier- she hadn’t known he was back from the Deep Roads.  He told her of his travels with Nathaniel and Connor- they had found the thaig they needed and searched it thoroughly, bringing back anything they could find.  When they returned, they gave everything they had to Elissa.  Thom was hopeful that they were on the right track and was waiting to see if there were any more missions to help find the cure.

                   Everyone asked after Charlotte of course, and Evelyn was happy to talk all about her.  She missed her little girl desperately, but given the climate here, and the troubles that Evelyn was anticipating with these Orlesian women pursuing Cullen, she was glad Charlotte was safe at home.  She spent most of the day visiting with her friends before she went to find Dorian again.  They had made a date to sit and catch up longer and she didn’t want to miss it.  As she was walking over to where Dorian was sitting, she saw Cullen standing with a few Inquisition soldiers in a courtyard near a Gazebo.  Leliana was also close by.  She spent a few minutes telling him about meeting everyone and asked there had been any trouble.  Cullen had been in some meetings and had spent time visiting with Leliana and Josephine, so there had been no real chance of trouble yet.  As they were talking, Leliana approached with some interesting news.

                   Before they had moved back to Honnleath, Leliana had found the name of the family whom Charlotte had been promised to.  Evelyn wrote the family and informed them that there would be no arrangement and that Charlotte would not be marrying into their family, which judging from the letter they received back, did not go over well.  Leliana told them that there had been more letters that had been delivered to Skyhold from this family, and they were getting more threatening.  The last letter threatened to come and take her so she could be raised properly.

                   Evelyn felt Cullen’s hands tighten on her shoulders as she recoiled in horror.  She had to admit she was concerned. It was one thing get out of her own arranged marriage- she had the protection of the Inquisition and her close friends to help her through.  If the Inquisition was disbanded at this council, she and Cullen would be on their own.  Would they be able to protect their daughter if they tried to forcibly take her? 

                   Leliana put her hand on Evelyn’s arm.  “They can try, but the contract can’t be upheld.  It was done without your consent, and they will never be able to find anyone to enforce it.  Even when the time comes, no one will be foolish enough to go against the Inquisitor, Commander and a group of over-protective Templars.  From what I hear, Charlotte has quite a few doting uncles and grandfathers among that group already.”

                   Cullen nodded.  “Don’t worry Evie- they won’t get past me.”  He entwined his fingers in her and brought her hand to his lips.  “She’s not allowed to court until she’s thirty,” he joked.  Cullen adored his little girl- she held his heart in her little hand from the first time she sprawled sleeping across his chest.  Every giggle and belly laugh was music to his ears.  He always made sure that he was home in time for dinner so he could help feed her, give her a bath and then rock her to sleep after Evelyn nursed her.  At first, it had felt odd to have evenings free to be with his family, but he had grown to cherish that time more than anything he had ever done. 

                   When they had finished their conversation, Evelyn continued on to find Dorian.  They sat together on a bench, catching each other up on their lives.  “Dorian, you need to come visit.  I want Charlotte to know you- you are her Godfather after all.”  She tried to be jovial about it, but the conversations with Leliana and Josephine were weighing on her heavily.

                   Dorian looked at her closely for a moment.  “Spit it out Cousin- what’s bothering you?”    

                   Evelyn looked down at her clasped hands and told him everything that had been happening. “I finally have a peaceful life- everything I’ve ever wanted- everything Cullen has ever wanted.  The nightmares have gone, Cullen hasn’t had any episodes in months.   You haven’t seen anything as adorable as when he spends time with Charlotte.  And now, my mark keeps cramping up, people are trying to steal my husband, and that awful Orlesian family is trying to take my daughter.  Why can’t people just let us be?”

                   Dorian was silent.  When he had left Skyhold, he had left with the comfort that Evelyn was going to have a good life.  Ever since she had told him her story on the balcony all those months ago, he had felt protective of her.  He had watched over her, been there through everything.  If it hadn’t had been for his father and Maevaris, he would still be watching over her.  Funny- the Father that Evelyn had encouraged him to reconcile with was the reason he wasn’t by her side now. 

                   He took Evelyn’s hand in his.  She shouldn’t be burdened with all of this at this time.  The Council was breathing down her neck and what was this about the anchor?  “Well, Darling, let’s take this one at a time.  First- Cullen.  You know we’ll all watch out, and he’s not exactly helpless.   He handled himself well enough the last time we were here.  Just play the game and don’t let them see you get rattled.”

                   “Next, Charlotte.  Leliana has already covered that.  Even if they were foolish enough to try to take her, she is one well protected little lady.  And if the worst were to happen, you have a Tevinter magister, the Kirkwall Viscount, Bull’s Chargers, Divine Victoria, King Alistair and Queen Elissa, and Empress Celene on your side.  Do you think they stand a chance?”  Evelyn laughed. 

                   “I suppose you’re right on that one Dorian,” she said.  “I guess that I am overreacting.  I guess I’ve been spoiled by the lack of intrigue and action over the last year that I’m resenting being thrown back into the mix.”

                   “Now third- what is this about the anchor?” Dorian asked, taking her arm in his hands and studying it closely.  Evelyn described what happened during their travels.  It had happened a few times since then- cramping suddenly before stopping.  He ran his hands over her arm, feeling nothing different.  “Your mark is unprecedented- I’m not going to find anything by research.  I take it you’ve heard nothing from Solas?”

                   Evelyn sighed and shook her head.  “No sightings, no word.  Nothing,” she said sorrowfully.  She fingered the chain around her neck.  When they had cleared Solas’ desk to make room for Alistair, Evelyn had found a wolfs tooth- she had it made into a pendant and wore it all the time. 

                   “That’s a damn shame.  If anyone would know, it would be him.  I don’t want to alarm you Cousin, but we need to figure this out.  It almost killed you when you first got it, from what I understand, and Solas kept that from happening.  Now there are no more rifts to close, no way to control the anchor.  I fear it will get worse,” Dorian said.  He stood up quickly and started pacing.  He had to find a way to help her.

                   “Evie,” Evelyn and Dorian both turned to see Cullen standing there.  He had obviously been listening.  “Dorian, please say something can be done.  I don’t want to lose her.  Charlotte can’t lose her.”  Evelyn got up and walked over the Cullen and let him put his arms around her. 

                   “I’ll do everything I can Cullen- you know that,” Dorian said.  “I’ll consult with Madame Vivienne right away.  I don’t want to lose her either.”  He patted Cullen on the shoulder, trying his best to look confident before leaving to find Vivienne.

                   Cullen held Evelyn tightly to him. “How am I supposed to let you out of my sight now?” he said quietly.  “I wish we could just go home.”  They stood quietly for a while.

                   “Let’s get through this council and then we can figure this out,” Evelyn said.  “Fiona is still at Skyhold, and Dorian and Vivienne are talking about it already.  Come on love.  Let’s go to the tavern for a bit and look at Bull’s dragon skull.”  She took him by the hand and led him on.

                   After admiring the skull, Cullen went back to the gazebo to talk to Leliana and Evelyn stayed behind for a few games of Wicked Grace.  It was getting close to dinner time, so Evelyn begged off to find Cullen.  She walked back to the gazebo area to find Cullen petting a Mabari and throwing a stick.

                   Cullen looked up grinning. “He’d been abandoned- I can’t leave another Ferelden here by himself.”  The dog barked and wriggled itself in an attempt to play.

                   “Why do I have the feeling that our family has grown by one?” Evelyn asked, smiling.  She patted the hound who barked happily.  “Well…dog… I hope you get along with cats.”  The dog barked again.  “What are you going call him?”

                   “Well, hopefully, I can come up with something better than PeeWee.” Cullen joked.  “Right?” he asked the dog.  The dog recoiled and whined.  Cullen looked the dog over- he was massive- probably the largest Mabari he had ever seen.  He’d always wanted one.  “Maximus”, he finally said and received a happy bark in return.

                   Evelyn laughed.  “Maximus it is then.  It’s perfect.”  She put her arms around Cullen and kissed him on the cheek.  “Shall we go get some dinner?” 

                   After dinner that evening, they went back to the Tavern to meet up with everyone again.  Evelyn smiled to herself as she sat at the table- aside from the location, it was almost like old times.  She fingered her necklace again, wishing Solas was there as well.  They told stories into the night, reminiscing about some of their more memorable fights. After a while, Evelyn decided to turn in for the evening.  The Council was starting tomorrow and she needed to get some rest.

                   As she headed back to their rooms, she stopped as she overheard two women talking. “The Council starts tomorrow, so she’ll be busy all day.” This caught Evelyn’s interest and she ducked behind a hedge to listen in.

                   “I’ve heard she completely ignores him.  When they still lived at Skyhold, she would be gone for weeks at a time with other men, leaving that delicious man behind,” said the first woman, “Now that they’ve moved away, he works his fingers to the bone while she sits around all day.”

                   “Oh, poor Commander.  Someone told me she got pregnant on purpose, just to trap him.  He had started showing interest in someone else and she wanted to keep him for herself,” said the other woman.  “The Inquisitor,” she spat. “She sent my dear friends away after stripping them of everything they owned, just because their son spurned her all those years ago.  We really need to find the Commander and get him away from her Francine.”

                   “Just this afternoon, she was sitting in the tavern with that awful Qunari, and then she was sitting, brazenly, holding another man’s hands in broad daylight.  The Commander walked in and saw them, but she must have fooled him into thinking it was something else- they were quite cozy at dinner,” said the woman named Francine.  “Monette, we must find out if he will be attending the Council meeting.  If we get him when he’s being ignored by her, he’ll be more willing to leave her.”

                   Evelyn shook her head.  These women were insane.  “What if he does attend the Council?” Monette asked.  “What will we do then?  I want to get him away from her so badly.”

                   “Patience Monette,” said Francine. “We have plenty of time. Now- I understand that he is in the Tavern.  Let’s go over and see if we can catch him.” The ladies got up to leave, and grinning, Evelyn snuck behind them.  This she had to see.

 


	51. Chapter Fifty-One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trepasser continued. I'm not a fan of Orlais and the Orlesian people, as you may be able to tell. They remind me of the Capital in the Hunger Games.

Chapter Fifty-One

                   Cullen was getting ready to leave the Tavern when he was approached by the two ladies.  Francine approached him, hips swaying obviously under the large skirts she was wearing.  “Commander, what brings you our here this evening?” she asked him, looking up into his eyes from behind her mask. Monette giggled behind her.

                   “Visiting with my friends, and now I’m going to bed for the evening,” he replied, bypassing the ladies and moving on.  “I wish you both a pleasant evening.”

                   “But Commander, we were hoping we could interest you into sharing a drink with us.”  Monette simpered, running a hand up his arm.  “You like you could use some time to…relax.”

                   Cullen ground his teeth impatiently. “No thank you, ladies.  Contrary to rumor, I’m a happily married man.  I would appreciate it if you would leave me be.  I have no interest in anyone other than my wife and my family.  Good evening.”  He pushed their way past them and continued to their rooms.

                   After he left, Francine and Monette huffed irritably.  “What do we do now Francine?”  

                   Francine shook her head.  “He can’t possibly be happy with her.  She’s such a plain thing- no wonder she got pregnant on purpose.  We’ll just have to step up our game.”  She held up a vial with a clear potion in it.  From behind the hedge, Evelyn’s eyes narrowed.  It was one thing to make a play for Cullen- but drugging him?  That went too far.  She slipped away to head back to their rooms.

                   Cullen turned around as Evelyn entered the room.  “Evie, where have you been?  You left before me. Is everything all right?”   Evelyn told him what she had overheard on her way back to the room and how she followed the ladies and saw them trying to get Cullen to have a drink with them.

                   “After you left, the one named Francine held up a vial with something in it.  You need to be careful love,” she said.  “I don’t know what was in it, but I’m guessing they plan to drug you and carry you off.”  Cullen’s jaw tightened.

                   “What is wrong with these women?” he muttered.  “I told them I’m happily married- what more will convince them to leave me alone?  To leave us alone?”  Evelyn put her arms around him.  She was upset for him.  It was one thing to make a play for him, but it was another to even thinking about harming him, just so they could get their way.   Cullen sighed.  “Let’s go to bed- we have a long day tomorrow.”   

                   Evelyn stopped him, whispering in his ear,” Or… we could have loud and fabulous sex right here.  You know they’re out there listening…”  Cullen chuckled and put his arms around her as she started nibbling on his ear.

                   The next day, Evelyn was in attendance at the Council listening to Teagan drone on and on.  Honestly, she knew for a fact that Alistair was not concerned over the Inquisition presence- he had written a letter to her and Cullen and sent it along with Leliana before they left for Halamshiral.  Teagan was young when Ferelden had been at war with Orlais, and remembered the occupation- and was paranoid about it happening again.  Alistair apologized for him, but he had to let Teagan have his say.  If Evelyn decided that the Inquisition was still needed, she would have no trouble from Alistair about it.  Alistair knew that Evelyn was ready to disband the Inquisition, but she wanted to make sure that everything and everyone had been taken care of first. She was interrupted from her thoughts on Alistair’s letter by an elf urging her to come see Leliana right away.  Her hand had been beginning to ache abominably, so she was relieved to be able to step away.  Until she saw the dead Qunari warrior. 

                   In the meantime, Cullen was standing out by the gazebo working with Maximus when the two Orlesian ladies, Francine and Monette entered the garden area and seated themselves near him.  After listening to their simpering and giggling for an hour, he was ready to go hide in his rooms, but he knew that he was going to have to deal with this eventually.  He continued to ignore the two women, concentrating on the dog and on their training.  Maximus had not been trained very well- luckily he was a very smart dog, and caught on quickly.  Cullen wondered how he would be around Charlotte and PeeWee- a thought that had crossed his mind already.  He knew that Mabari were fiercely loyal and intelligent, and he had no doubts that Maximus would quickly grow protective of Charlotte, but he determined that a slow introduction would be safest.  Cullen wasn’t worried about PeeWee- he was sure that those two would work things out somehow.  He was kneeling down rubbing the dog’s belly when he felt a tap on his shoulder.  He could hear the rustle of skirts and looked up to see Francine standing over him with a soppy slavish look on her face- at least what he could see around the mask.   “Commander, we would like to speak to you, my friend and I.  My name is Francine DuBarry and this is Monette DuPuis and we are concerned for your welfare.  Are you aware that your wife just went into one of those horrible mirrors with that Qunari, the man she was holding hands with yesterday, and a dwarf?”

                   Cullen looked at them sharply.  He had heard the ruckus about the dead warrior and knew that Evelyn had gone to look into it- but this was the first he had heard about an Eluvian.  He’d have to catch Leliana later and find out more.

                   Monette spoke up.  “How horrible.  How can she run around on you like that?  With those awful men?  Poor, poor Commander. You really should not be ignored the way you are by her.  Everyone knows that she trapped you into marriage- it’s all anyone is talking about.  You know, while you are here in Orlais, you could get it annulled.  I know you are friends with Divine Victoria- I’m sure she would be glad…”

                   Cullen put his hand up to make her stop speaking.  “Stop.  Just, stop.  I don’t know where you got your information from, but the Inquisitor did not trap me into marriage.  Quite frankly, I’m appalled to hear that people are gossiping, not only about the woman I love- the woman who saved the world, but also about her friends- the ones who helped her save the world.  The men she is with right now, the Iron Bull, Dorian Pavus and Varric Tethras are some of her dearest friends and have been there with her fighting against Corypheus, the Red Templars, the Venatori, the rifts, the red lyrium, and you have the audacity to badmouth them?”

                   Both ladies stared at him, shocked.  Cullen continued, “I’ll thank you to leave me and my wife alone.  Do not approach me, and do not approach her.  This council is putting enough strain on her, and she has had enough strife to last a lifetime.  She does not need to be hearing petty rumors and gossip-mongering from the likes of you.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I feel the need to find some fresh air.”  Maximus rolled over and stood up, lifting a leg against Monette’s skirt before taking off after his master, leaving the ladies exclaiming in disgust.

                   As Cullen made his way towards the tavern, he found Leliana and got all of the details from her.  Just like old times, he waited for his Evie to return, hoping she would stay safe.  As the remaining companions waited for their return at the tavern, Cullen talked quietly with Leliana about his troubles with the Orlesian ladies.  “Honestly, I don’t understand how these people can spend their time gossiping about the person who saved their very existence.  I know Evie overheard them yesterday, and she told me that they are planning on trying to drug me as a last resort.  I know that hearing the things they were saying about her bothered her, but she’s trying not to dwell on it.  I’m angry for her.  It took her so long to gain any self-confidence and these petty women are going to destroy it.”

                   Leliana shook her head. “I’ve heard some similar stories as well.  I think the Inquisitor is strong enough to ignore it- she’s come a long way.  Plus, she now has other things to distract her right now, and I have a feeling that something big is on the horizon.  I’m more concerned for you.  Drugs in the hand of ladies like that can get unwittingly dangerous- they could dose you thinking to knock you out and end up killing you.  I’ll check around and see what I can come up with for you.  In the meantime- make sure you know the source of anything you eat or drink.”  Cullen ground his teeth and clenched his fist in frustration.  Leliana patted him on the shoulder.  “Don’t worry Commander.  We can always let Sera take care of them.”

                   The next morning, Evelyn came stumbling into the room, exhausted and holding her arm in pain.  She told Cullen what had happened, and the development with the Anchor- she could now use it in different ways- it was evolving all after all this time.  They were both quiet for a while, considering the ramifications of this development.  “We’ll have to meet with Josephine and Leliana soon,” Evelyn said, “I’m sure Josephine is not very pleased with me at the moment.  I need a bath, and I need to rest a while before that happens, though.”

                   Cullen got up and helped her with her bath, scrubbing her back and rubbing the tension out of her neck and shoulders and then slid into bed with her again, holding her as she slept.  He couldn’t stop thinking about the Anchor.  He made a mental note to find Dorian to see if he had found anything, but he had a feeling that the answer was going to be a resounding no.  He thought about their lives over the last few years-they had gone from having quiet crushes on each other to friends to lovers over time and he wasn’t ready to lose her yet.  In fact, he had been hoping that they might try for another baby after the council was over and they could go back to their quiet life.  If she made it through this, and she got pregnant again, he swore to the Maker right then and there that she could have as many cookies as she wanted.

                   After Evelyn had gotten a few hours of rest, they met with Josephine and Leliana.  Evelyn was right, Josephine was very upset that she had left the Council- not that Evelyn had much choice in the matter.  She had to go back through the Eluvian to find out more about the Qunari and what they were doing.  She got Blackwall, Bull, and Dorian together and they headed back out.

                   Cullen, Leliana, and Josephine continued to meet while they were waiting, which relieved Cullen greatly as he would rather be holed up in meetings than out where those women were. As the dinner hour approached, they left the meeting room to meet up with their friends.  “Don’t look now Commander, but I believe your harem has not only arrived but is growing,” Leliana said.  He heard the cooing and giggling already and groaned.  There were now four women gathered at the entrance, pointing at Cullen and exclaiming. 

                   “Maker’s Breath, I think I’ve lost my appetite,” Cullen muttered getting up to leave.  As he was getting up, Evelyn and her companions came in, disheveled and covered in scrapes and burns.  Cullen pulled Evelyn into a hug and asked her if she was all right, bringing her over to sit down, completely forgetting the women who were glaring daggers at Evelyn. 

                   “Thanks, Love,” Evelyn said to Cullen as he pulled the bench out.  She sat down, sliding in the middle to make room for both her and Varric.  Bull and Dorian sat down across from them and they began to quietly talk about where they had been.  While they were talking, Leliana had a quick word with the proprietor of the tavern, making it clear that if meals given to anyone in the Inquisition were found to be tampered with, that the repercussions would be severe.  He nodded and saw to their plates himself, much to the disappointment of the ladies at the next table.  One of them had bribed him and saw she was out the gold she had paid. 

                   As they ate, they talked more about what had been found- Bull and Dorian did more of the talking while Evelyn sat quietly.  Cullen could tell that she had things on her mind that she didn’t want to talk about here- he saw Bull noticing too- he kept shooting glances her way.  After they finished eating, a few more people gathered around for a few hands of Wicked Grace. Evelyn was tired, but she knew her time with her friends was short and she wanted to make the most of her time with them, so she stayed to play as well.  It was the most comfortable she had felt since she had arrived.  It felt good to be joking with everyone, Cullen’s arm around her waist bringing her to lean into him as they played.  Evelyn good-naturedly accused him of trying to look at her cards, which he did not disagree with.  She noticed that the women had not moved from their table, and kept shooting dirty looks in her directions, but she forgot about them as she spent time with her friends.  Finally, she and Cullen got up to go to bed after arranging to meet Leliana and Josephine in the morning to discuss what had been found out about the Dragon’s Breath and the Qun.

                   After they reached their room, there was a knock at the door.  Evelyn opened it to find Bull standing there.  He came in and the three of them sat down.  Bull looked at Evelyn expectantly.  “Come on Boss, I’ve been around you long enough to know somethings on your mind. Now, talk.” 

                   Evelyn hesitated for a moment.  “Nothing’s wrong really.  I’ve found a few notes here and there that leads me to think we’re going to see Solas.  I have nothing concrete, but I just have a feeling.  I just don’t know how I feel about it.”

                   Bull grunted.  “What else?”

                   Evelyn looked at him.  He was too good at his job.  “I noticed the number of lady admirers has grown, and they are brazen.  The things they have been saying- the rumors they’ve been spreading.  I should be above it, but I have to admit that it hurts a little.”  Evelyn had to admit that the more time she spent there, the less she liked Orlais.  It was beautiful land, but the people were so petty and cruel and had no concept of reality.

                    Cullen shook his head.  “I was afraid of this.  These blasted women won’t leave me alone and now they are hurting you too.”  He was disgusted at what was going on.   Evelyn never expected people to fall at her feet in gratitude, and was often embarrassed at the accolades that were handed her way, but these people seemed to be forgetting everything she did.  Teagan was treating her like a criminal, Orlais was treating her like a puppet, and these women were treating her like she had no feelings whatsoever.

                   Bull looked at Evelyn.  “You know Boss, I can lay some groundwork that would make these women leave you alone.”

                   “No Bull.  I don’t want anything bad to happen that could possibly put the Inquisition in a bad light.  Even though Cullen and I have stepped away, if the decision is made to keep the Inquisition going, I don’t want to have anything hanging over our heads.  These women have been very public with their intentions and if anything were to happen to them, everyone would know who did it, even if there was no proof.”  She thought about it a while. “We just need to get through this Council.  Then Cullen and I can go home to our family and be done with it.”

                   “Well, the offer will stand in the meantime.  I know Leliana spoke with the Tavern owner for tonight’s meal, but we’ll need to come up with another solution for the rest of this council.  We don’t need a dead Commander because of these fool women.” Bull said, getting up to leave.

                   Evelyn paled.  She was the one who had told Cullen about the drugging, but it hadn’t occurred to her that it could kill him.  She stood up angrily, making to head for the door.  “Whoa Boss, I know where you think you’re going, but you can’t.”

                   “Step aside Bull- I’m going to have a word with those women.  I can’t say whether or not fists may be involved.”  She pushed at Bull to get out of her way.

                   “Evie, you can’t confront them.  The Inquisitor getting upset over a bunch of silly women?  As Josephine would say, we need to keep up appearances.  I can handle this- I’ll watch where my food and drink comes from, and I’ll avoid the women like the plague itself.” Cullen said, running his hands up and down her arms, trying to soothe her tense muscles.

                   Evelyn huffed angrily.  “Fine,” she said. “But if something happens, and you are harmed, I will take it out on them personally.”   She looked at Maximus, who was sitting quietly by watching the exchange.  “You stay with him at all times.”  Maximus barked, wagging his stump of a tail. She swiped her hands over her eyes angrily and flopped back onto the couch. 

                   Bull nodded and left as Cullen sat down next to Evelyn and put his arms around her.  “Come on, Love,” he said soothingly, “Bath and bed.  I’ll join you in both.”

                   The next morning, Evelyn and the others were meeting regarding what Evelyn found about the lyrium mine they destroyed and the Dragon’s Breath.  As they were meeting, Teagan and Cyril de Montfort came down again, Teagan hurling accusations at Evelyn about the intention of the Inquisition.  Cullen sighed- he was going too far.  He decided later that day to write a note to Alistair asking him to get his representative under control- his accusations against Evelyn were uncalled for.

               Evelyn did have to deal with the problem the men brought up- the situation between the servant and the Inquisition soldier. When she arrived and saw what was going on, she chose to take her guard into custody, thinking back to last night’s conversation about appearances.  After talking with Leliana, she gathered Bull, Cole, and Vivienne and headed back to the Eluvian while Leliana took care of the Gaatlock barrels, promising to meet again when Evelyn got back.


	52. Chapter Fifty-Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuing on. I am not a Solasmancer and I never plan to be, but I really like his character and I always try to max out approval with him as best I can. I thought about extending the conversation to include more personal things, but I couldn't really come up with a good way to do it in the context of everything else- you know. "I'm going to destroy the world" "Hey- did I tell you I got married and had a kid?" Just couldn't make it work...

Chapter Fifty-Two

                   When Evelyn returned from her trip through the Eluvian, it was not with good news. Leliana did not have good news either as she found out when they met again.  Gaatlock barrels had been placed all over- Denerim, Orlais, the Free Marches and the Qunari were going to strike, bringing down every noble house they could.  Evelyn told them about the Viddasala, knowing she had to get to the Davaraad as soon as she could to finish this. Her arm was starting to cramp again, as Josephine took them to task for covering up the dead warrior and taking control of the Winter Palace. 

                   She flexed her hand as she thought.  They were being betrayed from within, repeating history Evelyn had learned as a child- the larger the organization, the better the chance of corruption from within.  As Josephine mentioned that perhaps it would be better to disband the Inquisition, her arm seized up, the anchor flaring out of control.  Her advisors gathered around her in concern.

                   “So…it’s been getting worse,” Evelyn admitted.  “I don’t know why.  I don’t know how to stop it.  I…don’t know how much time I’ve got left.  What I do know, is that the Qunari need to be stopped.  So I need to get to the Davaraad while I can still fight.”  Cullen approached her, anguish etched on his face as he pulled her into his arms.  Evelyn told them to tell the Council and headed off to the Eluvian again, exhausted as she was, bring Bull, Thom, and Dorian with her. 

                   When they found the Dragon, Evelyn didn’t know what to think.  She was even more shocked when the Viddasala tried to get Bull to turn against her, taking a moment to put a hand on his shoulder when the fighting was done.  “Don’t worry about it Boss.  I’m in a good place with it,” was all he said about it.  As they fought their way to the dragon, Evelyn wasn’t sure what she wanted to do.  They had killed so many dragons, but this one had been tortured- she just couldn’t bring herself to kill this one.  As the others fought against the Qunari, Evelyn found a way to free the dragon, watching it take off into the skies.

                   As they ran to the Eluvian, it was then that Evelyn found out about Solas.  The Viddasala told them about what he had done.  She didn’t want to believe it- her dear friend.  The Viddasala had to be wrong.  As the Qunari mage went through the mirror, the anchor flared again, sending Evelyn to the ground in pain.  Blackwall helped her to stand and she watched the rest of the Qunari go through the Eluvian to kill Solas.  She walked up to the mirror and looked at it.  “Whatever else, Solas was one of us.  I won’t leave him for Viddasala.”  And with a determined look, she and her companions entered the mirror.

                   They fought their way through, the anchor purging itself- forcing Evelyn to keep everyone back. “We need to find Solas and get this fixed, Boss,” Bull said.  “It’s going to kill you otherwise.”  Everyone looked grim as Evelyn struggled with her arm.  She thought of her friends, her husband, and her daughter.  She wanted to stay for them, the thought of being without them forcing her on through the mirrors.

                   Finally, Evelyn and the others reached the last mirror and went through.  When Evelyn reached the other side, she realized her friends weren’t with her, and she gasped as she came upon a stone Qunari in front of her.  She walked slowly through a maze of statues, she heard Solas speaking.  Letting out a breath, she ran towards them to see the Viddasala raise her spear to throw it at him, and then saw her turn to stone. 

                   She saw Solas as he started walking towards the Eluvian and managed to sob out a soft “Solas,” making him stop.  As he turned to face her, the Anchor flared, causing Evelyn to fall on her knees in pain.  Then suddenly, the pain stopped.  Evelyn looked questioningly at her arm, and then at Solas. 

                   Her heart rose at the kindness in his voice.  “That should give us more time,” he said as he looked warmly at her. “I suspect you have questions.”  They talked for a long time about Fen’Harel, his role in forming the veil and how it took everything from the Elves.  She took his hand as they spoke, not wanting to let him go.  He told her about the Evanuris and how he punished them for killing Mythal.  They talked about the Inquisition and the corruption from within, how it was inevitable. Finally, he told her of his plan to bring the Elves back, ending the world as they knew it.

                   Evelyn felt tears of betrayal run down her cheeks.  He wanted to end their world. “Why bother stopping the Qun if you’re going to destroy the world anyway?” she said angrily.  He explained that he wanted the people to live out their last years in comfort- not under the Qun, so he had exposed their plot to her so she could stop it.  She sat quietly for a while. “There’s still the matter of the anchor.  It’s getting worse.”

                   She could see the regret in Solas’ eyes as he looked away from her.  “Yes,” he replied, “I’m sorry.  And we are almost out of time.”  The anchor flared again, Evelyn crying out in pain.  “The Mark will eventually kill you.  Drawing you here gave me the chance to save you…at least, for now.” He knelt beside her as he spoke, noticing the chain with the wolf’s tooth around her neck and fingering it sadly.

                   In her pain, Evelyn spoke.  “You don’t need to destroy this world.  I’ll prove it to you.”

                   Sadly, Solas stood up. “I would treasure the chance to be wrong once again, my friend, ” he said. “Take my hand.”  Evelyn put her hand in his.  “I’m sorry,” he whispered as he covered the Mark with his hand.  He struck down against the Mark, kissed her one last time on the forehead in farewell,  and then let her go.  “Live well, while time remains”.

                   Evelyn called out to him as he walked away from her, the pain increasing as the mark burned her arm away.  She got up, staggering to the Eluvian, trying to follow her friend.  When she went through the Eluvian, she found herself back at the Winter Palace, Bull, Tho, and Dorian looking around confused as she fell through the mirror, screaming in pain.

                   Bull caught her and helped her to the ground, watching in horror as her arm dissolved away slowly.  Dorian took her from Bull and watched helplessly as the green light blazed around her, Evelyn crying and writhing.  As Thom went to get help, they stared helplessly- her arm now dissolved almost to the elbow.  Dorian and Bull looked at each other, unsure of what to do.  They didn’t want to carry her across the grounds like this, but they couldn’t leave her here either.  Cullen burst into the room shouting her name and falling to his knees next to her, taking her good hand in his.

                   “Evie, be strong. Stay with me.  Maker, please help her.” Cullen cried as he held her.  As they watched, the Mark finally burned out, leaving a cauterized stump of an arm in its place.  As the Anchor died out, Dorian gently took her arm in his hands and ran a healing light over what was left, feeling Evelyn relax as the pain went away.  She stared down at her arm, unsure how to react to the fact that her hand was missing.  Cullen took her in his arms as she cried over her the shock of her missing arm, and for her lost friend.

                   A few hours later, Cullen had Evelyn sequestered in their rooms with Dorian and Vivienne watching over her as Josephine told the Council that they needed some time as the Inquisitor had been gravely injured when she defeated the Qunari and saved the world again. Evelyn lay curled up in bed, staring silently at the wall.  She felt completely drained, even as Cullen curled up beside her.  They didn’t speak- just lay together quietly.  After she fell asleep, Cullen got up and went to find Josephine and Leliana.  “I haven’t been able to find anything out about her conversation with Solas,” Cullen said, “The others have told me about everything that led up to it- the Qunari, the dragon, the trouble with the anchor.  From what I understand, it got way worse as they moved on.  I’m not sure what to do right now- she won’t speak at all.  I don’t know why.”

                   “She has been through much, Commander,” Josephine said.  “And now she’s lost her arm.  Evelyn has come through everything that has been thrown at her.  I think we should give her some time.”

                   Leliana sighed.  “I wish we could, but we can’t hold the Council off forever. We will need a decision.”

                   Cullen shook his head.  “I’ll see how she is in the morning before making any decisions.  She is hurting right now, mentally and physically, but she’s level-headed and she’s been resilient.  I’m worried that after everything, this may be a breaking point.”  Leliana put her hand on his shoulder and smiled encouragingly. 

                   “Go to her Cullen.  You need to be with her, not us.”  Cullen nodded and left.

                   When he returned, he looked at Dorian questioningly.  Dorian shook his head- no change.  “Why don’t you and Lady Vivienne get some rest?  I’ll be all right with her.”  Vivienne bowed slightly and left, but Dorian stood resolute. 

                   “I can’t leave her.  I want to spend as much time with her as I can.”  He looked at Evelyn, who was still asleep.  “I haven’t had a chance to tell her yet that I have to go back.  My father was murdered,” he said in a hushed voice.  “It’s the hardest thing I’ve had to do- leaving her and Bull behind.  Please let me stay.”

                   Cullen nodded.  “Of course.”  Cullen sat on the couch with his head in his hands.  “There have been so many times I’ve felt helpless when it comes to her.  This isn’t much different.  I’m not sure what is keeping her silent- if it’s losing Solas again, or her arm.  I’m hoping she’ll talk in the morning.”

                   Dorian nodded. “I hope so too.  Why don’t you get some rest, Cullen?  I’ll sleep on the couch.”

                   The next morning, Evelyn awoke with a start, sitting up frantically.  Cullen awoke to find Evelyn staring at her arm in horror.  She looked at him.  “It wasn’t a dream?”

                   Dorian came over and sat on the bed as Cullen put his arm around her.  “No love, it wasn’t a dream.”  He sat up and drew Evelyn into his side.  “How are you feeling?”

                   Evelyn was quiet for a while.  “My arm…”, she said, her eyes tearing up.  “What do I do without my arm?”  She sat up as the realization hit her. “How do I fight?  How do I take care of myself?  How do I take care of Charlotte?”  She looked at Cullen desperately.  He hushed her, holding her close.

                   “We’ll figure it out, love.  I know it won’t be easy, but we’ll work it out together.  Don’t forget that Ser Geoffrey at the Sanctuary is missing an arm- we’ll talk to him when we get back.  I love you, and that will never change.”  Evelyn nodded and took a deep breath.  Cullen kissed her.  “Why don’t we get you some breakfast, and get you freshened up and we can figure things out from there.”

                   Dorian stood up. “I’ll get some trays for you,” he said as he left the room.  He wanted to update everyone on Evelyn’s condition.  His poor sweet Evelyn- she had come through so much.  He wanted to be sure that she would come through this too.  He couldn’t be there in the future, but he was here now and he wanted to be available for her when she needed him.  He knew Dagna was around and decided to go look for her after he took care of Evelyn.

                   Cullen watched Evelyn as she ate- watching as she would often raise her left hand to grab something, only to stare at it in confusion and put the stump back down.  When she finished, she sat on the bed, not knowing what to say or do.  Cullen sat down on the bed across from her and took her hand.  She looked at him sadly.  “My wedding ring…” she whispered.  She didn’t know what happened to it- if it had fallen off before she fell through the Eluvian or after and she felt horrible that she had lost this precious piece of her life.  Cullen promised to go back to where the Eluvian was to see if it was there.  If had fallen off before, he didn’t think he would be able to find it.  “Even if I have it, how would I wear it?” she cried, as she sobbed in Cullen’s arms.  He took her right hand, rubbing his thumb and finger over her ring finger on that hand. 

                   “It’s not about the ring, love,” Cullen said. “If we can’t find it, I’ll get you another one and marry you again, just so I can put it on your finger again.”  They sat on the bed holding each other for a while.  “I know you’re hurting right now, but I’m overjoyed that you survived.  I can’t imagine this life without you.” 

                   “Do you want to clean up and get dressed?” he asked her after a while.  She nodded.  He got up to help her, doing well until it came time to getting her shirt on.  They both stared at the sleeve hanging over her stump silently.  Cullen smiled and rolled up the sleeve a little- cuffing it.  “It’s how Ser Geoffrey does it- didn’t you notice?”

                   “I guess I never paid attention,” Evelyn responded.  She thought about what she knew about Ser Geoffrey.  He was always busy, always working on something, and he didn’t let his missing arm stop him.  She knew that it was going to take her some getting used to, and she still needed some time to mourn, but she knew that in the end, she would be all right.  She looked at the rolled up sleeve self-consciously.  “Thank you, Cullen.”

                   He smiled.  “Do you want to go out?” he asked her gently.  “Are you ready to talk to Josephine and Leliana, or should they come here?  I don’t want to push you, but we only have a few days until the Council reconvenes.  Can you talk about your meeting with Solas?”

                   Evelyn felt herself tear up.  Solas. She had missed him and waited for him to come back.  She had wanted to tell him about Charlotte, and getting married and Alistair and Elissa, and the Sanctuary.  She wanted to hear more of his stories, sit and watch him paint, or make healing potions.  She had wanted her friend back.  “Give me some time Cullen.  I’m not ready to leave the room yet and I need some time to process everything Solas told me.  Is that all right?” 

                   “Of course, it is.  Is there anyone you want to see?”  She looked at her stump again.  She was afraid of the looks she would get, the noises of sympathy, people treating her like a cripple- she didn’t know if she could handle that yet.  Cullen continued, “Dorian will be back soon I think- he stayed the night.  I don’t think I could keep him away if I tried. And you know that Bull won’t be far behind him.  In fact, none of your friends will want to stay away.  They love you.”

                   As he said that, there was a knock at the door.  Cullen went to answer it to find Dorian, Bull, and Varric waiting expectantly.  Dorian walked in and went straight to Evelyn, checking her arm and pronouncing it healed. Evelyn nodded silently at that, pushing the sleeve back down self-consciously.  As Varric came in, he noticed her pushing the sleeve back down.  “Hey, Lady- nothing to be embarrassed about.”  He looked at her more closely.  She looked drawn.  “How are you doing?”

                   “I’m ok Varric,” Evelyn answered.  She didn’t elaborate and Varric decided not to pry. 

                   “So when will you and Curly bring the baby and come check out your new place in Kirkwall, Comtesse?  Maybe play with the chains in the harbor?” he asked her.  Evelyn had shown Cullen what Varric had done for them- but he wasn’t too keen on going back to Kirkwall.

                   “Not sure Varric.  We’ll have to talk about it.  I’d like to come visit you, though, _Viscount_ …” she replied.   She hoped she could talk Cullen into going there one day- she missed Varric and wanted to see what he was up to.  

                   The three men stayed and visited and had Evelyn laughing after a while.  Cullen smiled as she watched Evelyn joking with her friends, happy to see that she wasn’t going to wallow in self-pity.  He knew she wouldn’t anyway- she wasn’t the type. He knew that they had come to draw her out of herself and keep her socializing.  If he knew them, by the end of the visit, they would be encouraging her to come out of her room.  They did try, but she just wasn’t ready yet.  In honesty, if she had been back at Skyhold or Honnleath, she wouldn’t have been as shy about it.  But here in Orlais, people were so ignorant and judgmental.  She had already heard enough cutting remarks about her looks, her outfit, her hair, etc. that she didn’t want to start hearing about her arm too.  She had managed to ignore the comments up until now, even those directed at her in regards to Cullen, but this was going to be too much. Learning to adjust to life with only one arm was bad enough, she didn’t need to hear criticism from the Orlesian people, or condescension either- even though she knew she was going to have to deal with it eventually. 

                   The men decided to leave after a while, but Evelyn felt much better after they left.  Cullen smiled at Evelyn as the men left- noticing she already looked better. “Cullen, I think I’m ready to talk to Josephine and Leliana- tomorrow morning if that’s all right.  Could they come here?”

                   “Of course Evie.  I’ll send a note right away.  Do you need anything?”  He had noticed that there were a few times that she was looking thoughtful as she spoke with her boys, but was hesitant to ask how she was.  He knew she was going to be hearing that all the time for a while and didn’t want to add to it.

                   “No.  I think I just need some time to rest and think.  Why don’t you go to the Tavern for a while?  I need to work some things out.”  She went to hug Cullen and pulled away awkwardly when she realized that she couldn’t hold him as tightly as she once did.  Cullen didn’t let her back away, pulling her in and holding her tightly to him, kissing her deeply.

                   “Don’t ever be afraid to reach out to me Love,” he whispered to her.  “I’ll give you some time.”  After he left, Evelyn sat down in a chair, studying her arm.  She needed to think about what she was going to tell them about Solas, and she needed to come to terms with the loss of her arm, and the loss of what had made her the Inquisitor.  She knew that she was going to be in for a big change- she started mentally going through her normal days, wondering how the lack of an arm would affect it.  Tending Charlotte, cooking dinner, treating the Templars, doing laundry, playing cards.  Everything would have to be adjusted and compensated for if she wanted to keep doing all of those things.

                   She didn’t realize it, but her early life had prepared her for times like this.  She had to learn to depend on herself from an early age- it had given her resilience and self-dependence- she had lived through many things already.  She could handle this-she just needed to learn to ask for help until she figured out how to do things on her own.  She didn’t want to disappoint Cullen, or create more work for him- he was the best thing that had ever happened to her, aside from Charlotte, of course.  And little Charlotte- she needed to be a good role model for her little girl.

                   It was getting to be dinner time when Cullen came in to check on her.  He sat down across from her, a regretful look on his face.  “Evie, I didn’t see your ring by the mirror.  It must have fallen off before you came through the Eluvian. I’m sorry.”  Evelyn exhaled and nodded her head.  “Say the word and I’ll get you a new one,” he said.

                   She ran her thumb thoughtfully over Cullen’s ring.  He rarely took his off. “I think I would, Cullen.  I’m proud to be your wife and I want everyone to know it.”  He squeezed her hand and smiled and promised to get on it right away.  She hesitated.  “Do you want to go to the Tavern for dinner?” she asked shyly.

                   Cullen grinned, stood up and held his arm out to her.  They walked quietly together, Evelyn consciously looking around to see if anyone was watching her.  She saw a few glances her way, but no outward comments, which made her feel a little more comfortable.  There was a general cry of greeting as they reached the Tavern with Sera jumping at Evelyn and wrapping her arms around her neck.  Everyone was relieved the see Evelyn out and about and overjoyed that she had survived the Anchor.  They made room for her and Cullen at the table and placed a mug of ale in front of her.  They sat chatting as they waited for their dinner to come out, Varric presiding over the table telling stories of his time as Viscount in Kirkwall.  When Evelyn’s plate was put in front of her, she hesitated- how was she going to cut her meat?  Cullen noticed her regarding her food, but was reluctant to reach over and cut it for her.  He didn’t want to make her feel like a child.   The tavern owner, who had come to enjoy the company of the companions, noticed the silent problem and whisked her plate away, taking it into the back to cut the meat for her.  He placed it back in front of her, patting her on the back as she smiled with gratitude.   

                   After dinner, Evelyn wanted to take a walk.  Cullen was deep in conversation with Thom, so Dorian offered to walk with her.  They walked arm in arm looking at the statues, enjoying each other’s company.  They sat on a bench quietly for a while.  Finally, Dorian told her about going back to Tevinter, and the murder of his father.  Evelyn sat sadly contemplating this news.  She knew he was going to go back- he didn’t have a choice. “But I have a gift for you Cousin,” as he pulled a crystal out of his pocket, “a sending Crystal.  I have one too.  We can talk whenever we want.  Did you think we would never talk to each other again?  I need to keep up on my Goddaughters antics- I’m sure she is going to be just as much a handful as I am.”  Evelyn hugged Dorian, crying. 

                   “I wish you could stay with me Dorian, but I understand that you have to go,” she sighed.  “This is the hardest part of disbanding the Inquisition- all of my family is moving on to their own lives.”  Evelyn knew that it was going to happen eventually, and she truly hoped that all of her loved ones would settle down to whatever piece of happiness they chose, but she would miss them.  She knew some of them would always be wanderers- Cole, Sera, Bull, Thom, and they would swing by and see her from time to time.  The rest, she would have to make time to see somehow.

                   As they sat, Dorian noticed that Evelyn kept pulling at the sleeve of her missing arm- trying to keep it from being noticeable.  He put his hand on her arm to stop her.  “Don’t, Cousin.  Don’t be embarrassed.  You paid a heavy price to be where you are.  You should be proud.”

                   Evelyn fidgeted a little.  “I think if I were at home, I would be, but people here stare and point.”  She nodded at the masked couple across the way who had been pointing in her direction.  She had overheard a few whispered snide remarks at dinner as well, but did not draw attention to it- she didn’t want to create a scene or an incident.  “I should be prepared for it, or not surprised, but it still stings a little.”

                   “And how do you know they’re not pointing and staring at me?” Dorian asked.  “I am rather handsome you know,”  Evelyn smiled. “Come on Cousin, let’s keep walking.  Back to your room, or back to the Tavern?”

                   “Back to the Tavern, I think.  I’d like to see if Cullen is done hearing all about Thom’s travels.” 

                   They arrived to find Francine and Monette trying to corner Cullen again.  Dorian pulled Evelyn over by a hedge before she was seen- he didn’t want her to cause an incident.  Maximus stood by Cullen’s side, growling slightly as the ladies cooed at Cullen.  “Oh Commander, you look so handsome this evening," said Francine, attempting to run her hand up Cullen’s arm. 

                   Cullen stepped away and looked at the ladies with disgust plain on his face.  “I have asked you repeatedly to leave me alone.  I should be able to walk around without getting harassed by you or any other women.  My wife should be able to walk around without hearing disgusting rumors, or whispered comments like you were making at dinner tonight.  I am being polite simply because I do not wish to cause any incidents that could have lasting effects on the goodwill between Orlais and Ferelden.  I am sure that Empress Celene would be very upset to know that her guests are being subject to such harassment no?”  He walked away shaking his head.

                   The ladies stared after him in dismay as he walked away, Maximus at his heels. They muttered to each other for a while before walking off in a different direction.  Dorian put his finger to his lips and motioned after them.  They followed the ladies quietly listening in on their conversation.  “Monette, I think I know where we keep going wrong.  We keep trying to talk to him when his friends are around.  If he were to come with us in front of those people, they would go tell HER immediately.  He is only saying these things because he is afraid.  We must save him from her clutches.”   

                   “Francine, he is never far away from his friends, and then there is that awful dog.  That dog never leaves his side.  This Council is only going to last a few more days- we must act quickly.  It may be time to get some additional help.”  Monette looked around to see if anyone was listening.  “I believe there is an Antivan Crow here.  I am sure we could hire him to kidnap the Commander,” she whispered loudly.  Dorian and Evelyn looked at each other in disbelief- this was degenerating into a farce, but it gave Dorian an idea.

                   Francine continued talking.  “Fine.  It will cost us a pretty penny, but it will be worth it.  The last thing he needs is to be saddled with a crippled wife the rest of his life,” she spat.  “He may be angry at first, but he will see things our way soon enough.”  They walked off then, but Evelyn had heard enough. 

                   “I don’t know if I should do something about this, or get some popcorn and watch,” she said with grim amusement.  “I wonder who the Crow is- we should go see if Leliana knows.”  Dorian nodded and led the way back to the Tavern.  “Well, if anything, I guess this has gotten my mind off of my troubles,” Evelyn said.  “I should probably thank them for that.”

                   They found Leliana in the Tavern and had her come to Evelyn’s room.  Cullen was already there waiting, looking worried.  As the three of them entered, Cullen looked up concerned.  “Evie, where have you been?”  he asked her as he came across the room towards her.

                   “I was just listening in on an interesting conversation, and we’re hoping Leliana can provide some information.  Your lady admirers are at it again, and they are ramping things up,” Dorian said.  They looked to Leliana.  “Is there an Antivan Crow here that you are aware of?”  Dorian asked her. 

                   Leliana nodded.  “Well, I wouldn’t exactly call him a Crow.  Zevran is here,” she said, blushing a little.  Evelyn caught her blush and grinned. 

                   “Oooooh… Leliana has a boyfriend!” she exclaimed excitedly.  “You are going to spill it later.  I need details!”  She thought for a bit.  “Why hasn’t he been around?  I’d love to see him.”        

                   Leliana, still blushing, said “He only arrived yesterday.  He was nearby and knew I was here.  We’ve been…catching up,” she said.  “If there were any real Crows here, he wouldn’t be.  They must have seen him.”

                   Dorian thought for a while.  “Do you think Zevran would be willing to play along with this for a while?  I think this would be something right up his alley.”  He outlined his thoughts on how to take care of these women without causing any incidents- a plan that had them all laughing. 

                   Leliana thought about it for a moment.  “Well, he hasn’t been seen with any members of the Inquisition as of yet, so he won’t be associated with this. I’ll talk to him about it, but I think he would love to play along.  I’ll let you know in the morning when we meet.”  She left to talk to Zevran.

                   After she left, Dorian gave Evelyn a hug and left to go find Bull.  Closing the door behind him, Evelyn felt Cullen wrapping his arms around her waist from behind before he started nuzzling her neck.  Evelyn stiffened.  Even though Cullen had helped her bathe and dress this morning, being intimate with him was another matter.  Cullen felt her hesitate and turned her around to face him.  “Are you not ready my love?” he said as he caressed her cheek. 

                   She looked down, embarrassed.   Even though it seemed like longer, she had only lost her arm the day before and she was still adjusting to it.  She had mentally gone through all of her usual daily chores, but hadn’t thought about what would happen when she was with Cullen.  She knew better now than to worry about how she looked- he had made it clear that he found her beautiful- whether it was when she got back all sweaty and disheveled from the Exalted Plains, was nine months pregnant, or missing an appendage she supposed.  But what if it interfered with her pleasing him? She was still riddled with self-consciousness over it.  “It’s all right,” Cullen said.  “You tell me when you’re ready.  I can wait.”  He kissed her and drew her into his arms. 

                   Evelyn went to sit down, looking dejected.  He came and sat down next to her, taking her hand in his.  “Do you want to talk about it?”  he asked her. 

                   Evelyn looked sadly at her missing arm.  “It’s so ugly…” she whispered.  “I’m not a whole person anymore.  It’s not just the arm.  I wasn’t able to stop my friend from his plans, everyone here hates me and are spreading rumors about me.  Teagan has been such an ass towards me.  Now I can barely defend myself if something happens again.  I’ve tried to come to terms with it, but I don’t know how.  And now, I’m afraid to make love with my husband.”

                   “Evie, it’s only been a day.  It doesn’t surprise me that you are feeling this way.   I know that your arm bothers you, but you need to understand that I would rather have you as you are than not at all.  It was only yesterday that we didn’t know if you would die because of the Anchor- it was just as bad as when we worried over Charlotte before she was born.  I’m still so grateful that you are alive that I want to keep touching you, just to make sure I’m not dreaming.”  Evelyn could feel the tears in her eyes as he spoke. “Why don’t we sleep on it?  Tomorrow, we can discuss Solas and plan for dealing with the Council.  After that, we’ll take it one day at a time.” 

                   Evelyn nodded.  “I’m sorry,” she said.  She felt weak, and even though Cullen said it was all right, she felt like she was letting him down. She had never turned him away before.

                   Cullen put his hand to her cheek. “You don’t need to be.  You don’t ever need to be.  This is a big shock to you.  I’ll always be here to help you. Come, let’s get ready for bed.”  Cullen stood and held his hand out to her.  She took it and got up as well.  He started to help her undress but she stopped him. 

                   “I should figure out how to do this myself,” she said. “Granted, my regular clothes are a lot simpler than this uniform,” she grumbled as she struggled with the belt.  After a few minutes, she got the belt off and started working on the rest.  It took her a lot longer, but she finally managed to get her clothing off and her nightgown on.  She sat on the bed for a moment, worn out.  “Makes me want to start sleeping naked,” she said as she looked at the laces on her gown.

                   “You won’t get any complaints from me on that one,” Cullen said, amused.  He watched her as she got back up and started trying to fold her clothes.  Though she was unpracticed- she did a fair job of it, smiling to herself as she put the clothes away.  As they lay in bed, Evelyn turned to Cullen, realizing that she couldn’t put her arm around him.  “I can’t even hold you…” she whispered sadly.  She heard Cullen chuckle before he took her around the waist and flipped her over to his other side. 

                   “There,” he said, “problem solved.” Smiling, she put her arm around him and drifted off.

 


	53. Chapter Fifty-Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been so long. I ended up doing something I promised I wouldn't do. I started another fic- I was really inspired and I haven't been able to stop writing. I'm going to post what I have and get this wrapped up. I'm having trouble with the last chapter- still working on it.

Chapter Fifty-Three

                   The four of them sat silently after Evelyn had told him about Solas.  His plan to end the world as they knew it to bring back the world as he had known it.  Evelyn sat with her head down, drained from the retelling.  “What do we do now?” Josephine asked.  “Do we inform the Council?”

                   “Would they believe us if we did?” Cullen asked.  “We have no proof, no concrete dates- there is no evidence like there was with the Breach.”

                   “You mean the almost Qunari invasion isn’t evidence?” Josephine asked. They all sat for a while, pondering the question.

                   “No,” Evelyn replied. “All that proves is that the Qunari were trying to take over.  Bull, Thom and Dorian and I are the only witnesses to the true reason behind the attack.  Not many people at the Council even know who Solas is, much less care about him. They’ll never believe it.”  Evelyn fingered the wolf’s tooth necklace that she still wore, remembering how Solas had noticed it and ran his fingers across it.  The sad look on his face had overwhelmed her.  She truly believed him when he said he took no joy in what he was going to do but didn’t understand his need to try to bring up the past.  He was one of the ones who had taught her that looking back helped no one. 

                   “So, we have a few more days before the Council reconvenes.  We must discuss whether we continue on or disband,” said Josephine.  Evelyn was still fraught with indecision.  She didn’t want to abandon everyone who had worked so hard, but she didn’t see a need to continue on either.  She wished that she could take the time to talk to Alistair and Elissa about this and get their advice.  She knew Cullen had written to Alistair complaining of Teagan’s accusations, but she wasn’t sure if the letter had even reached Alistair yet.

                   Looking at Cullen, she spoke. “If I were forced to make a choice right now, I would disband.  We have Elven and Qunari spies among our ranks, most of the core group has gone on to other things.  However, I do not want to abandon those who had worked so hard, and we can’t ignore Solas.  I know you all have your personal feelings about what to do, and I want to take those into account as well.”

                   The four looked at each other.  Leliana finally spoke.  “Inquisitor, I think all of us are in agreement about disbanding in an official capacity.  Having everyone spread out with their ears to the ground for Solas will be the most effective way to keep track of what is going on.  If we continue as the Inquisition, we will have more corruption in the ranks- we need to go back to just the people we can trust.  I suggest that we each take the time to find those whom we trust the most and come together tomorrow to talk.  Think about it carefully.”

                   Cullen and Evelyn walked back to their room, both lost in thought.  They didn’t discuss anything regarding the meeting so nothing could be overheard, but it was very much on their mind.  When they got back to their room, they went into the bedroom and closed the door, discussing everything in quiet voices.

                   “What do you think?” she asked Cullen.  He sat at the edge of the bed, arms resting on his knees, looking pensively at his hands.  She knew he was in favor of disbanding- they had talked about that long ago.  He was happy working his Sanctuary and being with his family- he no longer had any ambition to a military life.  Evelyn was more interested in who Cullen trusted the most.  It had taken him a lot longer than Evelyn to warm up to their companions- mostly because he had not traveled with them as she had, but she valued his opinion.

                   After a little while, Cullen said, “I know who I am going to ask.  I think you need to trust your instincts and choose who you will ask.”  He looked up as Evelyn stifled a sob.

                   “I trusted Solas,” she said.  “I think my judgment of character is in question at the moment.”

                   “Evie, you can’t doubt yourself.  And you can’t question the rest of your companions based on that either.  Solas got you through so much, saved your life, brought you back many times over- you trusted Solas the Elven mage.  That he turned into Fen’Harel could not have been seen by any of us. And even then, he still saved your life and brought you back to us.  He could have let you die, or left you wandering in that world forever.”  Cullen continued to watch Evelyn as she considered his words.

                   In the end, Evelyn and Cullen decided on asking all of the remaining companions, Rylen, Ser Barris, Lysas, King Alistair and Queen Elissa, Devlin and Warrick.  Between all of them, and bringing in those whom Leliana and Josephine trusted, they could set up a large network of eyes and ears all over Thedas.  Evelyn even decided to include Osborne- but was undecided whether to send a letter or see him in person. 

                   After they had tired themselves talking about it, they lay in each other’s arms quietly.  Cullen suddenly had a thought and sat up, looking into Evelyn’s eyes.  “I hadn’t thought of it until just now.  Your eyes are blue again.  No green.  I haven’t seen that in so long, I’d almost forgotten.”  He caressed Evelyn’s cheek as she smiled. 

                   A little later, they sat up to a knock at the door.  Leliana had arrived to inform them that Francine and Monette had taken the bait and approached Zevran to arrange for Cullen’s “kidnapping”.  “So Commander, you are going to find yourself feeling the need to take a constitutional this evening sometime while your wife is ignoring you as usual.”  Cullen’s lips twitched at that.  “I would recommend that you find somewhere else for Maximus to be.  He’s smart, but Zevran doesn’t want to hurt him.” 

                   After she left, Cullen and Evelyn went to go find their friends and invite them to a meeting them next day.  They sat at lunch quietly, contemplating that morning's meeting.  As they ate, Sera plopped herself down at the table, Dagna sitting next to her.  “Oi, what do want me to do about all these people talking bad about you?” Sera asked Evelyn.  Evelyn gave her a questioning look.  “Look, I promised Thom I’d behave and not make you look bad.  It’s been a bloody challenge- these Orlesians are stupid fops that need a Jenny to bring them down.”

                   Dagna took over.  “Inquisitor, what Sera is trying to say is that we have all been hearing the Orlesians say not very nice things about you.  We all heard those women last night- and we’ve all seen those two spreading horrible rumors about you.  It’s been going on since we got here.  And it’s gotten worse since you…since you lost your arm.  I’m working on something for that by the way.”

                   Evelyn sat pondering this for a while.  Sera slammed her hand on the table.  “I say arrows,” she declared.  Evelyn shook her head but didn’t say anything.  As always, even though she knew better, she found herself swimming in self-doubt.  She knew what they were saying, she had heard most of it from listening in on the two women.  She pushed her plate away, losing her appetite. 

                   Varric came in and looked at the quiet table.  “What’s going on?” he said as he sat down on the bench.  He looked at everyone- Sera looking mutinous, Evelyn looking sad, Cullen was angry and Dagna was…well, Dagna. 

                   “Trying to figure out how to take care of piss-head story-spreaders,” said Sera.  “They won’t let me use arrows.”

                   “Oh,” said Varric.  He knew what they were talking about.  “Your fan club still trying to steal you Curly?”  He looked around- the tavern was still mostly empty, but he still kept his voice low.  “I have to be honest, Lady.  Sera’s not the only one who’s pissed off.  They’ve said some pretty downright nasty things about you.  I’ve even heard rumors that you’re a blood mage, or that you’ve used a love potion to keep Cullen under control.”

                   Evelyn rested her hand on her hand, instinctively bringing her stump up as if to rest her head on both hands, before stopping herself in frustration.  She fought to keep herself under control.  She had an incredible amount of support that kept her strong- she had come to realize that from the first day she confessed her problems to Dorian on her balcony at Skyhold and watched him spring into action.  She was out of her element here, though.  The same people who had been falling all over themselves months ago at the ball were now treating her like a pariah.

                   Cullen muttered to the table, “It will be taken care of soon enough.  Trust me.”   Evelyn got up and left the table.  Cullen started to get up to go after her, but she stopped him, saying to finish eating.  She just needed some time.

                   Evelyn walked around, staying hidden as best she could, when she heard from behind her, “My lady, are you all right?”  She turned around to see Thom Rainier standing and smiling at her.  She sat down on a bench feeling defeated.  Thom sat down next to her and waited for her to speak.

                   “Are you sure you want to sit next to me Thom?  Do you want to be seen in the company of a crippled whore who ignores her husband?” she asked bitterly.   The stress she had been under- the Qunari, Solas, her arm, the Council had finally shredded her down to nothing and she couldn’t take the gossip and rumors anymore.  She just wanted to go home.

                   Thom laughed.  “I’d rather been seen with you than any of these cheap trashy women here.  You have more class in your little finger than any of these painted up Orlesians.”  He put his arm around her.  “In spite of everything in my life, I’ve never been happier than leaving this place, and I can’t wait to leave again.”

                   “Where are you going after this?” Evelyn asked. 

                   “Wherever the Wardens send me I suppose,” Thom mused.  “Don’t worry, I’m sure I’ll be able to come by and visit at some point. See that baby of yours.”  He had brought a few toys he had carved as a gift for Charlotte- they were adorable.  “I’m more concerned about you.  I know you are having a hard time.  Anything you want to talk about?”

                   Evelyn sighed. “Just feeling sorry for myself I guess.  I don’t want to depress you.”  Thom gave her a level gaze that obviously meant that he was willing to listen.  Evelyn sighed.  “I’m just tired.  I’ve no patience for the game and I’m stuck in the middle of it.  I need to make a decision about the Inquisition. I lost Solas.  I lost my wedding ring.  I lost my arm, and it aches like it’s still there.  I keep feeling it and keep reaching for things only to remember that my arm is gone.  Now I have to deal with these fool women spreading horrible rumors about me.  Rumors people are believing from what I understand.”  Evelyn heaved a deep breath and sat, unable to say anymore.  They sat quietly, Thom’s arm still around her.

                   ‘My lady, I wish there was a way I could ease your burdens,” Thom said sadly.  “The game is not my cup of tea, and I don’t know how to fix your arm.  I wish I had some fatherly advice to offer you, but all I can offer is an open ear and a large shoulder to lean on.”

                   Evelyn laughed.  “I’ll take what I can get,” she replied.  “Thanks, Thom.”  They talked about the Inquisition and its future- Evelyn had told Thom about the meeting the next day and he planned to be there.  Thom ended up telling her some more Grey Warden stories, cheering Evelyn up and helping her feel better.

                   “Come, my Lady.  Why don’t we walk a bit and find that husband of yours?  He’s probably getting worried.”  Thom stood up and held his arm out to Evelyn, who stood up and took it.  They walked companionably for a while before meeting up with Cullen, who had been worriedly looking for Evelyn. 

                   “Are you feeling better Evie?” Cullen asked anxiously.  “I’ve been looking for you.” 

                   “I’m all right.  Thom and I were just talking- I just had to be away from public eye for a while.”  She kissed Thom on the cheek as he released her arm.  “I’ll see you later Thom, and thank you.”  Thom nodded and headed back to his usual spot.  After Thom left, Cullen pulled Evelyn into his arms, resting his chin on top of her head.  “I’m sorry I worried you, Cullen.  I shouldn’t let these things get to me.”

                   Cullen closed his eyes- these people made him so angry.  They didn’t even know her but were believing the horrible things being said.  It was getting to the point that he no longer cared about causing an incident- he wanted to start knocking heads.  Just about a half hour before, a man and woman approached him asking if it were true that the Inquisitor’s child wasn’t truly his, but that Qunari companions of hers.  Cullen gazed at them speechlessly.  “You are speaking of her Worship,  the Inquisitor, and my wife.  She is an amazing woman who has sacrificed and suffered to keep your world safe.  I do not appreciate you spreading rumors about her or her friends who have also put their lives on the line to save yours.  I have said this repeatedly to everyone who has approached me and that will not change.”  He walked away from them before he said something regretful. 

                   “It’s all right Love.  It’s starting to get to me too.  I wish we could just leave. But, I suppose it’s almost time for my…constitutional.”  Evelyn looked grim at that.  She trusted Zevran and Leliana, but she was worried that something could go wrong. “This will all be over soon,” Cullen whispered as he kissed Evelyn before taking off.  Evelyn called Maximus to her and they left to head over to Zevran’s room. 

                   When she arrived, she found Leliana there with a few Orlais guards, Cyril de Montfort, an irritated looking gentleman, and Iron Bull was there too.  Leliana had everyone sit in the other room behind a closed door, and they waited for Zevran to show up with Cullen.  The silence in the room was deafening- Evelyn and Bull conversed quietly, but the guards and the gentlemen sat in silence.  Cyril watched Evelyn closely but said nothing.   

                   A half hour later, Zevran showed up with Cullen in tow- hands bound behind his back and a bag over his head.  Shortly after that, there was a knock at the door- everyone in closed room strained to listen. Zevran made Cullen pretend he was drugged, so he didn’t have to speak or be spoken to and had him lying on the couch.  He answered the door and admitted Francine and Monette into the room.

                   “I trust you have done as asked?” asked Francine imperiously.  She looked at the bound man lying on the couch. “Show me.  I need proof.”  Zevran sauntered over to Cullen and took the bag off.  “Did you drug him?  I was told the vial we provided you would make him wake up disoriented and much easier to persuade.” 

                   “Of course.  I am a professional, Madame,” replied Zevran.  “I do as I am paid to do.”

                   “Fine then.  Leave us.  We have business here tonight before we have him moved to Monette’s summer home,” Francine ordered.

                   Monette clapped her hands excitedly.  “Ohh, I can’t wait to make him mine,” she cooed.  Francine looked at her.  “Ours,” Monette corrected herself. 

                   “Out of curiosity, what are your plans for our illustrious Commander?” Zevran asked.  “From what I understand, he is already married with a child.  They were married by Divine Victoria herself- which makes it pretty official I think.”

                   “That child is not his.  The child is the Qunari’s- I am certain of it,” Francine declared.  “We just need some time to convince him that he does not have to stay with her and then he will be ours.”

                   At that, the grumpy gentlemen swore and threw the door open.  “Francine.  What is the meaning of this?”  He stormed into the room and planted himself in front of her.  Francine stopped and stood still as if pretending that she couldn’t be seen if she didn’t move.

                   “Guillaume”, she whimpered, “what are you doing here?”   It was obvious she was not expecting to see him.  Guillaume crossed his arms and stared at her, staying silent.  Francine kept stammering. “I…I was just helping Monette rescue her lover,” she exclaimed.  “He…had been bewitched by the Inquisitor and was convinced her mongrel baby was his.”

                   “He will be ours?” Guillaume repeated.  “That is what you said.  Have you forgotten that we are married…again?”  Francine looked at the floor, saying nothing.  “Honestly Francine, I leave town for a few days and you can’t manage to keep your knickers on. Were you and your whore friend going to drug this man and dispose of him like the last one? Bring your friends in?”

                   When she heard this, Evelyn stood up.  Bull grabbed her by the arm to hold her back, pulling her close to whisper in her ear. “Not yet.” Evelyn looked at Leliana furiously, but stayed back, realizing they needed more to go on. 

                   Francine began to realize that something was going on behind the scenes and that she and her friend may be in trouble.  Guillaume turned to Zevran.  “And what exactly is your role in this sordid affair?”  He waited expectantly as Zevran bowed low to him.   

                   “Sir, I was hired by these ladies to kidnap the Commander.  I was provided with this vial and told to drug him and bring him here.  Once the transaction was going to be completed, I would leave here and let the ladies do as they wished.  They did not specify what their plans were beyond that,” said Zevran.  “What they did not know is that I am a friend of the Inquisition.  Have you met the Inquisitor?  She’s a lovely lady.  It was a great honor to do her this favor.”

                   “Well, Francine.  Is this true?  He certainly has no reason to lie to me.”  Guillaume waited expectantly for an answer but Francine remained silent, glaring daggers at Zevran.  Guillaume continued, “I’ve heard the whispering you know.  Your niece’s fiancé from last season, Henri- you did the same thing to him.  You ruined your own niece’s engagement by spreading rumors about her and then the boy had to be sent away in shame.  Your own niece still has yet to make a proper match because of the things you and your horrible friends said. And now you try to do the same thing to the Inquisitor.  You messed with the wrong people this time.”

                   Francine sputtered.  “I did nothing of the sort.  Henri tried to seduce me.  He was the one who told me those things about Lily- I only repeated them in self-defense of my moral character.  You know I would never cheat on you, Guillaume.”

                   “No,” Guillaume said a little sadly, “I do not know that.  I have overlooked your behavior for too long Francine.  There have been so many men and women- do you not think I don’t hear the gossip? This is the final straw.  Our marriage is over.  Finally, blessedly over.  You will get nothing thanks to your adultery and other crimes.”

                   “Guillaume, do not do this,” pleaded Francine. “I swear I’ll never do this again.  Just don’t divorce me.”  Guillaume turned his back on her and left.  She looked at Monette.  “He won’t get everything.  There is no proof.  No one will believe the Antivan, and no one else is here that will tell.” She glanced around the room nervously, wondering if she spoke too soon.  She had. 

                   Leliana came through the same door as Guillaume.  “No proof Madame DuBarry?  Unfortunately, for you, there are witnesses.”  With that, Bull, Evelyn, and Cyril followed her out the door, along with the guards, and Cullen stood up- Zevran removing the bag and bindings.  They all stood and simply watched the two women squirm under their gaze.  Evelyn looked at Cullen who nodded that he was all right before turning her eyes to the two women.

                   “Why?” she asked simply.  “Why me?”  She stared at the two women who stood arrogantly before her.  She wasn’t sure she wanted to hear the answer, but she couldn’t turn away either.  As she studied the women, she noticed something that made her lurch forward in anger.  She snatched up Monette’s left hand and held it before her.  “You are wearing my wedding ring.”  Evelyn’s voice shook with righteous anger.  “Cullen put THAT ring on MY finger on our wedding day, and you stole it after I was injured and kept it for yourself.  How DARE you!” she shouted.  Leliana and Cullen looked at each other, unsure as to whether they should stop Evelyn or not.  She was perfectly justified in her anger, and given the circumstances, they were reluctant to pull her away.  She had been remarkably self-contained to this point, but everyone in the room could see that she had hit her breaking point.

                   Evelyn pulled the ring off and thrust Monette’s hand away as if it were filthy.  She looked at the two again, feeling the emotions of the last several days washing over her.  Even at Skyhold and during the war, she had always tried to keep her temper- very rarely even raising her voice because she had been taught it wasn’t proper. She had come to realize she no longer cared about that.

                   She turned to Leliana.  “Leliana, I am assuming you had agents look into these two after we first spoke correct?” Leliana nodded.  “And what are their stories?”

                   Drawing a breath, Leliana started explaining. “Nothing of note, Inquisitor.  Both born to wealthy families, finishing schools, cotillions, and shopping.  Madame DuBarry married ten years ago and has not been able to keep her smalls on ever since.   Madame DuPuis is unmarried but has had many lovers.  She had written Skyhold shortly after the Ball requesting information on Ser Cullen for marriage purposes, but we replied that he was not available.”

                   Evelyn remained standing watching the two ladies as they shot angry glances at Leliana before speaking again.  “Bull, what do your Ben-Hasserath eyes see?” 

                   Bull grunted.  “No remorse.  If they hadn’t been caught, they’d have done it again.  These two are useless, and probably lousy lays too.”

                   Evelyn leveled her gaze at the women again.  “I’ll ask you again.  Why me?”  As she waited for an answer, Cullen came up behind her and put his arms around her waist.  “What did I ever do to you that would cause you to try to bring me such pain?”  She wanted to go on, listing off their many indiscretions over the past days, but she knew it would fall on deaf ears.  These women were true narcissists- taking what they wanted when they wanted, and feelings of the injured parties be damned. 

                   Francine snorted.  “Look at you.  Do I even need to answer?  There is no way that man is with you of his own accord.  You had to have trapped him into marriage.  Theodosia Remarche told me all about you, you know.  Plain, mousy, desperate.  You begged her boy to marry you, and then when he spurned you, you stripped them of everything they owned and sent them away. Oh, I’ve heard all about you.  Running all over the countryside with different women and men- including that awful Qunari, a Tevinter magister, thieves, murders, brigands- whoring yourself to them while this handsome man stayed trapped in that castle waiting for you.  Then you get “pregnant” so he’ll marry you because no one else would ever have you.”

                   Cullen tightened his arms around Evelyn, feeling her hand twitch as if to slap the woman.  She exhaled and patted his arm.  Straightening up, she looked at the women again.  “I won’t even dignify your accusations with a rebuttal, ladies.  I believe that with the evidence that Leliana has gathered, the witnessing of the guards present, and Cyril de Montfort himself,  and the testimony of Zevran, as well as Monsieur DuBarry’s complaint, not only will you be left penniless, but you will be called up on charges as well.  Your friends are going to turn their backs on you so fast, it will make your ignorant little heads spin.”

                   “What power do you think you have?” Monette shot back.  “The Inquisition is done, everyone says so.  You are nothing but a useless cripple who no longer has any power.  I am not afraid.”

                   Leliana stopped her.  “The Inquisition may be disbanding, but do not forget that Empress Celene, Gaspard, and Briala owe the Inquisitor for stopping the civil war and bringing them together to rule.  No matter where her Worship goes, she has powerful friends- King Alistair and Queen Elissa, Divine Victoria, Empress Celene.  She has the love of the people and the loyalty of the nations behind her.”

                   Cullen continued, “You may call her a useless cripple, but I call her wife and mother to my child.  I adore her and I would die for her.  When have either of you two ever had that in your empty, wasted lives?”  Monette looked stricken at this, finally realizing that not only was Cullen lost to her but was never hers in the first place and that she was looking at a very lonely future. 

                   Evelyn looked to the guards.  “I will leave these two ladies to your custody to charge as you see fit.  We can start with kidnapping and theft charges filed by Ser Cullen and myself, The Banns of Honnleath.  Leliana’s agents will be in contact with any other evidence they have found.”  The guards nodded and went to cuff the women- marching them out the door. 

                   After they left, Evelyn collapsed onto a nearby couch.  “Well that was fun,” she said.  “It’s a good thing I had plenty of practice dealing with that kind of talk from my own family.  It made it a little easier this time.”  She smiled grimly as Cullen sat next to her.  She turned to Cyril de Montfort.  “Do you see what I have been putting up with since I arrived here?”  Cyril was quiet, but he nodded.

                   “Your Worship, please accept my deepest apologies for the behavior of the Orlesian people.  Please rest assured that not all behave this way.  I do not know what I can do to contain the issue, but I will try.”

                   Evelyn shook her head.  “Don’t worry about it.  Perhaps seeing the ladies taken out in cuffs will stop chins from wagging for a while.”

                   Bull laughed.  “I’m glad I was here to see it.  I have to go tell Dorian about it before he explodes.”  He patted Evelyn on the shoulder before heading out, nodding at Leliana and Zevran as he left.  He stopped and turned to Zevran.  “Hey, you’d make a pretty good Charger.  Think about it.” 

                   Leliana asked Evelyn is she was all right.   Evelyn didn’t speak right away.  She was shaking from the adrenaline of the confrontation.  Even though she did not get to say everything she wanted, she managed to keep her dignity intact- not losing her temper, or crying- but she still felt sad.  “I just want to go lay down,” she said.  Cullen stood up and waited for Evelyn to join him, putting his arm around her waist as they left the room.

                   They walked back to their rooms, still trying to wrap their heads around what had happened.  Evelyn finally spoke.  “You weren’t hurt at all were you?” Cullen shook his head- Zev had been a complete professional.  When they reached their rooms, Evelyn sat down on the couch again, Cullen sitting beside her.  He wrapped his arms around her and enveloped her in his arms.  They sat quietly like that for a long time before Evelyn sat up.  She reached into her pocket and pulled out the wedding ring she had taken from Monette.  She looked at it sadly- it seemed tainted now- especially when she noticed that in the short time she had it, Monette had managed to get hers and Cullens named engraved on the inside.  She stifled a sob- her beautiful wedding ring was forever ruined.  Cullen took the ring from her and looked at it, swearing.

                   She didn’t even know what to do with the ring anymore.  She knew that if she kept it, she would be reminded of this every time she looked at it, but it didn’t feel right throwing it away either.  Cullen understood her indecision.  “Evie, just put it away for now.  You can decide what to do with it another time when clearer heads prevail.  All right?”  Evelyn nodded.  “Besides,” he continued, ”I had a chat with Thom after I couldn’t find your ring.  Apparently, he has started making them as a hobby after he made yours.”  Cullen pulled a package out of his pocket and opened it.  He pulled out a beautiful silverite and everite ring.  “There wasn’t time to have runes put on it, but Dagna has offered her services if you would like it.  Thom pulled this one especially for you- he said it took him the longest to make, and once he heard about your lost ring, he knew this was the one for you.”  Cullen got down on one knee before Evelyn.  “We don’t have to get married again, but I want to put this ring on your finger like I did the first time.”  He slid the ring on her right hand and kissed it.

                   Evelyn looked at the ring, feeling her emotions getting the better of her.  The ring was beautiful- Thom was a very talented craftsman- but she had already known that.  Her heart was overwhelmed with love and gratitude for her husband- this trip had been hard on him too, and he had gone out of his way to make Evelyn feel loved and beautiful and had always put her first.  She grabbed him by the lapel and pulled him towards her, crushing her lips against his.  He returned her kiss gladly, but he let her take her time and followed her lead.  She deepened the kiss, her tongue meeting his.  She reached for his belt, starting to unbuckle it, harrumphing in frustration that she couldn’t get it off fast enough.  Cullen stood up, bringing Evelyn with him and let her start pushing him to the bedroom, both of them leaving a trail of clothes as they went before collapsing on the bed. 

                   Cullen sat up on the bed with Evelyn straddling him and they spent a few minutes just looking at each other.  Evelyn bit her lip as she glanced at her arm, looking away in embarrassment.  Cullen pulled her face back gently by the chin, gazing into her eyes before running his hand up and down her arm.  He kissed down her neck and chest, before catching her nipple with his tongue.  With a moan, Evelyn pulled away from him and moved down his body, her lips ghosting along him, stopping at a few favorite points before she ran her tongue down his length.  She had a take a minute to figure out how to keep her balance while she ran her thumb over his sensitive head before taking him into her mouth, but she finally managed.  As she bobbed up and down on his member, Cullen moaned, holding her head in his hands and thrusting himself lightly into her mouth.  Her warm tongue felt so good on his cock, he could barely take it.  She swirled her tongue around him, lightly cupping his balls with her hand as she continued to suck him off.  Before he could come, Cullen pulled Evelyn up toward him, kissing her deeply before pulling her up to straddle his face.  He ran his tongue along her dripping seam listening as she gasped and moaned in response.  He thrust his tongue inside of her as deeply as he could as she ground herself on his face, already so close- almost screaming as his tongue found her little nub.  He alternated between working the little bundle of nerves and running the length of her until she came, moaning and crying his name.

                   As she settled, Cullen rolled Evelyn onto her back and lined himself at her entrance, slowly pushing himself in until he hilted.  They lay for a few minutes enjoying each other before Cullen started to thrust into her, taking her hardened nipple in his mouth as he pulled out and slammed back into her, moaning at how tight she was still.  Hearing his breathing starting to go ragged, Evelyn took a minute to figure out how to position him and flipped them over so she was riding him.  She took him into her as deeply as she could, riding him lustily as Cullen sat up to nuzzle her breasts.  The change in position allowed Cullen to go in deeper and put pressure on her clit and on the sensitive area inside of her sending Evelyn over the edge again.  Her channel tightened around Cullen’s cock as she came, bringing him close to his own release, but he wasn’t done yet.  He rolled Evelyn onto her back again and wrapped her legs around his waist, slamming into her hard and fast over and over.  As he plowed into her, he could feel the tightening of his testicles as his orgasm overtook him, crying out as he spilled his seed inside of her.  He collapsed on top of her, both of them panting with exertion, their arms around each other.  He took her hand in his, feeling the ring he had just put on her finger a little while before.  “I love you,” he whispered to her.  Evelyn squeezed his hand murmured sleepily that she loved him too.


	54. Chapter Fifty-Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to finish up what I think will be the last chapter- hopefully I'll have it soon.

Chapter Fifty-Four

                   The next morning, all of the chosen companions that were available gathered in the makeshift war room to discuss the future of the Inquisition.  Evelyn stood before them, wondering how everyone felt about it.  She had discussed her feeling with a few of them, and she thought most of them were in agreement.

                   “Tomorrow, the Exalted Council reconvenes, and a decision needs to be made about the future of the Inquisition,” Evelyn said. “As you know, the Fereldan representative, Bann Teagan wants to disband the Inquisition- he is, in fact, insistent about it.  I know from my discussions with King Alistair that he will support whatever decision is made and that he does not support the accusations that Teagan is making.  Orlais wants to control us- we have elven and Qunari spies running rampant through our ranks as we speak.”  Evelyn took some time to explain what happened with the Qunari and told them about everything Solas had said to her and what it meant for the future of Thedas.

                   The room was silent, everyone mulling over the ramifications of Solas’ decisions.  Evelyn continued, “Yesterday, I met with the Inquisition's advisors and told them all of this and we discussed our options.  I do not want to abandon all of those who are still with the Inquisition- but the thought of being controlled by Orlais, and being spied upon from within our own ranks does not sit well with me.”

                   She looked at Cullen, Leliana and Josephine, who nodded to her, and then continued speaking.  “Solas knows us too well.  Marching to war is not the answer in this situation- we cannot approach this like we did the Breach and Corypheus.  I recommend that the Inquisition be disbanded, and any remaining money be used to help those who have nowhere to go. After that, any remaining funds will go to the Sanctuary for further Inquisition use.  King Alistair has already stated that he will take any soldiers into his army, and I am sure that Gaspard will do the same with the Orlesians.  The Sanctuary at Honnleath could use some extra help as well- we have more Templars coming in then we figured on- so we can take those who are willing to travel there.”

                   She stopped and waited for anyone to speak up, but they seemed to want to hear the whole plan before speaking, so she continued.  “Those of you who are established somewhere- Dorian, Divine Victoria, Lady Vivienne, Varric, King Alistair and Queen Elissa, etc can use their influence and gather those who they trust to help when it’s needed.  Our travelers- Thom, Sera, Cole, Bull and so on can be our ears on the ground.  I would like to establish the Sanctuary as home base- with the number of Templars and people going in and out, it will not be quite as obvious,” she turned to Dorian.  “Dorian, we need as many Tevinter connections as we can manage for this.  Stay in contact, ok?”  Dorian nodded.  She was quiet for a moment.  “We need to save Solas from himself.  We need to prove to him that this world is worth keeping.”  She stopped for a moment as her breath hitched before asking what people thought.

                   Everyone was quiet for a moment before Thom spoke up.  “You have my support, my Lady.  I will do what I can among the Wardens.”  There were many nods of agreement.

                   “Does anyone disagree?” Evelyn asked.  The room was quiet.  “I guess it’s settled then.  The announcement will be made tomorrow and we will start the disbanding process shortly after.”  There wasn’t much to say beyond that.  When the meeting was done, most people lingered, talking to each other, taking a few moments to see Evelyn to pledge their help.  Many of them already had ideas of what they could do and were eager to share.  Evelyn watched everyone, marveling at the potential connections there were already were.  Among her friends, family and companions she had access to Red Jennies, the mages, the Templars, the Grey Wardens, the Chantry, and the Fereldan and Orlesian armies.  There was also possible added military strength from the Free Marches via Varric and her brother Osborne- and Varric promised to approach Prince Sebastian of Starkhaven as well. 

                   As little confidence as she had in herself, in the beginning, Evelyn had proven herself time and time again to the people who had believed in her, winning their confidence, affection, and loyalty.  It was because of her kindness, caring and generosity of spirit that all of the people in this room, and the ones who they still had to visit, that Evelyn was able to gather this kind of support, even though she would no longer have an organization or even a title after tomorrow.  Cullen watched her with pride as she spoke to her friends.  He saw it in her early on, even if she hadn’t, and now, she still had the loyalty of a large group of powerful people- he knew in his heart that if the day came where they could not persuade Solas to stop his plan, they would be ready to stop him.

                   Later that evening, everyone gathered at the tavern for a final dinner.  Most people teased Cullen about how nice it was to eat without his harem around- even he had to laugh after a while.  They had heard through the grapevine that Francine and Monette were sitting in the same jail that had held Thom Rainier at one time- a place Evelyn knew to be very dank and miserable.  Cyril de Montfort had approached her earlier to ask if they wanted to ladies turned over to the Inquisition for judgment, but she declined.  Even though she had judged the Remarches for crimes against her own person, she had almost deferred to Orlais because she had been personally involved in the case.  She felt the same way in this case, but because she knew that she was disbanding the Inquisition, she told Cyril to let the Orlesian courts handle it- she had no jurisdiction over the DuBarry divorce anyway.  The last dinner was a joyous and sad time- a lot of laughter, drinking, even dancing.  It lasted long into the night before everyone finally went their separate ways.  Some of them were leaving immediately in the morning, knowing the outcome of the Council already- they didn’t feel the need to stay.

                   As Dorian was one of these people, Evelyn spent a few extra moments with him before she and Cullen retired for the evening.  She and Dorian sat on a bench outside of the tavern quietly, their hands clasped together.  “We have the crystals, Cousin.  We can talk all the time.  You know I will be careful, and you know I will find you the help you need.”

                   “I know Dorian.  It doesn’t make me miss you less.  I would not be here if it weren’t for you.  The best thing I ever did was come to talk to you that day about Halamshiral- Otherwise, I’d probably still be hiding in my room at Skyhold, lonely and miserable.”

                   “Perhaps.  You give yourself far too little credit Cousin.”  He stood up.  “I have an evening to spend with Bull before I go, so I must leave you here.”  Evelyn got up and they hugged one final time.  “I will come and see you sometime Evelyn.  I swear it.  And there had better be more babies for me to spoil when I get there.”  He kissed her and the bowed one final time, smiling as he left.

                   There was a letter from Honnleath waiting for Evelyn and Cullen when they returned to their room- a letter from Mia reporting that the Orlesian family who had the arranged marriage with Charlotte had come to get her.  They arrived with a small contingent of soldiers, but they were held off and sent packing by the Templars and that Charlotte was still safe at home.  After reading this letter, Evelyn immediately started gathering their things together.  “Love, what are you doing?” Cullen asked her.

                   As she was folding some clothes before putting them in the pack, she said. “I know we can’t leave until tomorrow- but I want to be off as soon as we are done at the Council.  I want to go home.  Immediately.  We should have been there to protect her too.”

                   Cullen nodded. “You’re right.  I know we were going to make some stops on the way home, but I think we should go get Charlotte first.”  They had planned to see Alistair and Elissa for certain, and go to Skyhold to help with the disbanding before going home- but they were now both in agreement that they needed to be with Charlotte now.  “First thing in the morning, I’ll let our fellow travelers know that we will be leaving as soon as possible.”  Bull and the Chargers had planned on traveling with them, as well as a few Orlesian Templars who had approached Cullen about his Sanctuary.  Cullen pulled Evelyn into his arms.  “I know you’re worried- I am too- but Charlotte is safe.  You know that our siblings and the Templars will let nothing bad happen.

                   “I know Cullen.  I just miss her.  I’d been thinking about going home to get her before continuing with our travels anyway, I just hadn’t said anything yet. 

                   The next morning, Cullen and Evelyn dressed with care in their Inquisition dress uniforms, for hopefully the last time.  The Council meeting itself was short as Evelyn just strode in, threw the Inquisition orders on the table and disbanded.  There was not much else to say after that.  Teagan looked like he wanted to say something, but Evelyn did not allow it.  His accusations against her had not sat well, especially now knowing that part of it was because he was bitter about Alistair asking Evelyn and Cullen to be advisors to baby Duncan in the future if it was needed and that Cullen and Evelyn were Duncan’s godparents as well.

                   With the announcement done, Evelyn took a moment to track down Cyril De Montfort.  He was disappointed by her announcement, but he said he understood why.  Evelyn knew he was only an ambassador, but she asked his advice regarding the Orlesian family, the marriage arrangement and their attempt to take Charlotte from her upon their refusal to honor the arrangement.  She nodded when he told her that there was nothing he could do, but if she would pen a letter, he would give it to the Empress herself- and she would personally put a stop to it as a personal favor.  “Thank you, Cyril.  I think it would be wise to arrange a meeting between Gaspard and King Alistair in a few weeks time.  We will be visiting them, I will send you a time table.  We have some business that needs to be discussed, and it is not something that can be done here.”  Cyril nodded, they shook hands and left going their separate ways. 

               After saying a final goodbye to Cassandra, they finally left for home. Evelyn was grateful that Brutus was smart- she found it a little difficult to handle reins with one hand, but she was able to manage well enough.  They traveled as swiftly as possible, encountering no problems along the way until they reached about halfway to Honnleath.  There they encountered a caravan.  Since they were not traveling under the Inquisition banner anymore, it was easier to travel unrecognized, which gave them the advantage in this situation.

              

               They had stopped to set up camp when the caravan approached- a group of soldiers and a carriage that was Orlesian by design.  The carriage pulled up and a middle-aged man exited and approached, asking to share their fire for the evening.  When they had agreed, the man’s wife exited the carriage as well, looking haughty but staying silent.

              

               As they sat around the fire that evening after a hearty meal of roasted ram meat, Cullen asked them what had brought them out this way.  The man had introduced himself earlier, and Evelyn and Cullen had both recognized the name immediately, staying silent.

 

               “We had traveled to Honnleath to take custody of my son’s future wife,” the man declared. 

              

               Bull grunted.  “And how did that work out for you?  I don’t see anyone else with you.” 

              

               The man harrumphed.  “The child was rather well protected,” he said.  “We were not able to take her.  We are on our way to get help.  We will not rest until we have taken what was promised to us.”  He told them of the agreement with Evelyn’s parents, the letter from the girl’s parents canceling the contract and their plans to take custody after getting more help at Halamshiral. 

 

               Bull grunted again.  “You are saying an awful lot to strangers don’t you think? Is it wise to tell of your plans when you don’t know who we are?”

              

               The man waved him off.  “You’re mercenaries no?  Care to make a little coin?  We have the law on our side, we have nothing to hide.  If you help us, we will not have to travel all the way back to Halamshiral.  What do you say?”

 

               Bull laughed, and the rest of the Chargers laughed as well.  The couple looked confused as to why until Cullen spoke up.  “You do realize that you should take his advice correct?” as he indicated Bull.  “You should use more caution in your speech.”  The man looked at him questioningly.  “The child you are trying to take is my daughter, Charlotte Stanton Rutherford.  I am her father Bann Cullen Rutherford, this is her mother Bann Evelyn Rutherford, and our fellow travelers are our friends and protectors.”

              

               The man stood up angrily.  “You have no right to cancel the contract.  Such a match- our son to the daughter of the Inquisitor and the Commander, granddaughter of Bann Trevelyan.  Such power this match will give our families.  How can you say no?” he said angrily.

 

               Evelyn stood up.  “Because I do not believe in arranged marriages.  My daughter will have the right to choose who she wishes to marry if she chooses to marry at all.  My parents acted without our consent.  I have already spoken to Cyril De Montfort and drafted a letter to Empress Celene as he asked.  He is certain that she will nullify the contract.  I suggest you go home and forget about this.  You will not win.”

 

               The man started to draw his sword, only to find Evelyn’s dagger at his throat and everyone else in their party with their weapons drawn.  Evelyn continued, “I may only have one arm, but I can still fight.  I daresay better than you can.  You may share our fire and protection this night and tomorrow you will return home and say no more of this contract.  There will be no marriage, and if my parents contact you again, you will tell them as such.  I have no wish to spill more blood, so please do not try again.  For your sakes.”  She stood holding the blade to the man’s throat, a silence falling over the entire group.  Finally, the man took his hand off of his sword and nodded in agreement.

              

               “No!” the wife cried.  “We have already sealed the deal with gold.  We must be compensated.”

 

               Evelyn looked sharply at her.  “You will have to take that up with my parents.  Charlotte was not theirs to sell.”   The man looked at his wife and shook his head.  The both sat down in frustration but said no more.  Everyone re-sheathed their weapons and carried on with the evening.

                 
               The next morning, the two groups parted company and Evelyn and Cullen hurried home.  As they reached the outskirts of Honnleath, Evelyn wanted to speed up, but she slowed down, gazing at her missing arm.  Cullen pulled up alongside her and watched her as fear and indecision washed over her.  He put his hand on her arm.  “It’s not going to change how they feel about you, Evie,” he said to her.  “Come, our daughter is waiting.”  Evelyn smiled and nudged Brutus forward.

 

               They arrived in Honnleath to exclamations and applause from the villagers. They stared in surprise at Evelyn’s missing arm but said nothing- which relieved her.  She knew, though, that any comments they would have said would have been from concern and not derision, but she still was not ready to discuss it. 

              

               They found a place for Bull and the Chargers to stay in the meantime and rode out to the Sanctuary with the Templars they had brought along.  Both Evelyn and Cullen practically broke into a run when they saw Mia carrying Charlotte towards them- Charlotte squealing and holding her arms out to them both.   When Evelyn held out her arms to take Charlotte, Mia gasped in shock while Evelyn stepped back.  In her excitement as seeing her little girl, she had forgotten about her arm.  Evelyn hesitated, afraid of scaring Charlotte and feeling regret that she would no longer be able to wrap her arms around her little girl the way she used to.  She was used to carrying Charlotte on her hip using only one arm, while she did her chores and lived her life, but no more.  As she stared at her daughter, lost in thought, she missed the silent exchange between Cullen and Mia.  Mia smiled and held Charlotte out to Evelyn.  Cullen came up behind Evelyn, “Go ahead, Evie.  She’s missed you and wants you to take her.”

 

               Trembling, Evelyn reached out and took Charlotte in her remaining arm, feeling her missing arm reach up as if to caress Charlotte’s cheek.  She looked at Cullen with tears in her eyes.  “I can’t even touch her this way.  How can I do this?” she cried.  Cullen put his arms around both Evelyn and Charlotte as Charlotte squealed and reached her hands out to her Papae.  Evelyn pressed her forehead to Charlotte’s and just held her little girl.

 

               “I’m sorry I wasn’t here to protect you.  We’ll figure this out,” she whispered.  “I’m still your mamae.”  The three stood quietly holding each other before Charlotte let out an impatient squawk and they laughed.  “Ah, a tearful reunion cut short by a hungry girl”, Evelyn laughed.  They walked into the Sanctuary kitchen to get Charlotte something to eat while Mia followed behind.  Evelyn asked Mia to get all of the family together and to gather all of the Templars she could and get everyone to the meeting place.  There was much to tell.

 

               After a quick dinner, and a quick introduction between Charlotte and Maximus, everyone had gathered as they had requested.  As Evelyn went to the front of the room, she knew all eyes were on her missing arm.  “I know you all have questions, and I see that you all have noticed my…” she glanced down at her arm.  “There is much to tell.  First, thank you for defending Charlotte and keeping her safe.  You can rest assured that we have heard the last of that family.”  She told them about meeting them on the road and everything that had happened.

 

               After that, she told them about what happened at the Exalted Council- the Qunari, Solas, the loss of her arm and the disbanding of the Inquisition.  She explained that even though there was no longer an Inquisition, all of the members were still going to be working in their own capacity to stop Solas from destroying the world and that the Sanctuary was going to become the new center with news and travelers coming and going. 

 

               “In a few days, Cullen and I will be going to see King Alistair and Queen Elissa, and then we are going to head to Ostwick to see my brother Osborne.  We are hoping to enlist their help in this.   We will be taking Charlotte with us this time, and Bull and his Chargers are accompanying us on this trip- so we will be safe.”

 

               After the meeting, several people approached Evelyn to pledge their support- the Templars especially.  Ser Geoffrey came to her, examining her arm.  He was an older man who had suffered severely from Lyrium withdrawal- he had been so broken when he was first brought in.  Now he looked hale and hearty, in spite of his scars and injuries.  He chuckled, poking her arm, “We match,” he laughed.  Evelyn couldn’t help but smile.  “It’s hard isn’t it?” he asked her, “when it first happens. You seem to be handling it well.”

              

               Evelyn looked down.  “I don’t know.  I don’t have a choice but to get used to it, but I could barely even pick up my daughter without doubting myself.  Cullen reminded me about you and recommended I come see you for help.”  She looked over to Cullen who was talking with Branson while bouncing Charlotte in his arms.  She sighed.  “Every time I think I’ll be able to figure this out, I find a limitation that holds me back.  I can’t take the time to wallow in self-pity, and I can’t do this on my own.  Will you help me?”

 

               Ser Geoffrey nodded.  “Of course my Lady.  I’m not sure I can help you with everything- I’m not a cook or a parent.  But I can show you how to split wood, and perhaps maybe help you work out a new fighting method.  I know you love your daggers, but it may be time to change.  You think on it.  We can talk tomorrow.  Now- it looks like your sister-in-law is trying to get your attention.” 

 

               Evelyn looked over to see Chana coming over carrying Kronin, a smile on her face.  They talked for a while before Warrick came over to join them.  “Warrick, do you want to come along?” Evelyn asked.  “Bring the family?”  Evelyn had thought about it on the way home.  She knew that Warrick was happy to have grown closer to Osborne and his family after years of separation and distance, and she did not want to deny him the opportunity to see him.

 

               Warrick thought about it for a moment.  “I would like to see Osborne again, but not at the expense of the rest of our family making Chana and our child feel like second-class citizens.”  Evelyn thought about that for a moment.  He continued, “And going without them would feel like I am hiding them, or I am ashamed of them.” 

 

               “I don’t plan on spending any time with Mother or Father, or Clarissa, and we will be staying at the Inn.  Think on it tonight Warrick.  I think Osborne would be disappointed if you didn’t come.”  Warrick promised to talk about it with Chana and let her know tomorrow.

 

               That night, after they got Charlotte settled in their home, Cullen and Evelyn cuddled on the couch by the fire, talking about the events of the day.  They both knew they had a busy day tomorrow- gathering what they needed for the next part of their trip and Evelyn’s visit with Ser Geoffrey planned as well.  She told him about his recommendation for a new method of fighting and Cullen promised to be available to be part of that. 


	55. Chapter Fifty- Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So, the last chapter. I'm not thrilled with it- and may revisit and make some improvements. I may come back and do more with it when the next game comes out as well. I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it. Thanks for the kudos and feedback!

Chapter Fifty-Five

 

               After several days on the road, they finally reached Denerim to a grand and enthusiastic greeting by Alistair, Elissa and Baby Duncan.  Evelyn was glad to see her friends, and they all spent the evening after dinner visiting and playing with the babies.  Evelyn was glad to see Warrick and Chana getting along so well with her friends- they had spent some time together at Skyhold, but not as much as Evelyn and Cullen had. 

              

               The subject came around to the Calling- Evelyn asked if any progress had been made.  Elissa smiled.  It turned out that having Duncan removed her taint, so they had started to focus on why that was.  The research had led to the discovery about Fiona and Alistair’s true parentage- and the Theirin bloodline containing a possible cure.  They had brought Fiona to Denerim so that Alistair could spend some time with her, but it was under the guise as a former Grey Warden.  Fiona had begged them to keep the secret, and Elissa asked the same thing of Evelyn and Cullen- but there had been no need to ask.  She knew they would.  So, Alistair and Elissa were cured of the Taint and no longer Grey Wardens.

 

               After a little while, Elissa asked Evelyn to take a walk with her.  As they walked along, Elissa asked her a strange question.  “How are you and Cullen getting along these days?” Evelyn looked at her questioningly- so Elissa quickly kept talking.  “When Alistair and I first got together, a lot of people told us that we wouldn’t last.  Relationships formed in the heat of war tend to burn out, people kept telling me.  I’m not going to say that it’s always been easy- I know Alistair told you about our separation after the miscarriage, but we found our way back to each other.  We always have.  I was just curious if you had ever been told the same thing.”

 

               Evelyn thought about it for a while.  “I think we’ve been fine.  I think because we didn’t stay at Skyhold though.  If we would have stayed there without having a goal, we may have had some trouble.  We had almost a full year of a quiet life, raising our baby, working on the Sanctuary.  It was nice.  The only person who ever said anything was my sister Clarissa.  She said that Cullen would never have noticed me if it hadn’t have been for the Anchor.  I don’t know if she was right or not, but it doesn’t matter.  He’s been my rock- I couldn’t ask for better.”

 

               Elissa smiled.  “I’m glad to hear that.  Wynne had been the first one to worry about us, but she was also the first to apologize when she saw we had something special.  I see the same thing in the two of you.  I remember Cullen from Kinloch Keep- I had thought of him often after that too- wondering how he was getting along if his history had kept him from being happy.”

 

               “It did for a long time,” Evelyn said.  “He told me about it all eventually.  It was so hard for him to say some of it out loud and I really had to be patient, but it was worth it.  I think that it really helped him beat the lyrium, getting it all off of his chest.  If you could see him now, feeding Charlotte, putting her down for a nap- he told me he wants to be as involved as he can because he never pictured himself being a father.  He’s mentioned having another one.”

              

               Elissa laughed.  “So has Alistair.  Now that the taint is gone, it would probably be easier to get pregnant again.  You never know…”

 

               The next day, as had been arranged, the adults, including Gaspard and Cyril de Montfort met to talk about the Exalted Council- without Teagan.  Evelyn understood why Teagan felt the way he did, but she was still angry about the accusations he made and the way he spoke to her.  They all readily agreed to keep their ears to the ground and pass on anything they heard, as Evelyn knew they would.  They spent a few more days at the Palace visiting and letting the children play before they took off for Skyhold.

              

               Evelyn knew this would be a bittersweet visit to Skyhold- it was here that she really began to live.  She had put together her own family, stood up to her parents, met and married the love of her life and had her baby here.  They had come to finish the disbanding process, and there was much to do.  It had been decided that Skyhold would become a trade center and a place for travelers to stop at- Bonny Sims had been working hard to recruit more vendors, knowing that Skyhold would become a place of pilgrimage for the next several years.  Even Horsemaster Barrett was going to stay at Skyhold to tend to horses for travelers and the Herald’s rest was staying open as well.  It only took a few weeks to get everything transferred over, and it was time for Evelyn to take a final look at the home she had loved so well.   Cullen once again found her in what had been Solas’ room, looking at the paintings again.  He came and sat beside her as she looked around the room.  “Cullen, I hope I can change his mind.  I think he really wants me to.  I don’t understand why he would want me to, but still, is planning on destroying this world.”  She fingered her necklace again as she stared at the paintings.  She sighed.  “In spite of everything, I miss him.”

 

               Cullen put his arm around her.  “I know,” he said.  “I don’t understand either, but we will do what we can.”  He squeezed her to him.

 

               As they prepared to leave, they gave instructions to those who were traveling to the Sanctuary, everyone said their final goodbyes and went their separate ways.  Evelyn and her crew, still being accompanied by Bull and his Chargers were heading to Ostwick next.

 

               As they traveled along to Ostwick, Evelyn thought about seeing her family again.  She was looking forward to seeing Osborne and his family and was hoping to see Clarissa’s children again, but not too keen on the rest.  Cullen rode up alongside her, Charlotte seated before him on his horse. “We could always send a letter if you’d rather go home,” he offered.  He didn’t really want to go either, but it seemed important to Evie to see her brother again, so he would be supportive and go along.

              

               “I know Cullen.  I really want to talk to Osborne about this face to face.  I know Warrick wants to see him too.  We’ll just have to deal with the rest,” she sighed. 

              

               They made it to Ostwick fairly quickly thanks to good weather and were greeted by Osborne and his family as they arrived at his home.  Osborne stopped short when he saw Evelyn’s arm, looking sad for his little sister.  “It’s all right, Brother, I’m getting used to it,” she told him.  “It’s been an adjustment, but I’ve got great support.”

 

               After talking about their plans with Osborne, they had a lively dinner with everyone before settling in for the night. Osborne agreed to help them by passing on whatever news he heard and to send any Templars their way if they needed help. Evelyn sat up talking with Osborne for a bit while Cullen took Charlotte to bed.  She told him about running into the Orlesian family and told him they might be looking for recompense for gold. Osborne shook his head. “Mother and Father will have to be responsible for that- I didn’t know they had accepted gold for her.  It’s probably more Mother- she was pretty upset when she didn’t get her payout from the Remarche family.”

              

               The next day, Evelyn took Cullen and Charlotte around Ostwick to show them the sights, even stopping in at the Chantry to introduce her family to the remaining members.  When they arrived back at Osborne’s, Evelyn was delighted to see Sophie and Piper had been brought over.  They squealed and tackled their aunt- barely noticing her missing arm.  Evelyn took the girls to lunch- just the three of them so they could talk.  She told them that she knew they had been arranged for their futures, but that didn’t mean they had to follow through.

  
               “What do you girls want to do?” she asked them.  They both looked down at their laps, reluctant to speak.  “Hey,” Evelyn said- “this is me.  You can speak freely.”

               Sophie looked up. “I want to travel, and I want to find my own husband- just like you Auntie.” Evelyn smiled.

              

               Piper spoke up. “Me too, Auntie.  I don’t want to go to the Chantry.” 

              

               “Well, girls, I don’t have a lot of pull with the Grandparents- I wish I did.  I promise you that I will do everything I can to help you.  Your Uncle will keep me informed.  If, when the time comes, you still feel the way you do, I will do everything I can to help you.  I promise.”

              

               The girls looked a little more cheerful at that- knowing they had their aunt on their side.  They spent the rest of lunch telling Evelyn about their knife throwing practice and their lessons.  Evelyn told them about the Sanctuary and how they helped people- and was surprised to see the look of interest on Sophie’s face.  She asked a lot of questions about what they did there and how they helped people.

 

               She noticed Clarissa’s eyes going to her missing arm as she dropped the girls off after lunch, but said nothing.  When the girls had gone with their tutors, her sister turned to her with a smug expression.  “So no longer the big Inquisitor, huh? How does your husband feel about your missing arm?”

              

               Evelyn rolled her eyes.  “Really Clarissa?  Still hung up on all of this?  No, I’m no longer the Inquisitor.  We have a happy life in Honnleath- nice and quiet- just like we wanted.  Cullen is fine with my arm- he has been since it happened. So good for you.  You can go back to being the pretty one.  Hope you find fulfillment with that.”  Evelyn shook her head as she left their home.

              

               The next morning, Cullen woke to find Evelyn scrambling out of bed to vomit.  He got up to help her as she crawled back into bed. “Are you all right, Love?” he asked her as he rubbed her back. 

 

               “I think so,” she mumbled.  She lay quietly for a little while before having to get up again.  Cullen watched her with concern as she crawled back into bed.  Evelyn lay quietly, thinking for a while.  “Cullen- I think I’m pregnant.”

              

               Cullen sat up quickly.  “Are you certain?” Evelyn was quiet for a little bit, thinking, and nodded.

              

               “A trip to the healer wouldn’t hurt- but I’m pretty sure.”  Cullen smiled and put his arms around her, resting his hand on her belly.

 

               “If it’s true, I couldn’t be more thrilled, my Love,” he whispered to her.

              

               The trip back to Honnleath was very uncomfortable for Evelyn- especially their time on the ship.  Cullen spent quite a bit of time caring for both Charlotte and Evelyn, watching over her anxiously.  He remembered how sick she had gotten last time, and was afraid that her health would suffer from the added stress of seasickness on top of morning sickness.  When they landed in Highever, Cullen found a healer as quickly as he could to check on her and was relieved to find that both Evelyn and the baby were all right.

 

They arrived back at Honnleath and shared the happy news, settling back into their quiet existence. The remaining residents of Skyhold had arrived at the Sanctuary while they had been gone- so Cullen and Evelyn arrived at a very bustling center of activity.  More Templars arrived every month until the place was bursting at the seams- which made Cullen grateful for the extra help.  Eventually, some of the Templars who had successfully completed their treatment went back to their hometowns and started their own Sanctuary, helping many Templars overcome their addiction to lyrium.

 

Evelyn and Cullen welcomed their second child, a little boy they named Josiah Clancy after Cullen’s father and Evelyn’s friend.  True to his word, Cullen let Evelyn had all the cookies she wanted during her pregnancy. Sophie and Piper never forgot their aunt’s promise to them, sending letters to her when they were ready to make their escape.  Osborne helped Evelyn get Sophie first, bringing her back to Honnleath before her untimely marriage.  Sophie enthusiastically settled into helping at the Sanctuary, living with her Aunt and Uncle and cousins until she met and married a local boy and had a family of her own.

 

Divine Victoria took care of helping Piper when she was turned over to the Chantry- having her sent to Honnleath as well.  Piper spent many hours working with her daggers with her Aunt until she reached her adulthood and ended up traveling to help Dorian in Tevinter. 

 

Every few years, the remaining companions would gather at Skyhold to spend time together, bringing their families and sharing news. Alistair and Elissa would join them with their children as well, the cure for the Calling affording them a much longer life than they anticipated.  It would be a happy reunion for everyone- a gathering of Evelyn’s true family that she always looked forward to.

 

Every time they found themselves at Skyhold, Cullen would always find Evelyn sitting in Solas’ old room, gazing sadly at the paintings and missing her friend.  She never stopped wondering about him and hoping she would see him again one day, intent on proving to him that this world was worth saving.

 

~FIN~

              


End file.
